Insane Chimp Fight – Watch More Funny Videos
(Well, that escalated quickly. Watch out for the appearance of the stick-sword at 1:02. Props: Break.com)

Roy Nelson: “It Only Takes One Shot to Become a Champion” (BleacherReport)

One Year After Much-Heralded Deal, King Mo Lawal Quietly Has First U.S. Pro Wrestling Match (MMAFighting)

Mark Munoz’s Low Point, And The Battles Fight Fans Rarely See (MMAJunkie)

“Metamoris 2: Gracie vs. Aoki” Video Trailer (YouTube.com/Metamoris)

Shannon Ihrke, Invicta FC Ring Girl: Top 10 Sexiest Photos (FightDay)

Cheick Kongo Turned Down Four Fight Contract Before UFC 159 (BloodyElbow)

Diego Sanchez Isn’t Impressed With Ben Henderson, Sees a Lot of Holes in His Game (MiddleEasy)

8 Creepy Dating Apps You Shouldn’t Download (MensFitness)

The 100 Worst Yearbook Photos Ever (WorldwideInterweb)

Reese Witherspoon’s Dash Cam Arrest Video Is Her Best Performance Yet (FilmDrunk)

The Most Surprising Clutch NBA Playoff Performances of All Time (Complex)

Brittney Griner Signs With A Chinese Team Because It Pays A Lot More (Deadspin)

The Funniest Counterfeits Ever Photographed (DoubleViking)

Avoiding the Dreaded ‘Friend Zone’, Part 1 (EgoTV)

(We don’t care what any of you say, post-all out war Wandy is the happiest Wandy. Photo courtesy of Getty Images.) 

Heading into last night’s co-main event, it seemed as if everyone involved in the production of UFC on FUEL 8 was actively trying to underperform. Chalk it up to jet lag perhaps, but in a decision-filled card that saw the hype trains of Siyar Bahadurzada and Hector Lombard come to a screeching halt (or in the latter’s case, go completely off the rails and crash into an orphanage), referee and judging incompetence was once again forced down our throats like fat jokes in a Kevin James movie.

Split decisions were seemingly handed out at random, costing Takanori Gomi a much deserved victory over Diego Sanchez and astonishingly nearly granting Lombard one in his lopsided loss to Yushin Okami. Even Herb Dean seemed out of it, at one point threatening a standup in the Kim/Bahadurzada fight while Kim had mount. It was an event that basically highlighted all the negative things Big John McCarthy had to say about the current state of MMA, and one so tedious at times that it managed to draw boos from the Japanese. The Japanese, you guys.

But then, that freakin’ co-main event happened. Was Mark Hunt‘s back and forth brawl with Stefan Struve the most technically advanced thing you’ve ever seen? No, but has any Stefan Struve or Mark Hunt fight ever gone down in that fashion? As with the main event that would come after it, Hunt vs. Struve was a good old fashioned slobberknocker that showcased the heart of its participants more than anything else. And if you can’t appreciate that, well, you probably can’t appreciate the finer points of a crippling meth/child porn addiction either.

(I don’t know, man. It’s just not the same without Joe Rogan creeping into your personal space. / Photo via MMAJunkie)

Wanderlei Silva, Mark Hunt, Takanori Gomi, the Saitama Super Arena — if you squint your eyes, maybe you can convince yourself that PRIDE, in fact, neva die. The UFC is back in Japan today with a crowd-pleasing lineup of battle-scarred legends, rising stars, and whatever you’d call Diego Sanchez and Brian Stann at this point. (“Reliable bangers”? Yeah, I guess that works.)

Taking us through the action is George Shunick, who will be stacking live results from the FUEL TV main card after the jump beginning at 10 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. PT. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and share your own feelings in the comments section.

