By Jim Genia

It is physically impossible to walk into a Kevin James flick with high dramatic expectations. I mean, come on, this is the man who brought us such cinematic classics as Zookeeper, Paul Blart: Mall Cop, and I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry. If you bought a ticket to anything starring the actor and thought you were getting a shoe-in for this year’s Academy Award for Best Picture, you deserve to have your mullet set on fire. That said, James — who’s long been a supporter of the UFC, and whose presence at Octagonside has been frequent and well-documented by Zuffa cameraman desperate for an eight-second cutaway shot of something even just moderately noteworthy — stars in Here Comes the Boom, a UFC-centric comedy that opens today. How is it? Well, it’s no Gone with the Wind, but it’ll do.

The premise is simple, and something we’ve seen a million times before: an apathetic dude starts to give a crap about something noble, and goes through hell to do some good for that thing he previously did not give a crap about. James is, of course, the apathetic dude, a high school biology teacher named “Scott Voss” from Boston, MA, who puts about zero effort into teaching and too much effort into trying to land a date with the school nurse (Salma Hayek, cleavage-alicious as usual). But when budget woes spell impending doom for the music teacher’s job (played by a schlubby Henry Winkler — remember the Fonz? Yeah, he’s dead now.), it’s time for Voss to step up and do something drastic to plug up the school’s fiscal hole. And hey, what better way to earn cash then to become a UFC fighter?

Let’s get one thing straight, Kevin James has not exactly had the kind of career that would inspire a lot of confidence in his abilities as an actor. Sure, The King of Queens had it moments (not to mention all that Leah Remini goodness), but there is almost nothing that James can do to repair the mental anguish and self-inflicted bodily harm that Paul Blart: Mall Cop and Zookeeper were responsible for across the globe. We knew he was a big MMA fan, and seems like a pretty cool guy when he’s not squeezing out such 90 minute abortions as Grown Ups, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, and…*checks IMDB*…GROWN UPS 2?!! 

(Oh, the horror…)

So you can understand our trepidation when we awoke this morning to find the first trailer for James’ upcoming MMA film, Here Comes the Boom, waiting for us to absorb and dissect. Because, if we’re being completely honest, there haven’t been many great (or even good) MMA films to be released since the “boom” of the sport. The fact that the latest one was staring an overweight sitcom star who is basically box office cancer didn’t exactly inspire much hope either.

And honestly, now that we’ve actually seen the trailer, we’re kind of relieved. Kind of.

Check it out for yourselves after the jump and let us know what you think. 

Add this upcoming documentary to the pile of must-see soon-to-be-released MMA movies along with “Once I was a Champion” and “Fightville.”

“Fight Spirit Pride” looks back on former UFC featherweight contender Mark Hominick’s crossover period from Canadian MMA standout to popular Octagon veteran five years ago. Though it should have been one of the most exciting and happy times of his life, it was one of the most stressful and painful for Hominick as his father was also dying from cancer.

Featuring a number of the sport’s most recognizable faces including Dana White, Eddie Bravo, Joe Rogan, Sam Stout, Georges St-Pierre, Bas Rutten and Kevin James, the emotional film also touches on the untimely death of “The Machine’s” longtime mentor, trainer and friend, Shawn Tompkins last year.

Here’s a description from the film’s producers:

“This is a Documentary film about a UFC fighter’s struggle between being there for his dying father, and his career. This documentary is a very raw uncensored microscopic look into the life of a fighter; it has two deaths and two births.”

Check out the trailer after the jump.

(“Camp Carwin” Episode 4: In which Shane shows off the new diet that has dropped him from 285 lbs. to 255 lbs. Props: officialbudlight)

- Karyn Bryant: It Takes Much More Than That to Horrify Me [Exclusive Interview] (LowKick)

- Inside MMA: Tito Ortiz Addresses Altercation With Matt Mitrione, Hendo Talks Fedor (MMA Convert)

- Five Lessons: UFC 130 (NBC Sports MMA)

- Check Out This 10-Second Faceplant KO From Cage Warriors 42 This Past Weekend (MiddleEasy)

- UFC 130 Medical Suspensions and Injuries for ‘Rampage vs Hamill’ (MMA Mania)

- Chael Sonnen Responds to Jason Miller and Michael Bisping as “TUF 14? Coaches (5thRound)

- Clay Guida: Anthony Pettis Bout Will Be a Fight of the Year Candidate (MMA Fighting)

- UFC Allows Kevin James to Use Their Brand in MMA Comedy Film (TheFightNerd)

- UFC 131 Conference Call Highlights (Five Ounces of Pain)

- The 20 Greatest UFC Fighters of the Pre Zuffa Era (BleacherReport.com/MMA)

("The guy has titties. I couldn’t do a comedy bit next to a guy with titties. For real." Props: Spike.com)

Comic actor Kevin James has long been a familiar face at UFC events, so we suppose it was only a matter of time before this happened. According to a report on deadline.com (via MMAMania) the star of such critically acclaimed films as Grown Ups and Paul Blart: Mall Cop has his next masterpiece in the works, and yep, it’s MMA-related:

James is attached to play a physics teacher whose school faces drastic cutbacks. In an attempt to save his best friend’s job and the music program his students love, he moonlights in the octagon as a mixed martial arts fighter, ultimately leading to brawling in the UFC. The film is on a fast track, and production presidents Matt Tolmach and Doug Belgrad hope to get it into production next year.

I know what you’re thinking — the idea of shlubby-ass Kevin James getting a UFC contract is way too far-fetched, even in the context of a screwball comedy. But remember, Roy Nelson was an untrained paralegal with no MMA experience before going on TUF 10, and you all saw how well that worked out. One more thing: The music-teacher best friend in the movie? I’m willing to bet that the role will be an embarrassing gay stereotype played by Rob Schneider. Seriously, you all have to pay me five bucks if I’m right.

(Props: Bloody Elbow)

If you feel like you didn’t get to hear enough about the awful-looking Kevin James film "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" during the Ultimate Fighter Finale, check out his appearance at the Spike TV Video Game Awards.  This sketch — which is every bit as cringe-inducing as the interview was and as the movie will undoubtedly be — clearly took about five minutes to write, including bathroom and coke breaks.  When they couldn’t figure out how to end it some genius came up with the idea to have Rampage come out and howl.  Problem solved.  I know Rampage and Kevin James are bros, but I feel like one is having a bad influence on the other here.

After the jump, Gary Goodridge’s terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day, and more.