3 Mar 2014 13:46:27 PM
(Warning: Language is waaaaaay NSFW. Props: YouTube.com/AlphaMaleShit)
Along with his recently launched Alpha Male Shit clothing line, War Machine‘s media empire now includes a YouTube channel where he rants in his car about strangers who he would have beaten up if he wasn’t on probation. War’s latest video blog is above, and it officially places him in the pantheon of batshit car-rant Hall of Famers like Dan Quinn and Nick Diaz.
Here’s the basic premise: WM goes to a 7-11 to satisfy a Slurpee craving, and the clerk on duty immediately asks him to lower his hoodie, since that’s become a rule in places that are often robbed. Not a huge fan of rules in general, War Machine refuses, and literally uses the phrase “I thought this was America.” Another 7-11 worker threatens to call the cops, so War Machine dumps his Slurpee on the floor in protest — you know, like a child would — then leaves. Re-telling the story fills War Machine with the kind of barely contained rage that Werner Herzog should be narrating over.
War Machine gets himself scarily amped up to obtain a Slurpee at a different 7-11 location. He leaves his phone in the car, still recording (“I don’t want evidence in case I freak out”), and then disappears for an agonizingly long two minutes. Anything could be happening in those two minutes. When he returns with his Slurpee, it’s a relief for everyone. The guy who sold War Machine that Slurpee didn’t know how close he came.Read More DIGG THIS