CagePotato took part in the UFC press conference held today in advance of Wednesday’s UFC Fight Night. Headliners Mike “Quick” Swick and Josh “The People’s Warrior” Burkman answered questions from the press along with Patrick Cote and Drew McFedries.

A recap:

-Dana White “couldn’t make it”. Hangover or jet lag. Or both.

-Mike Swick was asked if he has concerns about dropping to welterweight: “Not really, I feel really good right now.” He hasn’t gotten down to this weight since 1997. His walk-around weight is 185. How’d he do it? Diet and exercise – who knew those two could help you lose weight?

-Patrick Cote has ADD.

-Game Day routine for Mike Swick: He starts focusing on the fight when he wakes up and really starts focusing on it when he leaves the locker room.

-Game Day routine for Patrick Cote: Sleeps late, hangs out and doesn’t get nervous. Secrets revealed!

-Game Day routine for Josh Burkman: Listens to his headphones and doesn’t think about the fight too much. Oh, and hanging out, of course.

Don’t forget: the weigh-ins for UFC 80 will happen this Friday at the Metroradio Arena in jolly ‘ole Newcastle, England. The fun is supposed to go down at 4 p.m. – which translates to 11 a.m. for us Yanks. Doors are supposed to open for the event an hour before and even earlier for UFC fan club members (you know who you are) – provided you can make the overseas drive to England. The event will not be broadcast live.

UFC 80 will rock the joint on Saturday and will be broadcast live at 3 p.m. ET. You can also check out the tape delay if you’re lame at 10 p.m. ET. Both will be on Pay-Per-View. The event will feature BJ Penn vs. Joe Stevenson, Gabriel Gonzaga vs. Fabricio Werdum and Kendall Grove vs. Jorge Rivera.

In other UFC news, it’s being widely reported today that UFC 83 – rumored to also be going down in England – will probably be happening in the United States instead. A source is saying that the Brit locale is a definite no go, but the show will plow forward (March 8th).

UFC 82 is happening March 1st in Columbus, Ohio, so having another event happen so soon after that seemed a bit ambitious anyway. Maybe this is part of Dana White’s hype machine. Or just his deal-breaking cockiness. Or both. The bald wonder has certainly been vocal about getting more UFC events into Europe and Asia and this was the year to do that. This poses a bit of a set-back, but if the upcoming January 19th event goes as planned, that ground may be regained quickly.

No statements just yet as to where UFC 83 might really happen. I’m voting for Hope, Indiana, population 2,000. They need some MMA up in there.

We all know the negotiations between CBS and the UFC have gone the way of the Hollywood writer’s strike: nowhere. MMAPayout is reporting that creative differences might be to blame – which means Dana was being a dick (see the failed attempt at a Fedor vs. Randy fight as reference). An HBO deal bit the dust even before the CBS deal did, so now it looks like Dana’s next failed negotiation attempt could be NBC – although this may already be DOA.

Check it:

…the UFC has reportedly reached out to NBC as late as last week. The reception was reportedly cold with the peacock network having little interest in working with the UFC and particularly Dana White. NBC does not appear interested in prime time programming, making the UFC a poor fit in addition to any concerns they might have about White.

NBC continues to talk with a number of players about late night time slots, including the IFL, Strikeforce, M-1, and K-1. Speculation within the industry suggests that Strikeforce, with financial backing from Hewlett-Packard, may have already came to terms with the network, however, such a deal would not preclude other promotions involvement.

Looks pretty grim if you were jonesin’ to see Edith strut her stuff between rounds on one of the Big Four. But the other prospects sound cool.

(Couture and a pre-Headblade Dana White.)

The Las Vegas Review Journal has reported that lawyers for Zuffa have filed suit alleging that Randy Couture’s comments about the UFC have led to significant financial losses for the company, and that he is in breach of his contract. The lawsuit is complicated by a “conspiracy” charge, claiming that other people worked with Couture to intentionally inflict harm on the UFC, and the breach-of-contract refers specifically to a stipulation that prohibits him from engaging in “direct or indirect competition” with the UFC for a year after he leaves the organization. Couture’s sponsorship of a team in the IFL may violate this, and Zuffa is seeking an injunction to prohibit him from continuing his participation. According to the article, “The lawsuit seeks damages in excess of $10,000 and states that the amount of both compensatory and punitive damages would be proven at trial.”

