(Overeem, before adding horse-meat and anti-inflammatory meds to his diet.)

By Josh Hutchinson

Whether it’s Jon Jones wanting to move up to heavyweight, or everyone wanting Frankie Edgar to cut to 145, weight-class-shifting is a hot topic for MMA fans and pundits alike. And while we’ve recently covered the perils and benefits of dropping to a lower weight class, the same can be said for moving up in weight. After jumping to heavier divisions, some fighters’ proverbial stars have shined brighter, some have dimmed, and some have gone God-damn-supernova — and it’s never easy to predict which fighters will have success. Check out some notable examples below, and tell us which other fighters you think would do well with some extra meat on their bones.

The Good

Alistair Overeem

(Same guy as above, same backdrop, and yet something is different…)

All insinuations aside, Overeem is a prime example of success at moving up a weight class. As I previously mentioned, Overeem has gone 12-1-1 since making a full commitment to heavyweight, and while the quality of opponents he faced was often questionable, that is still a hell of a good run. If you take a look back at his time at light-heavyweight, the stats are not nearly as impressive. Overeem’s losses usually came at the hands of the light-heavyweight division’s top guys, like Chuck Liddell, Antônio Rogério Nogueira, and Ricardo Arona. His run at light-heavyweight showed that he couldn’t hang with the elites of the respective weight class, and was vulnerable to being manhandled by stronger opponents.

After doing whatever it is he did to bulk up, he turned his fortunes around and achieved the greatest stardom of his career, becoming the poster child for successful jumps up the weight-class ladder. If it wasn’t for some bad decision-making, he would be fighting for the sport’s highest prize this weekend. Here’s to hoping he gets his shit together soon.

(That’ll teach Antonio Banuelos to try and fingerbang Ronda Rousey.) 

After compiling a 2-2 octagon record at welterweight (well, 1-3 depending on how you personally scored the Martin Kampmann fight), it looks like former Strikeforce middleweight champion Jake Shields will be returning to 185 this summer, and will be taking on the resurgent Ed Herman at UFC 150, which goes down on August 11th from the Pepsi Center in Denver, Colorado. UFC President Dana White was the first to break the news, via his Twitter:

UFC 150 Sat Aug 11 Denver, CO Middleweight Bout Ed Herman VS Jake Shields. I like that fight!

Shields is coming off a unanimous decision victory over the struggling Yoshihiro Akiyama at UFC 144 in February. Although he was able to walk away with the victory and snap a two-fight losing streak in the process, he did find himself on the wrong end of more than one fantastic Judo throw. So you tell us who the real winner was…

…still Shields? Fine, let’s move on.

TUF 3 runner-up Ed Herman, on the other hand, has looked pretty spectacular as of late, and will be looking to build upon a current three-fight win streak that includes wins over scrappy TUF 7 veteran Tim Credeur and TUF 11 alum Kyle Noke. Is it just us, or does it seem like nearly everyone in the UFC can be tied back to The Ultimate Fighter at some point in their career? It’s like the Kevin Bacon of MMA these days. Anyway, Shields should be a considerable favorite coming into this one, but given Herman’s growing trajectory, as well as Shields’ rather mediocre performances in the octagon thus far, “Short Fuse” could be a solid pick for you gamblers, who should already be rolling in the green if you followed our advice.

And in other fight booking, or rather, fight shuffling news…

(Damn. We had completely repressed this memory.)

As confirmed on last night’s episode of UFC Tonight, Jake Shields will be returning to middleweight for his next fight, and will make his Octagon debut as a 185′er in the late summer. According to the report, Shields feels healthier at the higher weight and plans to add muscle to his frame during the transition. Making 170 has been a struggle for Shields in the past, and the difficulty of the welterweight cut was a factor in the decision.

As a UFC welterweight contender, Shields has somewhat fallen short of expectations. His four appearances have resulted in a 2-2 stretch highlighted by an anemic split-decision win over Martin Kampmann, a failed title-challenge against Georges St. Pierre, and a 53-second knockout loss against Jake Ellenberger. Most recently, Shields won a unanimous decision against Yoshihiro Akiyama, who was making his welterweight debut that night.

