(“Did you get the shot? Good, now take this disgusting pale creature away from me.” / Check out 24 more “Awkward Dad Photos” at WorldWideInterweb)

Dana White Says TUF 18′s Rousey-Tate Rivalry Is ‘Pure F–king Mayhem Every Day’ (MMAFighting)

Champ Cain Velasquez vs. Junior dos Santos III Likely at UFC 166, October in Houston (MMAJunkie)

MMA in New York: How Did the UFC Go from Confidence to ‘Who Gives a S**t’? (BleacherReport)

UFC 161 Extended Video Preview for Evans vs. Henderson (FightDay)

UFC Middleweights Patrick Cote and Kyle Noke Named as Coaches for TUF Nations: ‘Canada vs. Australia’ (MMAMania)

GIF Gallery: The Best of the 2013 NBA Playoffs (Complex)

25 Ways to Lose Fat Faster (MensFitness)

3 Extreme Examples of the Internet Destroying Relationships (DoubleViking)

Jeep vs. Pool: Redneck FAIL (EgoTV)

The 16 Worst Coaches in Modern NFL History (Deadspin)

Online Graduates, Meet Your Commencement Speaker: Gary Busey (Break.com)

According to fight business uber reporter Dave Meltzer, the UFC is considering making a super fight between middleweight champion Anderson Silva and light heavyweight champion Jon Jones happen this fall in Cowboys Stadium in Dallas, Texas. Of course, Silva would have to beat Chris Weidman this July and come out relatively unscathed for the super fight to remain viable and Jones himself would have to of healed from his grisly toe injury.

After a recent visit to the doctor, it looks like Jones could be healthy in time for a super fight. More on that later in the post. First, the scuttlebutt.

“There is an idea floating around to try and put on the biggest show in company history at Cowboys Stadium in Dallas this fall,” Meltzer reports in his Wrestling Observer newsletter.

“The idea would be to have Silva vs. Jon Jones and Velasquez vs. Dos Santos at the stadium, in October, at the same time as the state fair of Texas, perhaps on 10/12 or 10/19. That much is known to be at least something talked about. With Madison Square Garden seeming more and more unlikely for November, this show could be billed as UFC 20th anniversary show, with the idea of trying to repeat the success of UFC 100.”

(It’s cool, he’s used to it. / Photo via MMAFighting.com)

The UFC paid out $1,733,000 in disclosed salaries and performance bonuses to the 24 fighters who competed at UFC 160, with heavyweight champion Cain Velasquez‘s $400,000 flat fee eating up 23% of the total. (Coming soon: The “Occupy Velasquez” movement, led by Jacob Volkmann and John Cholish.) Heavyweights Junior Dos Santos and Mark Hunt made over $200k for their co-main event bout — including their $50,000 Fight of the Night bonuses — while the night’s other big winner, TJ Grant, just made it to the six-figure mark.

Check out the full list of UFC 160 salaries below — courtesy of the Nevada State Athletic Commission via MMAMania — followed by our traditional rundown of who’s underpaid/overpaid. Keep in mind that the numbers don’t include additional income from undisclosed “locker-room bonuses,” sponsorships, or cuts of the pay-per-view that some of the UFC’s stars are entitled to, or deductions for taxes, insurance, and licensing fees.

Cain Velasquez: $400,000 (no win bonus)
Antonio Silva: $75,000

Junior dos Santos: $290,000 (includes $120,000 win bonus, $50,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
Mark Hunt: $210,000 (includes $50,000 Fight of the Night bonus)

Glover Teixeira: $98,000 (includes $24,000 win bonus, $50,000 Submission of the Night bonus)
James Te Huna: $30,000

T.J. Grant: $100,000 (includes $25,000 win bonus, $50,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
Gray Maynard: $45,000

(Photo via Esther Lin| MMA Fighting)

Antonio Silva is every bit the monster the UFC’s hype machine have promoted him as but champion Cain Velasquez once more proved to be too quick for “Bigfoot.” Just as he did one year ago in their first meeting, Cain wasted little time in stopping Silva in the first round, via ground strikes.

“Pezao” absolutely earned the title shot he received Saturday night – he has a list of victims that include two former UFC heavyweight champions, former long-time pound for pound kingpin Fedor Emelianenko and, most recently, Alistair Overeem – but Velasquez once more proved that the combination of his quickness, relentless pace and striking power are very hard to beat. In the post fight press conference, Silva objected to the stoppage by referee Mario Yamasaki, saying it was premature and that he allowed Velasquez to hit him to the back of the head illegally.

“I do agree the fight was stopped too early,” the Brazilian said.

“It’s clear watching it that I took several illegal blows to the back of my neck.”