Said Dana White:

“What’s really tough for me, to be honest, is we have been friends for a very long time,” White said. “The hard part is that he is not living up to his obligations. Captain America is not keeping his word.”

Dana White, during a UFC 80 press conference today:

“Look at the NFL. There’s nothing bigger in this country than the NFL. They’ve been spending billions of dollars trying to break into Europe and they can’t do it, because nobody gives a (expletive) about football in Europe. They didn’t grow up playing football, they don’t know about it. I take two guys and put them in the Octagon and they can use any martial art they want. It translates through all different cultural barriers, language barriers… people love fighting.”

In other words, the thing that drives us apart will be the very thing that unites us. I kinda like that. Can that be the tagline for Red Devil?

During the press conference, White announced that the UFC would be doing an event in Scotland as soon as possible, and is working to get events authorized in New York and Hawaii. He also described the Matt Serra-hosted UFC 79 viewing party at Madison Square Garden as “a very successful event.” I’d love to get independent confirmation of that claim, but I haven’t been able to find anything online. If you or someone you know attended the MSG party, holler at us and let us know what it was like. We’re guessing “poorly attended and awkward” — is that about right?

As we roll towards UFC 80, the hype machine is already revving for UFC 81. I, however, still have the burr of Sokoudjou’s hype rammed up my ass and am going to proceed with caution. My particular focus is on the building hype surrounding Brock Lesnar, the former college wrestling champ, WWE champ, NFL shit-causer, Japan pro wrestling star and now undefeated MMA fighter (1-0). It was announced at UFC 77 that Lesnar had signed with the UFC, so we knew it was just a matter of time before we started hearing the hype drums in the distance. He faces off against Frank Mir on February 2nd in Las Vegas.

Lesnar’s story might be an interesting one, but only because he’s earned a reputation for pissing in the face of success. I’m not convinced he’s going to be a force in the UFC, but if he does pull his shit together and starts making waves, I wouldn’t be surprised if he bolted like he always does. However, if he does become a huge UFC force, I will erase this post and replace it with one where I predict Lesnar will be the next UFC king. That’s how I roll.

Let’s glance at our most recent hype example. The bad taste of The African Assassin’s loss has been particularly rank for bettors. Some of the lines had Sokoudjou and Machida almost even at UFC 79 with some giving the edge to Machida. Yet most sites like this one still suggested betting Sokoudjou. Message boards around the MMA world threw more fuel on the hype fire and by the afternoon of the 28th, it was being reported by BloodyElbow that wages were being placed overwhelmingly on Sokoudjou. Not that the Assassin didn’t have a shot. He had impressive KO’s in PRIDE, is a ball of muscle and those dreds look badass. But this is the UFC and Machida has been winning in Dana World already. He’s a counter strike specialist and his ground game is one of the best (notice BloodyElbow saw past the Sokoudjou bullshit).

Did we – and bettors – pay attention to this? We’d like to say yes, but the hype monster is too fucking strong sometimes and we don’t realize it until we see the guy we bet (Sokoudjou) on his back for most of the fight looking like a turtle flipped on his shell. I don’t blame us. We just want to be there when the next dominating fighter bursts on the scene — is that so wrong? So when you feel the urge to throw down your life’s savings on Brock Lesnar just because something inside is telling you to, that’s not intuition. It’s Dana White’s hype machine.Note: We should mention that one of Lesnar’s nicknames is “The Next Big Thing”. Subtle.

Quote of the week, from Randy Couture via the Houston Chronicle:

“We got an official offer from M-1 to the UFC to do a co-promotion for the Couture-Emelianenko fight, and they (UFC) rejected that offer. Really, the only thing standing in the way for that fight right now is Dana and the UFC. Obviously, M-1 is happy to do a co-promotion like that. It only serves to help them. I think the UFC is looking at it the other way, and it’s like why do we want to help out another organization? The fans want to see that fight. At some point, you have to put that first.”

