MMA Fighter Challenges People to Punch Him in the Face, Everyone Fails

Tag: Harold Howard

Hilarious Boxing Update: Dude Tells his Opponent to Come at Him, Is Immediately KTFO.


(If you’re coming on…shit, where’d I put my glasses? Props to Deadspin for the find.)

For those of you who still don’t think that taunting only looks cool if the person who wins the fight does it, please direct your attention to Exhibit Z: This clip from a boxing match between Miguel Zuniga and Daquan Arnett on Saturday night.

During the fifth round of the bout, Zuniga began to finally crack Arnett’s counterpunch-heavy style, backing Arnett up against the ropes as he unleashed his hardest punches. Sensing his opponent was in trouble, Zuniga was all about trading haymakers, while Arnett was more interested in silly things like defense, counter left hooks and not getting his ass kicked. Clearly frustrated, Zuniga decided that his best option in this situation was to channel his inner Harold Howard, signaling for his opponent to “COME ON!” while he let Arnett off the ropes.

I’m not here to fault Zuniga for attempting a mid-fight Harold Howard tribute. Hell, I don’t think anyone reading this is here to do that. But…if you’re telling your opponent to “come on,” can you at least do it in a stereotypically Canadian accent? And for crying out loud, please don’t immediately get knocked the fuck out, either. Especially if you attempt zero cartwheel kicks in the process.

@SethFalvo

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And the Hayabusa Cage Potato Cage Cameo Contest Winner is….


CagePotatos Cage Cameo Contest – Watch MoreFunny Videos

We had several entries in what was likely our toughest contest to date. As always, you guys showed that you’re passionate fans of our site and the sport — either that or you just like free stuff.

Anyway,  before we get into announcing who the winner is, here are the official correct answers:

1. Don Frye in “Big Stan” (2007)

2. Acclaimed coach Shawn Tompkins (hitting the bag), Frank “Johnny Cage” Colcher and Trevor “Hollywood” Harris (both sparring in ring) in “Sons of Anarchy” (2010)

3. UFC 1 tooth loser Teila Tuli AKA Taylor Wily in “Forgetting “Sarah Marshall” (2008)

4. Maurice Smith (the fatherless bastard) in “Miami Connection” (1987)

5. Cage Potato reporter molester Quinton “Rampage” Jackson in “The Midnight Meat Train” (2008)

6. UFC founder Rorian Gracie (Mexican restaurant maitre d’) in “Hart to Hart” 1983

7. Cunning linguist Tito Ortiz in “The Crow: Wicked Prayer” (2005)

8. Rapist and murderer Joe Son (fighting Bolo Yeung) and Mike Bernardo (cornerman shouting encouragement to Yeung) in Shootfighter 2 (1996)

9. MMA legend and all around good guy (unless you accost his wife in a bar) Bas Rutten  in Zookeeper (2011)

10. MMA trainer extraordinaire Steven Seagal, Randy Couture (answers door and gets KO’d by Seagal) and Karo Parisyan (thug number two that Seagal KOs) in “Today You Die” (2005)

11. UFC Hall-of-Famer Ken Shamrock in “That 70′s Show” (1999)

12. Raving lunatic Harold Howard (wild-eyed murderous gladiator) in “Gladiator Cop” (1995)

13. Rickson Gracie in “The Incredible Hulk” (2008)

14.Stephen Quadros (dude with the animated facial expressions) in “Demon Wind” (1990)

15. Patrick Smith’s first UFC 2 victim Ray Wizard (gang leader) in “The Master” AKA “Long Xing Tian Xia” (1992)

16. Joe Rogan in “Zookeeper” (2011

17. Chuck Liddell (Boy Scout catching orange) in “The Postman Always Rings Twice” (1981)

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GIF Party: MMA Fail 101


ATTENTION PAUL BUENTELLO: Please do this at Bellator 48.  PLEASE.

“The only great failure in life is the failure to try.” -Some old wise man, probably with a large beard

Fail is sort of like porn. You can’t really define it properly, but you know it when you see it. And brother, we’ve seen some fail watching our favorite sport. It can happen anytime, from walking out to the ring, to celebrating your victory (see above), and anytime between. We here at CagePotato hold MMA and fighters in our highest regard … but we still like to point and laugh every once in a while. Allow us to present to you our first (in what we assume will be many) installment of MMA Fails.

Special thanks go out to anyone and everyone who ever GIF’d a video, including the fine people at UpstandingCitizens, MMA-Core, IronForgesIron, and MMATKO.  Props.

Now let’s get it on!

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Eight MMA Fights That Were Over Before They Started

Patrick Cote Anderson Silva injured knee MMA photos
(Actually, make that the “9 MMA Fights That Were Over Before They Started.”)

By Cage Potato contributor Chris Colemon

Your average Mixed Martial Artist devotes three months of his life to preparing for a fight. That’s ninety days of rigorous training and dieting; ninety days of mental preparation and time spent away from friends and family. That great sacrifice becomes worthwhile the moment the bell rings and he gets to show the world what ninety days of commitment can bring. There are few better ways of displaying your hard work than to shut down your opponent in the blink of an eye. After months of speculation, hype, and anticipation, you could say that such fights were over before they even began. You could say that, but you’d be wrong. That ignoble distinction belongs to a whole other category of fights. Fights that didn’t end with a winner and a loser. Fights that didn’t make the sacrifice of training worthwhile. Fights that were truly over before they began.

Check them out after the jump.

Matt Serra vs. Johil de Oliveira (PRIDE 9: New Blood)

(Who knew the fiery background of Oliveira’s PRIDE photo would actually predict his fate that night?)