It was also clear that Silva was out of the fight altogether before he hit the ground, after Velasquez clipped him with a left and hammered him with a right. Strikes to the back of the head being illegal is one of the least clearly defined, hard to enforce and altogether counterproductive to realistic sport fighting rules that exists in MMA, besides. At the least, fighters should not be allowed to hide behind the rule while laying prone, face down.

Yamasaki did his job and protected Silva from taking more damage by stopping the bout after it was clear Antonio could not move himself out of danger but before the brave fighter was beaten senseless.

Grant vs. Maynard Goes On Too Long

The referee officiating TJ Grant and Gray Maynard’s lightweight contender’s bout can’t say he did the same. Grant dropped Maynard with flush punches and knees to the chin multiple times and delivered more clean punishment to a defenseless Maynard while on the ground before the referee stepped in all too late and called a halt to the bout.

Maynard was out of the fight from the first nasty jaw shot that he took and did nothing to avoid or mount his own offense during many, many shots afterwards from Grant. It all happened quickly but when a fighter does nothing but fall over and over again, he’s been done for awhile and the referee should have recognized this earlier than he did.

The “stakes” of a fight, whether it is a number one contender’s fight like Maynard’s and Grants, or a title bout, shouldn’t matter when it comes to deciding how long a fighter should be allowed to take a beating.

(Yep. A whole lot of regrettable tats in this room. / Photo via MMAFighting.com)

Sit back, warm up your jaws, and get ready for CagePotato’s main card liveblog of UFC 160. The pay-per-view broadcast will be popping off at 10 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. PT, and your friend George Shunick will be sticking round-by-round results after the jump.

On tonight’s menu: Cain Velasquez will attempt to defend his heavyweight title against his old buddy Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva, while ex-champ Junior Dos Santos and Mark Hunt throw down for the next crack at the belt. Plus, light-heavyweights Glover Teixeira and James Te Huna put their three-fight win streaks on the line, lightweights Gray Maynard and TJ Grant meet in a potential #1 lightweight contender’s match, and Donald “Cowboy” Cerrone opens things off by roping an outmatched calf named KJ Noons.

Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and let your voices be heard in the comments section. Thanks for being here, guys.

(Photo via MMA Junkie)

MMA Junkie is reporting that heavyweight champion Cain Velasquez will earn a $400,000 purse for competing in the main event of tonight’s UFC 160 card, win or lose. “Velasquez is scheduled to make a flat $400,000 paycheck at UFC 160 with no win bonus on the line,” Junkie writes.

Of course, this number wouldn’t represent any discretionary bonuses that the UFC may or may not choose to give Velasquez. If the report is true, it might signal a major change in the champion’s purse pay structure.

It was reported that Velasquez earned $100,000 in “show money” for each of his prior two bouts (a win at UFC 146 win over Antonio Silva and a win over Junior Dos Santos at UFC 155), as well as an additional $100,000 in “win money.”

Traditionally, flat pay purses have been had by some of the biggest stars in MMA. If Junkie’s report is correct, it appears as if Velasquez got an improved contract along with that shiny UFC heavyweight title belt this time around.

- Elias Cepeda

(Cain doesn’t see an enormous head. He sees a big, beautiful, blood-piñata, just waiting to burst open and spill its bounty. / Photo via MMAFighting.com)

BG and Danga are back mahfuckas, baaaaaaaaaaaaam! [*cough*] Excuse me. What I meant to say was, UFC 160 goes down tomorrow night in Las Vegas, so CagePotato founding editor Ben Goldstein and staff writer Jared Jones have teamed up once again to discuss all the important themes surrounding the event. Which heavyweight fight on the main card is more likely to end in an upset? Should we write off KJ Noons as nothing more than UFC shark-bait? What’s a Nurmagomedov gotta do to get some respect around here? Read on, and throw down your own opinions in the comments section.

It seems pretty obvious that the UFC is trying to set up Dos Santos vs. Velasquez III, but who stands the better chance of throwing a wrench in their plans, Hunt or Silva?

Jared: ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS. The last I checked, Mark Hunt was riding high on the most unexpected win streak in UFC history, turned his last opponent’s jaw into mashed potatoes, and will now be harboring the kind of silent-but-deadly rage that can only be brought about by jet lag. “Bigfoot” is coming off an upset win over a sans testosterone-abusing Overeem, sure, but picking him over the man, the myth, the pseudo-Mexican who reenacted the rock scene from Cannibal Holocaust on him almost a year ago to the day? No thanks, my dude.