(Sanchez’ unorthodox weight-cutting method did not work as well as he had hoped)

Diego Sanchez signed on to move back down to lightweight for the first time in three years for the opportunity to fight legendary former champion Takanori Gomi in his home nation of Japan at tonight’s UFC on Fuel 8 event but at yesterday’s weigh-ins did not make the category’s weight limit. A smooth-fleshed and drained looking Diego weighed in two pounds over the lightweight non-title fight limit of 156 pounds.

Gomi could have refused to fight Sanchez at that point but has reportedly agreed to still fight Sanchez. Diego will now be docked 20% of his purse by the UFC.

Ordinarily, in states like Nevada, when a fighter misses weight, 20% of their purse is taken by the athletic commission. Half of that amount is given to their opponent and the other half is taken by the commission and given to their state’s general budget.

UFC on Fuel 8 is being self-regulated by the UFC and, at this point, it is unknown what, exactly, the organization will do with Sanchez’ penalized purse percentage. In any case, the fight is on, and Sanchez took to twitter to apologize to his opponent and fans….wait, no.

That would make too much sense. Our freewheeling, cartwheeling, mean-mugging friend actually used his twitter account after weigh ins to preemptively complain about Gomi and taunt the Japanese fighter.

“Gomi better not be crying I missed weight, after I win because those 2 lbs cost 24 thousand dollars. If I could have cut it I would have “ Sanchez tweeted early this morning.

(“Yeah, I have a question for the group: Is anybody *not* getting too old for this shit?” / Photo via Sherdog)

A pair of former PRIDE champions will be anchoring the UFC’s return to Japan. As confirmed by the promotion yesterday, UFC on FUEL 8 is slated for Sunday, March 3rd, at the Saitama Super Arena, with Wanderlei Silva vs. Brian Stann booked for the main event. [Update: The fight will take place at light-heavyweight.] Both men are coming off of decision losses, with Silva dropping his rematch to Rich Franklin at UFC 147 in June, and Stann losing to Michael Bisping in September.

Though Silva probably has little recollection of the last time he competed in Saitama, the Axe Murderer became an MMA superstar in Japan, where he went undefeated through his first 20 fights in PRIDE and held the middleweight title for over five years. But his current stint in the UFC — where he’s won just three of eight fights since 2007 — has suggested that Silva is nearing the end of the road, and his next bad loss could be his last. Can he come up with another heroic effort against the All American?

Speaking of PRIDE legends, longtime lightweight champ Takanori Gomi will be welcoming Diego Sanchez back to the lightweight division at UFC on FUEL 8. Gomi has won his last two UFC fights against Eiji Mitsuoka and Mac Danzig, while Sanchez is coming off a decision defeat against Jake Ellenberger in February. Sanchez hasn’t competed at 155 pounds since being utterly shredded by BJ Penn during their lightweight title fight three years ago.

Pretty damn good for a free card, right? Keep in mind that the event will also feature the heavyweight battle between Mark Hunt and Stefan Struve, plus the following newly-announced supporting bouts…

(Who knew that “The Dream” was actually short for “The Wet Dream Brought on by Auto-Erotic Asphyxiation”?) 

After going 2-2 in his return to the welterweight division, which began back in 2010 and included wins over Paulo Thiago and Martin Kampmann, as well as a most recent loss to Jake Ellenberger at the inaugural UFC on FUEL event, it looks like Diego Sanchez is headed back down to lightweight. We have been told by an anonymous source that the move has nothing to do with the fact that B.J. Penn a.k.a the man who handed Sanchez the worst beating of his career has returned to the welterweight division, but rather because BJ Penn a.k.a the man who handed Sanchez the worst beating of his career has left the lightweight division. So rest assured, Sanchez is definitely not ducking B.J. Penn.

Sanchez made the announcement over his Twitter account earlier today in a conversation with UFC color commentator Joe Rogan:

@joerogan there isn’t anyone out there that understands Mma as a whole like you do! Thanks Joe, its back to 155 for me… Should be good!!

(Praises be to The UG for this bonerific gif.) 

