(“I don’t mean to freak you out, Terry, but there’s a bee on your nose. Now if you just hold still…I’m gonna try something here.”) 

As if UFC 162 wasn’t already stacked enough, word broke earlier today that a lightweight matchup between John Makdessi and Edson Barboza has been booked for the event as well. Set to transpire on Fourth of July weekend, UFC 162 not only feature the much-anticipated middleweight title fight between Anderson Silva and Chris Weidman, but a trio of ridiculously awesome featherweight fights and yes, the return of Dave Herman.

After suffering his only career defeat in one of the greatest upsets of 2012 (via TKO to Jamie Varner), Barboza recently rebounded with a first round TKO of Lucas “Why me, God, WHY?!” Martins at UFC on FX 7. Currently 3-2 in the octagon, Makdessi has been able to right the course in his past two fights, bouncing back from a two fight skid with UD victories over Sam Stout and Daron Cruickshank.

We don’t mean to overhype it, but this fight has all the ingredients for a end of the night bonus at the minimum and a FOTY nomination at best. And what’s the only way to make a great fight even better? That’s right, a drinking game. Here are the rules we will be playing by during Makdessi/Barboza:

1. For every attempted spinning backfist/kick, take a drink.
2. For every landed spinning whatchamacallit, take two drinks.
3. If Mike Goldberg mentions “the slapping sound” made by a leg kick, finish your beer.
4. If Rogan informs Goldberg (for the billionth time) shortly thereafter that the best leg kicks are the ones that make no sound, shout out your favorite Goldbergism and take a shot.
5. If it ends in a knockout/TKO, finish your beer.
6. If Joe Rogan completely loses his sh*t during the fight (ala Boetsch/Okami), take a bong rip, finish your beer, and Ezekiel choke the person closest to you.

Check out the crazy lineup for UFC 162 after the jump. 

Before I was a writer here at CagePotato, some of my favorite columns to read were the “New Guys” features devoted entirely to familiarizing us with the unfamiliar faces sprinkled throughout the average UFC card. It made the preliminary action far more exciting in my opinion, and more importantly made me look like less an MMA fan, more a prophet when making picks against my friends on fight night. I would of course plead ignorance after I had successfully transferred their money into my wallet, but hey, that’s what they get for saying “This Cyprus Diabetes guy is going to get straight up murdered by Luiz Cane.”

So to begin a year in which 95 or so percent of scheduled UFC fights will likely be cancelled due to injury, we figured we would brush off this old feature moving forward, if only to brief you on the no-namers who will inevitably be stepping in on short notice to replace our plagued MMA stars. Today’s edition focuses on the upcoming UFC on FX 7 card headlined by Michael Bisping vs. Vitor Belfort, and features a pair of dangerous, well-rounded sluggers hailing from, you guessed it, Brazil. Funny how that always seems to be the case.

(Sad. He was so young.) 

Not too long ago, I wrote a piece about six of the worst possible opponents debuting UFC fighters have drawn in the past. As I predicted, it was almost universally panned by you Taters, but if I could update the article today, a feller by the name of Lucas “Mineiro” — which I can only assume means “Marked for Death” in Portuguese – Martins would be included somewhere on that list. Because now that Justin Salas has withdrawn from his UFC on FX 7 fight with Edson Barboza, the UFC’s matchmaking department has thrown the poor bastard pictured above into the octagon on short notice in Salas’ place (for his UFC debut, no less), presumably with a steak tied around his neck and a guaranteed bed at the nearest hospital.

Martins record may currently stand at a perfect 10-0, but the combined record of his opponents is just 27-24. Adding to that is the fact that he’ll be taking on an Edson Barboza that is on the heels of his first professional loss and will likely be looking to reestablish himself as one of the top lightweights via Martins’ untimely destruction. So yeah, expect this one to go down in roughly the same fashion as the Anglo-Zanzibar War or Michael Bisping on his prom night, which is to say, quickly.

We’re about to win at IRONY!

TOP SCORE!!!