Ben: I hate to agree with this jackass — and how dare you try to persuade me by linking to a track from Primus’s underrated Rhinoplasty EP, Jared — so for the sake of argument, I’ll go ahead and say ARE *YOU* KIDDING *ME* WITH THIS?? Mark Hunt has built up a dubious win streak slinging haymakers against guys who allowed him to do so. Junior Dos Santos is far too disciplined to become another victim of the same old rock-’em-sock-’em Super Samoan routine. In a brawl, Hunt has a chance against anybody. But this won’t be a brawl — it’ll be boxing match, and JDS is about as good as they come in that department.

And sure, Hunt has scored a string of upsets against guys like Cheick Kongo and Stefan Struve. Meanwhile, Antonio Silva has scored far more unexpected and dramatic upsets against guys like Fedor Emelianenko and the aforementioned ‘Reem. Bigfoot has heart for days, and fists big enough to dummy up anybody in the heavyweight division on any given night, including the current champion. How many times are you gonna sleep on this guy? #BigfootEra

Gray Maynard vs. T.J. Grant: Who will earn the right to suffer a narrow split decision loss to Ben Henderson next?

(Cain Velasquez vs. Antonio Silva II)

This Saturday night, you can join us for all the action during our UFC 160 liveblog, but today you can prep for the pay-per-view card with these “Countdown to UFC 160” documentary hype videos, broken up into three segments for the ADD-afflicted among you.

At the top, we’ve got the low-down on the night’s main event rematch — Cain Velasquez vs. Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva for the UFC heavyweight title. After the jump, check out the story of MMA’s own Cinderella Man, Mark Hunt, as he heads into his number one contender’s bout with former champion Junior Dos Santos. Plus, Glover “Lil’ Iceman” Teixeira continues his path up the light-heavyweight ladder against streaking Kiwi James Te Huna.

(Looks like this year’s harvest will be even better. Sanguis Bibimus! Corpus Edimus! Photo via Getty Images.) 

By Dan “Get Off Me” George

This Saturday night, Cain Velasquez will attempt to make WILL MAKE the first title defense of his career in his second term as UFC heavyweight champion when he rematches Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva, Mark Hunt will look to continue WILL CONTINUE his Cinderella run in the co-main event against former HW champ Junior Dos Santos, and a possible #1 contender the next lightweight title contender WILL BE DECIDED in the sure-to-be-brawl between Gray Maynard and T.J. Grant. Whew.

With one of the strongests undercards (on paper) in what feels like an eternity, UFC 160 is primed to become, at the very least, a night chock full of wild finishes and entertaining scraps that will leave *no fan* unsatisfied. I really hope I’m not overselling it. Anyway, join us now as we try to underline the right favorites and highlight some possible underdogs in the hopes of finding that ever-elusive payout for UFC 160. The gambling lines, as always, come courtesy of BestFightOdds.

Undercard bouts:

Brian Bowles (-280) vs. George Roop (+240)

Having only lost twice, to Urijah Faber and injuryweight world champion Dominick Cruz, Bowles comes in as a healthy -280 favorite (and rightfully so) against the woefully inconsistent George Roop. Roop is coming off a less than convincing win over Reuben Duran in his return to bantamweight, whereas his opponent is looking to get back on the short list of top contenders in the division. Bowles should be able to close the distance on Roop and get this fight to the mat, where we may see a submission victory for the former WEC champion. Bowles makes the parlay at -140 and the prop bet that he is able to end things before the final bell.

(“Do I *look* like I want to try on some slim-fit jeans today, you son of a bitch?!?” / Photo via FightDay)

After being hassled by The Man for two weeks due to a decade-old arrest, UFC heavyweight slugger Mark Hunt has successfully obtained his visa to travel to the United States for UFC 160 on May 25th, and will be departing from New Zealand sometime today. The UFC confirmed the news yesterday, and Hunt relayed the message himself with a quick tweet thanking God.

And so, Roy Nelson no longer needs to be hastily photoshopped into the poster. But the problem remains that Hunt is making the long trek to the States with less than a week to acclimate to the time-difference, which could hinder his performance. Will jet lag be the difference in this fight? Shoot us your predictions, and check out the complete lineup of UFC 160 after the jump…

(This shit again? Oh, yes. This shit again. / Photo via Getty Images)

Twitter rallies, brutal victories and even celebrity endorsements could not get Mark Hunt what he deserved — a clear path to the UFC heavyweight title. When Hunt was booked for UFC 160 against former champion Junior Dos Santos, however, it looked like the New Zealander’s violent campaign had finally paid off.

Dana White said that Dos Santos would get a title shot should he beat Hunt, so if Hunt crushed those plans, then he would be the unquestioned #1 contender in the division, right? UFC gold appeared to be within stumpy-limb striking distance for the former K-1 Grand Prix Champion.