During his brief stint as a middleweight in Strikeforce, Shields won the promotion’s vacant middleweight title by out-pointing Jason Miller, then defended his belt in a stunning comeback against Dan Henderson. Will Shields be able to recapture some of that old magic in the UFC’s middleweight ranks? And who would you like to see him fight first? We know one guy who’s still waiting for his rematch, buddy…

(“I make this look good.”)

Sure, he didn’t win his UFC 144 bout with Jake Shields, but that didn’t mean Yoshihiro Akiyama went down without a sexy fight.

Although he wasn’t able to capitalize on the positions he created with his superior judo throws, “Sexyama” made the normally sedate Japanese crowd “ahhhh” in unison with these two tosses.

(Props: Getty Images/UFC.com)

Admit it: When Mark Hunt first caught Cheick Kongo with a counter left, you were excited. When Hunt chased Kongo down and dropped him with a series of fight-ending straight rights, you cheered. No matter how much money you bet on Kongo to win, you couldn’t help but buy into the feel-good story that has been Mark Hunt’s UFC run. To see the same Mark Hunt who only earned a shot in the UFC due to the PRIDE buyout- the guy who Dana White offered to pay to just walk away from the UFC before being submitted by Sean McCorkle- thoroughly outclass one of the heavyweight division’s best kickboxers is a testament to his newfound dedication to the sport. The fact that he’s thirty seven years old only makes it all the more remarkable.

Mark Hunt improves to 8-7, marking the first time he’s had a winning record in the sport since his record was 5-4 in 2008. Although his hopes for either a title shot or a fight on next week’s Australia card are both pretty optimistic (to put it mildly), Hunt clearly demonstrated that he’s ready for stiffer competition. As for Cheick Kongo, this loss shouldn’t hurt his standing with the UFC- he was already a gatekeeper to begin with. We already knew that he wasn’t a serious contender for the heavyweight championship- the way he was outclassed by Mark Hunt’s striking and his inability to get Hunt on the ground proved it.

(They’re both dangerous on the mat and on their feet. They’re both impossible to finish. But hell will freeze over before they both wear suits on the same day. / Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle. For more photos from this gallery, click here.)

Konichiwa, bitches, and welcome to our liveblog presentation of the UFC 144 pay-per-view card. We’ve got seven more fights to go at the Saitama Super Arena in Japan, leading up to the headlining lightweight title bout between Frankie Edgar and Ben Henderson. Along the way, Anthony “Showtime” Pettis will try to invent a new kick against Joe Lauzon, Yoshihiro Akiyama makes his last sexy stand against Jake Shields, and Quinton “Rampage” Jackson defends his old PRIDE turf against Ryan Bader.

Handling play-by-play for this leg of our journey is Anthony Gannon, who will be throwin’ down results after the jump starting at 10 p.m. ET. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and let your voice be heard in the comments section. As was predicted in the ancient fart scrolls, this is gonna be one hell of a night.

This Saturday will mark the UFC’s triumphant return to Japan for the first time in 11 years, and what a card we have in store. Aside from Frankie Edgar fighting someone not named B.J. Penn or Gray Maynard (not that we were complaining), UFC 144 also offers a light heayweight sure to be slugfest between Quinton “Rampage” Jackson and Ryan Bader, Yoshihiro Akiyama’s welterweight debut against Jake Shields, and Mark Hunt vs. Cheick Kongo.

The seven fight main card will be kicked off by a battle of top lightweight contenders when Joe Lauzon takes on Anthony Pettis, and the undercard features the the likes of Takanori Gomi and former K1 standout Norifumi “Kid” Yamamoto, each attempting to rebound from recent losses. It’s safe to say that we are in for a hell of a night, so let’s all go get Henna tattoos to celebrate this glorious milestone.

Check out the pre-fight press conference video above, which, aside from the occasional translation flub, goes off without a hitch. Just a warning: due to the fact that everything is being translated into Japanese as it is being said, it is difficult to understand the questions at hand every so often. But honestly, who gives a shit? THE UFC IS BACK IN JAPAN, BABY!!!

While we’re discussing how awesome Japan is, join us after the jump for the anime-style trailer for UFC 144, which is easily the coolest thing you will see all day, and possible ever.

(“Tell me you aren’t going to miss this shit, bro.”)

Our friends at Kimura.se caught up with Jake Shields ahead of his UFC 144 fight with Yoshihiro Akiyama Saturday in Japan and they asked the Team Cesar Gracie fighter whether or not he thinks his teammate Nick Diaz will follow through on his plan to retire.

