(Sure, “Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Champion” is a respectable title in its own right, but it just doesn’t carry as much weight at the Playboy Mansion, you know?) 

If there’s one thing you can say about former UFC heavyweight champion and Depends spokesperson Tim Sylvia, it’s that the SOB is persistent. Although his once successful MMA career has become little more than a series of punctuated jokes nowadays — most of which revolve around his fat, fatty, “Fatty Boom-Boom” fatness – “The Maine-iac” will simply not be denied his rightful place back in the UFC’s heavyweight division no matter how many times Dana White pisses in his cornflakes.

But the main issue preventing Sylvia’s UFC aspirations from coming to fruition is one that he doesn’t seem to realize: relevant wins. In the past few years, Sylvia has crushed a few cans (and a professional bodybuilder) in unimpressive fashion, been decapitated in 9 seconds by an aging boxer, dropped a decision to Satoshi Ishii, and been spared a loss on a loosely-defined technicality in his completely unnecessary fourth fight with Andrei Arlovski at OneFC 5. Yet despite all this, Sylvia is still holding onto the hopes that he will end his mixed martial arts career “where it started,” which for all intents and purposes is the UFC. He spoke with MMAWeekly:

I don’t know what is going to happen in the future of the UFC heavyweight division. Ideally I would like to finish out my career where it started and that is in the UFC. There’s great fights out there for me and I’d like to put on a great show for the fans on the biggest stage there is, and that’s obviously the UFC.

And who would Boom-Boom like to face in his glorious return, you ask? For starters, Frank Mir, who infamously snatched Sylvia’s title (and his arm) at UFC 48: Payback, otherwise known as the event wherein Ken Shamrock scored his last relevant win…over Kimo. But the second name on Sylvia’s hit list (just beating out Jared from the Subway commercials because “I ate a thousand of those subs and didn’t lose a fucking pound.”), might surprise you:

(“Well, Joe, I’d just like to thank God for giving me the strength to-OH SHIT HERE COMES THE REST OF ‘EM.” Photo courtesy of Getty Images.) 

Let us begin this week’s edition of the Armchair Matchmaker with a few fun facts about last Saturday’s UFC on FOX 7 event: 

-With eight (T)KO’s, UFC on FOX 7 tied UFC 92 for the most (T)KO finishes in a single UFC event in the promotion’s history.

-In defeating Jordan Mein via second round TKO, the resurgent Matt Brown now holds the third longest win streak (5) amongst active UFC welterweights, as well as the record for (T)KO finishes in the welterweight division. Yet incredibly, the FOTN check Brown received was the first end of the night bonus he has earned in some 15 UFC fights.

-Frank Mir, like, really dropped the ball against Daniel Cormier.

Now, using those absolute truths and a little speculation, let’s decide who the biggest winners and losers from UFC on FOX 7 should face next, shall we?

The Winners

Ben Henderson: Well, we already know who he’ll be facing next, so that one is pretty easy. The question now becomes: How do you see Bendo taking it? Split decision, unanimous decision, or the always rare majority decision?

Since we can only post so many “U Mad?” GIFs in one day, this will have to suffice.

The UFC paid out a total of $1,518,000 in disclosed salaries and end of the night bonuses to the fighters on last night’s UFC on Fox 7, according to the California State Athletic Commission. Both former UFC heavyweight champion Frank Mir and current UFC lightweight champion Benson Henderson took home $200,000 for their performances last night, making them the two highest paid fighters on the card. Former Strikeforce lightweight champion Gilbert Melendez took home the evening’s third-highest disclosed salary at $175,000.

The entire disclosed payroll is below, via MMA Junkie. Keep in mind that the following figures account for neither sponsorships and undisclosed “locker room bonuses,” nor do they include deductions for taxes, insurance, and licensing fees. Also, since there were no submissions on the card, two fighters took home a Knockout of the Night bonus.

Benson Henderson: $200,000 (includes $100,000 win bonus)
def. Gilbert Melendez: $175,000

Daniel Cormier: $126,000 (includes $63,000 win bonus)
def. Frank Mir: $200,000

Josh Thomson: $145,000 (includes $10,000 win bonus and $50,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
def. Nate Diaz: $15,000

Matt Brown: $110,000 (includes $30,000 win bonus and $50,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
def. Jordan Mein: $66,000 (includes $50,000 Fight of the Night bonus)

Chad Mendes: $56,000 (includes $28,000 win bonus)
def. Darren Elkins: $24,000

Francis Carmont: $38,000 (includes $19,000 win bonus)
def. Lorenz Larkin: $23,000

Myles Jury: $16,000 (includes $8,000 win bonus)
def. Ramsey Nijem: $14,000

Joseph Benavidez: $66,000 (includes $33,000 win bonus)
def. Darren Uyenoyama: $12,000

T.J. Dillashaw: $28,000 (includes $14,000 win bonus)
def. Hugo Viana: $8,000

Jorge Masvidal: $60,000 (includes $30,000 win bonus)
def. Tim Means: $10,000

Anthony Njorkuani: $36,000 (includes $18,000 win bonus)
def. Roger Bowling: $12,000

Yoel Romero: $70,000 (includes $10,000 win bonus and $50,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
def. Clifford Starks: $8,000

(Photo by Esther Lin | MMAFighting)

By Elias Cepeda 

UFC on Fox 7 was a violent and almost uniformly fought at a furious pace over the course of twelve preliminary and main card bouts. Eight bouts finished inside of the distance, and the main event was five close-fought, damaging rounds long.