Alas, ‘The Man’ just didn’t want to see Hunt get his. Last week, a 2002 arrest from which no charges resulted magically came to the attention of U.S. officials, who as of yet have refused to issue the New Zealander a visa to travel to the states, threatening his chances of competing at the “Velasquez vs. Bigfoot 2″ event on May 25th. (If you have to ask who ‘The Man’ is in this situation, you are clearly a part of the conspiracy against Mark Hunt. Narc.)

The UFC is not giving up on Hunt fighting at UFC 160, though they do appear to be hedging their bets. “To put anything to rest, we are confident the issue will be resolved and we anticipate Mark competing in the co-main event for UFC 160,” the UFC’s Director of Communications, Dave Sholler, told media during a Tuesday teleconference. ”Our team is working through that issue and we anticipate Mark making his way to the United States this weekend.”

(Yep. That pretty much sums it up.) 

God. Damn. It.

Although details are sketchy at best right now, it appears that UFC heavyweight contender/future champion Mark Hunt has been arrested in his native New Zealand and has consequently been denied the Visa that would allow him to fly to Las Vegas, kick Junior Dos Santos’ ass on May 25th, and secure the next shot at Cain Velasquez. The information was passed along by none other than Hunt himself via his Twitter account. Caution: the following contains several naughty words and a noticeable absence of the letter “c.”

Well thanks to a idiot friend of mine I did get arrested. Denied again at airport I’m never helping anymore dikhead mates. This is wat happens wen u have friends that are dikheads the last fukn time I help these mother fkn trouble makers. 

New Zealand: It’s pretty much Stockton, CA with nicer summers.

(Y’know, drinking a gallon of buttermilk every morning doesn’t make much sense either, but that never stopped him from doing it. / Photo via Joshua Wood @ MMAValor)

Roy Nelson‘s knockout of Cheick Kongo last weekend marked his third first-round KO victory in a row, and earned Big Country the first three-fight win streak of his UFC career — which means that the UFC has to start treating him like a legitimate heavyweight contender again, rather than a gray-bearded novelty act. So who’s next on Big Country’s menu? Following UFC 159, Dana White suggested that either Mark Hunt or Daniel Cormier could be the next opponent for Nelson, which makes perfect sense if we’re putting together matchups solely based on body type.

Nelson’s camp, however, doesn’t agree with one of those names. According to a report from Ariel Helwani earlier this week, Nelson’s manager Mike Kogan said he’s not interested in a fight against Cormier. “He doesn’t think it makes any sense for Nelson,” Helwani explained on UFC Tonight. Instead, Kogan would prefer Nelson to fight Hunt, Antonio Silva (if he loses to Cain Velasquez at UFC 160), or Junior dos Santos…despite the fact that Dos Santos already slaughtered Nelson back in 2010.

It’s obvious why the Nelson camp would want to avoid a guy like Cormier — he’s incredibly dangerous, but he still doesn’t carry the same name value as the other UFC vets that Kogan mentioned. And let’s face it, Nelson’s odds of beating Hunt or Bigfoot are a lot better than his odds of beating DC. (Let’s just forget Kogan said anything about Dos Santos. That’s a damn suicide mission, and we all know it.) From a managerial perspective, it’s solid advice. Devil’s advocate, though: Cormier is rightly ranked as the #2 contender according to the UFC’s official rankings, and beating him would place Nelson closer to a heavyweight title shot than a win over Hunt or Antonio Silva would.

Personally I think Nelson vs. Cormier makes dollars and sense. See what I did there? DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE, YOU SON-OF-A-BITCH??? Anyway, let us know how you see it in the comments section.

Better late than never. Props: @ZeusJupiterMMAO

It may have taken a year to come about, but a fight between Mark Hunt and Junior dos Santos has been booked for UFC 160.

When a quadriceps injury to Alistair Overeem left Junior dos Santos without an opponent for UFC 160, Hunt immediately organized a Twitter assault in an effort to get the fight. Despite White’s initial insistence on postponing Overeem vs. dos Santos, a phone call from “The Super Samoan” last night was enough to change his mind. See, sometimes persistence doesn’t result in a restraining order.

Mark Hunt is currently riding a four fight win streak, coming off of a brutal, jaw-breaking knockout over Stefan Struve at last Saturday’s UFC on FUEL 8. Meanwhile, dos Santos is coming off of a gutsy, yet lopsided loss to Cain Velasquez at UFC 155.

(“It’s embarrassing, okay? Let’s just say I’ll be on penicillin for a while, and leave it at that.”)

