In addition to being one of the least decision-prone fighters to ever grace the Octagon, James Irvin is also notorious for being the unluckiest bastard in the history of the sport. From poorly-timed injuries and ill-advised weight cuts to chemical misadventures and freak accidents, the Sandman has suffered through enough hardships to fill the careers of ten journeymen. So with the help of our friends at Havoc Store, we put together an illustrated timeline of the most unfortunate moments in Irvin’s MMA career, which you can check out after the jump.

Enjoy, share it with your friends, and show some love to Havoc Store by visiting their blog or following them on Facebook. And James? You have our sympathy, dude.

(If James Irvin was a super-hero, his arch-nemesis would be Dr. Fitchtopus. / Photo courtesy of fcfighter.com)

Last week, we described Stefan Struve as “one of the least decision-prone fighters on the UFC roster,” and after he ended yet another fight this weekend before the final bell, we started to wonder — how accurate was that statement, anyway? And who else ranks near the Dutch heavyweight in terms of low decision ratio within the Octagon? So, we assembled a list of the UFC fighters (past and present) who have been least likely to meet the judges; for the purposes of this list, we only considered fighters who have made at least eight UFC appearances.

[Update: After having some knowledge dropped on us by @MMADecisions, we've expanded this list beyond a top-ten.]

As it turns out, Struve comes in at #5 among active UFC fighters, and shares the same decision ratio (8.33%) as Royce Gracie. But there are 11 fighters in front of him on the all-time list, led by welterweight crowd-pleaser DaMarques Johnson, cursed slugger James Irvin, and UFC pioneer Don Frye, who all managed to make it through 10 UFC appearances without ever going to decision. And now, the leaderboard…

DaMarques Johnson: 10 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
James Irvin: 10 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Don Frye: 10 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Drew McFedries: 9 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Charles Oliveira: 8 UFC fights*, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Ryan Jensen: 8 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Jason Lambert: 8 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Gary Goodridge: 8 UFC fights, 0 decisions, 0% decision ratio
Jason MacDonald: 14 UFC fights, 1 decision, 7.14% decision ratio

(Video via MachinimaPrime)

In MMA, as in life, you never want to leave it in the hands of the judges. The same rule applies for the absurd parody of a combat sport known as XARM. Up until now, we’ve just thought that XARM involved two guys swinging wild haymakers at each other with their hands tied together, but it turns out that you actually can win or lose by pin — just like in real arm-wrestling. And James Irvin recently learned that the hard way during his depressing promotional debut against XARM veteran  Fred “Big Cat” Steen.

Steen successfully pins Irvin’s arm in rounds one and two, meaning that Irvin needs a knockout in round three to win the match. And while the Sandman lands some good shots in that final frame, Steen spends much of the third round hanging back (literally), stalling his way to a decision win. Honestly, these goddamned point-fighters are ruining the sport.

I’d update the James Irvin “Why Me?” timeline, but who even cares at this point. For further viewing, watch this XARM profile of James Irvin, where Irvin explains that he works full-time at the UFC Gym (possibly alongside another legendary UFC striker), incorrectly claims that he still holds the UFC’s fastest knockout record, and bitches about his damn taxes.

(At least we’ll always have the memories…) 

British lightweight Paul Taylor is undoubtedly one of the most entertaining fighters in the UFC…when he actually manages to make it into the cage. His ability to do so has become less and less frequent over the past few years, and it’s truly a shame for fans of a good old fashioned throwdown. Taylor was scheduled to return to action for the first time in over a year against Anthony Njokuani at UFC on FUEL 4, which goes down from the HP Pavillion in San Jose on July 11th, but word just broke that he has been forced to withdraw from the bout yet again, and will be replaced by Rafael Dos Anjos.

Although Taylor is an unspectacular 4-5 thus far in his UFC career, his victories include a most recent trouncing of Gabe Ruediger at 126, as well as entertaining victories over Peter Sobatta, Jess Liaudin, and Edilberto de Oliveira. Oddly enough, Taylor has earned his reputation and “Relentless” moniker by managing to be even more captivating in defeat, with his high-profile losses to Marcus Davis, Paul Kelly, and Chris Lytle all earning him Fight of the Night bonuses at UFC 75, 80, and 89, respectively.