Welterweights Matt Brown and Jordan Mein each got extra $50,000 bonus checks for putting on the fight of the night and Josh Thomson and Yoel Romero each got knockout of the night awards and 50k bonuses.

Thomson returned to the UFC in style by handing Nate Diaz his first ever stoppage loss – a second round TKO stoppage. Romero caught Clifford Starks with a flying knee and won a quick via quick TKO.

Neither Daniel Cormier nor Frank Mir won extra bonuses for their three-round heavyweight bout. Cormier did continue to show that he is a legitimate contender in the division, on the strength of his world-class wrestling skills and speed, despite being vastly undersized.

As they took the center of the Octagon, the smaller Cormier looked like he was facing his uncle in the large former two-time heavyweight champ Mir. Once Cormier got a hold of Mir, over and over again throughout the fight, it was the two-time Olympic wrestler that looked like a man fighting a child.

Cormier clinched with Mir, pressed him against the cage, let go and, on separation, unloaded nasty hooks and uppercuts to the head and body of Mir, along with elbows and knees before clinching back up and rinsing and repeating. As the fight wore on and Mir proved helpless against Cormier’s strategy, referee Herb Dean didn’t like Cormier’s dominance so he tried, as all refs disturbingly seem to be instructed to do, to give Mir more of a chance by breaking up the clinch work quickly but that couldn’t stop the wrestler from continuing to close the distance.

Mir would not be mentally broken despite eating big shots and being ground down, and he fought hard in the third round – throwing hard punches and knees. The ones that did connect, however, were absorbed by Cormier, and he just went back to pressing Mir against the cage and doing short striking work at will.

Cormier fought the smartest fight he could against a much larger, more experienced opponent. The cerebral fighter knew that the middle was his friend. Had he stayed out on the outside, Mir might have used his far superior reach to land big shots.

Had Cormier taken Mir down (he did so once, with a single leg, but did not follow Mir to the ground. Choosing instead, to let the Jiu Jitsu master stand up and eat an over hand right), he would have let the black belt do work where he was most comfortable and dangerous. So, Cormier did what he should have – control the clinch and then use his superior speed to land at will on separation.

I don’t know how long this lightweight/welterweight-heighted phenom will continue to be successful at heavyweight, but so far he can count two former UFC heavyweight champs as wins, as well as the #1 contender to the belt right now, Antonio Silva. It has been fun to watch Cormier figure out how to win fights at heavyweight.

(Premature celebration. Always a great idea. / Photo via CombatLifestyle.com. For more images from this set, click here.)

Tonight at the HP Pavilion in San Jose, top-ranked lightweight contender Gilbert Melendez will finally get his chance to prove himself in the Octagon — with Benson Henderson‘s belt on the line — while undefeated phenom Daniel Cormier will attempt to justify his own swelling hype in a heavyweight matchup with Frank Mir. Add in all the other UFC vs. Strikeforce matchups, and you basically have MMA’s version of the Sharks vs. the Jets, but with the dance steps replaced by middle fingers in your got-damn face. So will the latest batch of Strikeforce crossovers make the grade or will they go up in smoke?

Taking you through the action tonight is our good friend Elias Cepeda, who’s giving us round-by-round results from the UFC on FOX 7 main card broadcast after the jump beginning at 8 p.m. ET / 5 p.m. PT. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and share your own thoughts in the comments section.

As we pointed out on Facebook earlier today, the entire main card of this Saturday’s UFC on FOX: Henderson vs. Melendez event features a UFC veteran taking on a former Strikeforce standout. What’s more, there are four fights on the prelims that fit this same pattern. While the UFC has set up cards along national lines in the past — see UFC 58: USA vs. Canada and UFC 117: USA vs. Brazil, Pretty Much they’ve never been this overt with their UFC vs. Strikeforce matchmaking. Will the UFC vets fight harder in an attempt to defend their turf? Will the Strikeforce crossovers band together to continue their invasion of the Octagon? Take a look at all eight matchups below and let us know which side you think will emerge victorious.

Headshot images via Card/The UG.

BENSON HENDERSON vs. GILBERT MELENDEZ (for UFC lightweight title)
The odds say: Bendo is a strong favorite to defend his belt at -250.
We say: When you put this much talent into the cage at the same time, anything can happen. But while we think this fight will be closer than the betting line reflects, there’s been an unbreakable, unstoppable quality to Henderson’s performances during his 6-0 UFC run. Until we see how Melendez actually performs in the Octagon, we’re picking the champ.

FRANK MIR vs. DANIEL CORMIER (HW)
The odds say: Cormier is a virtual lock at -375.
We say: That sounds about right. Cormier has all the skills to be a future UFC champ, and barring any freakish leglocks, Frank Mir is just a stop along the way.