As first reported by MMAFighting yesterday evening, UFC heavyweight Alistair Overeem will be unable to fight former champion Junior Dos Santos at UFC 160: Velasquez vs. Bigfoot 2 (May 25th, Las Vegas), due to an undisclosed injury suffered in training. No word yet on the nature or severity of the injury, although it will reportedly require 4-5 weeks of recovery. [Update: Overeem has revealed that it was a slight tear in his quad muscle.]

As soon as news of the withdrawal broke, fellow UFC heavyweight Mark Hunt tried to organize a twitter assault to claim the replacement spot against Dos Santos. However, UFC president Dana White suggested that Overeem vs. Dos Santos will simply be postponed to sometime in the summer. Ah well. Would have been nice to see this happen again.

The injury couldn’t come at a worse time for the hormonally fluctuating Overeem, who just followed up his nine-month licensing timeout with an upset knockout loss to Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva last month. If Overeem does meet Dos Santos this summer, the fight will come a full year-and-a-half since the Reem’s last victory over Brock Lesnar in December 2011 — not a good look for a guy who spent the previous four years unbeaten.

(UFC President Dana White revealed the organization’s previous plans for Barnett during a media scrum last weekend)

According to Dana White, nomadic heavyweight Josh Barnett not only turned down an opportunity to fight in the UFC again for the first time in a decade, he also turned down a chance to jump right into title contention. Barnett is 1-1 in his last two bouts — rebounding with a first-round submission victory over Nandor Guelmino last month following his decision loss to Daniel Cormier in the Strikeforce Heavyweight Grand Prix finals — but White said Saturday that if his promotion had been able to sign Barnett, they would have immediately pitted him against fellow former heavyweight champ Junior Dos Santos.

According to SB Nation, White said that the standard exclusivity component of the proposed UFC contract was the sticking point that Barnett had with the organization’s offer. Barnett has not announced any other plans for his MMA career and White went out of his way to say that he didn’t think the fighter was hesitant to face Dos Santos or any other particular fighter, so perhaps the two sides are still negotiating.

“I’m sure Josh Barnett wouldn’t care (who he fought),” White said after the UFC on Fuel 7 card in England this past Saturday. ”Josh Barnett is a fly by the seat of his pants kind of guy, he does his own thing, beats to his own fucking drum. Josh Barnett’s never been a guy to say I don’t want to fight this guy or I won’t fight that guy. He’s not that type of person.”

(But other than that, how was the fight, Antonio? / Photo via Getty Images)

As first reported by a “random Irish person” and officially confirmed last night on UFC Tonight, Cain Velasquez will defend his heavyweight title at UFC 160 (May 25th, Las Vegas) in a rematch against Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva, just one year after Velasquez tore Silva apart at UFC 146. Though Bigfoot is coming off back-to-back stoppages of Travis Browne and Alistair Overeem, the news still comes as a bit of a surprise; even Bigfoot’s management felt that he should win a couple more fights before testing his fate against Cain Velasquez again.

Unfortunately, there aren’t many better options in the heavyweight division right now. Velasquez won’t fight his teammate Daniel Cormier, and the rest of the UFC’s heavyweight contenders either have their next fight booked already, or lack the kind of hype that Bigfoot currently carries after his comeback win over The Reem. And what are you going to do, have your champion sit out until a totally legitimate contender emerges? Come on. That’s not how you run a business.

So will Velasquez smash Antonio Silva for the second time, or should we start preparing for “The Bigfoot Era”? (Step one: Stock up on canned goods. Step two: Limber up.) In other UFC 160 heavyweight booking news…

When Junior Dos Santos attempted to write off his lopsided defeat to Cain Velasquez at UFC 155 as the result of “personal” issues, most of us just assumed that he was having a difficult time facing the fact that he was bested by a man he had previously destroyed. “Excuses are like assholes,” commented at least one of you. “JDS was way to overconfident and paid for it,” said a few others.

However, if the rumors currently circulating the MMA blogosphere have any truth to them, it was actually Armfarmer who provided the most astute observation of JDS when he declared that “Maybe he finally realized that he’s married to a 2 when he could be pulling 10′s left and right. That realization would sure cause me some distracting personal problems..” A bit harsh? Surely, but according to Tatame’s Guilherme Cruz, Dos Santos was in fact in the process of separating from his wife of ten years in the lead-up to UFC 155:

If you were wondering what JDS meant when said he has personal issues prior to Cain’s rematch, he ended his 10-year marriage w/ Vilsana. 

(As you can tell by the above photo, Junior was feeling a little self-conscious about his looks that night as well.) 

Perhaps it’s because he’s one of the nicest guys in the sport, but we’d like to think that most MMA fans hold Junior Dos Santos to a higher standard than that of most fighters. We sure as hell do. Regardless of who you were rooting for at UFC 155, we defy you to declare that you didn’t weep for the battered former champ as he asked Joe Rogan “Why they do that?” while being met with a chorus of undeserved boos in his post-fight interview. It was like watching a child’s face sink with the unexpected revelation that that there was no Santa. On Christmas Eve.