How weak of a puff-piece B.J. was last night’s “Ultimate Fighting: From Blood Sport to Big Time” special on CNBC? I think this quote says it all:

“At six feet and a chiseled 210 pounds, Dana White looks every bit the ferocious ultimate fighting champion.”

Whaaaaaa? You mean the paunchy, doughy Dana White? That one? Look, we realize you’ve been paid off, but at least try to maintain the illusion of journalistic integriity. This is television — you can’t tell us things that are straight-up contradicted by the images on the screen. FightOpinion has a full recap of the half-assed UFC informercial, so give it look if you’d like to be disgusted even further.

And here’s something I learned today: When you do a Google Image Search for Dana White (no quotes), the first result takes you to SlyBaldGuys.com (“the place where bald guys rule!”). Among the support group message boards and product reviews of balm and wipes, White is featured in a roundup page called “5 Successful Bald Men,” where he shares space with such hairless luminaries as Iron Chef America winner Michael Symon and creepy character actor Jackie Earle Haley. Kind of a low-rent list, if you ask me. They couldn’t find room for Bruce Willis, Neil Strauss and Edward Norton in American History X?

By CagePotato contributor Kipp Tribble

Yesterday, BJ “The Prodigy” Penn received a sentence of one year’s probation and was ordered to pay $2,000 in restitution for hitting a Honolulu police officer during a melee outside of a Waikiki bar in 2005. As part of the no-contest plea to 3rd-degree assault charges, Penn must also abstain from alcohol, perform 50 hours of community service and submit to a substance abuse treatment program and random drug and alcohol tests. (Ed. note: Abstain from alcohol? Personally, we’d take the jail time — and we think Don Frye would agree.) Penn was also ordered to not travel outside the United States — well, unless it’s to fight in England next month at UFC 80 and make some scratch, then it’s okay. But otherwise, they’re cracking down!

This comes on the same day as Fighthype’s interview with Sean Sherk, where the Anabolic Muscle Shark had some not-so-nice things to say about Penn:

“I think BJ Penn is a punk. Who the hell is he? He’s won one fight in a couple of years now and it’s just whatever man. He wants to make all of these rules and regulations, but who the hell is he? I’m the champ in my eyes so I don’t care if he fights me or not, there’s a whole bunch of guys that could fight me right now. It’s his loss, not mine. He needs me more than I need him.”

Dana White blew his load a little early over the weekend. Before his “big announcement” today, he let it slip at the end of The Ultimate Fighter 6 Finale that Forrest Griffin will be one of the coaches on The Ultimate Fighter 7. He also teased that he had “big plans” for UFC Light Heavyweight Champion, Quinton “Rampage” Jackson in the new year, leaving us to conclude that he’d be the other coach.

White also noted that the two coaches will fight each another when the TUF 7 series is completed. Shooting begins in January and will likely debut on SpikeTV in April 08. It will feature 16 up-and-coming Middleweight (185 pounds) fighters.

Although Rampage and Griffin are 205 pounds, they should have any problem coaching the middleweight contenders. At the very least, The Ultimate Fighter will get a shot of personality that it so desperately needs, and hopefully another chance to fill the void in the Middleweight division.

Like King George III and Hugh Grant before him, Michael Bisping is quickly establishing himself as a Brit who Americans love to hate. During a post-fight press conference, Bisping was asked how he felt about the way the crowd reacted to him during UFC 78. His witty response: “They can all go to hell.” Listen to the audio here. As Mr. Sunshine reports, “it did put a slight grimace on the face of UFC president Dana White, who was standing behind Bisping.” Though we imagine if Dana was in Bisping’s shoes, he’d probably say something more along the lines of “Basically, Jersey can go fuck itself.”

Adam Carolla, who we’ve idolized since his Loveline days, had Dana White as a guest on his radio show this morning to plug UFC 78 (you can listen to the audio here). We were particularly surprised by the following:

— Dana White and the Fertitta brothers bought the UFC for $2 million in 2001 and then proceeded to lose $44 million over the next three years.