(Props: YouTube.com/UFC)

It’s as simple as this — Saturday’s UFC on Fox 7: Henderson vs. Melendez card features top-ranked fighters and heavy stakes. As such, we love getting a lil’ something extra in anticipation of it. This UFC on Fox 7: Road to the Octagon documentary gives us just that, including behind-the-scenes footage with Benson Henderson (competing at a Jiu Jitsu tournament with his mom, working out with the NFL’s Larry Fitzgerald), Gilbert Melendez (at home and at work with his ex-fighter fiance and business partner, chilling with his tight-knit ‘Skrap Pack’), Frank Mir (crying, and on a flight to New Mexico to conduct the first training camp of his career away from his wife and twenty kids) and more pre-fight action from Josh Thomson, Nate Diaz, and Daniel Cormier.

It’s a good way to waste your lunch hour today — better, at least, than talking to that weird guy at the office who always just eats a can of soup for lunch, like, every day. (Seriously? Get some protein in there, you’re a grown ass man.) Anyway, watch it and tune in Saturday. It’s free, so you’ve got no excuse not to, fight fans.

-Elias Cepeda

(Wow! Booster seats and sporks at McDonalds looked really weird back in the old days. Photo via idahogirlinalaska)

By Nathan Smith and Josh Hutchinson

Being a “contributor” for CagePotato.com is kind of like being a barback at a seedy nightclub in Tijuana. We stock the bar with booze, ice, and clean glassware while staying in the shadows hoping to God that we don’t get yelled at. We try to help out wherever we can so the star bartenders (Ben Goldstein, Jared Jones, Elias Cepeda and Seth Falvo) can toss bottles of shitty Tequila like juggling pins while they pour fruit-flavored cocktails to semi hot chicks that they will inevitably hump later on. A contributor cleans up puke, empties ashtrays and eats shit from all the “made men” (both writers and tenured comment section dick-heads) here at CagePotato but it really is a great gig. Can you imagine the sloppy seconds that Danga sends our way?

Needless to say, most of the day-to-day MMA related news topics are taken care of by the staff writers and that leaves aspiring dipshits like me and Hutchinson to try and come up with a fresh or entertaining story idea on our own. Well, this idea is not fresh but it could be entertaining (at least my portions will be, but I have hope for Hutch since he is the guy who brought the word “dicknailed” to the CP). When Jon Fitch was released from his UFC contract last week, I wanted to write a piece on which higher profile fighters I would cut next if I were part of the UFC brass. Because opinions are like buttholes, Hutch had a thought to debate several of the choices in a YAY or NAY style. Before anyone starts hollering about Clay Guida, Jake Shields or the entire cast from the first season of The Ultimate Fighter (that means you Koscheck) take note that we agreed on more than we disagreed and in the spirit of pointless arguments opted to leave the most obvious offenders out. Let’s get started.

FRANK MIR – last disclosed salary: $200,000

(Photo via MMAWeekly)

Opinions that fans and pundits have on testosterone replacement therapy (TRT) and its place in MMA are about as varied as the search engine terms that brought you here. With Dana White promising to “test the shit out of” fighters on testosterone replacement therapy to Vitor Belfort lashing out at his critics on Twitter over his own TRT usage, we’ve seen two different extremes over the course of this weekend alone. It’s a complicated issue that has many different ways of being interpreted; possibly none of which are entirely right or wrong by themselves. With that in mind, here’s an attempt at condensing the plethora of opposing views on the issue into nine different ways to look at it, arranged in no particular order.

1.) It’s Incredibly Dangerous For Both Fighters Involved.

Perhaps the most common criticism I’ve heard and read regarding testosterone replacement therapy in MMA is that it makes an already dangerous occupation even more hazardous. This is easy to observe through the perspective of the user’s opponent. It’s one thing if Barry Bonds wants to hit longer home runs, or if Hedo Turkoglu wants to flop harder — their opponents are not physically hurt by their actions in either example. However, if an MMA fighter takes testosterone to become more aggressive and punch harder, the likelihood of his opponent suffering irreparable brain damage increases dramatically.

Often neglected, however, are the additional long-term risks that the TRT user opens himself up to. Testosterone may make a fighter faster and stronger, but it doesn’t exactly undo brain damage. Prolonging a fighter’s physical prime also elongates the amount of time he’s receiving blows to the head. Imagine if boxers like Meldrick Taylor and Riddick Bowe – who showed signs of dementia pugilistica by the ends of their careers yet didn’t retire until they couldn’t stay in shape — had access to testosterone replacement therapy. Giving aging fighters the illusion that they can keep taking shots to the head because they’re still in good physical condition is bound to end in disaster.

2.) TRT Isn’t Nearly The Advantage It’s Made Out to Be.

