(Just remember, Stipe: The bigger they are, the funnier they lawn-chair. / Photo via MMAJunkie.com)

The UFC makes its first (and only!) U.K. stop of 2012 today, with a card that’s low on star power but high on potential fireworks. If you’re reading this right now, it means you’re at least sort-of interested, and that’s good enough for us. So which heavyweight main-eventer is about to put himself “in the mix”? Can Dan Hardy string together his first back-to-back wins since 2009? Will Matt Wiman be just another notch on Paul “Sassangle” Sass‘s sassbelt? And WTF is wrong with Kyle Kingsbury, anyway? The answers to most of those questions will be revealed shortly.

Handling liveblog business for the UFC on FUEL 5 main card broadcast is George Shunick, who will be stacking round-by-round results after the jump beginning at 4 p.m. ET / 1 p.m PT. Let us know how you feel in the comments section, and refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest. And as always, thanks for spending part of your weekend with us.

On the heels of what was a hugely successful (both in terms of action and PPV sales) UFC 145, the UFC will look to keep the momentum going with this weekend’s UFC on FOX 3 card, which features a smorgasbord of great match-ups (praise be to Joe Silva). And the only way to make a great thing even better would be to walk away with a little extra moolah, don’t you think? Because, to paraphrase what Bobby McFerrin once said, “If you don’t have cash, you don’t have style, and you sure as hell don’t have a gal to make you smile.” Something like that. So check out the tasty betting lines below, courtesy of BestFightOdds, and follow us after the jump for some sound advice that will surely score you one out of the three McFerrin keys to success. And don’t worry, none of the spreads are as insane as the current Akihiro Gono/Michael Chandler odds, which more closely resemble your chances of sleeping with Halle Berry, winning the lottery, and surviving a public bus fire in the same day. 

Main Card 
Jim Miller (-220) vs. Nate Diaz (+180)
Pat Barry (-210) vs. Lavar Johnson (+175)
Johny Hendricks (-120) vs. Josh Koscheck (+100)
Rousimar Palhares (-280) vs. Alan Belcher (+240)

Preliminary Card
Dennis Bermudez (-175) vs. Pablo Garza (+145)
Tony Ferguson (-270) vs. Michael Johnson (+210)
John Dodson (-400) vs. Tim Elliot (+300)*
Pascal Krause (-140) vs. John Hathaway (+110)*
John Linker (-150) vs. Louis Gaudinot (+120)*
John Cholish (-130) vs. Danny Castillo (EV)*
Roland Delorme (-130) vs. Nick Denis (EV)*
Mike Massenzio (-185) vs. Karlos Vemola (+145)*

*These lines are taken from Opposingviews.com, which has far different lines than BestFightOdds for the main card fights. They are the only site, however, with current odds for the given fights. 

Thoughts…

If nothing else, Matt Brown may have bought himself some more time in the UFC today.

The struggling welterweight who recently rebounded from three straight losses with a hard-fought win over John Howard at UFC Live: Kongo vs. Barry in June has stepped up to replace injured Pascal Krauss against British prospect John Hathaway (12-1) at UFC 138 in November. In spite of the fact that a loss will drop Brown (12-10) to 1-4 in his past five outings, it’s likely that UFC president Dana White may spare him from the chopping block should that happen much like he did Tito Ortiz who lost to Rashad Evans earlier this month at UFC 133 after he replaced an injured Phil Davis.

I think this is British for “Your spotted dick jokes are original and clever, sir”.

When it was first announced that UFC 138 was going to be headlined by Leben vs. Munoz, we had our doubts about the card. Unless your last name is “Silva”, “Okami”, “Stann” or “Sonnen”, there isn’t really a reason to be excited about the winner of that fight getting a title shot. Fortunately, even without a compelling main event, there should still be some pretty interesting fights on this card. It also helps that it will air on Spike TV, meaning that you won’t have to pay extra to watch it. And, for what it’s worth, Ariel Helwani is reporting that Leben vs. Munoz will be the first five round, non-title main event.

The UFC recently announced the addition of a welterweight fight between John Hathaway and Pascal Krauss to the card. A Brighton, England native, Hathaway is 5-1 in the UFC. His most recent outing at UFC Fight Night: Nogueira vs. Davis saw him pick up a split decision victory over Kris McCray. Undefeated in ten professional fights, Pascal Krauss is looking to build on the momentum he gained in his UFC debut, a unanimous decision victory over Mark Scanlon at UFC 122 which earned him Fight of the Night honors. That fight also marked the first time that Krauss has ever seen the third round in his professional career.