Mamma Mia. It isn’t often that one of the UFC’s crowd shots really causes that much of a stir in the MMA world — sure, there is the “Just Bleed” guy, Diego Sanchez’s spiritual life partner, and Mickey Rourke’s frigid girlfriend — but suffice it to say, we may have found the crowd gif to end all crowd gifs in the mysterious “girl in the white dress” that was spotted at UFC on FOX 4. Say what you want about women’s beach volleyball, but this girl packs more power than all of Team Brazil and Team Spain combined.

Just look at that little jump she throws in at the end. Not unlike the pink tank top girl on those Shake Weight DVD’s, you can tell that she’s totally in on it.

If you’re reading this, girl in the white dress, please send all of your standard information (name, address, phone number, bra size, turn-ons, list of fears) to feedback@cagepotato.com so we can send you a conveniently altered CagePotato shirt and our congratulations on this historic achievement in UFC fan hotness immediately.

Now let’s just hope that Tom Lawlor doesn’t impersonate her at his next weigh-in.

-J. Jones

(If you were a guest on that gay Indian party bus and want to share your story, please e-mail tips@cagepotato.com.)

Thanks to everyone who submitted stories for today’s crowd-sourced edition of the CagePotato Roundtable. We’ve selected 12 tales from the pile — ranging from drama to comedy to horror — and we’ll begin with a story that comes to us from an actual pro fighter, involving one of MMA’s greatest out-of-the-cage rivalries…

Sal Woods
A few years ago I fought on the Strikeforce: Lawler vs. Shields card. While at weigh-ins I was obviously star-struck from being at Al Hrabosky’s with a room full of legends and badasses. The only guy I had the balls to say what’s up to was Nick Diaz. He was completely cool and super polite, he said hi and introduced himself to the entire table (my cornermen, shaking each one’s hand). We were just shooting the shit about how it was my first time on a big card and that I was fighting T-Wood. I was thinking this dude is nothing like the interviews I have watched.

All of a sudden he looks over and sees Joe Riggs and almost flips shit, starts telling his corner guys “there’s that little bitch right there!” Looks over a crowd of people and called Riggs a punk bitch. Then Gil and someone else walked him away/cooled him down. Proved that if Nick doesn’t like you and fights you he may fight you again in the hospital and almost again at completely different fight’s weigh-in!

Noah “Jewjifshoe” Ferreira

You guys all remember Dan Barrera from TUF 6, right? Well I met him during a math class in the Fall of 2011 and it was one of the weirdest experiences I’ve ever had.

(“I’ve never been knocked out in a fight and I’ve never been knocked out in training. But I’ve never been hurt the way that [Penn] hurt me.” / Photo via Las Vegas Sun)

By Matt Kaplan

Two weeks ago, Kenny Florian, the man who finished fights, announced that he is finished fighting.

Florian cited a November 2011 back injury and eventual numbness and tingling in his limbs as the impetus for closing the chapter of his life that’s been defined by five UFC Fight Night appearances, four weight classes, three UFC championship fights, two vicious elbows, and — lest we forget — one samurai costume.

As an undersized middleweight, Florian first appeared on our radars as the TUF 1 runner-up to Diego Sanchez in 2005, and after two victories at welterweight, Florian transformed his body and game, and established himself as one of the best lightweights in the world. Florian then made a brief run at featherweight in 2011, defeating Diego Nunes and losing to champion Jose Aldo, before announcing his retirement at the age of 36.

In a recent conversation with CagePotato.com — and in loving tribute to Ring Magazine’s “The Best I’ve Faced” feature — Ken-Flo looked back on his MMA career and remembered the opponents who stood out across a number of categories…

Fastest on his feet: I’d say Jose Aldo. He was the quickest. His explosiveness in general, his footwork, and his ability to move definitely are impressive.

Toughest chin: I remember hitting Sam Stout with hard shots. I hit him on the ground with a big bomb that connected real well, right on his chin, and he just ate it. And from seeing the rest of his fights, I see why. He’s got a real good chin.