But ever since dropping to lightweight, Taylor has spent so much time nursing various injuries that even James Irvin is beginning to look like the picture of health in comparison. OK, that might be an exaggeration, but if you were to peruse over Taylor’s Wikipedia page, you would find that the phrase “was expected to face” appears more times than the phrase “won by.” Sad but true, folks.

Check out the full history of Taylor’s troubles after the jump. 

(BowCap: It’s “armbar” in tard-speak. / Video courtesy of Hamwin12)

From injuries and freak accidents to painkiller addiction and steroid busts, James Irvin‘s MMA career has been a litany of bad luck compounded by bad decisions. And his latest decision could be his worst yet. According to a new MMAJunkie report, Irvin is in talks with XARM — best known as the dumbest combat sport in the history of human stupidity — and may be participating at the full-contact arm-wrestling promotion’s June 24th event in San Jacinto, California.

Irvin won a pair of fights for Gladiator Challenge earlier this year, both by first-round stoppage. In fact, the Sandman hasn’t seen the second round of a fight in five-and-a-half years, making him an ideal fit for XARM’s “Roughest 3 Minutes In Sports” mentality. But there’s no way he’s getting out of this thing unscathed. It’s James Irvin, for God’s sake. Shattering his wrist or orbital bone would be a best-case scenario. Something freaky is going to happen, I just know it. Damn. Am I going to have to watch this fucking thing now?

XARM’s next event will be filled out by the participants of an upcoming reality show that will air on the Machinima network, in which XARM hopefuls are put through a three-day training boot camp. The promotion is still looking to fill nine spots for the show, and is accepting fighters ranging from 145 to 265 pounds, including female fighters. If this sounds like a good use of your time, hit up Tedd Williams at teddewilliams@aol.com. Please, no point-fighters or game-planners.

(Phil Davis: The UFC’s leading producer of new middleweights.)

By Ben Goldstein

“When in doubt, drop a weight class” — that’s been the mantra for many MMA fighters who have hit rough patches in their careers. Of course, shaving 10-20 pounds off your body is no guarantee of future success, and it occasionally leaves fighters worse off than when they started. Following a week that saw Demian Maia, Dan Miller, and Nik Lentz all decide to seek their fortunes against smaller opponents, we decided to round up a few notable fighters who revitalized themselves at a lighter weight, and a few that became cautionary tales for weight-dropping. Read on, and let us know which UFC fighters should consider taking the weight-class plunge…

The Good

Dominick Cruz

After racking up a 9-0 record — not to mention belts at lightweight and featherweight for the Total Combat promotion — Dominick Cruz challenged Urijah Faber for the WEC featherweight title in March 2007. Unfortunately, Cruz fell into a guillotine choke and tapped at the 1:38 mark of round 1. Cruz addressed the setback by dropping to bantamweight the following year, and has since gone on another 9-0 run at 135, collected the WEC and UFC bantamweight belts, and exacted revenge against his arch-nemesis, the California Kid. We’ll see if he can make it two in a row against Faber in June, but for now, it seems that dropping to bantamweight was the best move of Dominick’s career.

(“Can you tell me what the scale says? I can’t see over my cheekbones.” Props: CombatLifestyle)

By Ben Goldstein

Tired of fad diets? As MMA fighters have proven for years, the best way to effectively take off pounds is to dehydrate yourself until you nearly die — a miraculous system known as “brutal weight cutting.” Here are some of the sport’s greatest success stories…

Sean McCorkle
Lost: 55 pounds in three months, before his submission win over Mark Hunt at UFC 119 (9/25/10)

After charming his way into a UFC contract, Indiana-based super-heavyweight Sean McCorkle was faced with a dilemma — making 265 pounds for the first time since middle school. “Big Sexy” had 12 weeks to come down from his walking weight of 320, which forced him to get very familiar with chicken breast, apples, and oatmeal.

By weigh-in day, it seemed like the world was conspiring against him. “The cut was an absolute nightmare, and the commission scales were off the morning of the weigh-in,” McCorkle explained. “I told them that and the commission said they weren’t. I said I couldn’t possibly be three pounds heavier [on the day of weigh-ins] than I was last night when I didn’t eat or drink anything. So I went to cut an extra three pounds that morning. It took me two hours to cut the weight. Then I weighed in at 263 pounds and I wanted to strangle somebody.” Compared to that, making Mark Hunt cry “uncle” with an armlock was the easy part.

