(Beltran, as re-imagined by Sega.)

Last weekend’s Strikeforce: Rousey vs. Kaufman card was easily one of the most entertaining top-to-bottom cards in recent memory, providing us with a lightning quick (also, completely predictable) finish in the main event and an even quicker knockout in the co-main. But as is typical for a Strikeforce event, the night was not without controversy and a few judgmental errors. Herb Dean went completely against character when he botched the call in the Adlan Amagov/Keith Barry fight, and the decision to place former title challenger Meisha Tate’s comeback bout against Julie Kedzie on the prelims was nothing short of baffling.

But greater than witnessing Ronda Rousey‘s sixth straight first round armbar, greater even than OSP’s one-punch knockout of T.J. Cook, was that of referee Mike Beltran’s epic mustache. An “epistache” if you will. Why Beltran decided to become a referee instead of claiming his place atop the Whisker Wars podium is beyond us, but his hard work and dedication can not and will not be overlooked by us here at CagePotato. So join us after the jump for a brief GIF tribute to Beltran’s glorious stache, along with several gifs from the night’s fights, courtesy of the UG.

(Praises be to The UG for this bonerific gif.) 

Mamma Mia. It isn’t often that one of the UFC’s crowd shots really causes that much of a stir in the MMA world — sure, there is the “Just Bleed” guy, Diego Sanchez’s spiritual life partner, and Mickey Rourke’s frigid girlfriend — but suffice it to say, we may have found the crowd gif to end all crowd gifs in the mysterious “girl in the white dress” that was spotted at UFC on FOX 4. Say what you want about women’s beach volleyball, but this girl packs more power than all of Team Brazil and Team Spain combined.

Just look at that little jump she throws in at the end. Not unlike the pink tank top girl on those Shake Weight DVD’s, you can tell that she’s totally in on it.

If you’re reading this, girl in the white dress, please send all of your standard information (name, address, phone number, bra size, turn-ons, list of fears) to feedback@cagepotato.com so we can send you a conveniently altered CagePotato shirt and our congratulations on this historic achievement in UFC fan hotness immediately.

Now let’s just hope that Tom Lawlor doesn’t impersonate her at his next weigh-in.

-J. Jones

(Exhibit ‘A’ in Alistair’s NYE face-pushing trial.)

Sometimes words don’t do a video the justice a slightly sped-up looped graphics interchanged format photo mash-up does, so why even bother?

Instead we’ve thrown together a few random GIFs of Alistair Overeem breaking out his sweet dance moves in a shoe store with a Justin Bieber and a “Kid” Yamamoto lookalike. Nothing bizarre about that, right? Pretty much every MMA champ has done it.

Check out the awesomeness after the jump.

Video courtest of allthebestfights.com.

Last night’s MFC 31 wasn’t the only MMA card our friends north of the border were treated to. Astute readers may have also remembered that Instinct MMA made its promotional debut in Quebec, Canada last night as well. The night’s main event pitted ex-hockey enforcer Steve Bosse against UFC veteran Houston Alexander. With a combined fourteen knockouts in twenty victories for the pair, you probably guessed that someone was going to get knocked out. And my God did these two deliver.

GIFs are after the jump.

(“Ladies, hide yo boats unless you want ‘em motored. And men, protect you nuts at all times. You been warned.”)

With UFC 135 night rapidly approaching and it being Hump Day and all, we figured why not throw up a gallery of GIFs of one half of Saturday night’s main event, Quinton “Rampage” Jackson, humping reporters and smacking people in the face?

For those of you whose browsers lock up when the word “GIF” even appears on your SVGA screen, don’t worry. Your Pentium II should be fine since we put the animations on separate pages.

You’re welcome.

Check out 20 GIFs of that crazy chain-wearin, motor-boatin’, stank breff hatin’ sonofabitch clownin’ around after the jump.

(Photo courtesy of MMAFighting.com. “Roy Nelson is exhausted” gif placed after the jump by popular demand. But if you move your head from side to side while looking at this picture, it’s basically the same thing.)

Yeah, we know what we said we said about last night’s show, but despite the underwhelming co-main events there was a fair amount of action on the card (yes, even from those two fights). Join us after the jump then get something to eat while the page loads.

(All props go to the legendary Zombie Prophet)

This guy knows what we’re talking about.

The nature of mixed martial arts competition means that you never know what you’re going to get when you tune in. Maybe a stand-up war, maybe a kinetic chess match. For some fans, there is nothing so thrilling as a technical back-and-forth mat battle.

Hell, some people even enjoy watching Ben Askren catch a firm grip on his opponent and breakdance all over him for fifteen minutes, and they get all hot and bothered seeing a good hip heist or X-guard sweep. We enjoy all that stuff. Then there are a double handful of techniques that bridge the gap — that excite every single person in the arena, every fight fan at the bar, and every keyboard warrior watching at home.

In the interest of finding common ground with all fans of this crazy fad that is ultimate fighting, we present to you this not-at-all exhaustive list of moves that seem more likely to be pulled off with an XBoX controller, rather than by a human being who is bound by the laws of physics.

Come one in past the jump, and let’s talk about the kinds of moves that make everyone jump up and spill their beer.

Special thanks to MMA-Core, IronForgesIron, mmaGIF, UpstandingCitizens.com, Tapology, Large Midget and The Forum Assholes, and GIF ninjas everywhere.

[RX]

(Props: McSluggaCrackedMySkull)

Here’s the thing about Bruce Buffer: Even when he’s not working, he’s still working. During Wanderlei Silva‘s entrance at UFC 110, the Buff could be spotted lurking behind Wandy’s team, grooving to "Sandstorm" like everybody else in the building and looking forward to the end of the night when he could tear off his suit and transform into Party Buffer. We apologize that we can only present this moment to you in animated gif form, but if you turn up your speakers, click here and stare at this thing until your eyes glaze over, you’ll eventually start to feel like Bruce is inside you. Don’t fight it. Let it happen.

(One of these men fought Anderson Silva on Saturday — can you tell which one? Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.)

Affliction’s next show will maybe be held on November 8th, maybe in Atlantic City, and Aleksander Emelianenko maybe doesn’t have hepatitis. (MMA Junkie)

Anthony Johnson’s agent Ken Pavia is going to formally appeal Rumble’s loss via eye-pokes. (Five Ounces of Pain)

Frank Shamrock says he’ll fight Robbie Lawler in November if Lawler beats Scott Smith this Saturday. (CBS)

UFC Undisputed will allow fans to see exactly how UFC matchmaker Joe Silva ranks each division’s fighters. (Bloody Elbow).

If you like watching things that are boring but sort of historic, then this video of Forrest Griffin being laid on by UFC legend Dan Severn for three rounds is a must-see. (MMA Scraps)

Anderson Silva is kinda bummed that he fucked James Irvin up so hard. (The UG)

Anybody wanna buy the Chicago Cubs? (Wall Street Fighter)

If you feel like blowing a half-hour, check out this collection of 81 amazing animated gifs. Rampage and Minowaman make an appearance! (Holy Taco)