So Ronda Rousey was on some program called Attack of the Show the other night, and the first thing we gotta say is daaaaaaammmnnnn. We’ve been hearing blasphemous claims of Ronda being a 5 at best around here as of late, and it’s time to squash this beef. Anyone who claims this woman is below a 7 must either email us a photo of their current or previous girlfriend, or send one to our Twitter or Facebook page. Otherwise…LIFETIME BAN.

Now that we’ve moved past her body, perhaps we can discuss her mind, as it is beginning to look like the witty, boisterous apparition that once inhabited Chael Sonnen has chosen Ronda as its next victim. Rousey, despite never fighting at bantamweight, is currently listed as a 4-to-1 favorite over current champ Meisha Tate, and the hype might just be getting to her head. When asked on how dangerous she saw herself, Rousey responded:

I think I am the most dangerous unarmed woman on the planet. [Looks to audience] I could literally kill every single person in this room with my bare hands if I had them one at a time. I wouldn’t do that, but I’m just saying, I could do it. 

(Kung Fu Panda, seen here at the Haywire premier. Just kidding Gina, you know we love you. Seriously, we fucking love you.) 

You see, Potato Nation? This is why we can’t have nice things. Continuing the decades-old trend of movie going audiences and critics having the exact opposite opinion of what correlates a decent film, the Gina Carano starring, Steven Soderbergh directed action thriller Haywire opened with a measly 9 million dollars. This, in a weekend that saw Underworld: Rise and Fall of Vamipirous Werewolves 3:The Awakening’s Resolution take in over 25 million and Marky Mark Action Movie #346 take in over 12 million.

Now, it is a well known fact that most movie studios save their biggest cinematic turds for January (this is the month that brought us Season of the Witch, people), but this has to be a disheartening, if not foreboding sign to Gina Carano 2.0, or whatever we refer to her as now that she isn’t actually fighting MMA anymore. Is it too early to write her off? Of course; that moment will come after one of us manages to get off our lazy asses and check out the movie. Shit, I still haven’t seen Warrior, and I watch a disturbing amount of movies.

As you’ve already heard, the critics thus far have praised Haywire for its stripped down feel and intense pace, scoring it an 82% on the Tomatometer. Audiences, on the other hand, have unanimously trounced Haywire, giving it a D+ on Cinemascore. These are the same audiences, mind you, that gave Transformers: Baygasm an A.

[*Pours first glass of scotch for the day.*] 

(Video courtesy of MSN/Fox)

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(Photo via Zimbio. And yes, this is another rip-off of a much-better article. Deal with it.)

By Ben Goldstein

Tomorrow marks the long-delayed theatrical release of Haywire, a movie we’ve been huffing and puffing about since 2009. Obviously, the only reason we care about this film is because of its lead actress, Gina Carano. If you’re a regular reader of CagePotato.com — or any MMA site for that matter — you’re already fully aware of who Gina Carano is. But maybe you’re here by accident, or because you found one of our articles while looking for information on the movie. (And if that’s the case, we welcome you. Some of our most loyal readers came to us through random late-night searches for “How do I get traps like Tom Hardy in Warrior?“)

At any rate, you may be wondering, “Who is this mysterious brunette with the gravelly voice? And why haven’t I heard of her before?” Great questions, my new friend. Let’s run it down…

Who is Gina Carano?
Gina Carano is a Muay Thai kickboxer turned MMA fighter turned actress. She also did a stint as an American Gladiator in 2008, where she was feared for her brutality towards old people. And now she’s starring in an action flick called Haywire, in which she plays Mallory Kane, a super-spy betrayed by her own team. The movie hits theaters on Friday.

Has she been in other movies before this one?
Technically, yes. In 2009, she appeared in a low-budget street-fighting movie called Blood and Bone, along with Michael Jai White, Kimbo Slice, and Bob Sapp. Other than that, Gina’s entertainment resume is limited to video games and reality shows.

So how did an athlete with virtually zero movie experience get cast in the lead role of a prominent action movie?

(“I’d like you to go in there and switch outfits with Ewan. And that’s not a suggestion if you ever want to work in Hollywood again.”)