(Video courtesy of Sapo/IronForgesIron)

If your cable provider doesn’t offer Fuel and you missed the UFC 144 countdown show last night, not to worry, we got you covered again.

It’s been a quiet week media-wise for the event, mostly because the majority of the fighters on the card and the few reporters planning on attending the show have been travelling to Japan. It seems like more focus of MMA news this week has been on the upcoming Strikeforce card, which is curious considering Saturday night’s event is a decent one.

Enjoy it. After this event and UFC: Alves vs. Kampmann on March 2, there won’t be another show until UFC: Sweden on April 14. That’s a six week stretch without a UFC show. At least our wives will be happy.

Anyway, this countdown show was a decent one. It’s interesting to hear guys like ‘Rampage’ and Akiyama talk about the difference between the North American and Japanese crowds, especially when it was like comparing apples to oranges between PRIDE and the UFC. Now we’ll finally get to see the disparity first hand.

I think I was most impressed with the level of respect Akiyama showed his opponent, Jake Shields, whom he praised for his skill level and fight smarts. It’s rare to see that in a pre-fight interview. He even found a way to make boring and conservative sound better by saying that Jake “isn’t explosive.” ’Sexyama’ could sell a Kia to a BMW enthusiast.

Check out part two after the jump.

(Similar to Georges St.Pierre, MMA pundits, and most fans heading into UFC 129, Dana White was looking right past Jake Shields.)

2011 is approaching it’s final hour, Potato Nation, and when we typically take a look back at the year that was, we often lump things in terms of the very best, and more often than not, the very worst. But even though it has been arguably the biggest year in the sport’s History, it hasn’t gone without it’s fair share of snoozefests, sparring matches, and fights that simply didn’t live up to their own hype. For every Rua/Hendo, there was a Torres/Banuelos, so to speak, that kept us from having a full-on Chuck Liddell style freak out. It’s not that these fights made us angry, it’s just that they failed to make us feel anything.

In a way, they were actually a good thing for the sport, as they raised our appreciation for the epic slugfests, the back and forth brawls, and the technical battles to new heights. So it is for these unsung heroes that we bring you The Ten Most Forgettable Fights of 2011, presented in chronological order.

#10: Jacob Volkmann vs. Antonio Mckee

We know what you’re thinking, Potatoites, you’re thinking, “My God, it’s only been a year since this clown (dis)graced the UFC with that performance?” Well the answer is yes, and almost to the exact date. On January 1st at UFC 125, Anthony Mckee made his long awaited debut in the UFC. And when we say “long awaited,” we mean by none other than Mckee himself. You see, Anthony Mckee followed the James Toney method of trolling his way into the UFC through a shitstorm of self absorbed and ridiculous claims, despite only claiming seven finishes in his previous thirty contests. Well, DW took the bait, and threw Mckee humble wrestler and future threat to Homeland Security, Jacob Volkmann, for his big debut.

(“Take that, logic!”)

With a pair of decisive losses in his last two Octagon appearances, Jake Shields‘s career is at a crossroads. He could try to scrape his way back up the welterweight ladder — starting with his fight against Yoshihiro Akiyama at UFC 144 — or he could try to re-invent himself completely. Since his homey Nick Diaz is now competing for interim titles in the same weight class, it’s clear which way he’s leaning:

“I would have no problem fighting there,” Shields told MMAWeekly.com in regards to returning to 185 pounds. “It’s something I’ve thought about before and I was thinking about it (before) this fight, but they offered me this fight (and) I took it. Especially with my teammate, Nick Diaz, challenging for the welterweight title, it’s definitely in the back of my mind going up to 185 (pounds)…I’d fight sparring partners, but (Nick and I) are different. We trained together for, like, 11 years; so it’s a little different.”

So who does Shields have his eye on, hypothetically, at 185? Hint: It’s the same guy he’s always wanted — Anderson Silva. Oh Jake, you crazy dreamer. Here’s what he told MMAFightCorner:

With the recent allegations aimed at former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky, the sports world has been thrown into a bit of chaos in the past few weeks. The story, which has undoubtedly tarnished the legacy of not only the college itself but also its legendary football coach Joe Paterno, is one of the most shocking and disturbing events to surface in the history of competitive sports.

