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21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

Tag: Kimbo Slice

CagePotato Halloween Costume Contest: The Finalists

Arianny Celeste Halloween
(Might as well face it, she’s addicted to blood. Photo courtesy of twitter.com/ariannyceleste)

Now that our post-Halloween hangovers have almost completely subsided, it’s time to present the finalists for our MMA costume contest. Take a look at the best submissions after the jump, and please select your favorite costume via the poll on the right. Remember: $175 in MMA Warehouse gift cards are on the line, so vote thoughtfully.

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It’s Like Kimbo Is Trying to Tell Us Something…

Kimbo Slice MMA UFC
(Props: twitter.com/realkimboslice)

When we asked Dana White if there was any truth to the rumors that Kimbo Slice‘s first post-TUF fight would be against Houston Alexander, he expertly dodged the question. (This is why he gets the paid the big bucks, and why we have to moonlight as night managers at Family Dollar in order to make rent.) But a couple of tweets Kimbo posted yesterday seem to support the theory that Slice will soon be thrown into the Octagon with another ground-game-challenged puncher. The "I Accept" line suggests that he won’t be fighting a fellow castmember at the TUF 10 finale. (Does he not get another chance to bang on the show after all? Does he lose again?) And yeah, the whole "HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM!" thing is pretty much a dead-giveaway. 

Alexander, who recently broke his three-fight losing streak with a first-round TKO over Sherman Pendergarst at Adrenaline 4, is reportedly applying for a fighter license with the Nevada State Athletic Commission, so all signs are pointing to "oh God, this is actually happening." Could it be the Kimbo Slice slobberknocker that we’ve all been waiting for?

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Exclusive: Dana White Talks UFC 104, Says Kimbo Slice Preferential Treatment Rumors Are “Crock of Shit”


Cagepotato.com Interviews Dana White – Watch more Funny Videos

The last time Cage Potato sent one of our wily female correspondents to interview a UFC star, it very nearly ended in a sexual assault.  But undaunted, we decided to try again when we heard Dana White would be at the recent “Ultimate Fighter” tryouts, and fortunately for our enthusiastic young interviewer DW is no “Rampage” Jackson.  In this exclusive video interview the UFC prez calls accusations that the UFC gave Kimbo Slice preferential treatment a “crock of shit,” saying that Kimbo had his manager present at his TUF fight, which he claims isn’t necessarily all that special, but no entourage and certainly no phone calls home.  White blames it all on Roy Nelson, but “Big Country isn’t the only one singing that song.  As for his remarks about TUF not being over till it’s over, well, I think we all know what that means: Poppa Slice is going to get to bang again, eventually.

All this, plus commentary on UFC 104, Junie Browning’s departure from the UFC, and what prompted Jackson’s supposed retirement from the UFC in this exclusive video interview.  Enjoy.

 

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Five MMA Fights That Happened Too Early

TITO ORTIZ vs. WANDERLEI SILVA


When it happened:
4/14/00, at UFC 25
When it should have happened: Spring 2003
Why: Ortiz vs. Silva was an entertaining scrap between two young contenders for the UFC’s vacant “middleweight” belt. If they met three years later, it would have been a superfight. By the end of 2002, Ortiz had defended his title five times — he’d lose it in September 2003 to Randy Couture — while Silva was PRIDE’s middleweight ruler, owning a 12-0-1 record in the promotion and two successful title defenses. With Ortiz at the end of his reign and Wandy near the middle of his, it would have been an ideal moment to establish bragging rights for one of MMA’s two leading organizations.
Prediction: Depends on where the fight was held. If Ortiz had home-field advantage, he’d probably still be able to grind out a decision win. In Japan, it would be Wanderlei via soccer-kick death.

DIEGO SANCHEZ vs. KENNY FLORIAN

When it happened: 4/9/05, at the Ultimate Fighter 1 Finale
When it should have happened: Sometime next year.
Why: Kenny Florian had enough talent and heart to make it to the finals of TUF 1 as a 185-pounder, but it was only a matter of time before he was squashed by another talented fighter who was more experienced and better suited to the weight; Diego Sanchez just happened to be that dude. This year, there was talk — hope, even — that Florian could upset BJ Penn at UFC 101, then have a high-stakes rematch against his old nemesis, who had followed him down to lightweight after an impressive run at 170. Unfortunately, Florian succumbed to Penn’s trademark mata leon, and Sanchez was booked to challenge Penn for the title in December. Still, as long as Florian keeps winning, he’ll claw his way back to the Nightmare — and this time, they’ll face each other as two of the best lightweights in the world.
Prediction: Sanchez outstrikes Florian to a decision in a far more competitive match than their first meeting.