(The Gracie Brothers speak out about the rape case involving Lloyd Irvin students, and explain how an unhealthy training environment could contribute to similar situations. / Props: GracieBreakdown)

- Eddie Alvarez Offered UFC 159 Co-Main Event; Will Seek Injunction at Court Hearing on Jan 25 (BleacherReport)

- Manager: UFC Champ Ronda Rousey Meant No Disrespect With Sandy Hook Video (MMAJunkie)

- Nick Newell to Dana White: ‘I Want My Equal Opportunity’ (MMAFighting)

- Why the ‘Frank Mir Curse’ May Spell Doom for Daniel Cormier’s Octagon Career (MMAMania)

- Kimbo Slice to Box Shane Tilyard, Jan. 30 in Sydney (TheSweetScience)

- Dan Henderson Won’t Wait For Title Fight (FightDay)

- The 25 Greatest Trash-Talkers in Sports History (Complex)

- “I Know A Liar When I’m Around One.”: Manti Te’o's Uncle Comments On Ronaiah Tuiasosopo (Deadspin)

- 7 Scariest Workout Injuries — And How to Prevent Them (MensFitness)

- The Screen Junkies Show: ‘Django’ Toy Review In South Central (ScreenJunkies)

- The 30 Most Awkward Childhood Photos Ever (WorldWideInterweb)

(Frank Mir, master of the male bitch-face. / Photo via Getty Images)

It’s official: The heavyweight battle between Daniel Cormier and Frank Mir will go down at UFC on FOX 7, April 20th at the HP Pavilion in San Jose. Yahoo! Sports reported the booking today, also confirming that the Benson Henderson vs. Gilbert Melendez lightweight title fight will be on the card.

Cormier and Mir were originally scheduled to fight under the Strikeforce banner in November, but the former UFC heavyweight champ had to pull out of the match due to injury. Mir hasn’t competed since his TKO loss to Junior Dos Santos at UFC 146 in May. For the record, Mir wasn’t too impressed with Cormier’s TKO win over Dion Staring this weekend, telling MMAJunkie:

(“Psssh, you best drop that tough guy shit right now, Bigfoot, because I can see the future and it doesn’t look good for you.”)

I feel really bad for Frank Mir’s brain. While it is quite an impressive brain when compared to many of its MMA counterparts, it is clearly beginning to wear under the stress of some pent-up, masochistic desires. It has been beaten into unconsciousness in every one of Mir’s six MMA losses, including two particularly brutal/carried-out beatings at the hands of Brock Lesnar and Shane Carwin — both of whom have hands bigger than the average newborn deer — yet it still keeps coming back for more. Most recently, Mir’s brain stepped in on short notice to get kneaded like a fresh Arepa by Junior dos Santos at UFC 146, to the point that its host body was shooting invisible free throws by the end of the night. Twas a sad sight indeed.

Mir’s brain was scheduled for concussion #7 against Daniel Cormier in November, but was granted a temporary reprieve from the injury Governor shortly thereafter. Where one would think that Mir’s brain would go the Paul Daley route and call out someone way below its level for a gimme fight, it instead insisted on calling out Cormier again, CTE be damned.

And it appears as if Cormier is more than willing to play huckleberry to Mir’s twisted desires, as the champ recently stated that — once he gets past Whatshisname Iknowthis at the final Strikeface event in January — he would still like to settle some unfinished business with Mir’s masochistic brain.

FighthubTV has the scoop after the jump.

(If the name “Michelle Jenneke” means anything to you, this will be your favorite video of the week. / Props: TheChive)

- Frank Mir Healthy, Ready To Challenge Daniel Cormier (Fightline)

- Unlike Mike Ricci, Colton Smith Views ‘TUF’ Experience as a Positive (MMAFighting)

- Firas Zahabi: Rory MacDonald Was Not Showboating Against BJ Penn (Sherdog)

- Jon Jones Talks About Move To Heavyweight Division (FightDay)

- Dan Hardy Interested in Fight With Matt Brown, Dismissive of Matt Riddle (BloodyElbow)

- UFC on FX 6: Sotiropoulos vs. Pearson Weigh-In Results (MMAConvert)

- 16 MMA Ring Girls So Hot It Hurts (MadeMan)

- The Most Intense Feuds in Mixed Martial Arts [VIDEO] (BleacherReport)

- Maiquel Falcao meets Alexander Shlemenko for Middleweight Title at Bellator 88 (MMAJunkie)

- 13 Celebrities Who Fight Fat with Martial Arts (MensFitness)

- The 50 Greatest Movie Laughs of All Time (WorldWideInterweb)

- The 25 Worst Reality TV Stars of 2012 (Complex)

- Hollywood Superman Reviews the ‘Man of Steel’ Trailer [VIDEO] (ScreenJunkies)

(If James Irvin was a super-hero, his arch-nemesis would be Dr. Fitchtopus. / Photo courtesy of fcfighter.com)

Last week, we described Stefan Struve as “one of the least decision-prone fighters on the UFC roster,” and after he ended yet another fight this weekend before the final bell, we started to wonder — how accurate was that statement, anyway? And who else ranks near the Dutch heavyweight in terms of low decision ratio within the Octagon? So, we assembled a list of the UFC fighters (past and present) who have been least likely to meet the judges; for the purposes of this list, we only considered fighters who have made at least eight UFC appearances.