Amidst the scandal coach Paterno had announced that he planned to retire at the end of the season, but it turns out Penn State had other, more immediate plans in mind. And though Sandusky’s fate has yet to be determined, we can only hope that it involves Pinhead levels of torture. Unfortunately the sad fact is, it often takes a wrongdoing such as Sandusky’s in order to open our collective eyes to the world around us and take action to try and ensure that it never happens again. It is with this in mind that we bring you ten of the biggest skeletons in MMA’s closet.

Whether or not we’ll actually try to do anything but mock them is yet to be determined.

Check out ten of the dirty little not-so-secrets of MMA’s past after the jump.

(Will one of these two men find themselves unemployed with a loss against the other?)

The UFC has added a second bout to its return to Japan on February 26 for UFC 144.

According to UFC president Dana White, joining a main event lightweight championship bout between Frankie Edgar and Benson Henderson on the card will be a welterweight showdown between former Strikeforce middleweight champion Jake Shields and Japanese fan favorite Yoshihiro Akiyama, who will be make his 170-lb debut that night.

(“What is he doing with his face? Is that supposed to intimidate me?”)

According to a report by MMAMatrix.com, a welterweight match-up between Jake Ellenberger and Diego Sanchez is in the works for UFC 141 December 30 in Las Vegas.

Ellenberger leapfrogged to the front of the line of UFC welterweight contenders with his first-round knockout of Jake Shields at UFC Fight Night: Shields vs. Ellenberger two weeks ago. As such, it’s likely that the winner of the bout, if it happens, will be second in line behind Nick Diaz to face the winner of the UFC 137 showdown between Georges St-Pierre and Carlos Condit on October 29.

Ultimate Fight Night 25 provided us with a good deal of highlights this past weekend, but while you were watching Jake Shields trying to single leg Kevin Mulhall or Alan Belcher beat the tar out of Jason Macdonald, you may have overlooked the textbook kimura sweep that Lance Benoist pulled on Matt Riddle in the first round of their Fight of the Night earning scrap. Personally, it was my favorite highlight of the fight, and I loves me some broken noses.

(Video courtesy of YouTube/UFC)

Dana White is back with another instalment of his acclaimed retrospective video series and we’re starting to notice a pattern here. The UFC president seems to be phoning it it these days, appearing sparingly in the videos and filling the remainder up with footage from previous events, which is false advertising considering this was supposed to be the UFC 135 Video Blog 1.

The Cliff’s Notes of what we learned this episode is after the jump.

As expected, only a small handful of you were insane enough to suggest that Jake Ellenberger would smoke Jake Shields in 53 seconds. I still can’t believe it myself. (Neither could Shields, for that matter.) But in the end, only two CagePotato fight-pickers predicted the quick TKO stoppage in Shields vs. Ellenberger and Court McGee’s unanimous decision over Dongi Yang, scoring themselves Warrior movie passes and other goodies in the process. They were…

Our thoughts exactly. Props: MMAMania

Coming into last night’s UFC Fight Night 25, Jake Shields was in a lose-lose situation. He was presented with an opponent, Jake Ellenberger, who was facing his first real step up in competition. A victory over him wouldn’t necessarily propel Shields back to the top of the welterweight division. If Jake Shields lost, well, Jake Shields isn’t going to lose this one so let’s not worry about it. Last night was going to be Jake Shield’s first step towards living up to the hype that surrounded him when he entered the UFC and getting back in the mix for a shot at the welterweight title. There was only one problem: That didn’t happen. In just under one minute, Jake Ellenberger practically ended the Jake Shields era.

This isn’t to say that it’s over for Jake Shields, or that he still can’t work his way back to relevance in the welterweight division. But it’s certainly over for the myth that Jake Shields is still one of the top fighters out there. Last night, Jake Shields couldn’t implement his game plan because Jake Ellenberger was able to stuff his takedown attempts. It wasn’t “What did Shields do wrong”; it was what Ellenberger did right. He was the better fighter, plain and simple. And let’s not entertain the thought of “early stoppage” any more than we had to after hearing Jake Shields imply it last night. When you take a knee directly to the chin, immediately turtle up, and then try to grapple with the referee who pulls your opponent off of you, you have no business saying that the fight was stopped early. If you didn’t think Shields was out when you first watched that fight, watch it again while you still can.