We had some somewhat hilarious (and many, many more not so hilarious) entries in last week’s Haywire caption contest, but unfortunately for everyone else who wanted a shirt with a picture of Gina Carano choking out Michael Fassbender on it, there can only be one winner.

First, let’s take a look at our runners up, who win nothing but the satisfaction of knowing they made someone nearly laugh kinda smile with something they posted on the Internet.

Here are some of our *other* favorites in no particular order:

Kid Clam Curtains:
Steven: “…so you combine the two words and you get the term ‘gunt’.”
.
Gina: “Haha NOW it makes sense.”
.
Ewan: “Wait, I still don’t get it.”

Tyr:
Ewan McGregor: “Ooohhh you beat up people for a living, i thought you said beat off…. Well this is awkward.”

NomadRip:
Soderbergh: “Seriously. That guy that just left. Paxton or Pullman? I have no idea.”

scottdy:
“You realize I could kill you and the chick with the scarf in the blink of any eye?”

shatterproof:
Gina Carano and Ewan McGregor meet a young jewish boy riddled with cancer. Another wish fulfilled.

Check out the winner after the jump.

(Video courtesy of YouTube/opieradio)

It’s funny, the Gina Carano real doll we bought Ben for Christmas says the same three phrases Gina said to morning radio crash test dummy Jim Norton before choking him out on today’s episode of The Opie and Anthony Show.

“I’m just gonna squeeze your throat real quick. I love that I have heels on. It makes it so much easier.”

The difference is, the doll doesn’t make you look like Marty Feldman… or maybe it does, in which case, forget we mentioned it.

(Oh, Ronda, you really might want to consider keeping that beautiful mouth shut for a while.) 

Ronda Rousey is a dead woman walking, ladies and gentlemen. In the midst of preparing for her title shot against newly crowned Strikeforce women’s bantamweight champion Meisha Tate, you’d think the Olympic Judoka’s focus would remain solely on the tassk at hand. But apparently Ms. Rousey is taking a book out of Chael Sonnen’s chapter, as she is stirring up some serious shit with former Strikeforce women’s featherweight champion Cristiane Santos.

It all began when “Cyborg” tested positive for steroids in the wake of her 16 second victory over Hiroko Yamanaka, which gave Ronda all the ammunition she needed to lob a hell storm of insults at the former champ. But Cyborg, who was somehow able to find a working computer WITH internet access in Brazil, recently tweeted the following photo as a warning to Rousey:

For those of you who don’t speak Goldbergian Japanese, Cyborg’s tweet reads: Next victim…Ronda!! No mercy!!

Now, where that tweet would have been enough to make most of us kiss our loved ones goodbye and flee the country in fear, it only fueled the fire for Rousey, who responded:

(Video courtesy of YouTube/InsideMMA)

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(“Avehay ouyay eensay atwhay wanehay is earingway?” “I owknay. I inkthay atthay is ymay arfscay.” “Guys, I know pig latin. And Gina, you can have your scarf back after the premiere.”)

The fine folks at Relativity Media have generously offered us a Haywire prize-pack to give away to one lucky reader who comes up with the best caption for the photo above.

The rules are simple: post your best (or worst) subtitle for the candid shot of Gina Carano, Ewan McGregor and Steven Soderbergh  above from last week’s premiere for the film in the comment section by 6:00 pm ET today for your chance to take home some swag from the movie including a Haywire t-shirt, bracelet and mini-poster. One entry per reader. The winner will be announced Monday.

(I’m only posting this photo because Bill Paxton is one of the greatest American character actors of the last 30 years. That’s Bill Paxton, right? Or is it Bill Pullman. I can never keep those two straight. Anyway, daaaaaamn.)

While reporting on the New York premiere of Haywire for Fightlinker, author Matthew Polly landed a one-on-one interview with star Gina Carano, in which he got Gina to confirm what we all suspected — that you’re not hearing her actual voice in the film:

POLLY: [W]hen I was listening to the movie your voice sounded a little different to me. I know this has been brought up in other media outlets but I didn’t know if they tweaked the sound or that’s just how it came out in the movie.

GINA: Yeah absolutely and I’m surprised that hasn’t come up sooner. Stephen Soderberg wanted Mallory Kane [the character she plays in the movie] to be a completely different entity than Gina Carano. So he definitely went in and I went in to AVR and he did some tweaking. We all knew that that was going to come up because people know me so well in the MMA world. But he is quite a genius in what he has created and it still was an honor to be a part of it.