[Update: After having some knowledge dropped on us by @MMADecisions, we've expanded this list beyond a top-ten.]

As it turns out, Struve comes in at #5 among active UFC fighters, and shares the same decision ratio (8.33%) as Royce Gracie. But there are 11 fighters in front of him on the all-time list, led by welterweight crowd-pleaser DaMarques Johnson, cursed slugger James Irvin, and UFC pioneer Don Frye, who all managed to make it through 10 UFC appearances without ever going to decision. And now, the leaderboard…

DaMarques Johnson: 10 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
James Irvin: 10 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Don Frye: 10 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Drew McFedries: 9 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Charles Oliveira: 8 UFC fights*, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Ryan Jensen: 8 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Jason Lambert: 8 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Gary Goodridge: 8 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Jason MacDonald: 14 UFC fights, 1 decision, 7.14% decision ratio

When Frank Mir got injured and had to pull out of his scheduled fight with Strikeforce champion Daniel Cormier for their scheduled November 3rd fight Dana White asked UFC heavyweight Matt Mitrione to fill in for Mir. On Saturday White told reporters that Mitrione had turned down the fight and that he was not happy about it.

“It fucking makes me sick,” White said, according MMA Junkie. “Listen, you don’t want big opportunities, I hear you. I get it, then. All I can say is, I guess he doesn’t want big opportunities. I get it. Duly noted.”

White went on to say that Mitrione’s decision to just continue to train for his already scheduled December 29th against Phil De Fries was “fucking insane.”

“It makes no sense to me, and it’s insane. I’m a little bummed out by it. We’ll figure it out. Yeah, [Mitrione has already got a fight booked]. He said, ‘I’ll just take that one.’”

(Too. Damn. Talented.)

By: Jason Moles

I’m sure there are more important things to talk about just days away from Jones-Henderson Jones-Sonnen Jones-Machida Jones-Belfort than another gimmicky post attempting to be relevant, but it’s been a while since we gave away CagePotato T-Shirts and we love you guys so much that we’ve decided to do it again. Here’s how it’s going to go down. Below is a list of 25 fighters and a brave attempt to describe them in three words. Not two, not four, just three simple words. Pretty easy, right? Read through them, then tweet us @CagePotatoMMA with your own three-word MMA fighter descriptions, including the hashtag #MMAFighterIn3Words. The three best submissions by tomorrow at 5 p.m. ET will win a shirt. (We’ll update this post with the winners after we select them.) Now let’s begin, shall we?

Quinton “Rampage” Jackson: Exit stage left.

Alexander “The Mauler” Gustafsson: Seeking next level.

Jon “Bones” Jones: If Healthy, Undefeated.*

Diego “The Dream” Sanchez: Starting over again.

Leonard Garcia: God help him.

Matt Hughes: Slayer of beasts.

(“Easy, Bubba. Easy. Okay, okay, tap tap tap…TAP! TAP! AHHHH FUUUUUUUCK!! Damn it! I have a fight coming up, you asshole! Why did you do that? Why?!?”)

And so, the 2012 UFC injury bug — which is now thought to be the result of a top-secret government experiment — escapes from the eight walls of the Octagon, and goes forth to inflict suffering on the rest of humanity. As first reported by Morency Sports TV, Frank Mir has been forced to withdraw from his November 3rd Strikeforce meeting with Daniel Cormier, due to an injury. MMAJunkie has confirmed the report, and says that Mir’s injury might be knee-related.

The heavyweight stunt-booking was scheduled to be Cormier’s last appearance in Strikeforce before moving to the UFC, so hopefully Zuffa will be able to hustle up a new opponent for him to keep his transition on schedule. Nothing has been reported yet, so I’m just going to throw out some names: Arlovski. Bonnar. Laupua. Just stop me if my matchmaking genius begins to overwhelm you.

We’ll update you when we know more.

(“Hey girl, you must be a comb because you’re been running through my hair all day. Wait, no, I fucked that up.”)

The previously reported UFC/Strikeforce crossover bout between Frank Mir and Daniel Cormier finally has a date and location. According to new reports from MMAFighting and USA Today, the fight will headline a November 3rd Strikeforce card at the Chesapeake Energy Arena in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Barring some bizarre post-fight fiasco, both fighters are expected to head (back) to the UFC after the event, no matter the outcome of the match.

As Cormier told USA Today, “I am excited to be going back to Oklahoma for this fight because it’s been like my second home. My first fight was in Oklahoma, and the biggest fight of my Strikeforce career will be there…Fighting Frank Mir is an honor, as I’ve always viewed him as a great warrior and champion of the sport. This matchup shows that Zuffa is committed to putting me in big fights, and for that I thank them.”

Cormier is a perfect 10-0 in his MMA career, most recently outpointing Josh Barnett in the finals of Strikeforce’s heavyweight grand prix. Cormier broke his right hand during the fight and was forced to undergo surgery. Mir’s last performance was a TKO loss to Junior Dos Santos at UFC 146, which snapped a three-fight winning streak in the Octagon.