(Hey, a win’s a win. / Image via Brett Rogers’s wiki page.)

For chaos-loving MMA fans, getting one over on Wikipedia is a mark of honor. This UG thread reminded us of the hilarious tradition of Wikipedia-page vandalism, so we decided to scour the Internet for some of our favorite MMA-related examples; thanks to all the anonymous men and women who quickly screen-capped these gems before they were fixed. Check out our full gallery of MMA wiki edits after the jump, and if we’ve left out any good ones, shoot us some links in the comments section.

(Look at it this way, it’s not like it could end any worse than the first time around.) 

Diego Sanchez has kind of become the Oprah of MMA. One minute he’s fat, the next he’s skinny, and in the moments between, he’s using a combination of over-the-top enthusiasm and divine right to help amass a cult following that consists of anyone within shouting distance. Perhaps it is ironic that the only fighter in UFC history to jump between more weight classes than Sanchez is the man he managed to beat for the TUF 1 middleweight plaque, Kenny Florian.

In either case, it looks like Diego’s most recent trip up to welterweight, which saw him go 2-2 (or 1-3 depending on how you viewed the Kampmann fight) will not be where the UFC’s go-to YES!! man will call home for long. In a recent interview with MMAJunkie.com, Sanchez stated that he is considering dropping back down to lightweight, because, you know, B.J. Penn is gone now. Fine, he didn’t state that directly, but we can read between the lines. Anyway, after undergoing surgery to fix a nagging shoulder injury, Sanchez feels 155 might become his new stomping grounds…again:

I really try to lift weights, but the shoulder injury sort of set me back. As I heal up, my body’s going to get a little smaller, so I might just go down to 155.

The last time I was at 155, I was just a wreck. Mentally, I was still young and partying a lot, and I was still smoking weed. I was just a wild child. Now that I’m grounded and have my life together and am married, I’m just focused. So maybe 155 might be a better weight for me.

Our question to Diego is: Why stop there? The flyweight division could sure use another contender that gives us the willies.

(In the heart of the child who made it, the Super HLUK belt is the most prestigious title on the planet.)

CagePotato Roundtable is our new recurring column in which the CP writing staff and some of our friends all get together to debate an MMA-related topic. Joining us this week is MiddleEasy.com founder Zeus Tipado, who was kind enough to smoke an entire bag of PCP and channel the spirit of Wallid Ismail. If you have a suggestion for a future Roundtable column, send it to tips@cagepotato.com. This week’s topic: Who’s your favorite MMA fighter to never win a major title?

Ben Goldstein

We take personality for granted these days. Everywhere you look, the MMA ranks are packed with shameless self-promoters, aspiring comedians, unrepentant assholes, and assorted clown-men. But in the UFC’s infancy, fighters tended to come in two types: Stoic (see Royce Gracie, Dan Severn) and certifiably insane ( see Joe Son, Harold Howard). David “Tank” Abbott changed all that. He entered the UFC with a fully-fledged persona, and managed to stay in character through his entire career. Simply put, he was the UFC’s first villain, and he played that role more effectively than anyone has since.

Heralded as a “pit fighter” — a term invented by UFC promoter Art Davie — Tank’s martial art of choice was hitting guys in the head really hard, which he did while wearing the sort of fingerless gloves that soon become industry standard. It’s difficult to overstate the impact that Tank’s debut at UFC 6 had on a 14-year-old Ben Goldstein as I was watching the pay-per-view at my friend Josh’s house. It wasn’t just that Abbott starched John Matua in a mere 18 seconds, or that Matua’s body seized up when his head hit the canvas. It’s that Tank reacted to the knockout by mimic-ing Matua’s stiffened pose. Tank actually mocked John Matua for having a seizure. Ruthless! And how about his destruction of Steve Nelmark at the Ultimate Ultimate ’96, which had to be the first “oh shit is that guy dead?” moment in UFC history. Tank was a living reminder that the UFC was very real, and very dangerous.