(Props: Hulu via CinemaAssassin)

…in which Gina Carano and Channing Tatum meet in a diner, and try to kill each other. If you have small children, please send them outside for a while. Elephant in the room time: They dubbed Gina’s voice, right? Ah well.

(Video courtesy of Access Hollywood)

Access Hollywood was on hand at last week’s Haywire premiere in Hollywood and got the chance to speak with a few members of the film’s cast, including its star, Gina Carano.

Channing Tatum, Bill Paxton and Obi Wan Kenobi all had great things to say about first-time actress, Carano. Hopefully the buttering up they gave her doesn’t persuade her to turn her back on MMA forever in favor of craft services and private posh trailers.

(I bet even those scientists from the future who put me together couldn’t have predicted that old #643227 would become a future champion!) 

Success is a double edged sword. On one hand, it brings fame, fortune, and an immeasurable sense of self confidence, one that can only be gained by the awareness that you are truly the best at what you do. On the other, it brings crushing, tireless scrutiny from everyone around you, including those who helped build you up in the first place. And it is when you allow those naysayers to affect your daily routine, your mental state, or, in Christiane “Cyborg” Santos‘ case, your training regimen, that you have begun the inevitable fall from grace that follows.

Ever since her introduction to the public MMA circuit, Santos was looked at as a fighter who was simply on another level than that of her female counterparts. Her strength, striking ability, and general physique was shocking to even the most devoted MMA fans, and after she handled Gina Carano to take the Strikeforce women’s featherweight title, we knew she would be there for a long, long time.

And as with any case of athletic dominance, steroid accusations were immediately lobbed at the champ. Though there was little evidence to suggest any truth to these claims, pundits and keyboard warriors alike ruthlessly pursued them nonetheless. And as it turns out, behind the rumor was a fair bit of truth.

(Watch out for that metal thing? / Props: Maury Povich via ScreenJunkies)

God damn you, ReX13. His running gag this week inspired us to revive an old, dead CagePotato feature, in which we take a moment to recognize some of your efforts in the comments section. Will we forget about this by next Friday? Maybe. Maybe not. All we have is this moment. And now, the eight greatest comments of the week…

ReX13 on “Report: Miesha Tate to Defend Strikeforce Title Against Ronda Rousey on March 3rd” [selected highlights]:
- “If you weren’t pretty, it wouldn’t matter what you said or didn’t say. That’s why you’re getting this attention.” – Miesha Tate
- “Man, Stalin was a real asshole, killing his own people like that.” – Pol Pot
- “Wow, that Bachmann chick is stuck on turbo-crazy. The only reason people are giving her the time of day is because she’s a relatively attractive woman in the Republican party. Does she hear the words that are coming out of her mouth?” – Sarah Palin
- “Goddammit, I’ve spent fifteen years in this neighborhood trying to increase property vaules, and a whole fucking passel of kettles just moved in next door. With their hippity hop music and Tyler Perry movies…..we better get a dog, honey.” – Pot
- “Bobby Flay is kinda a douche, you guys.” – Guy Fieri
- “The Duggars should stop having children. Can they even handle the children they already have?” – Nadya “Octomom” Suleman
- “That Octomom is such an attention whore.” – Kate Gosselin
- “Fuck you, bitch.” – Nadya Suleman

ElDandy on “Video of the Day: Fabricio Werdum Is as Inappropriate as We Are and Fedor Isn’t Impressed“
Fedor’s high priest looks like every dude I’ve ever seen at a Widespread concert.

Fried Taco on “Aw Geez, Now BJ Penn is Calling Nick Diaz a Cheater“:
At least BJ is right about one thing. No one will ever accuse him of being the bigger man.

(Props: GQ. Click all photos for larger versions.)

Following up on the success of The Greatest Gina Carano Photo of All-Time, GQ has released four more photos of Gina in an online gallery accompanying their interview with the Haywire star from the January 2012 issue. We’ve placed the other photos after the jump, along with a bonus photo-shoot video that you’ll also want to see.

(Gina making sure her fighting career is dead with the help of an Uzi.)