Strikeforce middleweight champion Luke Rockhold is also expected to be on the 11/3 card, against an opponent to be named later. Update: Rockhold will defend his belt against former light-heavyweight contender Lorenz Larkin, whose middleweight debut in July resulted in a unanimous decision victory over Robbie Lawler.

(Drunk foul shots are always the toughest foul shots.) 

Well…this is interesting. According to a report by USA Today and in accordance with both Strikeforce and UFC officials, it appears that Daniel Cormier’s first and last Strikeforce title defense against none other than former UFC Heavyweight champion Frank Mir. The fight will go down as the co-main event of the Gilbert Melendez vs. Pat Healy headlined Strikeforce event on September 29th, a decision that will in no way come back and bite them in the ass. Seriously, the co-main event? WHO IS MAKING THESE DECISIONS?! The guy who invented the Candwich?!

[UPDATE] It appears that the fight is now being looked at for an October or November Strikeforce card, likely as the main event. 

Minor rant aside, Dana White informed USA Today that Mir would make for a perfect test for Cormier:

There has been a lot of speculation as to who Cormier would fight next, and this is the fight that makes the most sense. 

The reality is, Cormier is one of the best heavyweights in the world. He just won the grand prix and beat Josh Barnett. He needs to fight opponents of that caliber, and Frank Mir is that guy.

A surprise considering Mir is on the heels of a second round (T)KO loss to Junior Dos Santos? Further proof that the remaining Strikeforce belts aren’t worth the pleather and scrap metal they’re made of? A little bit of both?

Help us decide.

More on this story after the jump.

(Thanks to tufentertainment.net for the fitting logo.)

By Nathan Smith

With the recent announcement that Roy Nelson and Shane Carwin have been named as the coaches for the next installment of The Ultimate Fighter series, the MMA universe immediately launched into a full-blow orgasmic ticker-tape parade complete with tons of flying confetti and a marching band belting out death metal tunes. Once I heard the news, it was as if my life instantaneously turned into a beer commercial and the entire Potato Nation was invited. There was a rad pool-party, barbeque, a plethora of hotties, endless alcohol, and an overall quest for fun.

Well . . . . . actually, none of that happened. In fact, when word spread that Nelson and Carwin would helm the next season of TUF, it was officially filed under “WTF?” Judging from the comment section, most of the CP brethren didn’t care for the choices either. TUF is coming off a season that saw the ratings dip lower than they ever had, which could partially be blamed on the move to FX and the dreaded Friday night time slot. Regardless of the variables for the ratings drop, something drastic needs to be done, but is anybody really convinced that Carwin and Nelson are the answer to TUF’s slow and painful demise? Let’s start from the beginning and take a look back to see if this runaway train can be coaxed back onto the main rail.

The Season That Started it All 

The inaugural season of TUF featured future Hall of Famers Chuck Liddell and Randy Couture as the competing coaches who would go mano y mano at the PPV after the season finale. For fans of the UFC, that was good enough for most to initially tune in for the Fertitta-funded experiment. It still remains the best crop of young talent and personalities to ever grace the show; future stars like Forrest Griffin, Stephan Bonnar, Josh Koscheck, Chris Leben, Diego Sanchez, Mike Swick, Kenny Florian, and Nate Quarry were all complete unknowns vying for stardom in a fledgling sport. You mix in the whole “fatherless bastard” angle and the show was off and running even before the awe-inspiring climax between (pre TRT) FoGrif and The American Psycho. Even before that, we were treated to the greatest speech of all time that has since been condensed into a few words. “Do you wanna be a fighter?” Though there were other memorable moments from the seasons that followed, Zuffa should have quit while they were ahead because it would never be this good again. The unrefined personification of immature talent, undeniable aspirations and gonzo-sized balls oozed from the boob tube during every episode.

(On the count of three, I want everyone who is not pulling a fast one to raise their hand.) 

If there are two things that we would be willing to bet the house on in light of recent events, it’s that half of the scheduled fights for the next few months will be cancelled due to injury, and the few participants who remain standing after the smoke clears will only be doing so as a result of testosterone replacement therapy. So goes the story for TUF 1 winner and former light heavyweight champion Forrest Griffin, the most recent UFC behemoth  fighter who both filed for and was successful in receiving a therapeutic use exemption for TRT over the past couple months.

Griffin joins the ranks of such puny weaklings as Frank Mir and Chael Sonnen that will never be able to produce testosterone naturally again, leading us to wonder how that will effect his chances of survival once the whole apocalypse thing he has been talking about actually hits. Tip #147: TRT is for girly men; always go au naturale.

(“DO YOU SMELL WHAT THE FRANK IS COOKING??”)

Wow, Frank Mir wants to face Brock Lesnar again more than we realized. The two-time UFC heavyweight champion (and two-time Lesnar adversary) recently told The Chronicle Journal that he is “not opposed to the idea” of becoming a professional wrestler, although he did clarify that he “can’t do a back flip or anything.”