We should probably feel sad about the fact that we live in a country where people get more passionate about voting for the winner of a reality show than they do for voting for their school board representatives. Or that many of you have probably quoted “the Founding Fathers™” inaccurately in a typo-ridden Facebook rant at some point in your lives. Or that many of you don’t know when this year’s presidential election is, yet have already voted for the awards we’re about to shamelessly plug.

But if we did that, then we might miss out on one of these fighters winning an ESPY. We wouldn’t want that, would we? Didn’t think so.

(Mike Tyson, Urijah Faber, and Snoop Dogg discuss the influence of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu. Props: RootsofFight. From now until Sunday, you can get 15% off their new Helio Gracie shirt — or anything else in their store — by entering Coupon code FD2012JB when you check out.)

-  Knockout of the Half-Year: Edson Barboza Banishes Terry Etim to a Lifetime Highlight Reel (MMAFighting)

- Scoring Error Corrected for UFC on FX 3; Mike Pierce Now Unanimous Decision Victor (MMAWeekly)

- ‘Shogun’ Rua Says He Would ‘Gain Nothing’ Fighting Glover Teixeira (Fightline)

- Brett Rogers Says House Fire Sparked Rift With Bellator 71 Opponent Kevin Asplund (MMAJunkie)

- Between Choices and Chance, the UFC Has Spread Itself Too Thin (BleacherReport/MMA)

- Three Exercises to Build ‘Dad Strength’ (MensFitness)

- The Ultimate Runway Model Fails Compilation (WorldWideInterweb)

- Kevin Durant’s Top 10 Plays For The 2012 Season (TurdFergusonBlog)

- How to Spend Your Lottery Winnings (HolyTaco)

- Girl on Girls: Sex Advice From a Woman (MadeMan)

(The fact that Aldama’s feet look something like this surely didn’t help matters.) 

My God. As if it wasn’t crazy enough that CP reader Jason Jenkins was able to pull off that insane tilt-a-whirl KO just last week, now this shit happens. Matter of fact, while we’re naming knockouts after carnival rides, we’d like to be the first to officially dub this baby, which took place at Total Gym Peleas Amateur Chapo Challenger 1 in Mexico last weekend, “The Scrambler.” Not only because it certainly scrambled the brains of it’s recipient, Esteban Santillanez, for quite some time, but also because the kick looked like it was thrown by a man who forgot to buckle his safety harness on the aforementioned ride.

Christian Aldama is the man behind the incredible kick, which awaits you after the jump.

(Props to CP reader Jason Jenkins for delivering both the video and the knockout-to-end -all-CP-reader-knockouts.) 

We’ve only said this once in the history of CagePotato, but thank God for Facebook. If not for this social networking device, we would have never come across CP reader Jason Jenkins’ incredible knockout that occurred over the weekend at Ultimate Impact K1 in Gloucester, Massachusetts.

The video, which Jenkins passed along to us just a couple of hours ago, features the “Grasshopper” going full on Edson Barboza on his opponent, Phill Savage, delivering an incredible spinning wheel kick KO less than a minute into their fight. The fact that he throws an extra spin into his kick for good measure makes the knockout all the more impressive. Seriously, it is probably the coolest finish we’ve seen since Cairo Rocha’s Capoeira style destruction of Francisco Neves back in December of 2011.

The brutiful KO awaits you after the jump. 

It may be an all heavyweight main card, but the bantamweight is stealing the show. Props: MMAFighting.com

We’re just hours away from UFC 146, so it’s time to turn on FX and watch the preliminary card. This evening’s all heavyweight main card will kick off with the lighter guys, as Diego Brandao makes his first post-TUF appearance against Darren Elkins, Dan Hardy and Mayhem Miller fight for their careers against Duane Ludwig and C.B. Dollaway, and Edson Barboza takes on Jamie Varner in what may potentially be the squash match/upset of the year. Handling tonight’s liveblogging duties will be Seth Falvo, who will be frantically checking to see if his beloved Philadelphia 76ers can take Game Seven during commercial breaks. Come in after the jump for live play-by-play.

(Just don’t come between Dave and his cubs.)