(“I’ll [troll] you ’til you love me, [buddy].” #famousmiketysonquotes / Photo courtesy of the UFC Fight Night 24 Weigh In Pics gallery on CombatLifestyle.com)

Possible spoilers after the jump. Read on if you dare…

(Phil Davis’s latest video blog from kimura.se. Check out that river of sweat at 2:20. Nasty.)

Couple things to make y’all aware of. First of all, CagePotato.com will be providing live results from the Spike TV broadcast of UFC Fight Night: Nogueira vs. Davis, this Saturday night beginning at 10 p.m. ET. Please come by and bring snacks.

Also, before the main card kicks off on television, Facebook.com/UFC will be hosting another live streaming broadcast from the prelims. This time, we’re getting a full five fights beginning at 7:30 p.m. ET / 4:30 p.m. PT. They will be:

(Pyle insults England, Englishmen and the king’s English all in one quote. Good show, old boy. PicProps: RSW3)

Thanks to his almost uncanny ability to let down in big fights, Mike Pyle has spent most of his 11-year MMA career toiling in relative obscurity. It seems like Pyle is continually mentioned by other fighters as “one of the best” in the gym, but that exceptional skill shrinks away when the cage door slams and the TV lights come on. Case in point: His 2-2 record in the Octagon, which includes losses to both up-and-comer Jake Ellenberger and down-and-outer Brock Larson. But perhaps in advance of his bout with 23-year-old phenom John Hathaway at UFC 120, Pyle has finally found a way to thrust himself into the limelight: The Chael Sonnen way.

Indeed, Pyle looks primed to say a bunch of ridiculous shit leading up to Oct. 16, when he’ll be a short-notice injury replacement for Dong Hyun Kim. With the card set for the O2 Arena in London, Pyle doesn’t plan on making many friends that night.

(Corn’s in season? YES! YES! YES!)

According to  a report by pennyjomma.com, Diego Sanchez will remain at welterweight and will square off against dangerous Brazilian Paulo Thiago at UFC 121 October 23 in Anaheim, California.

Sanchez confirmed the fight with the website via text message:

"Lol it’s top secret jk !!! all you girls need to know is I’m fighting Paulo thiago oct 23 at 121. I am giving everything I have in the training camp this time around, I will show my fans and ufc that that last fight I was only performing at 70 % with no one to blame but myself. I have found my focus again I am excpecting [sic] a war. Luv you two awesome fans!"

(Does training with Martin "The Hitman" Kampmann help Pyle prepare for John "The Hitman" Hathaway?

Xtreme Couture welterweight Mike "Quicksand" Pyle will step in for injured Dong Hyun Kim to face fast-rising British welterweight John "The Hitman" Hathaway at UFC 120 on October 16 at the O2 Arena in London, England.

The bout was first reported by Gareth Davis of the UK’s The Daily Telegraph and CagePotato.com has since confirmed the bout with sources close to both camps.

Unless your name is Phillip Miller, you can’t expect to go through a career in cage-fighting without losing at least once. So in honor of Fedor Emelianenko’s first legitimate defeat, we decided to take a look at the best MMA fighters who still have flawless records. Whose “0” will be the next to go? And whose win streak is just getting started? Let us know your thoughts in the comments section…

#1: SHANE CARWIN (12-0, all wins by first-round stoppage)

Notable victories: Gabriel Gonzaga at UFC 96 (TKO R1), Frank Mir at UFC 111 (TKO R1, won UFC Interim Heavyweight Championship)

Next fight: Brock Lesnar at UFC 116, 7/3/10

He may very well take his first loss this Saturday, but right now, Shane Carwin is the most dangerous undefeated fighter in MMA — as evidenced by the fact that no opponent has made it to the second round against him, and only two have lasted past the second minute. As he immediately showed in his UFC debut against Christian Wellisch at UFC 84, Carwin has a near-supernatural ability to generate power with his 4XL fists. Though he’s backed by impressive wrestling credentials, he’s only needed those hands to achieve victory in the UFC, knocking out top contenders Gabriel Gonzaga and Frank Mir in his last two fights. Brock, get ready to have your chin tested.

#2: MEGUMI FUJII (20-0, 16 wins by submission)

Notable victories: Lisa Ward at Bodog Fight: Vancouver (SUB R1), Mika Nagano at Smackgirl: Starting Over (SUB R1)

Next fight: Bellator women’s 115-pound tournament quarterfinals, opponent TBA

One of the most effective submission artists in the history of MMA, “Mega Megu” owns the longest active win streak in the sport, but suffers from the same problem that Cris Cyborg is facing in the States — a scarcity of legitimate challengers. Now that she’s signed on for Bellator’s 115-pound tourney later this year, she can prove her reputation as a living legend who can do more than armbar pint-sized scrubettes in Japan.

