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Tag: Jon Koppenhaver

War Machine Regrets Suicide Attempt, Discusses Life in Solitary and the Story of His Extradition


(Photo via Bellator)

It’s been nearly a month since War Machine (fka Jon Koppenhaver) attempted to hang himself in his jail cell at the Clark County Detention Center in Las Vegas, and a few of you might be wondering what the former UFC/Bellator fighter has been up to. Short version: He’s alive, and taking it one day at a time.

BloodyElbow passed along a letter that Koppenhaver posted to twitter two weeks ago, describing his suicide attempt and his subsequent lockup in solitary. We’ve re-printed that below, along with his latest update, in which War Machine discusses how his extradition from California to Las Vegas was one of the worst experiences of his life…though it contained a moment of true beauty and revelation.

War Machine’s tales of woe will take you back to those innocent Big House Blog days, when he was only jailed up for a year and not looking at a life of incarceration for attempted murder. Enjoy, I guess?

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Guilty Until Proven Innocent 2

Well, the only thing that sucks more than waking up (when you expect to be dead) has got to be the letters that you have to read from your loved ones…ugh. Should be the other way around, right? Knowing that people care should make one want to live, you’d think, unfortunately it’s still possible to feel very alone even when you’re in a room surrounded by people. Now if I kill myself I’ll feel even more guilty about it.

Life is a bitch, and do you know what they do to the most depressed/miserable inmates? They locked me up for an entire week, butt naked, in an even deeper, darker hole than the one I was already in: no phone, no mail, no books, no toothbrush, no snacks, nothing! Makes sense right? “How long had you been thinking of suicide? That long, why didn’t you tell us?” Yeah, let them know that I’m suicidal so that they can lock me up and treat me like that?! That shit right there would make even the happiest person suicidal, most miserable week of my life. When you complain about it they threaten to keep you longer, and ask, “Well, what did you expect would happen when you did this?” Uh…I thought I’d be a baby again or some shit??? Be, uh, dead?!

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Christy Mack Discusses Her Condition and Posts Photos of Her Healing Face


(Mack at a gala supporting victims of domestic abuse. / Photo via Getty)

There’s rarely any “good” news when discussing domestic violence. There’s only varying shades of terrible.

Today, we have a story that’s the least horrible thing we’ve had to write about the War Machine/Christy Mack saga. Mack posted an update on her Twitter account, explaining that she’s still in as rough shape as anyone could expect after being nearly killed, but is in much higher spirits and is starting to feel like herself again.

Get the full text of her update after the jump.

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War Machine Makes First Court Appearance for Christy Mack Assault; Faces Life in Prison Without Parole


(Photo via Fox5Vegas)

Much-reviled MMA fighter War Machine (aka Jon Koppenhaver) made his first court appearance in Las Vegas today, following the alleged assault of his girlfriend Christy Mack last month. The UFC/Bellator veteran was formally read the charges against him, which now include allegations of attempted murder and sexual assault dating back to May 2013. As the Las Vegas Review Journal reports:

Koppenhaver, who originally faced nine charges in connection with the alleged attack last month, now faces a total of 32 counts, including attempted murder, sexual assault, battery, coercion, preventing or dissuading a witness or victim from reporting a crime, and first-degree kidnapping resulting in substantial bodily harm.

According to @PandulloLaw, the number of charges is actually 31, with an original lewdness charge now dropped. Also, this:

Koppenhaver was ordered to be held without bail, and is due back in court on October 17th. He faces life in prison without the possibility of parole.

Previously:
- BREAKING: War Machine Captured Alive by U.S. Marshals in Simi Valley, CA
- Three Myths Busted by the War Machine/Christy Mack Police Report

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And Now He’s Fired: Bellator Fires War Machine Over Domestic Abuse Allegations [UPDATED]


(War Machine in 2007 / Photo via Getty)

Bellator has fired War Machine after a report from TMZ claimed he was involved in a domestic violence investigation.

TMZ’s report claimed the domestic dispute involved three people at War Machine’s Las Vegas home. Two people were reportedly injured so bad they had to go to the hospital. The report claimed one victim was War Machine’s “significant other.”