MMA in itself is purely a sport, but every promotion walks a line somewhere between sport and entertainment; where that line is drawn is up to each organization. While some fans prefer the more straightforward, professional production values of the UFC, others long for the rich pageantry and theatrics of Pride. No matter where you stand, everyone likes a fight full of fireworks. Well, everyone other than Johil de Oliveira. A victim of Pride’s WWF-esque walkouts, de Oliveira was warming up backstage for his Pride 9 bout with Matt Serra when he stepped on part of the pyrotechnic display, setting it off like a landmine. He was rushed to the hospital with serious burns, setting a record for ‘most baked fighter’ that would stand until Pride 33. Johil would recover and fight again just six months later, though he still suffers the inability to shave frequently or sunbathe – a fate worse than death for a Brazilian.

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FLO TV T-Shirt Design Contest: And It Is Aaaaaaaall Over!

Caol Uno MMA t-shirt

The votes have been tallied, and we’re pleased to announce a winner in our MMA fighter t-shirt design contest, presented by FLO TV. After grabbing attention as an early favorite, tj.labs’s Caol Uno shirt (shown above) sailed to a comfortable victory with 20% of the popular vote. Congrats, buddy! Please send your real name and address to contest@cagepotato.com and we’ll get you set up with a FLO TV Personal Television, with access to the pay-per-view broadcast of UFC 115.

We’d also like to show a little love to the contest’s three runners-up, who you can check out after the jump. Chin up, guys — shoot your info to contest@cagepotato.com and we’ll hook you up with CagePotato t-shirts. Thanks again to FLO TV for their support, and please give ‘em a look at flotv.com.

FLO TV Lyoto Machida

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FLO TV T-Shirt Design Contest: Vote for the Finalists!

FLO TV Lyoto Machida
(Image courtesy of FLOTV.com)

Happy Memorial Day, Potato Nation! As promised, we are proud to present the finalists of our FLO-TV t-shirt design contest, which brought in nearly 100 brilliant entries over the last two weeks. Please study all 16 (!) of the nominated designs after the jump, then vote for your favorite in the poll over on the right. (It’s a little bit down the page, under the "Most Recent Comments" box and the Power Rankings link.) Get your votes in by Thursday night at midnight ET; we’ll announce the winner on Friday, who will score their own FLO TV Personal Television, with access to the pay-per-view broadcast of UFC 115. Überprops to everybody who entered, and to FLO TV for making this happen! 

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Reminder: UFC Press conference Live from Toronto at 1:00 ET

Will they be announcing an unlockable Harold Howard police chase sequence for UFC Undisputed 2010?

Has the UFC bought Ontario?

Will Kalib Starnes be the latest inductee into the UFC Hall of Fame?

Will Zuffa be holding an event in Toronto in the near future?

Tune in here live at 1:00 ET to find out.

(Video player after the jump)

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Harold Howard is Batsh*t Crazy


(Face of a crazy man, or just a Canadian?)

It looks like former UFC fighter Harold Howard’s crazy behavior this past December, that landed him in jail for the next five years wasn’t a totally out of the blue occurrence. The Toronto Star is reporting today that a couple weeks before the incident that saw Howard launch an unprovoked hammer attack on his nephew and sister, whom he had been staying with since October after he was charged with assaulting his wife, he had visited the newspaper’s offices in the hopes that they would expose an X-Files-like plot against him.

From the report:

“On Dec. 9, 2009, Howard showed up at the Toronto Star with a briefcase. He looked like a businessman, but his clothes were worn, and his knuckles were bruised and caked with dried blood. In a hoarse voice, he said there was a plot to ruin his life. He claimed he had been injected with a liquid that hardened his veins and immobilized him. He held out his shaking hands for inspection, his eyes wide in desperation. As he was escorted out of the building, he left nodding to no one but himself. “On to Plan B,” he told an editor before leaving.

Almost two weeks later, residents of a Niagara Falls street were awakened by screams. Howard was attacking his sister and nephew with the claw end of a hammer. His 21-year-old nephew fought back before Howard screeched out of the driveway.”
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*Updated* Mulletted UFC Meme Harold Howard Sentenced to Five Years in Prison

(Narcissism: the leading cause of MMA fighter arrests in North America)

Instead of a fight, the next time Harold Howard utters his well known "If you’re coming on, come on!" catchphrase, his words will likely be followed by prison sex and obligatory spooning with his cellmate “Shanky” Dave.

The cartwheel-kicking former UFC underachiever and my Canadian homeboy, who was the first fighter to ever defeat Royce Gracie (Okay, fine, the win over Royce was by forfeiture, but it was still real to me, damn it!) was 
sentenced today to just south of five years in jail for his pre-Christmas family festivities last year that saw him attack two relatives with a claw hammer before crashing his pick-up truck through the front doors of a Niagara Falls casino.
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UFC Pioneer Harold Howard Arrested After Multiple Assaults, Driving Truck Into Casino


(Props: jragan02)

For once, it would be nice to hear a news story about an old-school UFC competitor that didn’t involve a horrible crime or a death hoax. Ah, well. The Niagara Falls Review is reporting that 51-year-old martial artist Harold Howard — who compiled a 2-3 MMA record from 1994-1996, including a victory via forfeit over Royce Gracie at UFC 3 — was arrested last night after a Quinton Jackson-esque vehicular freak-out. Here’s what Howard has been accused of doing:

– Assaulting a male and a female with a weapon following a dispute at a residence, then fleeing the scene in his pick-up truck.

– Smashing into another vehicle in the driveway of a different residence, then taking off again.

– Evading police when they caught up to Howard and tried to pull him over.

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