All 53 seconds of Jake Shields vs. Jake Ellenberger, from last night’s UFC Fight Night 25/Battle on the Bayou event. Check it out while it lasts.

(Man, you know Dana’s heart isn’t in this one when he can’t even be bothered to put on a funky t-shirt. / Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle. For more photos from this album, click here.)

We told you why you should watch, and we told you how we think it’ll go down. At this point, it’s in God’s hands.

Tonight in New Orleans, Jake Shields and Jake Ellenberger will lock horns in a pivotal welterweight contest. Will Shields shows flashes of his old submission-machine self, or will Ellenberger spoil the party in the Big Easy?

Plus: Middleweights Alan Belcher and Jason MacDonald kick off the main card, and Court McGee and Jonathan Brookins take the next steps in their post-TUF careers. Meanwhile on pay-per-view, Floyd Mayweather Jr. is boxing Victor Ortiz, and hell, maybe we’ll give you updates on that one as well.

Live round-by-round updates from the Spike TV broadcast of “UFC Fight Night: Shields vs. Ellenberger” will be piling up after the jump starting at 9 p.m. ET. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest. Here, we, go.

Pictured: Seth giving Jared a tour of Louisiana.

Ultimate Fight Night 25 goes down tonight in New Orleans, and all that hot sauce and bourbon has whipped us into a fight picking frenzy. Representing the home team will be Louisiana’s own Seth Falvo, who will be doing battle against Head to Head newbie (read: loser) Jared “DangadaDang” Jones. Which Jake will reign supreme? Will it be a good night for The Ultimate Fighter, or a complete disaster? Will the stars of Swamp People get roped into a video interview with Joe Rogan? Find out all this and more, and then tell us what we forgot in the comments section.

Let’s skip the foreplay: Shields or Ellenberger, who ya got?

JJ: As unimpressed as I’ve been with Jake Shields’ UFC career thus far, I just can’t see how Ellenberger wins this one. Though his submission defense looked great, his takedown defense looked pretty exploitable against Carlos Eduardo Rocha, and if Dan Henderson can’t knock out Shields, then it ain’t happening, homie. I got Shields by UD in a match that I forget about quicker than every Saturday Night Live sketch of the past 10 years. The real question is, will the recent loss of Shields’ father have an effect on his game plan?

SF: In any other city, I’d be inclined to agree with you, Jared. But this is New Orleans. A city where the underdog has recently been able to thrive. A city renowned for its Voodoo culture. And, as anyone who has had one too many hand grenades and went home with a dress wearing local they found on Bourbon Street can tell you, a city where not everything is what it seems. Not that that’s ever happened to me or anything.

You’re only as good as your last fight. When we last saw Jake Shields, he was completely unable to take Georges St. Pierre to the ground and didn’t fare better trading punches with the champion until he managed to steal the fifth round. Jake Ellenberger, meanwhile, dominated Sean Pierson in a fight he took on only seventeen days notice. When you add on not only the death of Jake Shield’s father, but also that other distraction Team Cesar Gracie has been dealing with, it’s possible that Jake Shields isn’t as focused as he needs to be. This one has the potential to get interesting. Maybe not “Ellenberger pulls off the upset” interesting, but at least “watchable while sober” interesting.

(McGee vs. Yang, the middleweight showdown that UFC fans have been…wait a minute, remind me again who Yang is?)

Unless you’re one of those Bud Light ‘Battle on the Bayou’ contest winners, you’re probably not overly excited about Saturday’s “Shields vs. Ellenberger” UFC event on Spike. Boxing already has Saturday night locked up, with Floyd Mayweather‘s ring-return against 24-year-old WBC Welterweight champ Victor Ortiz, and it feels like UFC Fight Night 25 will be an overlooked prelude to next week’s Jones vs. Rampage card.

But let’s not admit defeat so soon. We’ll be liveblogging the Shields vs. Ellenberger main card on CagePotato.com starting at 9 p.m. ET, and it would be nice if a few of you showed up to keep us company. Could it be one of those “crap on paper, bonkers in reality” events? Who knows, but consider the following…

All Eyes on Jake: So far, Jake Shields‘s UFC career has consisted of an underwhelming (and razor-thin) split-decision victory over Martin Kampmann, and a rout at the hands of Georges St. Pierre. His dominant stretch of eight-straight stoppage victories in 2006-2009 are a distant memory in the minds of MMA fans, and he needs a dramatic win here, badly. Shields’s dance partner, Jake Ellenberger, has been spent years fighting for recognition, and with four straight Octagon wins over serious competition, he’s starting to get it. Stylistically, the fight might not be a barn-burner, but it could have career-altering implications for the headliners.