So it is with heavy hearts that we must bring you the inevitable next chapter in the book of any fallen fighter: The Excuses. To be fair, the problems Junior cited in a recent interview with Brazil’s Esporte were not the typical kind of nonsense you’d hear from 90% of MMA fighters attempting to diagnose a loss, but the fact that we hold Junior in such high regard makes his recent allegations all the more disappointing:

Really was my head. I had some personal things going on, a bit of my attention was lacking because of it. And another thing. Soon after the fight I went to the hospital and had a scan, which showed my creatine was too high. The normal level is up to 300, mine was in 1400. I also had trouble in the urine and kidneys.

 The explanation of the doctors is that I pushed over the line, I over trained, and problems could have happened even before the fight… I was so good that I ended up crossing the line. That was the explanation of doctors. Mine is that I was not good with my head, was having personal problems and did not go well mentally in the fight. 

(“Don’t worry, Junior! I can see him growing weaker with every punch! Three more rounds of this and he’ll be all yours!” / Photo via Getty Images)

We hate to even say this because he’s such a nice guy and all, but the beating Junior Dos Santos took at UFC 155 may have been the most deflating, one-sided ass-kicking in the history of UFC heavyweight title fights (other than the time that senior citizen beat the tar out Fatty McGoo, of course) and is being labeled as such by many MMA pundits out there. As one of you pointed out in our salary recap, Junior’s face mirrored one of those faces of meth posters over the course of the five round affair, yet the sumbitch still posed for photos afterwards.

As you can probably tell by now, my New Year’s resolution was to use more hyperlinks. SUCK IT, TOUCH PHONE USERS!

Aaanyway, Junior couldn’t even make it to the hospital before he was bombarded by SporTV, who thought the best time to ask a professional fighter strategy-based questions was while he was determining how much blood he had lost just hours earlier. You know, kind of like how CNN often waits until a soldier in Iraq steps on a landmine to drill him on the ins and outs of The Pincer Movement. Junior’s broken English response was as you would expect:

It (he) was better and deserved to win, but I used the wrong strategy. I was very worried about his entry in my legs and left face unprotected. So he hit me. When I was on the floor, I should have used more jiu-jitsu, I trained so much. But I tried to (get) back up, and it hurt me too, but on the ground it (he) is very good, very strong. I did not connect any punches good, even. It was bad because I was feeling very well, did a great training camp, everything was just right. But the fight is (over) anyway.

(This guy knows what I’m talking about. / Props: Reddit)

The UFC paid out $1,521,000 in reported salaries and performance bonuses to the fighters at UFC 155, according to figures released today by the Nevada State Athletic Commission. Leading the payroll was former UFC heavyweight champ Junior Dos Santos, who made a hefty $400,000 for his five-round death-march against Cain Velasquez. Velasquez landed in second place with half that total. The only other fighter who was able to crack six figures was Jim Miller, and that’s only when you factor in the $65,000 Fight of the Night bonus he earned for his three-round thriller against Joe Lauzon.

The full UFC 155 salary list is below, via MMAJunkie. Keep in mind that the numbers don’t include additional revenue from sponsorships, undisclosed “locker room bonuses,” or percentages of the pay-per-view that some of the UFC’s stars are privy to, nor do they include deductions for taxes, insurance, or licensing fees.

Cain Velasquez: $200,000 (includes $100,000 win bonus)
def. Junior Dos Santos: $400,000

Jim Miller: $147,000 (includes $41,000 win bonus, $65,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
def. Joe Lauzon: $92,000 (includes $65,000 Fight of the Night bonus)

Constantinos Philippou: $36,000 (includes $18,000 win bonus)
def. Tim Boetsch: $37,000

As MMA gamely stumbles into 2013, we’ve once again decided to bestow meaningless awards to the fighters and moments that caught our attention this year. CagePotato’s crack team of writers spent all month nominating winners in 27 different categories, which we’ve loosely arranged in chronological order. Use the “next page” links to scroll through this monster, or click on the following page links at your leisure. And as always, thanks for putting up with us for another year. Here’s to bigger and better things in 2013, which shouldn’t be a tough goal to hit, considering.