Photo Props: UFC.com

Even though FUEL TV is still unavailable to most Americans, the UFC been a consistent draw for the channel. When FUEL TV aired the preliminary fights from UFC on FX 1, it set a company ratings record with an average of 148,000 viewers. This number was almost matched by the prelims for UFC on FOX 2, which averaged 144,000.

With the ratings now in for the UFC’s first live card, Wednesday’s UFC on FUEL: Sanchez vs. Ellenberger, FUEL TV executives have to be impressed. The three hour broadcast averaged 217,000 viewers, with ratings peaking at 315,000 viewers during the evening’s main event. Also of note, the event landed FUEL TV’s ratings in the Top 10 for ad-supported cable networks among the 18-49 year old men demographic.

Not bad for a channel that most of the people reading this don’t get.

(Under Stockton rules, fights are judged by who moved forward the whole fight and the winner is the fighter who takes his opponent’s back in the final minutes of the bout.)

Shortly after the main event between Jake Ellenberger ended last night at UFC on FUEL, Nick Diaz took to his Twitter account to post a rare pair of tweets about the fight.

According to Nick, even though pretty much everyone else who saw the fight agreed that “The Juggernaut” took the decision, he believes that Diego “The Exorcist” won the fight. I guess Nick missed the counter-punching clinic that Jake put on, or maybe he’s still sore that he lost the fight to Condit even though he was the one moving forward like a Sherman tank the whole fight and in spite of the fact that Carlos landed more. Whatever his reasoning was, it’s unlikely that he’ll be called upon by NSAC or CSAC to fill in scorecards for them any time soon.

(The power of YES!! compels you! Check out some of the meme-worthy photoshops over at The UG.) 

Over the past week or so, the sports world has come down with a serious case of LINsanity, a disease that mimics the effects of Yellow Fever and is brought about by way of bereavement. Though it was the general consensus that this mind altering sickness originated with the uncanny rise of New York Knicks guard Jeremy Lin, last night’s inaugural UFC on FUEL event opened our collective eyes to the virus’ true host: Diego fucking Sanchez.

Yes, it seems that ever since Diego suffered his first professional losses, which came in back-to-back fashion at the hands of Josh Koscheck and Jon Fitch at UFC 69 and 76, the man has become consumed by a mixture of evangelical optimism and bipolar rage to the point of parody. As he made his way to the octagon for his main event clash with top contender Jake Ellenberger last night, it quickly became apparent that it was Sanchez who was in need of an exorcism, which made the Gregorian monk feel of his entrance appear all the more ironic.

(Between rounds he also drank holy water and said the Rosary.)

I had to check to make sure someone didn’t slip something into my drink when I saw that Diego was trying to perform an exorcism on Jake Ellenberger prior to their UFC on FUEL main event last night.

(Remember, the winner of this fight becomes the #2 contender for the UFC Intercontinental Temporary Welterweight Championship of the Midwest. So you’d better believe that Thiago Alves will be watching this one with great interest. / Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.com. For more photos from this set, click here.)

Tonight, the UFC will air their first-ever live fight card on FUEL TV — or so they say. Like most Americans, I don’t have the channel in my cable package, so I’m pretty much taking them for their word here. Luckily, our new liveblogger/boxing-analyst friend Steve Silverman does get the channel, and he’ll be handling play-by-play for the main card starting at 8 p.m. ET.

On the menu this evening: Balls-to-the-wall welterweight veteran Diego Sanchez will face Jake Ellenberger, who’s riding high off his 53-second knockout of Jake Shields. Plus, Stefan Struve puts his long limbs on a flamboyant high-school acting teacher, Stipe Miocic and Philip De Fries meet in a battle of undefeated heavyweight prospects, and TUF 14 bantamweight finalist TJ Dillashaw returns to action against Walel Watson. Total cost to the consumer: $0.00.