A tweet from Christy Mack, War Machine’s sort of girlfriend (the “it’s complicated” relationship status was made for them), seems to confirm the report:

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War Machine to Make Bellator Debut on June 19th, Unless Something Crazy Happens


(They can put you behind bars. They can fire you for being an idiot. But damn it, they’ll never take your sense of joy.)

On June 19th, War Machine (formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver) will finally make his Bellator debut, when he faces WEC veteran Blas Avena at Bellator 96. The fight will come four-and-a-half years after the short-fused welterweight was first signed by Bellator back in early 2009. Let’s just say their schedules haven’t matched up since then.

First, Machine was fired by Bellator for suggesting that President Obama — and every president after him — should be assassinated. Then, he embarked on a brief but rewarding career in porn which ended in a punch-up at a birthday party. Then, he spent a year in jail for one of his various assault charges. Then he had to go back to jail for one of his various assault charges, which led to the cancellation of a scheduled fight against Karl Amoussou. Then, he had to pull out of his next scheduled fight against Paul Daley due to a partially torn ACL, which pretty much takes us to the present day.

Now that War Machine is all healed up, he’ll allegedly be making his Bellator debut on the promotion’s 2013 Summer Series premiere on Spike TV, assuming he doesn’t beat up another civilian, or sustain another training injury, or get cut again for simply expressing his honest thoughts. Machine hasn’t competed since his TKO win over Roger Huerta in November 2011, while Avena recently snapped a two-year winless streak by TKO’ing Lenny Lovato at Bellator 91 in February.

Can War Machine rebuild his career in the #2 MMA promotion? And what the hell kind of name is “Blas,” anyway?

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War Machine’s Big House Blog Fans Rejoice; Jon Koppenhaver Is Headed Back to Jail for a Year


(Covering up that neck tattoo before going to court would have been a good idea.)

If you’ve been missing War Machine’s acclaimed Big House Blogs, you’re probably the only group that is going to be happy about this news.

According to the fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver, he has been sentenced to another year in jail in Las Vegas for an old charge, forcing him to withdraw from Bellator’s season six welterweight tournament that gets underway in March. He indicated on Twitter that he will begin serving his sentence in two weeks and that, as per usual, he isn’t happy with the system.

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War Machine Explains Himself


(“I call this sub ‘The Prison Rape.’”

War Machine is out of jail which is sad for us fans of his Big House Blogs, but on the bright side we’ll be reading a lot more interviews from the man formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver.

USCombatSports.com snagged War’s first post-prison interview and let’s just say that it didn’t disappoint.

Check out some of the highlights after the jump.

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And So It Ends: War Machine’s Last Big House Blog…At Least for Now


(Video courtesy of YouTube/WEEZER)

It’s a bittersweet week for both fans of War Machine and fans of War Machine’s Big House Blogs. The fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver is set to be released from jail on Friday, which means the only blogs we’re going to get from here on out (unless of course he ends back in the clink) will be about his training regimens, his married life and thoughts on the world. Something tells me that being behind bars contributed to how deranged some of his deep thoughts were the past year and it’s likely that being on the outside will change all that.

Let’s hope I’m dead wrong.

Until he proves me wrong, go ahead and savor your last instalment of War Machine’s Big House Blogs after the jump.

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Instant Bestseller Alert: War Machine is Writing a Book

Our favorite MMA convict, War Machine is a free man in just under a month and when he gets out, the fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver wants all of us to know that even though his Big House Blogs will cease, he plans on continuing to entertain us with an autobiography he has been penning the past few months behind bars.

You know you’ll read it, especially if he details his short-lived porn career and his multiple brushes with the law.

Check out what he had to say about his tome and his final weeks in jail in his two latest blog entries after the jump.

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War Machine’s Big House Blog # 41: Steroids Are Safe, Bin Laden’s Alive and the Yakuza are Causing Natural Disasters in Asia


(Little known fact: War’s mother’s name is Game Machine.)

War Machine’s latest big house blog is up and according to the incarcerated fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver, pretty much everything we think we know is a lie.

The TUF 6 vet is gearing up for his final few months behind bars in county jail, and as such, has brushing up on his current events in the news. According to the beleaguered fighter, everything that he’s read lately, from Barry Bonds’ steroid trial to Bin Laden’s alleged death  is carefully propagated government bullshit.

Check out the latest instalment of Deep Thoughts with War Machine after the jump.

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