(Thiago Santos has no doubt had better nights)

By Elias Cepeda

When heavyweight Ryan Martinez (8-2) hit Manny Lara (4-2) twice in the groin over the course of their three round Bellator 75 prelim bout Friday night in Hammond, IN one could only assume that he secured the low blow highlights for the night. Then Eric Prindle came along in the night’s main event and stole Martinez’ nut shot thunder.

If there was a low blow of the night bonus award…what am I saying? If there was a low blow of the decade award, Eric Prindle’s axe kick to the family jewels of a downed Thiago Santos would be the clear front runner.

After a failed jumping guillotine choke left Santos on his back with seconds left in the first round of their Heavyweight Tournament Quarterfinal bout, Prindle (7-3) began kicking him with round houses to the legs. Then the massive Prindle thought to get all GSP with it and loaded up with a stomping axe kick, likely aimed for Santos’ mid section.

Instead, the full force of a 265 pounder’s stomp came down onto the groin of a prone Santos. The Brazilian was given five minutes to recover.

He could have been given thirty. It would likely not have made a difference. Santos laid flat on his face without moving, not even able to writhe in agony, before being lifted onto a stretcher and taken out of the cage.

(Believe it or not, Columbia Pictures saw this coming some 8 months ago, and chose Kevin James to star in a movie about Konrad’s life.) 

Maybe it’s just me, Potato Nation, but recent events have led me to believe that I have stepped into some sort of alternate reality where up is green, foot is west, and Joe Silva apparently never existed. So maybe I should just take the confounding news that current Bellator heavyweight champion and undefeated powerhouse Cole Konrad is retiring from MMA to obtain a position as a financial trader specializing in milk products as sign that my suspicions are correct. Seriously, I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

MMAJunkie has the scoop:

The Twincities.com report said Konrad, 28, is leaving fighting to become a financial trader at a Minnesota-based firm that supplies ingredients to the feed, pet food, food processing and chemical industries. Konrad will specialize in trading milk products. 

Plans to find a new champion are unclear at the moment. The news first was reported byTwincities.com and subsequently confirmed to MMAjunkie.com (www.mmajunkie.com) by a source close to the promotion. 

Of all the reasons for retirement we have heard MMA fighters give…this is a new one.

Let’s get a few things straight before we even start to analyze this one: Yes, Cole Konrad picked up the quickest stoppage of the evening at last night’s Bellator 70 from New Orleans. No, that isn’t our way of saying that the entire card was full of decisions. And no, we aren’t lying to you.

But before we get to that, let’s talk about the evening’s main event. Despite having a heavyweight title fight on the card, the main event of the evening was the lightweight tournament finals between former welterweight standouts Rick Hawn and Brent Weedman. While the first two rounds were razor thin, the third round was all Rick Hawn. Hawn took Weedman down numerous times throughout the round and utilized elbows from inside Weedman’s guard. Weedman put together some late offense, but it was too little, too late. Rick Hawn will meet Michael Chandler next season for a shot at the lightweight title.

(Who knew that this moment would become a metaphor for Eric Prindle’s Bellator career?) 

At this rate, Bellator’s season five heavyweight tournament is going to take longer to come to a close than Strikeforce’s heavyweight tournament, a notion this writer didn’t think was possible until earlier today. Because believe it or not, season five winner Eric Prindle has been forced to withdraw from a scheduled match on less than a week’s notice yet again, this time from his title fight with heavyweight champion Cole Konrad.

The fight, which was supposed to go down at this weekend’s Bellator 65 card, has now been pushed back to May 25th as a result of a hand injury Prindle suffered in training, an injury that he described as “all my own fault.”

(Arianny Celeste photo of the month, via Nuts. Click for full-sized version.)