“UFC on FUEL 1: Sanchez vs. Ellenberger” results await you after the jump. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest. Thanks for being here, guys.

(Diego Sanchez is like the movie Inception: A dream inside of a nightmare inside two more dreams which are actually nightmares. Photos courtesy of MMAJunkie.com)

All fighters made weight at yesterday’s UFC on FUELTV weigh-ins, which seemed to sail by at a faster pace than normal. Maybe it was the lack of name power, or perhaps it was the absence of the usual drama and near brawls that we have become accustomed to over the past few weeks. In either case, it was a reserved, quiet evening for all participants involved. Except Diego Sanchez. He doesn’t do “reserved.”

Instead, we were treated to what appeared to be a night of MMA fighters mimicking the looks of pseudo-celebrities. Sean Loeffler came out posing as the singer from Crazy Town, making it rain on the audience like they were the 2 a.m. shift at Scores, and Jonathan Brookins stuck with the Geico Caveman look that has gotten him some fine honeys up to this point. But the most bizarre shift in appearance undoubtedly went to Dave Herman, who pulled off Neil Fallon TO PERFECTION.*

(BANG BANG BANG BANG! VAMANOS VAMANOS!)

Join us after the jump for the full weigh in video and results.

(Remind me to ask Diego for a small loan during fight week.)

Love him or hate him, Diego Sanchez is an exciting fighter who brings it each and every time he’s in the cage. What is most polarizing about him is that most fans think that he’s a really strange dude. From his stevia experimentation,”Yes!” mantra, cartwheels and his denial that he may have lost a fight to his recent call-out of his teammate Carlos Condit, it’s an understatement to say that the TUF winner marches to the beat of a different drummer, but that’s part of his appeal.

The fighter formerly known as “The Nightmare” (sorry, I’m not calling him “The Dream”) takes on Jake Ellenberger tonight at UFC on FUEL 1, so we figured we’d take a look back at some of his GIF-worthy moments the past few years.

Check out the other 10 after the jump.

Some selected highlights from our friends around the MMA blogosphere…

-  Marijuana is Not a Performance-Enhancing Drug, It’s Simply Illegal (5th Round)

- UFC on FUEL TV Weigh-In Photos Gallery for ‘Ellenberger vs Sanchez’ on Feb. 14 in Omaha (MMA Mania)

- My First Fight: Diego Sanchez (MMA Fighting)

- Bader Not Intimidated to Face Rampage in Japan (FightLine)

- Image Matters: UFC Business & Media Politics  (MMA Payout)

- Mac Danzig Just Received His ‘Mix Marshal Arts’ license from the DC Athletic Commission (MiddleEasy)

- Britney Palmer Interview (BleacherReport.com/MMA)

- Tim Sylvia: I Can Beat 80 Percent of the Heavyweights in the UFC (Lowkick.Blitzcorner.com)

- Johny Hendricks: The Bigger the Fight, the Bigger I Come Out (Five Ounces of Pain)

-  Joe Rogan Thinks Weed is a Performance Enhancing Drug (MMA Convert)

-  A Fight Nerd’s Betting Guide: UFC on FUEL Edition (The Fight Nerd)

-  Is There a need for MMA Managers? (Fight Opinion)

(I guess someone forgot to tell the design team at FUEL that Struve is the taller one.)

Just a friendly reminder that we’ll have the live video stream for the UFC On FUEL: Sanchez vs. Ellenberger weigh-ins for you and your Valentine to watch at 5:00 pm ET tonight. If you’re at home and you’re one of the 17 people who subscribe to FUEL TV, you can watch it on your flat screen.

Will Diego Sanchez spit on Jake Ellenberger’s forehead while he shouts “yes” during the staredown? Will anyone mistake Dave Herman for Macho Man? Will he slam Stefan Struve? Does anyone plan on tuning into the prelims?

These questions and more will be answered after the jump (or in the comment section).

