MMA Fighter Challenges People to Punch Him in the Face, Everyone Fails

Tag: God

Jon Jones Unhurt After Crashing His Ride, Other Motorist Not So Lucky

(Couple hours later, the owner of an Albuquerque body shop tweeted: “Affluent fighter dude needs complete rebuild on front driver’s side of Chrysler 300. GOD IS GOOD!” PicProps: @JonnyBones)

What is with these young people today and crashing their cars just before big fights? UFC light heavyweight prospect Jon Jones smashed up his Chrysler 300 on Wednesday afternoon while he and a carload of teammates were on their way to a dog park in between training sessions, according to the fighter’s own Twitter account. Jones was uninjured and his upcoming fight with Ryan Bader will reportedly not be effected. One partly hilarious, partly dreadful but altogether telling side note to this is that Jones immediately jumped on his Twitter after the wreck to declare “GOD IS GOOD” … even though he later admitted a woman in the other car left the scene on a stretcher.

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CagePotato Ban: Blaming an Injury for a Lackluster Performance and Saying God Helped You Beat Someone in a Fight


(Talk of bruised ribs and doing god’s work in the cage don’t belong in a post-fight interview)

Watching Anderson Silva get dominated on the feet and the ground by Chael Sonnen for the better part of five rounds Saturday night at UFC 117, a large number of fans and pundits assumed out loud that the middleweight champion must be sick or injured. How else could he be outworked, outstruck and outgrappled by Sonnen for over 23 minutes of a championship bout?

It didn’t take long for Silva to nullify the praise Sonnen’s career defining performance was garnering him as he announced in his post-fight interview with Joe Rogan that his own somewhat lethargic performance was a result of an injury, not Chael’s nearly perfectly executed game plan.

Besides the slick, yet last-ditch armbar-triangle combo he threw up and was able to catch Chael with in the dying seconds of the fifth round, Anderson really didn’t do a whole lot in the fight, but instead of praising Sonnen for contributing more than his half to their "Fight of the Night" awarded bout, he instead chalked it up to a rib injury he sustained in training more than a week prior to the fight.

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LOLBrock…

Brock Lesnar UFC 91 MMA God
(Props: LifeType1)

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Rampage Isn’t Guilty…Because He Had No Idea What He Was Doing

Yesterday we were somewhat surprised to hear that former UFC champ Quinton “Rampage” Jackson had pleaded not guilty in his felony hit-and-run, evading police case. Usually when there are pictures of you committing a crime in a monster truck that has your picture on it, your legal options are fairly limited. But Jackson spoke to the OC Register after his arraignment on Thursday and cleared a lot of things up. You see, he only did it because God and the devil were fighting inside his mind. It happens. Oh, and he had also been watching “The Secret,” in addition to not sleeping, eating, or drinking anything other than nutritious energy drinks:

Jackson, a former UFC champion who is one of the biggest names in one of the fastest-growing sports, said he also felt there was a spiritual war going on in his mind between God and the devil when he raced down Newport Boulevard on July 15, leaving a wake of rumpled cars, frightened pedestrians and angry police.

He said he thought he was on a mission to save a friend – who had recently lost his faith in God – and was unaware that he had hit any other cars or was being pursued by a phalanx of police cars.

“I thought I heard the voice of God telling me to go save Brian,” he said in an interview Thursday after his arraignment on two felony evading arrest charges. “I felt if I didn’t get to Brian, he would die.”

Now, he says, he believes he was irrational because of lack of sleep and nutrition.

“What was I thinking?” he said. “l know now that Brian was never in danger. …But I really thought at the time that he was about to die.”

The chase apparently ended in front of friend Brian Talbert’s home. Rampage had spent the night before watching the DVD of “The Secret” over and over again, and then remembered he had loaned a copy to Talbert, and became obsessed with getting to him to make sure he watched it. For those of you unaware, “The Secret” is a completely ridiculous New Age-type philosophy that encourages people to change physical reality through the sheer force of thought. It is, in other words, alchemy for the modern idiot. But wait, this Rampage saga gets weirder:

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Just How Troubled Is Rampage? (Pt. 2)

Quinton Rampage Jackson UFC

Earlier today, we scratched our heads over Dana White’s strange take on the Quinton Jackson situation, particularly the line:

“Last night when he got out, Rampage is very religious…yeah I’m dealing with it.”

WTF could that possibly mean, right? Well, according to CagePotato’s anonymous insider, it could mean something really freakin’ bad. Our source now tells us the following:

Rampage thinks he’s God…He had a falling out with his trainer a couple of days before the first arrest. Basically he has lost his mind and is talking very religious and is saying that he is God. This is the main thing I wanted to keep hidden, but with the second arrest and Dana talking it will come out regardless. He needs some serious help. I don’t know if you would call it schizophrenia or bipolar disorder or what have you, but whatever it is, basically it’s become impossible to have a conversation with him. He is delusional.

Again, this is second-hand information, and the only way to make a real judgment is to have an actual conversation with Jackson himself. But the chatter is not good.

Sort of related: As of now, Toyo Tires has no official comment on the status of Rampage’s sponsorship with the company, and doesn’t plan to make one any time soon.

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