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The Potato Index: TUF 10 Finale Aftermath

(Jon Jones doesn’t know what to tell you. Sometimes you eat the bear and, well, sometimes you get disqualified for hitting him with illegal elbows. Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle’s after-party set.)

A bizarre night in Las Vegas brought the latest heavyweight experiment of “The Ultimate Fighter” to an end, and not a moment too soon. Now we break down the results to see who’s up and who’s down according to the patent-pending technology of the Potato Index’s arbitrary numerical rankings.

Roy Nelson +87

We get it, his physique is unimpressive. But a KO win showed he can fight on the feet and on the mat. Funny that Burger King doesn’t seem more pleased with a free endorsement from an athlete who’s known for his unappealing body.

Brendan Schaub -21
As we’ve seen in the past, losing in the TUF Finale isn’t any more a condemnation than winning is a guarantee of future success. Once he gets some experience under his belt, he could turn out to be an exciting fighter to watch. Why not give him Kimbo next, just for fun?


TUF 10 Finale Fighter Salaries: Edgar Leads the Pack, Kimbo Receives Meager Portion of Bread

Brendan Schaub Roy Nelson MMA TUF 10 finale
(Brendan Schaub does his best impression of Darrill Schoonover’s stomach. Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Not to stereotype dudes from New Jersey, but Frankie Edgar is probably pumpin’ his fist like a champ right about now. The UFC lightweight contender came out of the TUF 10 Finale as the card’s highest-paid scrapper, thanks in part to his well-deserved Fight of the Night bonus. Meanwhile, reality struck Kimbo Slice, who’s now earning 1/20th of what he used to make in EliteXC. Of course, he could have gotten paid more behind the scenes, but we only have the official figures in front of us, and you know how we hate to speculate without hard evidence. [*cough*] The full salary list is below…

Roy Nelson: $41,000 (includes $8,000 win bonus, $25,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
Brendan Schaub: $8,000

Matt Hamill: $46,000 (includes $23,000 win bonus)
Jon Jones: $20,000

Kevin "Kimbo Slice" Ferguson: $25,000 (no win bonus)
Houston Alexander: $13,000

Frankie Edgar: $71,000 (includes $23,000 win bonus, $25,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
Matt Veach: $30,000 (includes $25,000 Fight of the Night bonus)


Video: Kimbo Slice Reacts to His First UFC Victory

(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

At the post-fight press conference following the TUF 10 Finale, Kimbo Slice was as pleased as you could reasonably expect considering he’d just narrowly scratched out a victory against a guy who all but refused to fight him. Though fans and pundits expected Slice and Houston Alexander to put on a one-round war — a backyard brawl brought to the Octagon — we instead got Minowaman vs. Zuluzinho part 2. "We were prepared for somewhat of his attacks, but I wasn’t prepared for the ring-riding that he did," Kimbo said. Still, he wasn’t going to let Alexander bait him into making a mistake:

"If I would have ran in there foolishly, I would have gotten knocked out. It wasn’t difficult to stay patient…A few times, I just called him out. I had to call him by his name, I had to say some things in the ring, like, ‘Let’s do this,’ in so many words. I reverted back to the streets a little bit, verbally. He didn’t engage. He stuck to his plan, so I said, ‘Well, I’m not going to be foolish and run up on him.’ I wanted to be a smart fighter as well…
It’s hard. It’s not an easy thing because I first was a street fighter, and being a street fighter there was no training in my style of fighting. I just went in there based on my instincts, watching the guy’s movement, and countering him. But at this level of the game, as a professional fighter in the UFC, you have to be like almost genius-type smart because you have all these dimensions you have to bottle in one, and you just gotta know when to counter, and when to not hit, when to not engage, and try to wait it out. There’s a lot [that] guys gotta go through."

TUF 10 Finale Draws Meager Crowd, Pays Out Similarly Meager Bonuses

(Roy Nelson gives Ariel Helwani the obligatory belly rub.)

Roy Nelson became the newest/fattest "Ultimate Fighter" winner with his knockout of Brendan Schaub at last night’s TUF 10 Finale.  Dana White must have been at least a little impressed this time, because he awarded "Big Country" the Knockout of the Night bonus, worth a cool $25,000.  Mark Bocek took home the Submission of the Night bonus for the rear naked choke on Joe Brammer that came at the end of an absolute grappling clinic.  Fight of the Night went to Frankie Edgar and Matt Veach for a spirited two round battle that ended with a submission victory for Edgar.


The Ultimate Fighter 10 Finale: Live Results + Commentary

Kimbo Slice TUF 10 finale weigh in UFCRoy Nelson TUF 10 finale weigh in UFC
Matt Hamill Jon Jones UFC TUF 10 finale weigh in photo
(Top: Kimbo and Roy demonstrate the difference between "built like a black man" and "built like a polar bear." Directly above: The Amanda Knox verdict affected some fighters more than others.)

Okay, so "Heavyweights" wasn’t the best season of The Ultimate Fighter we’ve seen. Let’s be honest: Project Runway had a more talented group of fighters this year, and there weren’t as many divas. But tonight’s finale card will still give us a very entertaining night of fights, with two worthy TUF finalists, Kimbo Slice’s (possibly) last stand, and the always exciting Jon Jones looking to launch to the next level against Matt Hamill. Round-by-round updates from the TUF 10 Finale are after the jump; refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest. We begin our evening’s entertainment with a grudge match between two ex-football players…


Kimbo Slice: A Man in Desperate Need of a Positive Attitude

Kimbo Slice
(Kimbo, if the diet plan includes cocaine, cigarettes, and vomiting, it’s possible that you may be getting weight cutting advice from the wrong people.)