Mir has never kept secret the fact that he wants revenge on Lesnar for the beating he took at Brock’s hands in their rematch. With Lesnar back in the WWE, maybe Mir realizes that his only chance at getting his paws on Brock again is for the two of them to work together in a squared circle.

But could Mir really be trusted to stick to the script and work collaboratively with his nemesis, should they meet up in the WWE? Daniel Puder taught us that MMA fighters can’t always be trusted to make pro wrestling superstars look good in the ring.

(CAAAANNN YOOOUUU DIG IT?!!) 

If you’ve ever found yourself entranced by a raspy, baritone voice calling out “We’re rollin!” from the locker rooms of a UFC event, then you are undoubtedly familiar with the UFC’s “babysitter to the stars,” Burt Watson. I will be the first to admit that in my infinite wisdom, I once failed to recognize one of the most crucial members of the sport’s highest promotion when he was caught on camera during one of Dana White’s infamous Danavlogs. It is to this date the biggest mindfart I have ever farted (which is saying something), but needless to say, without Watson shuffling fighters around, organizing them for press conferences, and getting them amped up for their fights, the UFC would be a shell of the “well-oiled machine” that it truly is.

Wanting to recognize the crucial role Watson plays in the UFC, Sportsnet recently dedicated a brief video to his greatness, reeling in such UFC stars as Georges. St Pierre (who does a hilarious Watson impression when prompted), Frank Mir, Junior dos Santos, and even the boss man himself to sing his praises. So check it out if you’ve got a couple extra minutes, and leave your own praises in the comments section.

(Titty Relaxation Therapy > Testosterone Replacement Therapy any day of the week.) 

Randy Couture has made some pretty bold claims ever since retiring (again) from the sport, a few of which have left more than a few fans scratching their heads, and others writing it off as pure senility. It’s comforting, however, to see that a guy who fought in the sport’s highest promotion until he was 47 years old take a stance on the TRT issue that has seemingly plagued the UFC’s finest as of late. With everyone from Frank Mir to Dan Henderson seeking and/or receiving therapeutic use exemptions for TRT, as well as guys like Nate Marquardt suddenly claiming that they no longer need it, most people can’t make heads or tails of the legitimacy of the increasingly popular issue.

Luckily “Captain America” is here to put things in perspective:

You know, I understand it. There’s this whole movement out there for anti-aging. It started out with guys in their 50′s who, naturally as you get older, your testosterone levels deplete. Your body quits producing more, and they want to feel and recover and do the things they did when they were younger. I understand that.

But I think there are natural ways to jumpstart your body’s own production rather than put an external source of testosterone in your body. And I think putting the external in only compounds the issues that your already having. I think the problem…obviously Chael, Marquardt, there’s been several athletes that have been using TRT.

I think for them, it’s not a function of having depleted levels of testosterone, it’s wanting to have testosterone levels of a 21 year old again, because when you were 21, let’s face it, you recovered better, you’re probably gonna compete better, especially if you’re 32 and have that experience going into a fight. 

Couture goes on to mention several of the methods he used to stay young at heart, which included marrying, then divorcing lunatics at least ten years his junior on the regular. True dat, brother.

Join us after the jump for the full interview. 

(R.I.P Geico Gecko. May your free soul never again be confused with a half-rate car insurance plan.) 

You gotta love being a world famous sports figure, amirite? Every move examined under a magnifying glass, a legion of people claiming to hate you despite having never come within 100 miles of you before — it sounds fucking wonderful. Just ask Jon Jones. After he got a little tipsy behind the wheel with a couple of friends and wrecked his Bentley in the process, he no more than could check his pants for a bowl of chocolate pudding before said legions of the blind were ready and waiting to bash him anonymously or throw him their undying support.

Don’t be mistaken, Jones had some of the hate coming. The fact that he stated just one month before his brush up with the law that he would never, you know, have a brush up with the law or anything, made his fall from that high horse all the more painful. But so heavy lies the crown, in fact, that the guys over at Sportsnet called upon such UFC stars as Dominick Cruz, Junior dos Santos, and Frank Mir among other to help us cope with this devastating situation.

If you can’t tell by the sarcasm plastered across the last sentence, we are more willing to forgive Jones for his actions than most. The case seems to be the same with Mir, who was content to give the “we all make mistakes” response when questioned on the issue:

I get mad at people that are quick to judge him, you know, ‘How could you ever drink and drive?!’ And I’m not ever going to say it’s right; it’s wrong to drink and drive. But if you’re a person who drinks, and you’re going to tell me that you’ve never gotten behind the wheel when you’ve had more than one beer an hour, or one shot, or one glass of wine; you’ve drove when you shouldn’t have, and you made a mistake.

The difference is, is that he got bit on his bad mistake. The good thing that now, maybe he can learn from it now, and not continue to do that on, but we all fall down. The point is that you get back up and march forward, you acknowledge what you did…I want to meet the person that’s never screwed up.

Oh, Frank. Only you can have us questioning the legitimacy of your claims one day and in your corner the next.

Check out the video after the jump. 

(So I sez to da brod, “Chael sent me,” and she just hands the needles right ova!!) 