Just a quick follow-up to yesterday’s news of Jack Shields’s passing: MMAFighting has confirmed that Jake Shields will still face Jake Ellenberger in the main event of UFC Fight Night 25 (aka “Battle on the Bayou”), which takes place September 17th in New Orleans.

However, the event’s preliminary card has suffered a setback, as DaMarques Johnson and Mackens Semerzier have both withdrawn due to injuries. Johnson has already been replaced by returning TUF 11 vet Seth Baczynski. UFC Fight Night 25′s current lineup is after the jump…

(Jack and Jake in 2004.)

Graciefighter.com passes along the bad news:

The father of Jake Shields has passed away. It was learned that he died peacefully as he slept. Jack Shields was instrumental in his son’s MMA career. He taught Jake the values of hard work and perseverance. He was always there and was a fervent supporter through Jake’s early years in wrestling and when Jake transcended to MMA.

Jack would often make the long drive from his home to watch Jake practice and was always at Jake’s fights. He was part of our team and we will miss him.

(All in favor of seeing Anderson attempt to improve his moneyweight record, say ‘I.’”)

Since Anderson Silva has effectively cleared out the UFC’s middleweight division and will likely eventually start a string of rematches against the likes of Chael Sonnen, Vitor Belfort and Dan Henderson, we figured why not come up with a list of fights he could take in the interim that stoke the fires of fans.

Check them out, in no particular order after the jump.

(“Can you tell me what the scale says? I can’t see over my cheekbones.” Props: CombatLifestyle)

Apparently there’s this thing called the 17 Day Diet that allows you to lose your hideous gut as long as you eat nothing but Fritos for 17 days. Or something like that. I can’t be bothered to do actual research. But the point is this: It’s just another bullshit fad. As MMA fighters have proven for years, the only way to effectively take off pounds is to dehydrate yourself until you nearly die — a miracle diet known as “brutal weight cutting.” Here are some of the sport’s greatest success stories.

* Ed. note: Just kidding. The “weight-loss plans” depicted in this article are not to be followed under any circumstances, and Dr. Mike seems like a super-nice guy despite the questionable amount of product he puts in his hair.

Sean McCorkle
Lost: 55 pounds in three months, before his submission win over Mark Hunt at UFC 119 (9/25/10)

After charming his way into a UFC contract, Indiana-based super-heavyweight Sean McCorkle was faced with a dilemma — making 265 pounds for the first time since middle school. “Big Sexy” had 12 weeks to come down from his walking weight of 320, which forced him to get very familiar with chicken breast, apples, and oatmeal.

By weigh-in day, it seemed like the world was conspiring against him. “The cut was an absolute nightmare, and the commission scales were off the morning of the weigh-in,” McCorkle explained. “I told them that and the commission said they weren’t. I said I couldn’t possibly be three pounds heavier [on the day of weigh-ins] than I was last night when I didn’t eat or drink anything. So I went to cut an extra three pounds that morning. It took me two hours to cut the weight. Then I weighed in at 263 pounds and I wanted to strangle somebody.” Compared to that, making Mark Hunt cry “uncle” with an armlock was the easy part.

Jake Shields
Lost: 20 pounds in one day before his split-decision win over Martin Kampmann at UFC 121 (10/23/10)

This shocking video was pulled directly from the YouTube account of one of the alleged participants.

Good morning, everyone. We’d like to think that all is well in the world, but then we checked our YouTube subscriptions and saw this. MMA superstar Jake Shields is taking time out to sign autographs and greet fans, when an ugly scene of sexual harassment breaks out. Sure, it seems like everyone is just having some fun and it’s no big deal, but this is why we need to educate young athletes on the dangers of being taken advantage of.

If you can stomach it, click on the video and watch as MMA photographer Tracy Lee coerces young Shields into viewing explicit pictures of “planking”, a practice so suggestive and offensive we can’t even find a suitable link that wouldn’t make your computers immediately contract the binary version of the bad AIDS. As you can tell by Shields’ reaction, the pictures are shocking (and possibly illegal in the continental US). After showing Shields these hardcore pictures of other individuals performing this “planking” nonsense, Lee and her friends use applied psychology tricks to gradually erode the moral boundaries that make Jake Shields an upstanding role model for children.