Jake Shields
Lost: 20 pounds in one day before his split-decision win over Martin Kampmann at UFC 121 (10/23/10)

(Props: pedrommabjj via Fightlinker)

If you have a morbid interest in seeing how James Irvin’s last fight against Mamed Khalidov went, well, here you go. I’m not going to throw around the word “work,” but check out how wide and telegraphed Irvin’s punches are, starting at the 0:21 mark — it’s the universal non-verbal sign for “please armbar me so I can collect my paycheck and head to the airport.” And that’s pretty much what happens. Happy now?

After the jump: The brutal finish of Patricio “Pitbull” Freire vs. Georgi Karakhanyan from Saturday’s Bellator show, Junior Dos Santos pulls off a pretty damn respectable “Showtime Kick,” and the gif of Shogun tapping against Jon Jones at the end of their fight at UFC 128, in case you haven’t seen it yet.

(Seven pounds over, and dropping his shorts just in case. Positivity’s a great thing, James, but sometimes you have to meet it halfway. Props: mmanewspl)

Just two weeks after it was announced that he blew a steroid test back in California, cursed UFC veteran James Irvin was back in action last night in the main event of KSW 15 in Warsaw. And if you thought this would a redemptive performance for the Sandman, then buddy, you don’t know James Irvin. The bout was held at a catchweight after Irvin came in juuuuuust a bit heavy for his scheduled middleweight title fight against Mamed Khalidov. His initial weigh-in tipped the scales at 197 pounds — 12 over the limit — but after four hours in the sauna, Irvin managed to get down to 192, and the match went on at a catchweight — with the middleweight belt still on the line, for some reason.

Anyway, the numbers don’t really matter. Khalidov opened the bout with a spinning back kick (as he tends to do), then dropped to his back when it didn’t connect. Irvin dived on for some ground-and-pound, and was immediately caught in an armbar. The fight was over in 33 seconds. On the bright side, Irvin didn’t leave the fight badly injured, as we assumed he would. Hopefully that’s the last time that Irvin accepts a fight at middleweight…on short notice…overseas…against a really tough opponent…when he has a drug suspension hanging over his head.

…really?

In the spirit of covering real news this weekend, we kind of overlooked some fights that are rumored to be going down at KSW 15 in Warsaw, Poland on March 19. I’m sure you’ll get over it. To the surprise of absolutely no one, Mariusz Pudzianowski is rumored to be on this one. According to a report on Five Ounces of Pain, his opponent will be heavy handed British journeyman James Thompson. Fight of the year candidate? Probably not. Decent slugfest? Sure.

More notable than that, though, is that James Irvin is also rumored to be involved with this card. You may remember that James Irvin was recently pulled from a Shark Fights card due to a suspension from the CSAC over a positive steroid test. Because Poland does not have an athletic commission, Irvin is free to fight there. However, he is still subject to repercussions back in America.

(Wonder if he’ll blame Ken Shamrock for this one too…)

You know, at a certain point you’re just creating your own bad luck. It was reported yesterday that famously cursed MMA fighter James Irvin will not be meeting Houston Alexander in the co-main event of Shark Fights 14, as he was flagged by the California State Athletic Commission for the steroid epitrenbolone following his December 2 loss against Jorge Oliveira. Irvin faces a fine as well as a one-year suspension that would retroactively begin on December 3rd. In 2008, Irvin caught a nine-month suspension for the use of unapproved painkillers following his loss to Anderson Silva.

As it so happens, the Irvin/Alexander rematch wouldn’t have happened anyway, since Alexander has apparently suffered an undisclosed injury in training. Shark Fights is currently booking a replacement for the match, and plans to re-schedule the fight when the Sandman and the Assassin are available again. I guess it’s as good a time as any to update the James Irvin “Why Me?” Timeline…

(“And now *you* are cursed with my bad luck! And now I am free! Hahahahahaaaaaa!!!)

Things were different back in April 2008. Houston Alexander was still a scary up-and-comer in the UFC light-heavyweight division, trying to rebound from a TKO loss to Thiago Silva, and James Irvin was known as only a mildly cursed fighter. The two strikers first met at UFC Fight Night 13, and Irvin stunned the crowd by scoring an eight-second knockout via superman punch. The match represented Irvin’s high-point in the Octagon, as well as the beginning of the end for Alexander as a UFC fighter.