Well, it’s really seeming less and less likely that Gina Carano will be coming back to compete in MMA.

In spite of the fact that she says she is undecided whether or not her professional future resides in the cage or on the big screen, Carano, who attended Friday’s UFC 141 event in Las Vegas to help promote the upcoming January 20 release of her film, “Haywire,” seems to be talking a lot in the past tense when addressing her fight career.

Gina told MMAFighting.com’s Ariel Helwani that she spent the past two-and-a-half years making the film and getting to know herself better and flip-flopped between explaining that she pulled out of her June fight with Sarah D’Alelio due to medical and personal reasons, adding that she wished that the media would just stop asking what the issue was.

Check out the video and read the most telling quotes after the jump.

(Can someone say SUPERFIGHT?!!!) 

It’s a new year, Potato Nation, and aside from an endless number of Mayan-themed jokes that will undoubtedly punctuate most of our content, we’ve decided to kick off 2012 with you, our esteemed followers, in mind. And while we had more than our fill of exciting brawls in 2011, things like injury curses, excessive title shots, and sudden desires for film careers left us with hunger pains that could only be satiated by the announcement of another marquee match-up. That, or one of your wife’s famous steak sandwiches.

Call us greedy, call us insensitive, but we’re the type of fans that simply must have our every fantasy fulfilled, and it is with that in mind that we ask you, our fellow fanatics, to join us in a discussion of the five fights we NEED to witness this year, if only to end a few of the never ending arguments that constitute the CP comments sections. Here are our picks…

#5 – Anderson Silva vs. Chael Sonnen

Why?: Because if we have to hear how lucky Silva got one more time, we are going to round up all of our writers and perform a full reenactment of Death of a (Real Estate) Salesman. Goldstein will play Willy Loman, the elderly and dillusional salesman (Obvs.). CrushCo will play Biff, the former football star who yearns for a life as a farmhand, and Seth will play Happy, the slacking womanizer, leaving none other than myself to play Linda. What can I say, it sucks being the new guy.

(Thank you, Internet. You never fail us. Dancing Gina Carano GIF via MMAConvert)

UFC 141‘s best moments, boiled down to 12 animated gifs. Check out the rest after the jump. Special thanks to IronForgesIron, Chas, and Unfilter on the UG.

(Anderson Silva: Like Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, and America’s Best Dance Crew, all rolled into one. / Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.com. Check out the full gallery after the jump.)

As we enter the last week of 2011, join us in celebrating the year’s most memorable images — from tense face-offs to action shots, ring girl pin-ups to gnarly post-fight injuries, and other assorted insanity. If we’ve left out any of your favorite MMA photos from the past year, drop us a link in the comments section. Enjoy…

(Click here for the glorious full-size version. Props: GQ via Fightlinker)

Actress/fighter Gina Carano is featured in the January 2012 issue of GQ, plugging her movie Haywire, and we’re finding it hard to concentrate on anything else today. Granted, we’ve seen some amazing photos of this woman over the years, but this is some next-level shit right here. Okay, Hollywood, you can have her. It’s for the greater good.

(Video courtesy of AOL)

When Gina Carano quietly slipped away from MMA for two years, many thought that Strikeforce was grooming Ronda Rousey to be the next face of women’s MMA.

Last weekend “Rowdy” Rousey spoke with Ariel Helwani about a variety of subjects and the outspoken decorated judoka who faces Julia Budd later this month had a lot to say on what makes women marketable in the sport among other topics.

Check out the quick quotes from the interview after the jump.

(Video courtesy of YouTube/MMAHEAT)

If any of you were worried (and we know some were since we read the comments here) that the reason your *former* fantasy girlfriend Gina Carano pulled out of her June Strikeforce return bout against Sarah D’Alelio was that she was pregnant, you can put her poster back up above your bed and her pillowcase back on in place of your Empire Strikes Back one.

Gina says she wasn’t with child, that is unless you’re counting Kit Cope and that her mystery illness will remain just that.

(Video courtesy of YouTube/HaywireMovie)

Relativity Media released a second slick new trailer for Gina Carano’s upcoming action flick “Haywire” today, and although it doesn’t really contain any new footage of note other than a not so surprising clip of Antonio Banderas saying he’s never done a woman before, it still makes us want to see the film that much more.