Page 1: Knockout of the Year, Comeback Fight of the Year, Worst Performance in a Drug Test, ‘WTF?’ Moment of the Year

Page 2: The Krazy Horse Bennett Arrest of the Year Award, Worst Event of the Year, Worst Fight of the Year, Best Fight of the Year

Page 3: The Cecil Peoples Shittiest Decision of the Year Award, Most Bizarre MMA News Story of the Year, The Dana White Crazy Freakout of the Year Award, MMA Twitter Photo of the Year

Page 4: Greatest Fight Canceled Due to Injury, The Minowaman Freak Show Hall of Fame Award, Most Satisfying Beatdown, Comeback Fighter of the Year

Page 5: MMA Fail of the Year, Catchphrase of the Year, The Steve Nelmark Memorial “Is He Dead?” Award, Best Female Newcomer

Page 6: The “Really? You’re Just Gonna Keep Doing that Shit that Gets You in All That Trouble?” Award (a.k.a. “The Koppenhaver”), Gnarliest Injury of the Year, Best Event of the Year, Submission of the Year

Page 7: The Inaugural “Okay, It’s FINALLY Safe to Call This Guy Wasted Potential” Award (a.k.a. “The Filho”), Greatest Hype Deflation, Greatest MMA GIFs of the Year

(Props: CagedInsider on Facebook)

Junior Dos Santos‘s five-round thrashing at the hands of Cain Velasquez last night resulted in photographs both horrific and comically horrific. But as the above photo proves, Junior walked away from his beating with his faculties somewhat intact, and was healthy enough to fist-pose afterwards with middleweight Tim Boetsch, who gave Cigano a run for his money in the “most gruesomely misshapen fighter of the night” category. Throw a slashed-up Joe Lauzon in there, and you’d have the most depressing/inspiring MMA photo of the year. It hurts to look at these guys so soon after suffering through unimaginable physical agony, but it’s hard not to give it up for you-know-what.

Photo courtesy of Getty Images.

By Elias Cepeda

With a somewhat forgettable year thankfully coming to an end, UFC 155 looked to excite fans, promote contenders and get everybody ready for a new year. This card did exactly that. Not to reach into our bag of clichés so early into the aftermath, but UFC 155 really sent 2012 out with a bang, and set the bar high for upcoming cards in 2013.

With as many solid fights as took place Saturday in Las Vegas at UFC 155, Jim Miller and Joe Lauzon’s three round battle was recognized by the UFC brass as the Fight of The Night and each man earned an extra $65,000 for their effort. The lightweight contenders should also be in consideration for Fight of The Year lists everywhere.

If it is, Lauzon will be competing with himself for his incredible fight last August against Jamie Varner. JLau may have lost the decision against Miller on the judge’s score cards, two rounds to one, but deserves credit for coming back from being bullied, beaten and bloodied badly in the first round by Miller in the first round and finishing stronger in the final two rounds.

On the strength of his aggressiveness and multiple submission attempts to close out the second and third rounds, this writer believes that a very reasonable judge could have scored the bout Lauzon’s way instead of Miller’s. As it stands, both men were impressive in their own ways and, *reaches back into the bag of applicable clichés* there simply were no “losers” in this one.

Miller has always shown excellent boxing skills but he may have been sharper than ever before against Lauzon in the first and second rounds, scoring almost at will with shots to the body and head, as well as knocking Joe down repeatedly with a nasty inside leg kick. His dirty boxing from the clinch was masterful, using punches, knees and elbows to hurt and cut open Lauzon over and again.

(What a crazy year it’s been. Just think, four weeks ago that bald guy in the middle was actually homeless. / Photo courtesy of Esther Lin’s UFC 155 weigh-in set on MMAFighting.com)

UFC 155 might not be as epic as some of the UFC’s previous end-of-year cards (you can blame the injury curse for that), but any time the Heavyweight Championship of the World is at stake, it’s must-see TV.

Tonight, defending champ Junior Dos Santos will try to keep the train a-rollin’ in a rematch with his old pal Cain Velasquez. Meanwhile in the co-main event, lightweights Joe Lauzon and Jim Miller will gobble up as many performance bonuses as they can get their little hands on. Plus, six middleweight contenders — including Tim Boetsch, Alan Belcher, and Chris Leben — will swing their ham-hock fists at each other, in the hopes that the most popular kid in school might notice them. Lotsa luck, ladies.

Running our final liveblog of the year (!) will be none other than Elias Cepeda, who will be updating you with round-by-round results after the jump starting at 10 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. PT. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and please share your New Year’s resolutions in the comments section.

(Beats your face to a bloody pulp… personally stitches you up after.) 

Most of us tend to forget that UFC heavyweight champ Junior Dos Santos is a BJJ black belt under the Nogueira brothers, probably because we’d like to continue living in a world where we can convince ourselves that a 6’4″, 240 pound killing machine has some discernible weakness other than being a really nice guy when he’s not caving in your face like a Silver Shamrock Halloween mask. That’s right, I just referenced Halloween 3. I’m less a writer, more a prophet.