These days, they’re both trying to scrape together a career in smaller promotions. Irvin is coming off his controversial no-contest against Mike Crisman, while Alexander is riding a two-fight win streak, including a TKO victory over Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou at Shark Fights 13. And according to the Assassin via Twitter, the two will meet again in the co-main event of Shark Fights 14 (March 11 at the Fair Park Coliseum in Lubbock, TX).

(Props: Co0lie5terFunKzit. Wow, seriously? That’s your YouTube user name?)

CagePotato reader ‘destinationblood’ sent us this footage of last weekend’s James Irvin vs. Mike Crisman fight at Gladiator Challenge so that we could see for ourselves what all the fuss was about. And despite the shaky, long-distance quality of the video, two things are clear:

1) Crisman knocks Irvin onto his ass with a left hook, right off the bell. (So yes, "The Fresh One," you were right.)

2) That controversial knee that came in the finishing sequence (skip to about 2:03) was freakin’ brutal, and it did look rather questionable. Did celebrity referee Ken Shamrock actually make the right call?

Irvin and Crisman are slated to have their rematch in May. Fun fact: This is Irvin’s ninth-consecutive fight that has ended in the first round.

("When the first thing a doctor says to you is ‘Can I get an autograph?’ it’s pretty easy to get any drugs you want." Photo courtesy of UFC.com)

By CagePotato contributor Jason Moles

Coming off a loss to Jorge Oliveira in December, James Irvin returned to action last weekend at Gladiator Challenge: Young Guns 4 — and he would have gotten his much-needed rebound victory, if it wasn’t for the meddling of celebrity referee Ken Shamrock. (Seriously. You can’t make this stuff up.) Freak occurrences have plagued Irvin’s career from the beginning, and that night was no different. "The Sandman" recently gave us on opportunity to chat with him about his anti-climactic match against Mike Crisman, his battle with painkiller addiction, and his plan to make another run in the UFC. 

CAGEPOTATO.COM: First and foremost, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to talk with us at CagePotato. Tell me a little about the physical toll your body has taken after fighting three times in the past four months.
JAMES IRVIN: It’s been good for me. It’s tough, but I’ve been doing this for ten years. In shape, out of shape, and back into shape again. Kinda like what Chris Leben said — it keeps me sharp. I fight again on February 20th and have two fights in March, one in May. I train best when it’s intense and there’s nothing more intense than training for a fight.

Speaking of fights, your last one ended after an inadvertent illegal knee to the head of your opponent. As a result, Ken Shamrock ruled the fight a No Contest. What really went down in the cage?
Honestly, three weeks ago Ken turned down a fight with me, so as soon as I saw that he was going to be the ref I had a bad feeling. He kept coming back to the locker room to give us his version of the rules like this was my first rodeo. As for Crisman, I beat the brakes off this fool. I KO’d the guy and walked away before Shamrock even got there, and two minutes later, he says I illegally kneed him and it’s a no contest. It’s cool. I don’t have a scratch on me, and [Gladiator Challenge promoter] Tedd Williams says I can rematch Crisman in May.

Addiction can make the toughest S.O.B. as powerless as this guy. While many MMA fighters have had their lives and careers derailed by drugs and alcohol, some were strong enough to find treatment and pull their lives out of the tailspin. Here’s our tribute to five of them…

LYLE BEERBOHM

Drug of choice: methamphetamines
Rock bottom moment: Wandering around the streets looking for a place to sleep after he had burned his bridges with everybody in his life. When he landed in the Washington State Penitentiary for 18 months for drug-related felonies after six years of shooting meth, nobody in his family came to visit him.
Recovery: While in the joint, Beerbohm began watching The Ultimate Fighter and became inspired to fight for a living; he’d already had to physically defend himself in prison a few times. "Fancy Pants" joined an MMA gym the day he got out, and won his first amateur fight eight days later. Beerbohm is currently 16-0 as a pro, and will take on Pat Healy in the main event of Strikeforce Challengers 14 next month.