To say that it has been a disturbing week in the world almost does too much justice for the term “disturbing.” It has been an abhorring week. There have been two cases of zombie-like acts of cannibalism reported in the past few days alone. Two. If you can stomach it, see for yourself what the human race is still capable of. Being a bit of a paranoid, Burt Gummer-esque survivalist at heart, upon hearing this news, I immediately took to the stocked gun cabinet that rests in the dining room of my countryside abode, stepped outside, and began target practicing on squirrels, chipmunks, and whatever else happened to cross my path. Because this is how it begins, people. You know, the stuff those guys in face paint and textiles told us would happen so many years ago. And I hate to be a dick, but I warned you fuckers. Many, many times. And you just didn’t want to listen.

Self whoring aside, I’d like to think that when the news in the real world gets me down, I can always turn to the world of MMA/combat sports for a little bit of solace, be it in the form of a fantastic knockout, a discussion with friends, or a news story that makes me smile from ear to ear. So you can imagine my disappointment when I came across yet another story of a mixed martial artist, this time Frank Mir, hopping on the TRT bandwagon.

I’ll admit, I found it a little odd when Frank told Ariel Helwani that he didn’t want to discuss the matter in the interviews leading up to his UFC 146 clash with Junior Dos Santos, because let’s be honest, when is there ever something that Frank Mir doesn’t want to talk about? BloodyElbow’s Brent Brookhouse seems to agree with this sentiment, and Mir’s avoidance of the issue makes so much more sense in retrospect.

(That awkward moment when fireballs fail to shoot out of your hands.)

The UFC paid out $1,513,000 in disclosed salaries and performance bonuses for last Saturday’s UFC 146: Dos Santos vs. Mir card, with Junior Dos Santos, Frank Mir, and Cain Velasquez‘s matching $200,000 checks eating up about 40% of the total. The full salary list is below via MMAJunkie. Keep in mind that these figures don’t include additional revenue from sponsorships, undisclosed “locker room bonuses,” or percentages of the pay-per-view revenue that are in some fighters’ contracts.

Junior Dos Santos: $200,000 (no win bonus)
def. Frank Mir: $200,000

Cain Velasquez: $200,000 (includes $100,000 win bonus)
def. Antonio Silva: $70,000

Roy Nelson: $110,000 (includes $20,00 win bonus and $70,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
def. Dave Herman: $21,000

Stipe Miocic: $20,000 (includes $10,000 win bonus)
def. Shane Del Rosario: $20,000

By Elias Cepeda

Props: MMAFighting.com

Junior dos Santos is a walking, terrifying public relations smashing machine. Not only did he Babe Ruth it and fulfill his prediction of winning by 2nd round stoppage over former two-time champion Frank Mir Saturday night, but he also provided the best feel-good photo op of the year so far.

Junior trains out of Luis Carlos Dorea’s Champion Boxing gym in Brazil which, in addition to being headquarters for world-class fighters, is home to a vibrant youth boxing program. After training one day, the UFC Primetime cameras caught one of the little tikes hanging asking Junior to take him with him to the states for his title fight.

At the time, Junior said, “we’ll see.” But he ended up bringing the 9 year-old kid and his family to Vegas to watch him win. After beating Mir, he lifted the lucky young fighter onto his shoulders and posed for the cameras along with his coaches.

Dos Santos definitely appears to have the Wanderlei Silva nice guy/maniac fighter balance down pat. Try as I might, that image warms my cynical heart, and I don’t give a damn how orchestrated it may or may not have been. Who doesn’t like watching a kid’s dream come true before their eyes?

Nathan “The12ozCurls” Smith

As painful as the UFC post-fight press conferences are to sit though, you sure do learn (or at least get teased with) some vital information about the future of the organization. Stuff like: Dana White saying that he doesn’t want to deal with Alistair Overeem because “he sat in front of us . . . . Lied to us.” There is an entire horse meat story waiting to be written by Josh Hutchinson on that, but I am talking about good juicy TMZ’esque gossip shit. The Overeem issue is kind of news but it was overshadowed by another series of questions asked.

Because there was not a camera pointed at the media members, I am not certain it was Ariel Helwani – but I am pretty damn positive – who asked the most intriguing questions of the night. I AM sure that there are not a lot of guys that (sound like a baritone-polite-Mogwai and) have the stones to ask the necessary questions – but big props to Helwani if it was in fact him.

(Damn, Junior…give away your gameplan much? / Photo courtesy of MMAFighting.com)

After a preliminary card dominated by relatively normal-sized men — borrrrring! — we’ve finally arrived at tonight’s central theme: Big sons-of-bitches. That’s right, UFC 146‘s main card features five consecutive heavyweight fights, most of which look pretty damn entertaining on paper. Can massive underdog Frank Mir pull off Impossible Career Comeback #2, or will he succumb to the buzzsaw-like boxing of Junior Dos Santos, just like so many before him? Can Lavar Johnson score two knockouts in the same month (!), or is he in over his head — figuratively, and otherwise — against Stefan Struve? And does Roy Nelson really think he’s doing himself any favors with that ratty-ass gray beard?