Some must-read content from our bros around the Internet…

- The Hurt Business: Little Victories, Tender Mercies (MMAFighting)

- Thiago Silva: I’m Going to Kill or Die Against Alexander Gustafsson (Lowkick.Blitzcorner.com)

- Bittersweet Victory: Bellator Heavyweight Eric Prindle Discusses Thiago Santos and Upcoming Title Fight With Cole Konrad (MMAMania)

- We Seriously Want You to Watch Our Weigh-in Video for ONE FC: War of the Lions (MiddleEasy)

- Mighty Mouse Close to 2-to-1 Favored Status Over Ian McCall in Upcoming Rematch (FightOpinion)

- UFC Will Hold First Event in China in 2012 (MMAWeekly)

- Court McGee vs. Nick Ring Rematch Targeted for UFC 149 in Calgary (MMAJunkie)

- The Neighborhood Watch Reference Chart (HolyTaco)

- The 7 Worst Talk Show Hosts Of Our Generation (ScreenJunkies)

- Is Survival Horror Dead or Just Sleeping? (Gamefront)

- The 10 Funniest Comedy Songs (MadeMan)

- Charles Barkley Rocks A Dress For Weight Watchers (TerezOwens)

- VIDEO: Ron Burgundy’s Anchorman 2 Announcement (TurdFergusonBlog)

- How Many Calories Should You Eat To Lose Weight? (BuiltLean)

- What to Expect at This Weekend’s WrestleMania XXVIII (MensFitness)

(“Menstrual period, bro. I’ve done nothing this week except retain water and eat Girl Scout cookies.”)

Remember two weeks ago when a Bellator featherweight tournament competitor was kicked out for missing weight by four pounds? That was nothing. At yesterday’s Bellator 62 weigh-ins in Laredo, Texas, season five heavyweight tournament finalist Thiago “Big Monster” Santos hit the scales at 277.8 pounds, whiffing his heavyweight limit by a full 12.8. By our calculations, this is the third greatest weigh-in failure in MMA history.

Instead of postponing Santos’s HW finals match against Eric Prindle again — remember, this fight has already been re-scheduled twice due to savage groin kick and flu-like symptoms — Bellator decided they’d had enough of Big Monster’s antics and booted him from the tournament. By default, Prindle scores the $100k check and will face undefeated champion Cole Konrad for the Bellator heavyweight title later this year.

All of Bellator 62′s season six lightweight tournament fighters were on weight for their opening-round bouts, although welterweight Joseph Daily came in three pounds heavy for his preliminary card match against Sean Spencer. Full weigh-in results and broadcast info for tonight’s event are below…

(When you gotta go, you gotta go.) 

An apparent case of influenza has forced Bellator season 5 finalist Eric Prindle out from his rematch with fellow finalist Thiago Santos. After their first contest ended in the most brutal form of No Contest possible back at Bellator 59 in November, the pair was set to give things another go at Bellator 61, which goes down tomorrow from the River Dome in Boisser City, LA.

Prindle’s record stands at 9-1 with the aforementioned 1 no-contest, with three of those wins coming under the Bellator banner. In his promotional debut, Prindle scored a second round TKO due to doctor stoppage victory over Josh Burns at Bellator 40 in April of 2011, then cruised past TUF 10 vet Abe Wagner by UD the following October in their season five heavyweight tournament quarterfinal match. In the semi’s, Prindle demolished fellow power puncher Ron Sparks in just forty seconds at Bellator 56 via one punch knockout, earning his spot in the finals alongside Thiago Santos, who had racked up two straight rear-naked choke finishes in his preliminary matches.

Videos of both the Sparks and Santos fights, along with the full lineup for Bellator 61, are after the jump. 

Eric Prindle vs. Thiago Santos, fight ending low blow comes at the 2:07 mark. All videos in this post props to IronForgesIron.com

Coming fresh off of Last week’s action packed show, Bellator looked to keep building momentum last night in Atlantic City, New Jersey. The good news for Bellator is that, for the most part, the card delivered exciting, entertaining fights. The bad news for Bellator? That above video not only happened, but was supposed to be this season’s heavyweight tournament finale.

Rather, this season’s heavyweight tournament ends with a controversial no contest. On one hand, it would be anti-climatic to name a number one contender by disqualification from to an illegal kick. On the other hand, if Santos was aiming for the inside of Prindle’s thigh, it sure didn’t look like it. Prindle will meet Santos again to determine a contender for Cole Konrad, although a date for their next meeting hasn’t been announced yet.