COURT McGEE

Drug of choice: Alcohol, cocaine, heroin, meth, etc.
Rock bottom moment: McGee began abusing drugs after falling in with the wrong crowd after high school, and was once pronounced dead following a heroin overdose. In 2006, McGee had managed to stay sober for five months. In order to test his willpower, he took a trip to Las Vegas and decided to order just one drink. He woke up four days later in Iowa, not wearing any pants.
Recovery: McGee has been sober since April 16, 2006, two weeks after the Vegas/Iowa incident. He began training in MMA and rebuilding relationships with his family, which helped restore order to his life. "Crusher" came out of nowhere to win TUF 11 last June, and submitted Ryan Jensen in his follow-up fight at UFC 121. 

(Props: TachiPalaceFights. Fight starts at the 2:03 mark.)

Two months after he barely survived his first post-UFC outing against Angel DeAnda, James Irvin was back in action last night at "Tachi Palace Fights 7: Deck the Halls" in Lemoore, California — and he wasn’t so lucky this time. In the main event of the evening, Irvin took on 5-2-1 Chute Boxe product Jorge "Van Damme" Oliveira, who holds victories over Shonie Carter and Mike Van Arsdale. After failing on a takedown attempt, Oliveira wound up on his back, and did his best to defend Irvin’s ground-and-pound. At the video’s 3:24 mark, Irvin’s gets enough space to rain down some nasty blows, and Oliveira kicks him off. Irvin dives back in, and is immediately caught in a triangle/armbar. Fun fact: Irvin hasn’t been out of the first round in over four years.

Maybe Oliveira is just an affectionate guy in general, but the dude lays it on a little thick in his post-fight show of respect, hugging and kissing Irvin on the mat, raising the Sandman’s arm in faux-victory, bowing to him in a "we’re not worthy" pose (dude, it’s James Irvin, you’re worthy), getting up to hug him some more, then hugging him again after a brief visit with his corner. Now we know why they call him "Van Damme."

The Tachi Palace event also featured an insane bout between TUF 11 castmember Seth Baczynski and WEC/UFC vet Tim McKenzie, which ended with Baczynski getting his left arm snapped in an armbar, then elbowing McKenzie into unconsciousness with his non-broken arm. 2010 Finish of the Year candidate, for sure. Check it out after the jump…

(Coulda been worse, I guess…)

Just two months after bouncing out of the UFC following his third-straight loss at UFC Live: Jones vs. Matyushenko, notoriously cursed striker James Irvin began his climb back to the big leagues at a Rebel Fights event in Roseville, California, on Saturday. As you’ll see in the video after the jump, it must have been a humbling experience from the get-go. Instead of a deafening, appropriately lit arena, Irvin squared off with a dude named Angel DeAnda for the entertainment of a couple hundred folks in a cinder-blocked space that was as small as it was bright.

It would have been especially depressing if Irvin lost — and he was a ball-hair away of doing just that. DeAnda starts the fight bombing out on Irvin with left hooks, but is floored by a patented Sandman Superman Punch. DeAnda pops back up, quickly scores a knockdown of his own, and starts pouring on the pain from the top. Check the vid’s 1:35 mark to see just how close Josh Rosenthal was to stopping the fight; he basically changes his mind at the last possible moment, which allows Irvin to get his bearings, work his way up, and put the stamp on DeAnda. 

("I deserve to be [*expletive*], FIRST! Before the [*expletive*] jacuzzi! I’ll burn the goddamn house down! But [*expletive*] me first! How DARE YOUUUUUU!!!" Photo courtesy of UFC.com)

The UFC shelled out $640,000 in disclosed salaries and bonuses to the fighters at UFC Live: Jones vs. Matyushenko, with Takanori Gomi coming out way in front of the pack; thanks to his win bonus and KO bonus, he was the only fighter on the card to break the six-figure mark. The numbers are below. Keep in mind that they don’t include additional income from sponsorships and those mysterious undisclosed "locker room bonuses," or deductions for taxes, insurance, licensing fees, and new sunglasses.

Jon Jones: $46,000 (includes $23,000 win bonus)
def. Vladimir Matyushenko: $31,000

Yushin Okami: $46,000 (includes $23,000 win bonus)
def. Mark Munoz: $22,000

Jake Ellenberger: $24,000 (includes $12,000 win bonus)
def. John Howard: $15,000

Takanori Gomi: $120,000 (includes $40,000 win bonus, $40,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
def. Tyson Griffin: $30,000

(Back from the grave: James Irvin yesterday [left], and in March [right]. Photos courtesy of CombatLifestyle)

Spoilers after the jump…

(Well, he certainly has his mother‘s cheekbones. Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.)