— Though he didn’t say anything during the segment, Danny Bonaduce is apparently Adam’s sidekick on the show. Good for you, Danny!

The UFC held a media conference call yesterday to pump up UFC 78, and since I wasn’t around to liveblog it — I know, disappointing, right? — you’ll have to settle for this recap. Dana White, Michael Bisping, Rashad Evans, and Houston Alexander were in attendance, and the audio from the call can be heard here.

Among the revelations…

— Dana White has officially offered Randy Couture a title defense against Antonio Rodrigo “Minotauro” Nogueira. The match would fulfill the last fight on Couture’s UFC contract; he isn’t technically in violation of that contract unless he turns the fight down. Couture texted White on Sunday and they are planning to discuss it next week. Nogueira is a former PRIDE heavyweight champion who won his first UFC fight in July via unanimous decision against Heath Herring. Never, ever do a Google Image Search for “Nogueira.”

In the market for a pre-owned vehicle? Well heads up, because Randy Couture is auctioning off the limited edition H2 Hummer that Dana White gave him for participating as a coach on the first season of The Ultimate Fighter. The bidding is supposed to start today, so go to Xtreme Couture for details and a full photo gallery of the vehicle in question. It hasn’t been confirmed if Randy is selling off the Hummer to make room in his garage for a more environmentally conscious Toyota Prius, or if it’s just a petty “fuck you” to Dana White, but we’re guessing it’s the latter.

[Refresh page every few minutes to read the latest verbal brutality from Dana and the gang (and my own take on it). Enjoy.]

Today at 1 p.m. PT, UFC prez Dana White and UFC co-owner Lorenzo Fertitta will hold a press conference to address recent statements made by Randy Couture and answer questions for the media. MMAjunkie.com reports that UFC’s chief financial officer John Mulkey will also participate in the press conference, hopefully to illuminate some of the mystery behind the UFC’s signing bonuses, “locker-room bonuses,” and pay-per-view percentages. The press conference will be streamed live on UFC.com; stay tuned for wild liveblogging action, which will hopefully run a lot smoother than last time.

If you’re like the vast majority of Americans, you’ve never seen an episode of Shark. And I hadn’t either until last night, when I was flipping through the ol’ digital cable and came across this description: “A fighting league’s CEO is charged with murder for pushing steroids.” Whoa, ripped from the headlines much?! I had to watch to see how this would play out.

First of all, Shark is basically a homeless-man’s Law and Order, where the show opens with a gruesome murder (inspired by a recent real-life news story), multiple people become suspects, and there’s a few twists and courtroom shockers at the end which lead to someone unexpected being nailed for the crime; a five-year-old could write this shit. So, the plot of last night’s episode: Steve Abbott, the heavyweight champion and #1 box-office attraction of the UFL (Ultimate Fighting League!) is found dead in his home from a gunshot wound to the head. James Woods and his crew first visit Abbott’s training partner Rick, who reveals that steroid use is rampant in the league. Woods makes the intellectual leap that the UFL’s CEO, Teddy Banks, forces his fighters to take steroids as a condition of their employment. They pay a visit to the league’s doctor, who folds like your mother on laundry day.

If anybody has the comic book this comes from, could you lend it to me? Seems interesting…

Some questions I had after watching SpikeTV’s “The 25 Tuffest Moments of All Time”…

— Has Forrest Griffin ever made a TV appearance where his face wasn’t covered in scabs and bruises? It’s as if him and Stephan Bonnar showed up to the taping and the producers were like, “Alright, let’s get Stephan into makeup, pronto. Forrest, we’re going to need to lay into your face with a phone book for 15 minutes or so, then rub dirt in your hair. Cool? You’re gonna look super tough.” I know the dude fights for a living and all, but I have a feeling he engages in some high-risk behavior on the side. Just speculating, here. Or maybe his body just doesn’t heal as fast as the average person’s. Maybe he has the opposite of what Wolverine has. Poor guy…