(Today’s required viewing: “Fight Factory” goes deep inside the world of American Kickboxing Academy. Props to nuvoTV via BloodyElbow. Skip to the 12:43 mark to see Phil Baroni’s infamous bodybuilding video get a different reaction than he was looking for.)

Some selected highlights from our friends around the MMA blogosphere…

- Daniel James Miller’s Kidney Transplant on Hold (MMA Fighting)

- It’s a Wonderful Life: Phil Davis UFC on FOX 2 Interview Exclusive (MMA Mania)

- Will the Real Chael Sonnen Please Stand Up: Inside the Contender’s Training Camp (BleacherReport.com/MMA)

- Demian Maia Talks Silva vs. Sonnen, Says Chris Weidman Is “The Real Deal” (Lowkick.Blitzcorner.com)

- The Karate Hottie Pulled Off a Slick Rear-Naked Choke Last Night and Here’s the Video (MiddleEasy)

- Jon Jones: “Rashad’s Chin Sucks” (Five Ounces of Pain)

- UFC Issues Statement Regarding UFC.com Hackers (5th Round)

- Great Wrestling Moments in MMA History (MMA Convert)

- Culinary Union Attacks UFC on Fox 2 Show With New Anti-MMA Website (The Fight Nerd)

- ESPN’s John Barr on UFC Pay Report Blowback: “It’s Not Our Charge to Do Your Public Relations” (Fight Opinion)

- Diego Sanchez Predicts All-Out War With Jake Ellenberger (FightLine)

- HDNet to Be Rebranded as AXS TV (MMA Payout)

(By the end of his war with Kampmann, Diego Sanchez had suffered a split lip, two slashed-up eyes, and a complete loss of body hair.)

According to reports on MMAJunkie and Heavy, the UFC will be holding an event in Omaha, Nebraska, on February 15th, headlined by a promising welterweight contest between Diego Sanchez and Jake Ellenberger. It will be the UFC’s first broadcast on the cable channel FUEL TV as part of the promotion’s new television deal with FOX Networks.

Sanchez has scored decision wins in his last two fights against Paulo Thiago and Martin Kampmann, both of which earned him Fight of the Night awards. Though his matchup with Ellenberger was originally rumored to take place at UFC 141 on December 30th, Sanchez needed a little more time to recover from a broken hand, which he sustained shortly before his scheduled UFC 135 meeting with Matt Hughes.

(Look into my crystal ball Kenny, and ye shall see thine future.) 

There is a lot on the line at UFC 136. Not just the two titles and the future title match implications, but a chance for two men to finally capture the gold that has long eluded them. I’m speaking of Kenny Florian and Gray Maynard of course, who’ve both been chasing UFC gold for the better part of their careers, only to fall inches short of the finish line. For Gray, who many people felt deserved a title shot over current champion Frankie Edgar in the first place, it was the resilience of the champ that proved to be his undoing. And for Florian, it was just a terribly unlucky spell when it came to title fights. But come Saturday, both men will have a chance to erase our doubts and finally move up to that deluxe apartment in the sky.

Unfortunately, Florian and Maynard are not the only men who have felt the repercussions of looking directly into the belt. There are a few guys out there who just seem destined to be number 2 in a company that loves to fuck with the number 2. Anyway, we thought we would awkwardly point out six of them, excluding “Kenflo” and “The Bully,” from across the room for your reading pleasure. And we’re going by Brock Lesnar rules here, so interim belts don’t count. Enjoy.

Let’s be honest, there weren’t many of us out there biting our nails in anticipation of Mac Danzig vs. Matt Wiman Part II in the weeks leading up to it, but boy were we wrong. The rematch, which took home Fight of the Night Honors, was a back and forth, blood soaked brawl, and we loved every second of it. So it is in light of their triumph that we present you, Potato Nation, with five rematches, in no particular order, that we can expect to see as soon as Joe Silva starts returning our calls.