Adding to the long list of horrible stuff that has happened to him in his career, James Irvin‘s last fight at UFC of Versus: Vera vs. Jones was an utter disaster. The Sandman looked painfully emaciated in his first attempt at middleweight, and crumpled to the mat after taking an eye-punch from Alessio Sakara. It was the fourth time in his last five appearances that Irvin has ended a fight on the mat writhing in pain or otherwise immobilized. (See also: Anderson Silva slicing him up, his blown out ACL/MCL against Thiago Silva, and the DQ victory via illegal knee he endured against Luis Cane.) Truly, the Octagon has become a dangerous place for James Irvin. Unfortunately, quitting doesn’t seem to be an option.

Despite the fact that he hasn’t won a fight in over two years, MMA Weekly is reporting that Irvin will get one last shot to redeem himself at UFC on Versus 2 (August 1st, Salt Lake City). Irvin will be heading back up to 205 — thank God — to face Igor Pokrajac, the Cro Cop disciple who has gone 0-2 in the Octagon, dropping fights to Vladimir Matyushenko and James "Hey, Tuna" Te-Huna. Obviously, it’s a must-win for both guys, though if Irvin can make it through the fight without any serious injuries, you have to consider that a victory in itself.

Related: UFC on Versus 2 will also host a middleweight contest between Yushin Okami and Mark Munoz. Rebounding from his UFC 104 loss to Chael Sonnen, Okami turned in one of the most impressive performances of his career when he beat down Lucio Linhares at "Florian vs. Gomi" in March. Munoz is a perfect 3-0 at middleweight, and most recently scored a TKO over Kendall Grove in UFC 112′s Fight of the Night.

(Props: Cagewriter)

Two notable moments came out of yesterday’s UFC on Versus: Vera vs. Jones weigh-ins at the 1stBank Center in Broomfield, Colorado. First off, James Irvin made his public debut at middleweight, and my God, I would kill for those cheekbones. Seriously, the phrase "cancer survivor" comes to mind. Also, Jon Jones got way up in Brandon Vera‘s face after they hit the scale. Dana White stepped in to separate the two so their forehead-jostling wouldn’t turn into something more serious. Jones explained his high emotions following the weigh-ins, telling Steve Cofield: "I just really don’t like Brandon as a person. I just think he’s disrespectful. I think he’s arrogant. I think he’s full of himself…I guess I let his arrogance get under my skin a little bit. It’s just a learning experience. In the future I’ll deal with talkers better."

The weigh-in numbers are after the jump, courtesy of UFC.com. Remember to come back tonight at 9 p.m. ET / 6 p.m. PT for live round-by-round results…

(Don’t worry, buddy. We’ll pick you up a pair of oversized sunglasses at the gas station on our way to the after-party, and no one will even notice that thing.)

In the past few years James Irvin has had about as difficult a time as you can experience while still being employed and above ground. His string of untimely injuries and unfortunate mishaps earned him the title of ‘Most Cursed Fighter in MMA History,’ and the last time he was actually healthy enough to limp into the cage he took a beatdown from Anderson Silva and then got suspended for using prescription painkillers. He’s the kind of guy you don’t want to walk down the street with because chances are good that a piano might fall on his head and you’ll end up getting hit with the resulting splinter shrapnel.

But in an interview with Heavy.com on the verge of his return to action at ‘UFC on Versus’ this weekend, Irvin offers a sober assessment of his career and abilities that is so honest and forthright that we don’t know whether to be impressed or really bummed out.

(Alessio Sakara turns Thales Leites’s face all doofy at UFC 101.)