A pair of injuries have led to even more changes to the already chaotic UFC 146 lineup. As confirmed last night, heavyweight Gabriel Gonzaga has been forced to withdraw from his scheduled fight against Roy Nelson, and will be replaced by Dave Herman, who suffered a TKO loss to Stefan Struve in his last Octagon appearance. This is the second opponent switch for Nelson, who was originally supposed to face Antonio Silva on the “Dos Santos vs. Mir” card.

Meanwhile in the prelims, lightweight contender Evan Dunham is out of his fight against undefeated rising star Edson Barboza, and will be replaced by former WEC champ Jamie Varner. Since exiting the WEC after going 0-3-1 in 2010, Varner has won three of four fights outside the Zuffa fold, most recently stopping Drew Fickett in 40 seconds at XFC 16. However, all of Varner’s recent fights have come at 160-170 pounds, and one of those matches resulted in a loss to Dakota Cochrane, of all people. Will Varner be at a disadvantage trying to make 155 again on short notice? Will it even matter, considering that Barboza vs. Varner is the biggest UFC squash match of the year?

UFC 146 goes down May 26th at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas. The current (but probably not final) lineup is after the jump…

If you’re like most people, you neglect your legs when you go to the gym, preferring to focus on your GMs. Edson Barboza is not most people. The undefeated UFC lightweight — who returns at UFC 146 against Evan Dunham on May 26th — understands that it requires intense cultivation to turn your legs into tools of destruction. Fortunately, JiuJitsuMania.com has just released a video with Barboza’s strength and conditioning coach Joe Mullings that runs down his 45-minute leg routine. Follow these seven steps, and soon you’ll achieve the “suddenness” required to do this to somebody’s face. Here we go…

1. Deep squats with IronMind belt (5 sets of 12 reps), which looks uncomfortably similar to this.

2. Single-legged step-ups (5 sets of 12 reps)

3. 30-pound medicine ball 21′s (5 sets); a “21″ set consists of seven reps in the bottom half of the range of motion, seven reps in the top half of the range of motion, then seven reps of the full exercise.

(In Brazil, it’s customary to destroy your own cornermen with flying knees after an impressive victory.)

With a flawless 10-0 record, three Fight of the Night awards, and a legendary spinning wheel-kick knockout of Terry Etim in his last performance, Brazilian lightweight Edson Barboza is arguably the greatest undefeated prospect on the UFC’s roster. And he’ll be going for his fifth win in the Octagon on May 26th, when he faces Evan Dunham at UFC 146 in Las Vegas. UFC president Dana White confirmed the pairing yesterday via Twitter.

Dunham, who was a much-hyped undefeated prospect himself at one time, is back on the upswing after compiling back-to-back victories against Shamar Bailey and Nik Lentz, which snapped a two-fight losing streak. Dunham’s biggest advantage against Barboza should be on the mat, but if he can’t get the fight there, he’ll be in for a long, painful night, full of feet flying at his face and shins slamming into his thighs. Anybody think Evan can derail the Edson Barboza hype-train?

Related: Mayhem to Be Given Another Shot Against C.B. Dollaway at UFC 146

(Igor Vovchanchyn vs. Francisco Bueno @ PRIDE 8, 11/21/99. Josh Barnett makes the tree-analogy at the 0:41 mark.)

Edson Barboza‘s spinning heel-kick knockout of Terry Etim at UFC 142 wasn’t just an instant-classic because of the technique itself — it was also unforgettable because of the devastating effect it had on Etim, who stiffened up and toppled straight to the mat in slow motion like a felled spruce. The “falling tree” knockout is a rare, brutal moment in combat sports that always gets a rise out of fans. Here are nine of our favorite examples from MMA fights, in no particular order.

(Edson Barboza vs. Terry Etim @ UFC 142, 1/14/12)

(Face, you are a scary. / Photo via FOX Sports)

By Mark Dorsey
One final recap of Saturday night’s UFC 142: Aldo vs. Mendes event, Clint Eastwood-style.

The Good
• Edson Barboza‘s astounding spinning heel kick knockout of Terry Etim. Mike Goldberg might have been exaggerating a bit when he called it “maybe the most spectacular knockout in UFC history,” but it’s certainly the early front-runner for Greatest Knockout of 2012. And props to Joe Rogan for immediately recalling Baraboza’s prior use of the kick against Anthony Njokuani. As Rogan mentioned, it’s an under-utilized technique that we may start to see come in-vogue in 2012, much like the crane kick in 2011.