5. Carlos Condit vs. Rory Macdonald

Depending on how well Carlos Condit does in his upcoming title fight against GSP, the possibility of seeing these two welterweight brutes tangle again seems pretty high. Both have been on a tear as of late, and the first fight between them was nothing short of extraordinary.

(“What is he doing with his face? Is that supposed to intimidate me?”)

According to a report by MMAMatrix.com, a welterweight match-up between Jake Ellenberger and Diego Sanchez is in the works for UFC 141 December 30 in Las Vegas.

Ellenberger leapfrogged to the front of the line of UFC welterweight contenders with his first-round knockout of Jake Shields at UFC Fight Night: Shields vs. Ellenberger two weeks ago. As such, it’s likely that the winner of the bout, if it happens, will be second in line behind Nick Diaz to face the winner of the UFC 137 showdown between Georges St-Pierre and Carlos Condit on October 29.

(…and THAT’S what the Kos has cookin’.”

When Josh Koscheck mentioned back in July that he was interested in taking at least one fight at 185, speculation ran rampant about who the American Kickboxing Academy fighter wanted to face. We reported that there were early discussions with the UFC and Chris Leben’s camp for the two The Ultimate Fighter nemeses to square off at UFC 138 in San Jose, but the fight never materialized for various reasons and now Koscheck is slated to face former UFC welterweight champ Matt Hughes at UFC 135 on September 24 as a last-minute replacement for Diego Sanchez.

According to Kos, he asked for either Leben, Rich Franklin or Wanderlei Silva for his first bout back since losing to Georges St-Pierre at UFC 124. A broken orbital bone he suffered in the opening minutes of the bout required surgery and left him sidelined for the better part of the past year. The reason for the jump back up to middleweight — the class he competed in on The Ultimate Fighter — he says was because anyone of relevance in his own weight class was already tied up.

According to former UFC welterweight champion Matt Hughes he has accepted the challenge of Josh Koscheck to face him in the place of his original UFC 135 opponent Diego Sanchez, who pulled out of the bout due to a broken hand. The only problem is, the UFC brass haven’t decided whether they want to see “Country Breakfast” possibly have his lights and his career turned out by Kos or have Bob Arum telling Dana, “I told you so!” until the day he dies (some time soon by the looks of it) thanks to a potential 15-minute wrestlefuck session with Jon Fitch.

Either way, Hughes is fighting on September 24, so at least there’s that.

(Listen to the first thing that Diego says in this video. Is it just me, or is the dude starting to sound like Kevin from ‘The Office’?)

Less than three weeks before his scheduled meeting with Matt Hughes at UFC 135: Jones vs. Rampage (September 24th, Denver), Diego Sanchez was pulled from the event yesterday due to a broken hand suffered in training. Coming off back-to-back decision victories over Paulo Thiago and Martin Kampmann — both of which netted him Fight of the Night awards — Sanchez released a statement explaining just how bummed he is:

“I am heartbroken that I have to inform MMA fans that I cannot fight Matt Hughes at UFC 135 later this month. I have never physically felt more prepared to compete than I felt for this fight, which makes this even more painful for me. While I do not know right now when I will return, I want to assure all of the fans out there that I will be back in the Octagon as soon as I am 100-percent healthy.”

But in the distance, a savior appears…

In: “I WANT MY BELT BACK!” Out: “There’s gone be some black on black crime.” VidProps: UFC/YouTube

Check this out: official UFC propaganda would have us believe that Rampage Jackson is actually out there somewhere working. They even have the nerve to pause on a calendar square labeled “JIU JITSU”, when we all know damn well that ‘Page would pull guard right after he lets someone hold an umbrella for him.

On the other hand, we’re pretty sure we’ve found the guy shooting footage of Jackson and passing it on to Jones.

Bones v Rampage goes down in just 22 days, and there’s plenty of action to keep you occupied until then.

The full UFC 135 card is after the jump.