It’s clear in the video that Shields just wants to please, as he reluctantly goes along with the idea to perform this “planking” with Lee, even while he expresses reservations that he could face some sort of trouble if things go awry. It’s possible that Shields naively believes that Lee and her friends will keep the footage to themselves, and his exploitation will go undiscovered. We can’t tell you how many times we’ve heard similar stories of young actors trying desperately to get ahead and being caught up in similar schemes, doing humiliating things on camera in hopes of being noticed.

“From this day forward, any [main event] that is signed after right now today will be a five-round fight.” — Dana White, 6/9/11

The main event for UFC Fight Night in New Orleans on September 17 has been verbally agreed to as Jake Shields takes on Jake “The Juggernaut” Ellenberger…”Ellenberger is on a mission to get his first shot at a world title, and Shields is determined to get another crack at it,” said UFC President Dana White. The televised bout is scheduled for three rounds. — UFC.com, 6/29/11

And so, the UFC’s new five-round non-title fight rule is immediately ignored. Considering that Shields’s recent bouts haven’t all been barn-burners, you have to wonder if the UFC’s decision to make this a three-rounder was some calculated hedging against a boring match. After all, nothing kills a good party like 25 minutes of stalling.

“UFC Fight Night: Battle on the Bayou” (aka UFC Fight Night 25) goes down 9/17 at the Ernest N. Morial Convention Center in New Orleans, Louisiana.

(Unfortunately, Ellenberger was fined 10% of his purse for drawing a bunch of dicks on Sean Pierson’s face after he was passed out. Photo courtesy of ESPN)

According to a new report from MMAFighting, UFC welterweight contenders Jake Shields and Jake Ellenberger have agreed to face each other this fall (event TBA). Shields is coming off his unsuccessful title bid against Georges St. Pierre in April — which snapped a 15-fight win streak — while the surging Ellenberger has scored wins in his last four Octagon appearances, including knockouts of Mike Pyle, John Howard, and Sean Pierson.

As you may recall, Ellenberger has been openly campaigning for this matchup ever since Shields’s underwhelming UFC debut against Martin Kampmann last October. Following that fight, Ellenberger harnessed his inner Chael Sonnen, tweeting “Jake Shields, you’re as exciting as watching a bowl of mash potatoes get cold…Your days are numbered…Jake Shields’ cardio won’t be a factor if he fights me next. I won’t keep him around long enough to get tired.”

(Look, we only have this at the top because we couldn’t find that clip of Krazy Horse telling kids to “stay in school, and don’t f*ck with drugs.”)

By Matthew “The Fight Nerd” Kaplowitz

The public service announcement has been part of American culture for decades. Popularized by the perpetually foxy Nancy Reagan in the ’80s, the PSA has taught us everything from not smoking crack to not dumping a pot of boiling oil on your face, and a whole bunch of other not’s. It has also served as a way to punish celebrities and athletes who did something incredibly stupid and got caught.

MMA fighters eventually began to get roped into this as the popularity of the sport rose; some are good, while others should be avoided as much as strangers in pick-up trucks who offer to let you see their puppy. That is why today I present to you the top eight public service announcements featuring MMA fighters. Why? Because knowing is half the battle…

8. Randy Couture VS Crystal Meth

Just say no to drugs! Randy Couture enters the battle against Methamphetamines in this PSA, because when you think crystal meth, think Randy Couture. For a video that is meant to appear sad and claustrophobic, it comes off like an amateur snuff film and loses its impact with the soft-spoken UFC veteran.

Couture has done plenty of these ads, so don’t be surprised if he pops back up on this list. Am I saying he will for sure? No, but if I did, would you stop loving me? I can’t handle any more rejection…oh man, sinking back into that pit of despair. I need some meth. But if I do that, then Randy won’t love me either. Argh, what a vicious cycle! But seriously kids, don’t do drugs. If you feel yourself losing power to your addiction, go punch a hobo instead. It’s much more fulfilling, but don’t take my word for it.

Oh, and I lied. Randy does not appear again on this list. That was the crystal meth talking.