Askren vs. Hieron, part one. All videos in this post via IronForgesIron.com

Bellator returned to action last night in Kansas City with action from the heavyweight tournament and a welterweight title fight between current champion Ben Askren and Season Four tournament winner Jay Hieron. Earlier this week, Ben Askren promised to “maul Jay Hieron”, as our more astute readers may remember. Well, that didn’t exactly happen. We’ll discuss that more in a minute.

The night kicked off with heavyweight tournament semifinals action. To say these fights delivered quick, exciting finishes puts it mildly- It’ll take some of you longer to read this sentence than it’ll take you to actually watch the fights. In the first matchup, Eric Prindle countered a leg kick from Ron Sparks with a brutal straight right forty seconds into their fight. Not to be outdone, Thiago Santos quickly dropped Bellator Season Three heavyweight tournament finalist Neil Grove and sunk in a rear naked choke. The total amount of time it took Santos to do this? Thirty eight seconds. Don’t blink when Eric Prindle meets Thiago Santos at Bellator 59.

(Props: BellatorMMA)

For those of you who had better things to do on Saturday, Bellator put together this helpful video recap of their Season Five heavyweight tournament quarterfinals. And for a card full of relatively obscure big-men, the show wasn’t half bad.

Ron Sparks (8-0) continued his rise towards relevancy with an 84-second knockout of Mark Holata. Sparks also happens to be one of those dudes with his own last name tattooed on his stomach, but we won’t hold it against him. Speaking of stoppages, Blagoi Ivanov (5-0, 1 no contest) also kept his unbeaten record, smashing Zak Jensen standing then putting him to a sleep in the second round with a guillotine choke.

(Ron Sparks: All about the peace and love. / Photo via TheFightNerd.)

Bellator 52 goes down tomorrow night at the L’Auberge du Lac Casino Resort in Lake Charles, Louisiana, featuring the quarterfinals of the promotion’s second heavyweight tournament. We’ll be honest — the eight-man bracket isn’t exactly overflowing with star-power, and watching 265-pounders slug it out is always a mixed bag. But if Cruz vs. Johnson isn’t enough to satisfy your hunger for combat this weekend, you might as well DVR the MTV2 broadcast. (Do it right now, before you forget.) Here’s how the HW quarters shake out:

Neil Grove vs. Mike Hayes
Blagoi Ivanov vs. Zak Jensen
Eric Prindle vs. Abe Wagner
Mark Holata vs. Ron Sparks

Now, some fun facts:

- Blagoi Ivanov is that dude who outpointed Fedor Emelianenko in combat sambo in 2008, back when beating Fedor at anything seemed like a very big deal. He’s now 4-0 with 1 no-contest in his MMA career, and won his Bellator debut in March by TKO’ing William Penn in one round.

Remember: *this* is the guy that the middleweights are competing to fight. Hector Lombard knocked Vitale down twice with one punch. VidProps: BellatorMMA/YouTube

So anybody notice that I mentioned Bellator yesterday?  You did?   And you didn’t comment about how splendiferous Bellator is, and how much you like watching the fights, and in general how witty and good looking we are here at CagePotato?
Well that’s just rude.  I’m inclined to not even bother running down the other two tourneys planned for this season.  Really, it’s like you don’t care.

Oh, alright.  Come on in and we’ll have coffee and talk.  But no staying over.

We considered using a picture of Josh Burns and Eric Prindle, but went with this. You are welcome.

Wow, people. If you didn’t see some crazy good fights last night, we’re sorry you don’t have Showtime. MTV2 and Bellator were in Oklahoma last night, and some fights totally happened, you guys. (It’s still ok to use “you guys” in the body of the article, right Ariel?) Semifinal bouts at 170 and 155 were on the menu for the evening, as well as a Ben Askren Superfight and an extra-large boxing matchup for shits and giggles. There were amazing displays of heart, awful tattoos, and unorthodox wrestling, if you dig that kind of thing; if you are burnt out after MFC, FCF, and that cute little Strikeforce organization, come on in and we’ll give you the low down of who did what to whom. Also, we’ll share what freaking BLEW OUR MINDS last night.