As the only fighter from season ten of "The Ultimate Fighter" to get a spot on the finale without winning a single fight in the tournament, you might think Kimbo Slice would be stoked simply to be getting the opportunity to show what he can do.  Considering the fact that he’s a heavyweight who is being handed a custom-made catchweight bout with a non-grappler from the weight class below his, you might even expect him to be damn near chipper about the whole thing.  You’d be wrong. 

On a media conference call to discuss this weekend’s finale fights, Slice revealed that he’s been struggling to make the roughly twenty-pound weight cut.  Though he only has to get down to 215 pounds, Slice said that so far the pound-shedding experience has been "not good," adding that the struggle has left him "moody" and generally mentally distressed. 


Video: When the Chill Dawg Rule Fails

(Props: MMA Share)

With Houston Alexander and Kimbo Slice set to square off in a "Ultimate Fighter" finale fight that could have been the Super Bowl of backyard brawls a few years ago, it seems only fitting that we take a look at what happens when the social contract breaks down and one man fails to adhere to the Chill Dawg Rule, which has a clear precedent in the fighting world.  What you see here is a fight between Kristijan Golubovic and Marian Rusu in a Serbian event ironically titled "Ultra FC: Stop the Crime." 

While there is no official word on whether this event succeeded in halting all crime in Serbia, it could not have helped that this fight turned into a lawless shit-show less than thirty seconds in.  Rusu was eventually ruled the loser via leg injury, but his opponent was reluctant to let him off that easily, chasing him around the cage and shoving the ref down in order to continue fighting a man who clearly wanted out.  I guess we shouldn’t be surprised, since Golubovic appears to be a pretty famous criminal in his home country.  He also has an awesomely obnoxious website.

Let this be a lesson to all you kids out there.  There’s nothing cool about failing to chill when asked properly.


‘TUF 10′ Episode 11 Recap: Hey, Can We Just Cram the Last Four Fights Into One Episode and Be Done With This Goddamned Thing?

TUF 10 rashad's playroom

After his latest “Do you wanna be an [expletive] fighter” speech on the last episode, Dana White is surprised that nobody is stepping over Matt Mitrione to take his spot, which is strange because Scott Junk made it very clear that he’d just do that, wrecked eye notwithstanding. One guy who definitely isn’t down to fight is (wait for it) Kimbo Slice, who’s concerned about his arthritis-stricken knee and starts throwing out excuses. Bottom line is, he won’t be able to perform at full strength, and he can’t stomach another loss, so he’d just rather not fight, if that’s cool.

“I am in no position to fight a kickboxer like James McSweeney at this point,” he says, adding that it would “demise” him a little bit taking the fight knowing he wasn’t healthy. Dana White is a little taken back; he didn’t expect this from Kimbo, whose gameness was supposed to be his best quality. But that’s the situation. The season’s poster boy turns out to be a total bust. I demand a refund.

Luckily, Matt Mitrione feels healthy again. He tells Rashad that he’s been cleared to fight, and Rashad tells us "I bet he called the doctor and the doctor said ‘listen kid, I told you two days ago you could fight,’” which is hilarious because that’s pretty much exactly how it went down. Finally, Mitrione admits that his head injury story was exaggerated to mess with James McSweeney and keep himself entertained. Ohhhhh, now it all makes sense


Wild Speculation Time: Kimbo Slice’s “Next Step”

(You don’t dress for the job you have, you dress for the job you want: manager of an inner-city Boot Barn location. Everybody has a dream.)

The final episode of "The Ultimate Fighter" season ten, is just a few hours away, and the boys at Spike TV seem like they may be worried that there isn’t enough at stake to make you tune in for the full two-hour show.  To remedy that, they sent out a teaser email promising that Kimbo Slice‘s future will be "revealed" tonight, prompting us to wonder whether this is finally going to be the TUF episode where the guys encounter a gypsy woman on the road during the drive home from the gym and she tells everyone’s fortune by looking at globules of their spit on the pavement (bad news for Wes Sims, he drowns in the Bering Sea this March). 

To further pique our interest on the matter, Ferg himself had this to say:

"Now it’s time for the next step in my career. Everyone will see what that is tonight on Spike. …It’s gonna be good.  Watch the show tonight. You’ll see what’s next for me. All I can say is that somebody’s getting knocked out. …Everybody knows what my stronghold is.  People will be able to see me and judge for themselves."

The weird part is, we pretty much already know what Kimbo’s immediate future holds; he’s fighting Houston Alexander.  So what’s all this next step stuff?  Unless something else happens in tonight’s episode to guide Slice’s life down a dramatically different path.  Something totally insane… 


Kimbo Slice’s TUF Finale Opponent May Be MMA’s Worst Kept Secret

Kimbo Slice
(‘Look dog, I spent five hours baking this loaf of bread. Now you eatin’ it one way or another.’)

Spike TV and the UFC are still trying to play it close to the vest when it comes to who Kimbo Slice will be facing in his official Octagon debut at next weekend’s “Ultimate Fighter” finale. Too bad they’re the only ones concerned with keeping it under wraps. Slice already removed the element of surprise somewhat with a recent Twitter posting, but in an appearance on the “Todd N Tyler” radio show (via Bloody Elbow), Houston Alexander said several times that he’ll be taking on someone named Kevin Ferguson at the event. The hosts of the show naturally follow this statement up with a bunch of lame puns about Kimbo’s name, because they’re radio hosts and a certain number of lame puns per hour is required by their contracts.

In addition to telling us that he is the undisclosed first UFC opponent for Ferg, Alexander also insists that he’s “practicing boxing, takedown defense, it’s just crazy.” Man, that is crazy. It’s almost like he’s preparing for a fight with both stand-up and ground aspects. Though, Mr. Alexander, allow us to make a suggestion: kick him in the leg. Over and over again. The TUF editors have basically begged you to.