Steroids in MMA
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Tag: Dude Wipes

CagePotato.com Presents: The 2014 Potato Awards


(We tried to give the Potato Awards a classier vibe this year. We failed.)

By the CagePotato Staff

Look, you already know how we feel about MMA awards ceremonies: They’re meaningless exercises tainted by personal bias and stupidity, in equal measures. The only thing that makes the Potato Awards different is that we’re completely honest about the fact that our awards are biased and stupid. But it’s the end of the year, and we have to acknowledge that somehow, right?

Putting together this year’s Potato Awards list was a harrowing experience. Honestly, 2014 was an awful year for mixed martial arts. It was the year that the UFC’s pay-per-view business tanked due to injured stars and general disinterest among fans — what else is new, amirite? — while competing promotions stooped to terrifying depths in order to get your attention. (Not that the UFC didn’t do some of that, too.) 2014 answered the question “Could the UFC survive an entire year without Anderson Silva and GSP?”, and that answer was “yes, but just barely.” It was also a year in which domestic violence incidents involving MMA fighters became a tragic recurring theme (see: War Machine, Thiago Silva, Josh Grispi, Anthony Johnson, Michael Johnson).

But years from now, we may look back at 2014 as an important turning point, thanks to some major developments that took place near the end of the year. Notably, the UFC’s Reebok uniform deal is poised to transform the sponsorship landscape, while the Le/Quarry/Fitch class-action lawsuit and the related suits that came out in its wake could drag out some long-hidden truths about the UFC’s finances. We don’t yet know if these developments will turn out to be good or bad overall, but MMA could be a lot more interesting in 2015.

As we enter a new year, let’s look back at the past 12 months that got us here — the highs, the lows, and the moments that were so “WTF?!” that they defy all judgment. Use the page links below to peruse our mostly-chronological list of 38 award categories, and thanks so much for sticking with CagePotato for another year.

Page 1: Comeback Fight of the Year, The Steve Nelmark Memorial “Is He Dead?” Award, MMA Screen-Caps of the Year, “Just Bleed” MMA Superfan of the Year Award

Page 2: Worst Performance in a Drug Test, The Cecil Peoples Shittiest Decision of the Year Award, Worst Event of the Year, Sponsor of the Year

Page 3: Submission of the Year, MMA GIF of the Year, Worst Fight of the Year, Most Embarrassing Knockout of the Year

Page 4: Greatest Unsanctioned Fight of the Year, Catchphrase of the Year, The Krazy Horse Bennett Arrest of the Year Award, Greatest Fight Canceled Due to Injury, Best Reference to Medieval Europe in MMA

Page 5: Knockout of the Year, Photo of the Year, Media Shill of the Year, Most Awkward Interview, Most Satisfying Beatdown

Page 6: The Gilbert Yvel Award for Outstanding Creativity in a Cheating Performance, Greatest Hype Inflation, Best Use of Social Media, Best MMA Personality Appearance in a Non-MMA Setting

Page 7: Most Bizarre News Story of the Year, The “Really? You’re Just Gonna Keep Doing That Shit That Gets You in All That Trouble?” Award a.k.a. “The Koppenhaver”, Best Event of the Year, The Minowaman Freak Show Hall of Fame Award

Page 8: Gnarliest Injury of the Year, Greatest Failed Propaganda of The Year, Worst Use of Social Media, MMA Fail of the Year

Page 9: Most Terrifying Game-Changer, Fight of the Year, “WTF?” Moment of the Year, Promotion of the Year

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Dude Wipes: The Definitive CagePotato Review


(Unboxing the care package Dude Wipes sent CagePotato. Thanks, Dude Products!)

By Matt Saccaro

The MMA world peered at Tyron Woodley‘s ass and saw “DUDE WIPES” emblazoned across his most private chasm. In that moment, an MMA meme was born.

Dude Wipes, in some ways, are the ultimate expression of the ridiculous Dude-Bro culture ingrained in MMA–or that marketers think is ingrained in MMA. Whether through derision, revulsion, or legitimate curiosity, Dude Wipes became one of the top trends on Twitter during the fights. While some were happy to simply laugh at Dude Wipes and write them off as some kind of oddity, CagePotato wanted to know more. Myself and everyone else on the CagePotato editorial staff will never let it be said we won’t go to any heights (or depths) to the get stories that matter most to MMA. Dude Wipes, we believed, was one of those stories.

Thus, I went out to Walgreens and Target the morning after UFC 174, but found no Dude Wipes. Dejected, I resorted to making a post about them citing several Amazon reviews. But fate tossed me a life preserver in the shape of a Dude Wipe. Dude Products, makers of Dude Wipes, found out about my dilemma and hooked me up. I was excited to get my hands (and butt cheeks) on some Dude Wipes. Check them out:

I also got two wristbands that say “Fresh ass dude” and “#DudeWipes” on them; they’re shown in the video.

So how did they measure up to my expectations? Find out after the jump.

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Let’s Talk About Dude Wipes for a Minute (or Several Minutes)


(“Official sponsor of Tyron Woodley at UFC 174 (logo on the ass, of course)” / Photo via DudeProducts.com)

If you missed UFC 174 last night, count yourself lucky. It was a terrible card that saw fans literally flocking out of the arena in droves before the main event–a fight where flyweight champ Demetrious Johnson defended his belt against Ali Bagautinov–even ended.

But there was one saving grace: Dude Wipes.

No, really. Tyron Woodley had an ad for Dude Wipes plastered on his ass (which was intentional placement by Dude Products, makers of Dude Wipes). Within minutes, “Dude Wipes” was trending worldwide on Twitter. What, pray tell, is a Dude Wipe? Here’s the story, according to the founders:

Whether it was some unexpected physical activity or the aftermath of the lunchtime burrito, we realized, as guys, we are destined to smell. Something needed to be done. So on behalf of Dudekind [Editor's note: Ugh] we created The Award Winning Dude Wipes™ to combat stank and put you back on your game wherever or whenever nature calls. 

If you’re still wiping with just toilet paper, you’re a chump and your ass hates you for it. Any red-blooded American knows Dude Wipes™ are something you never leave the crib without.

Dude Products even created some promotional material:

Being the disheveled, grubby, low-minded, basement dwelling neckbeards we are, Dude Wipes sounded right up our alley! We wanted to buy a pack of the dudeliest wipes on Earth and review them for all MMA fans. Alas, after making a perilous trek through Father’s Day traffic to FOUR separate stores, we couldn’t find any (and we weren’t asking a clerk to check for fucking Dude Wipes).

So instead of reviewing them ourselves, we’re going to post reviews from Amazon–both positive and negative.

Let’s start it off with the most glowing reviews…

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