(In retrospect, eating that gallon of chili before the fight was probably a bad idea. / Photo courtesy of MMA Fighting.)

Sorry for the delay on this one, dear readers — the Potato Index was waiting on its customary bribe from the UFC before it could give favorable rankings to the fighters at "Rampage vs. Evans." Now that the check has cleared, we’re ready to roll. So who went from zero to hero? And who went from classy to gassy?

Rashad Evans +125
Sugar’s measured, wrestling-based gameplan didn’t exactly transform the haters into fans, but he achieved something a lot more important — he beat an arch-rival and stayed relevant. Rampage can keep his legion of devotees; Rashad is getting a title shot against Shogun, so eat it.

Quinton Jackson -150
Except for his brief blast in the third round, Quinton was just too slow and too predictable. Ring rust was obviously an issue; still, we’re more concerned about Jackson’s ongoing unwillingness to do anything other than box. Those who don’t evolve in this sport are destined to get their asses dug by hungrier competitors. Rampage’s days as an elite light-heavyweight may be numbered.

(This is why you should always wear a helmet when doing yes cartwheels.)

After his run at the UFC’s lightweight title ended in bloody failure, Diego Sanchez has decided to recommit himself to his most successful weight class. On Tuesday, the Nightmare confirmed via Twitter that he is indeed returning to welterweight, and will be taking on undefeated British prospect John Hathaway at UFC 114 (May 29th; Las Vegas). Sporting a 12-0 overall record, Hathaway made his Octagon debut last January with a first-round TKO over Thomas Egan, and followed it up with unanimous decision wins over Rick Story and Paul Taylor. The kid’s got moxie, but he’s never fought anybody on Sanchez’s level. Our advice? Try to do exactly what BJ Penn did.

UFC 114 is tentatively being headlined by the long-delayed grudge match between Rashad Evans and Quinton "Rampage" Jackson. Other rumored fights on the card include:

—Forrest Griffin vs. Antonio Rogerio Nogueria, which was originally slated for UFC 113 in Montreal, but has apparently been pushed back three weeks.

— Todd Duffee vs. Mike Russow; both fighters are looking to pick up their second wins in the UFC. Due to a back injury suffered in November, Duffee hasn’t competed since his seven-second knockout of Tim Hague at UFC 102. Russow also made his UFC debut at #102, earning a unanimous decision over Justin McCully.

(Denis Kang: There can be only one. Photo courtesy of PrideFC.com.)

From international stars to local yokels, this Saturday’s UFC event in Dublin will feature another crop of fighters who will be scrappin’ in the Octagon for the first time. Read on, and you’ll know just as much as Mike Goldberg…

DENIS KANG (MW)
?Experience: 31-10-1 record, with 15 wins by submission and 12 by KO/TKO. Is the reigning Sprit MC heavyweight (80kg+) champion and was a finalist in PRIDE’s 2006 welterweight grand prix. Holds notable victories over Murilo Rua, Amar Suloev, Akihiro Gono, and Marvin Eastman.
Will be facing: Alan Belcher (13-5, 4-3 UFC)
?Lowdown: Chances are, you’re already familiar with “The Super Korean.” Kang became a consensus top ten middleweight (and superstar in Asia) after going on a 22-1-1 run from April 2003 to March 2007, but his momentum was stalled following back-to-back losses to Yoshihiro Akiyama and Gegard Mousasi. Still, the Canadian BJJ black belt is a huge acquisition for the UFC, and the most credible threat to Anderson Silva’s middleweight title since Dan Henderson. Interestingly, this isn’t the first time that the UFC has tried to bring Kang aboard; he was offered a spot on the first season of The Ultimate Fighter, but turned it down in order to compete in Korea. Kang had previously trained with American Top Team in Florida, but has recently been working out in Montreal with Georges St. Pierre due to some visa issues which are close to being settled.

ALEXANDRE BARROS (WW)
?Experience: 13-5 record, primarily in Brazilian leagues like Heat FC, Meca, and the International Vale Tudo Championship. Currently on a nine-fight win streak. ?Ten of his 18 fights have gone to decision; one of those decisions was a loss to Matt Hughes in 2000.
Will be facing: Martin Kampmann (13-2, 4-1 UFC)
?Lowdown: Who knows, maybe “Baixinho” could pull a Junior Dos Santos, and score a dramatic win over an established UFC vet after being plucked from Brazilian obscurity. But most likely he’s just being brought in to give Kampmann a relatively easy first fight at welterweight. Judging from this highlight reel, the Gracie Barra Combat Team member is aggressive with his hands and likes to throw the head kick. Still, he hasn’t beaten anybody close to UFC caliber. We don’t predict big things.