But unfortunately, the video that awaits you after the jump proves once and for all that JDS is, like me, an absolute master of his trade. In the video, we see a young Junior competing in his second professional MMA fight against Eduardo Maiorino, who sadly passed away from a heart attack just two days ago at the tender age of 33. After opening the fight with a signature flurry of punches, Dos Santos secures a takedown and is able to latch onto a guillotine choke from half guard that seems to be less technique and more Junior using his cyborg strength to vice grip his hapless opponent into submission.

Video below. 

(It was around roughly the fourth punch to Velasquez’s dome that Big John began to question the validity of Junior’s CPR certificate.)

Today at 4 p.m. EST, the UFC 155 press conference will kick off live from Las Vegas, Nevada. It will no doubt feature Junior dos Santos doing his typical “Baby Huey trapped in the body of Jason Voorhees” nice guy routine and Cain Velasquez repeatedly stating that “Yes, I will in fact bring a different gameplan into this fight, so for the love of God, stop asking me this question” while Dana White tries to comment on how great of a fight this is without dropping fourteen consecutive f-bombs in the process. All in all, it should be pretty entertaining as far as press conferences go, so join us after the jump to catch all the action (or lack thereof) starting at 4 p.m. EST.

(If you ever needed a sign that Photoshop is out of control in this country, look no further than the Koopa Troopas facing off in this photo.) 

By Dan “Get Off Me” George

This Saturday night, Zuffa will close out 2012 with a rematch between former UFC champion Cain Velasquez and current heavyweight champion Junior Dos Santos. It has since been revealed that both fighters were injured heading into their original matchup (cue the guy who says “all fighters fight with injuries”), so there are a lot of extraneous factors heading into the rematch that you should seriously consider before placing your bets.

With a 3-4 record over the past 7 UFC shows, the GAE has slipped into the red for the first time since UFC 148 (thanks in no small part to that God damned injury curse) and we need a boost to avoid dining on Newfoundland steak and mashed potatoes in 2013. UFC on Fox 5 was a particularly cruel mistress, and like a Diaz brother taking a realtor’s exam, the result was a miserable failure. So follow us after the jump as we keep it short and sweet in the hopes of turning a profit for UFC 155: Dos Santos vs. Velasquez 2.

Preliminary card:

Max Holloway (-380) vs. Leonard Garcia (+290)

Leonard Garcia will be looking to avoid his fourth consecutive loss against a young up-and-comer out of Hawaii in Max Holloway. Holloway will enjoy a 12yr advantage in the father time category and I believe Garcia gives him the stand up fight he wants on Saturday night. Holloway will be too fast and this may very well look like a Cerrone/Garcia barnyard sparring session, with Holloway playing the role of “The Cowboy.” Max makes the parlay list and wins in an exciting affair as “Bad Boy” tries to find the mark with those crazy hands of his while Holloway picks him apart from the outside.

24/7 or a UFC Prime Time it ain’t, but Fox has put together some decent Countdown documentary/promo shows together. The newest one, looking towards this weekend’s UFC 155, features a look at the careers and camps of former heavyweight champ Cain Velasquez and current title holder Junior Dos Santos.

In the video, Cain talks about the lessons he learned as a college athlete that he feels will help him avenge his loss to Dos Santos. Dos Santos discusses the challenge of keeping Cain off of him and preventing him from using his All-American wrestling skills to stymie the Brazilian’s dangerous punches.

Also on the Countdown to UFC 155, Joe Lauzon and Jim Miller exchange smack talk and promises as they discuss their lightweight contender fight. If you’re lucky enough to still be sitting on your ass, stuffed with food sit back and enjoy watching pro athletes train harder in a single day of training than you ever have.

(Caution: This conference call was apparently recorded in a tin can headed straight for Pluto. Adjust speakers accordingly.)

For a guy who is supposed to be defending his title against Cain Velasquez in just over a week at UFC 155, heavyweight champion Junior dos Santos still seems awfully focused on Alistair Overeem, the man he was set to face back at UFC 146 before…well, you know. During the UFC 155 media call (full audio above), dos Santos touched on the respect he had for Velasquez as a professional, but not without taking a dig at Overeem in the process:

I prefer to fight against clean athletes and real professionals. Cain Velasquez is one of these guys. He’s a real professional fighter and that’s a good challenge for me. I know he’s very tough and I know how hard I have to train to face him. And the OTHER GUYS, they just say things, but there’s nothing behind the words. Guys like me and Cain Velasquez, we are made at the gym. Guys like the OTHER GUY there, they are made in the laboratory.

Ahh…the Lord Voldemort approach of anonymity. Touche, Junior.