After a few weeks of thumb-twiddling, the UFC has finally decided that the previously announced fight between Alessio Sakara and James "Most Cursed Fighter in MMA History" Irvin will kick off the UFC Live: Vera vs. Jones broadcast next Sunday (3/21) on Versus. The middleweight contest was originally slated for the prelims, but the card’s lineup shifted a bit after Sean Sherk and Anthony Johnson pulled out due to injuries. Sakara is riding back-to-back victories over Joe Vedepo and Thales Leites, but hasn’t competed since last August, while Irvin hasn’t been inside the Octagon since his KO loss to Anderson Silva in July 2008. The current lineup of "UFC on Versus" looks like this…

MAIN CARD
Brandon Vera vs. Jon Jones (LHW)
Junior dos Santos vs. Gabriel Gonzaga (HW)
Cheick Kongo vs. Paul Buentello (HW)
Alessio Sakara vs. James Irvin (MW)

PRELIMINARY CARD
Clay Guida vs. Shannon Gugerty (LW)
Eliot Marshall vs. Vladimir Matyushenko (LHW)
John Howard vs. Daniel Roberts (WW)
Brendan Schaub vs. Chase Gormley (HW)
Mike Pierce vs. Julio Paulino (WW)
Eric Schafer vs. Jason Brilz (LHW)

After the jump: Kongo vs. Buentello video hype, plus a list of international TV stations showing the event courtesy of MMA Junkie.

It’s kind of crazy to think about it, but UFC fighter James Irvin hasn’t been in the Octagon since his 61-second knockout loss to Anderson Silva, way back in July 2008. Since then, the Sandman has served a nine-month suspension for unauthorized painkiller use and pulled out of two different fights due to knee injuries. (This is the same guy who blew out his knee during a match against Thiago Silva in May 2007, broke his foot while training for a UFC 85 bout against Rashad Evans, and once fell out of the cage during a fight against Bobby Southworth.) And yet the UFC has stuck by Irvin, continuing to offer him fights that he very likely won’t show up for. Everybody cross your fingers, because Irvin will reportedly make his long-delayed middleweight debut at "UFC on Versus" (March 21st; Broomfield, Colorado).

If he can avoid injuries or other major misfortunes for the next two months, Irvin’s opponent will be Alessio Sakara, who most recently won a split-decision over Thales Leites at UFC 101, effectively beating him out of the UFC. Sakara was scheduled to face Rousimar Palhares at the TUF 10 finale, but was forced to withdraw due to injury. This has to be Irvin’s last chance to save his job — will he return to his old superman-punching, flying-knee’ing form, or will he get hit by a bus on the way to weigh-ins?

If it wasn’t for bad luck, Strikeforce’s upcoming “Carano vs. Cyborg” card wouldn’t have any luck at all. Despite the best intentions, some MMA events are destined to be magnets for injuries, unwelcome surprises, and other bizarre occurrences. But which events have been screwed by fate the hardest? Knock on wood, grab your crotch, and read on…

*****
#10: UFC 67: All Or Nothing, 2/3/07

The aptly-titled “All or Nothing” event was the first UFC pay-per-view in nearly a year to lack a title fight by the time it finally took place.  That’s all the more disappointing when you consider that it had two a couple months out from the event, pitting TUF “Comeback” winners Matt Serra and Travis Lutter against the champions in their respective weight classes.

The first title fight went down the drain when Georges St. Pierre injured his knee during training and had to put off the fight with Serra (and we all remember how that went when it finally happened).  Fortunately they still had Anderson Silva vs. Travis Lutter to fall back on…right?  Only Lutter failed to make weight for his title shot, downgrading his “Rocky” storyline to a “Bad News Bears” one.  Instead they just had themselves a normal old three-rounder, with Lutter holding his own in the first round before getting triangled/elbowed to death in the second. What fun.

#9: UFC 98: Evans vs. Machida, 5/23/09

The event that famously launched “the Machida Era” only included Lyoto as a last resort. Originally, the card was to be headlined by the heavyweight title scrap between Brock Lesnar and Frank Mir, until Mir informed the UFC that he was still recovering from knee surgery. The main event was then changed to a light-heavyweight title fight between Rashad Evans and Quinton “Rampage” Jackson, but Jackson — who had just gone the distance with Keith Jardine two months earlier — bowed out due to lingering hand and jaw injuries. And so, the UFC decided to give a well-deserved light-heavyweight title shot to that weird Brazilian guy with the unibrow.

If you’re Rashad Evans, that would be enough to make this one of the unluckiest fight cards ever. But UFC 98’s string of setbacks extended to the supporting cast as well. Josh Koscheck pulled out of the event due to a broken toe and was replaced by Brock Larson; Koscheck’s scheduled opponent, Chris Wilson, missed the show because of incomplete paperwork. James “Born Under a Bad Sign” Irvin suffered one of his many knee injuries and was replaced by Xavier Foupa-Pokam. Yushin Okami also went down with a dodgy knee and was replaced by Chael Sonnen. And finally, hard-luck-case Houston Alexander broke his hand during training and was replaced by Krzysztof Soszynski. Later, it was discovered that the MGM Grand Garden Arena had been built on an Indian burial ground.