• Gabriel Gonzaga needed a good performance to provoke any sort of excitement in his return to the UFC’s heavyweight division. Even sweeter than his early finish was his proclamation that we can expect to see him return to the submission base that generated so much interest in his first run at UFC contention.

• After two highly energetic Brazilian shows within a year, the UFC has found its most passionate and dedicated audience. The crowd at the HSBC Arena in Rio de Janeiro was loud, enthusiastic, and everything one would expect from a bunch of rowdy Brazilian fight fans. There was a good amount of variation in the chants throughout the night — from “U.S.A., to “Thiago,” to the famous soccer anthem “ole ole ole” — and a surreal crowd-surfing celebration from defending featherweight champion Jose Aldo capped off the incredible fan involvement.

Behold: a shining example of “kick face“. (Photo: UFC.com)

Brazilian fans are credited with being the most raucous audience in the world, and last night’s fighters gave them plenty to cheer about. Six of the nine bouts ended via knock out or submission*, with five of those stoppages coming in the first round.

Chokes, knees, and even a spinning wheel kick punctuated last night’s fights (*as did a controversial referee stoppage). Pop on in for a motion picture tribute to UFC 142.

As always, praise be to Zombie Prophet.

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The People’s Champion, showing Chael Sonnen how it’s done. Props: @CopperHeartCT

With the UFC’s quick return to Rio de Janeiro, the promotion had high expectations to live up to. Their last visit saw a nearly perfect performance from one of the sport’s most dominant champions, a local favorite earning a quick finish, and (most) Brazilian fighters outmatching their foreign opponents on their ways to victory. It was going to be difficult to entertain the local fans the same way that UFC 134 did, yet the UFC’s return to Brazil netted nearly identical results.

Heading into his title defense against Chad Mendes last night, critics were starting to say that Jose Aldo was beginning to coast his way through fights. That the fight finisher fans grew to love in the WEC had been replaced by a fighter content to go through the motions en route to a decision victory. In front of his home country, Aldo made an impressive statement by finishing “Money” Mendes in the first round.

Mendes displayed improved striking, but that means little when facing the lethal limbs of Jose Aldo. To win this fight–or even stay competitive–Mendes needed to put the champion on his back, yet time and time again his best efforts were thwarted. Though Aldo blatantly grabbed the fence to prevent one takedown, a follow-up attempt from the same position seconds later barely took his feet off the ground. Had he been deducted one point- or ten- it’s hard to imagine the fight going any other way. The brilliant takedown defense and impeccable timing he showed throughout the bout were on full display in the closing seconds of round one. Aldo’s transition to the fight ending knee was nothing short of perfection, something only a dominant striker of his caliber could dream of pulling off.

“I’m not even kidding you, man! It must have been four feet of linguiça. And ‘Humble’ ate the whole thing, just now backstage!” (Photo: UFC.com)

It’s 1 AM in Rio De Janeiro and and the locals have turned out in droves to cheer on their countrymen and wish death upon foreigners. It may not be very sporting of them, but we’ve pretty much thrown professionalism out the window this weekend.

Is Mendes the right Alpha Male to topple Aldo in his own backyard? Does Belfort have enough power to put away one of the UFC’s top heavyweights? And will Palhares’s overwhelming desire to tear limbs apart overcome his instinct to stop fighting in the middle of a bout?

Come join me, Chris Colemon, inside for the answers to these questions and more.

(Edson Barboza uglies up Ross Pearson during his split-decision victory over the TUF 9 winner at UFC 134.)

By Anton Gurevich

This Saturday night, Edson Barboza will head to his native country of Brazil to take on English submission specialist Terry Etim at UFC 142 from the HSBC Arena in Rio de Janeiro. Quickly emerging as one of the lightweight division’s brightest young prospects, Barboza will look to extend his current undefeated streak to 10-0, with hopes of solidifying his place in the UFC’s stacked 155-pound title mix.