The jury is still out about whether or not we agree with their blatant alteration of Gina’s voice in the movie that makes her sound like a 46-year-old chain-smoking switchboard operator from a taxi company, but we’ll wait and see if it affects the overall quality of the film.

(Gina during her Madonna phase. Pic props: BullettMagazine)

Gina Carano did an interview recently with Bullett Magazine in which the former face of women’s MMA who is set to make her big screen debut when “Haywire” is released in January made an interesting analogy comparing her opponents to past lovers.

“When you fight someone, you share the experience with that one person, and you’re never going to have that experience with someone else—even in another fight. I always have this weird connection with them. It really is like we had sex. I’ll always know how many people I fought.”

Does that mean she doesn’t know how many dudes who have rear-naked-choked her or are we reading too much into the quote?

(Video courtesy of YouTube/Blockbuster.co.uk. Gina’s voiceover courtesy of Bea Arthur)

If you simply can’t wait until January to watch Gina Carano pretend to be Jason Bourne and you live within a reasonable distance to Hollywood, you’re in luck as “Haywire” has just been added to the line-up for this weekend’s AFI Film Festival according to The Playlist.

The best part is, tickets for the screening of the Steven Soderbergh film are absolutely free.

(“BRB….LOL!”)

Remember when Scott Coker said Gina Carano would be returning to the Strikeforce cage in 2011? Well, apparently he was lying.

(Gilbert is just going through the motions until he gets to the Octagon.)

Zuffa announced today that tickets for its planned December 17 Strikeforce: Melendez vs. Masvidal event will go on sale next week, meaning Gilbert Melendez likely won’t be heading to the Octagon as planned until at least 2012 if all goes well.

It makes sense that they would have the San Francisco-based fighter headline the event, which will take place in San Diego at the Valley View Casino Center, but the question is, who will UFC lightweight champ Frankie Edgar fight in the meantime? Since “El Nino” likely won’t be ready to go again until at least February, it’s unlikely that the UFC will keep “The Answer” on the shelf for five months.

The card will also include a women’s featherweight championship bout between Cristiane “Cyborg” Santos and Hiroko Yamanaka, KJ Noons against a yet-to-be-named opponent, as well as the return of Gina Carano.

(Tito Ortiz tells The Voice where to stick it.)

I’ve seen all kinds of crazy stuff go down at my local dive bar, and yet I’ve never had a beautiful woman proposition me by giving me the finger. (Oh, but what a magical world that would be.) In honor of Wild Turkey‘s “Give ‘em the Bird” campaign — which is definitely intended for people who live dangerously — we decided to round up the greatest obscene gestures in MMA history. Enjoy these unquestionably rude photos, which continue after the jump, and shoot us some links in the comments section if we’ve left out any good ones.

(Felice Herrig puts it all out there.)

(Cuddly New York Jets coach Rex Ryan shares his opinion on Strikeforce matchmaking.)

(The “MMA Hairstyles” shirt in athetic gray. Click here for a full-size version of the t-shirt design on its own.)

In collaboration with artist/illustrator Derek Eads, we’re proud to announce the latest semi-official t-shirt design from CagePotato.com. The “MMA Hairstyles” shirt features the iconic silhouettes of 20 MMA stars — or more accurately, 17 actual stars plus three fighters who have made infamous follicular statements. How quickly can you identify them all?

You can purchase this masterpiece for the fair price of $22 at Society6.com in your choice of eight different colors, five different sizes, and two different genders. (Prove your loyalty to the Potato Nation and buy all 80 variations!)

For more of Derek Eads’s pop-cultural work, visit his official site, and check out some of his other art prints including Cage’s Hair Filmography, Murrays, and Samuel L. Jackson “Hollywood’s Target Practice.”

(Surprised they didn’t call this one “Beauty and the Beast.”)

On this day in MMA history two years ago Strikeforce held it’s first event headlined by a women’s championship fight. Strikeforce: Carano vs. Cyborg, which featured a bout between Gina Carano and Cristiane “Cyborg” Santos for the inaugural Strikeforce Women’s middleweight (145 pound) championship, took place on Saturday, August 15, 2009 at the HP Pavilion in San Jose, California.