(Photo courtesy of Newsday.)

— TUF 3 finalist Ed Herman, who broke a two-fight skid in April with a unanimous decision win over David Loiseau, has been tapped to replace James "Job" Irvin against Wilson Gouveia at UFC 102, according to Sherdog. Irvin was forced to withdraw from the fight this week due to yet another serious knee injury. Herman was previously scheduled to face Aaron Simpson at UFC Fight Night 19 (September 16th, Oklahoma City).

— UFC 104 (October 24th, Los Angeles) will reportedly host a lightweight battle between Joe Stevenson and Spencer Fisher. "Joe Daddy" broke a two-fight losing streak of his own when he scored a decision win over Nate Diaz at the TUF 9 finale in June. Fisher is riding a three fight win-streak and most recently outpointed Caol Uno at UFC 99. The match will likely be on the main card, supporting the light-heavyweight title fight between Lyoto Machida and Mauricio "Shogun" Rua.

(Looks like somebody’s heading to the glue factory. Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Seriously, the Amir Sadollah Curse doesn’t even come close. Carmichael Dave broke the news yesterday that James Irvin, who was scheduled to face Wilson Gouveia later this month at UFC 102, has been forced to drop out of the match due to a serious knee injury suffered in training which will likely require surgery. And that means it’s time to update the James Irvin "Why Me?" timeline…

— 6/9/06: A Strikeforce match between Irvin and Bobby Southworth ends in a no-contest after both fighters fell out of the cage. Irvin screwed up his left leg during the tumble and couldn’t continue fighting.

— 5/26/07: Irvin tears the ACL and MCL of his right knee during a UFC 71 match against Thiago Silva, and the fight is ruled a TKO victory for Silva.

(Does Houston’s abdomen remind anybody else of Kuato? Photo courtesy of jhiner.)

Bad news for fans who wanted to see Houston Alexander‘s do-or-die, for-real-this-time fight against Andre Gusmao at UFC 98 (May 23rd, Las Vegas). As confirmed on UFC.com, the Assassin has suffered a broken hand and has withdrawn from the match, making him the sixth big-name fighter to be scratched from the event. According to Fightlinker’s records, "Evans vs. Machida" is just one injury away from tying the all-time UFC record for unfortunate pull-outs, which is currently held by UFC 85. To recap the black cloud that has been hanging over UFC 98…

(‘This? Just a karate tournament trophy I won in the seventh grade. I bring it to all my fights. Intimidated?’)

Undaunted by his decision loss to Denis Kang at UFC 97, Xavier Foupa-Pokam (“Professor X” to his friends) is doing the best thing a new UFC addition without a victory in the Octagon can do – he’s fighting again right away and on short notice.  A knee injury has reportedly forced James Irvin out of a bout with Drew McFedries at UFC 98 and Foupa-Pokam has stepped up to fight McFedries in his place, and why not?

#6: James Irvin vs. Houston Alexander @ UFC Fight Night 14 (4/2/08), 8 seconds

If you compiled James Irvin’s best and worst moments, you’d probably have the craziest MMA highlight reel ever. After all, this is the guy who took out Terry Martin via flying-knee, fell through the cage against Bobby Southworth, was whipping Thiago Silva’s ass until his knee exploded, and became Anderson Silva’s first light-heavyweight victim. And even with all those wild finishes, the Sandman may be remembered best for the out-of-nowhere knockout victory he scored over poor Houston Alexander at UFC Fight Night 13 last April. Honestly, who leads off a fight with a Superman punch? As crazy as it sounds, that was Irvin’s game-plan from the beginning. It’s hard to predict what he would have done next if Alexander survived that punch. A spinning-backfist, perhaps? A sudden and unexplained case of total paralysis, maybe? You just never know with this guy.

Honorable mentions: Don Frye vs. Thomas Ramirez @ UFC 8 (2/16/96), and Jonathan Goulet vs. Travis Axworthy @ TKO 29 (6/1/07) — which also lasted 8 seconds

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