A product of The Armory Training Center in Florida, Barboza made his professional debut in 2009, reeling off six consecutive victories and capturing the Ring of Combat lightweight title before signing with the UFC in 2010. Utilizing crippling leg-kicks and precision striking, the Brazilian dispatched of Mike Lullo via TKO in his Octagon debut, which he followed up with back-to-back “Fight of the Night” performances against Anthony Njokuani and Ross Pearson to improve his UFC mark to 3-0.

Now just days ahead of what will be his second homecoming in less than six-months, LowKick.com had an opportunity to speak with Barboza about this weekend’s match-up. Here’s what he had to say about his training at The Armory, his title aspirations, and how his striking stacks up against other UFC lightweights.

READ THE INTERVIEW ON LOWKICK.BLITZCORNER.COM!

(Don’t be fooled by its innocent exterior, the Stout will knock you out quicker than you can say “10.6 percent.”) 

A pair of lightweight contests have recently been announced for the UFC’s return to Brazil this January. Fresh off his lightning quick victory over Edward Faaloloto at UFC 138, Terry Etim will be taking a big step up in competition when he faces Brazilian phenom Edson Barboza.

Barboza has gone 3-0 in his UFC career, notching wins over TUF 9 winner Ross Pearson and WEC KO artist Anthony Njokuani. Etim, on the other hand, had rattled off four victories in his last five fights before being sidelined by a rib injury for over a year. Having fought six of his nine UFC contests on his home soil, it will be interesting to see how Etim reacts to the foreign crowd, especially one that has shown the capacity to commit bloodshed before.

Let’s be honest, there weren’t many of us out there biting our nails in anticipation of Mac Danzig vs. Matt Wiman Part II in the weeks leading up to it, but boy were we wrong. The rematch, which took home Fight of the Night Honors, was a back and forth, blood soaked brawl, and we loved every second of it. So it is in light of their triumph that we present you, Potato Nation, with five rematches, in no particular order, that we can expect to see as soon as Joe Silva starts returning our calls.

5. Carlos Condit vs. Rory Macdonald

Depending on how well Carlos Condit does in his upcoming title fight against GSP, the possibility of seeing these two welterweight brutes tangle again seems pretty high. Both have been on a tear as of late, and the first fight between them was nothing short of extraordinary.

By Jason Moles

After a spectacular night of fights at UFC 134 in Rio, we’re going to try to make sense of it with a little game called ‘Buy, Sell, or Hold’. I’ll take a fighter and either buy, sell, or hold him like a stockbroker would. (It’s kind of like the real stock market, except you won’t want to throw yourself off a building afterwards.) Take my advice and you’ll end up with a nice MMA portfolio. Without further ado…

Anderson Silva: Buy! Buy! Buy!

‘The Spider‘ has everything you’d want from a blue chip stock: an x-factor that makes people want to see him fight, major corporate sponsors, and hilarious commercials. Oh yeah, and his fighting isn’t that bad either. Silva’s complete and utter domination of Yushin Okami at UFC 134 just reinforces what we already knew — we are witnessing the greatest fighter of all time every time he steps inside the Octagon™.

Yushin Okami: Dump it like your autographed picture of Carrot Top.

He is currently ranked as the #3 best Middleweight and yet it seems all for naught. Okami showed up to a gunfight with a pair of flip-flops and a bag of Skittles against Silva. Despite working with the only man to dominate the champion, he never once came close to showing a spark in Brazil. I have a feeling he’ll face the same fate as Jon Fitch while his stock becomes more cursed than Monster.

I know this hurts right now, Big Nog, but it will all be worth it in a minute. (Pic: UFC.com)

UFC 134 was the outfit’s first return to Brazil in thirteen years, and with plans for four more Brazil-based events in 2012, Zuffa needed to make a lasting impression. The fighters delivered, big time, and for their efforts three of them walked away with a cool $100,000 bonus in their pockets. That’s a lot of Bony Acai.

Much was made of the homecoming to Rio, Royce Gracie’s home, the birthplace of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Yet in the land that helped transform hyper-extending limbs into an art form, there wasn’t a single submission landed. Brazilian fighters have evolved just like the rest of them, and last night they chose to showcase their fists.