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Friendly Reminders: MMA Halloween Costume Contest Needs Your Entries, UFC 104 Liveblog Tomorrow Night

Kimbo Slice tomato can
(Clever, Kimbo…)

The MMA Halloween Costume Contest that we announced last week is slowly picking up entries, but we want more, More, MOAR. You have until next Thursday to throw together a makeshift MMA-themed costume and e-mail a photo of yourself to feedback@cagepotato.com. The winner will receive an extra-special prize, though we haven’t quite decided what it’ll be yet. Good luck trying to come up with a costume idea that’s as amazing as this.

Also: If you weren’t one of the 3,300 people who got free UFC 104 tickets from Dana White, be sure to swing by CagePotato.com tomorrow night for our thrilling liveblog of the show. The Spike TV preliminary card broadcast begins at 9 p.m. ET / 6 p.m. PT, and the pay-per-view broadcast starts an hour later.

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Dana White Denies Kimbo Got Special Treatment on ‘TUF 10′, Hypes UFC 104 + More


(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

Following yesterday’s UFC 104 press conference, AllElbows.com‘s E. Casey Leydon got up in Dana White‘s face, and the conversation inevitably turned to Kimbo Slice. Despite multiple reports from TUF 10 castmembers that Kimbo had a large "posse" in attendance for his fight — yes, that’s the word they keep using — Dana claims that only Slice’s manager was there, while his wife and kids were definitely not. "I’ve never seen such crybabies in my whole life as the heavyweights [on TUF 10]," Dana says. Here’s another example: Roy Nelson told USA Today that Kimbo had his own media room and could make phone calls. Dana’s response:

"Roy Nelson is a moron. He’s an idiot. The guy really is that dumb. Never once did [Kimbo] use the phone to call anybody. And you’ll actually see later on as the show progresses, there’s a situation that happens where I have to get on the phone, and then I put him on the phone. He didn’t get any special privileges…Roy Nelson is a moron. Interview him sometime, you’ll find out. Roy Nelson is an idiot, he’s a complete jackass."

After the jump: A longer DW interview with Ariel Helwani, where Dana discusses Cain Velasquez‘s potential as a future champ, selling two Brazilian main-eventers, the necessity of teammates fighting each other, an update on the Dan Henderson situation, those Showtime knuckleheads, Bernard Hopkins’s criticism of MMA as gay porno, why "Big" John McCarthy isn’t reffing at UFC 104, and Chuck Liddell’s future in the sport.

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Jared Shaw Emerges From Hiding, Tells Kimbo He Should Have Gone Into Boxing


(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

"Can [Kimbo Slice] be a successful heavyweight? I don’t think so. I think 100% he’s in the wrong weight class, that’s to begin with…But I don’t necessarily think Kimbo can get to 205, at 35 years of age, with the wear and tear. It’s tough to learn this sport, this sport is a lot different than boxing because with boxing you only have to use your hands. In mixed martial arts, you use your hands, your feet, you grapple on the ground, you use submissions. That is a lot of knowledge to retain, and at some point your body starts to shuts down on you in life…Kimbo’s in the wrong sport, there’s no doubt about that. Kimbo should be in boxing…If you want to be the best of the best, if you want to make the most money possible for your family like you say, then you probably should have went to the square-circle."

So says former EliteXC VP Jared "$kala" Shaw, who has now been out of the MMA game for over a year, and recently checked in for an interview with Fanhouse. Despite the criticism of Kimbo’s career choices, Shaw harbors no ill will towards the TUF 10 star, and is proud of the time he spent promoting fighters like Slice, Gina Carano, and Brett Rogers — and if the UFC or Strikeforce wants to give him a job, he’s totally down. It’s a more reflective, slightly-less-cocky version of $kala than we’re used to seeing, even when he’s indirectly taking credit for Gina’s budding movie career. Later in the interview, Shaw tells us that his music is coming along, and he hopes to drop it on us next year. Also, Herschel Walker is a joke, and Bob Arum is an embarassment to the Jewish race. Pot, meet thrifty, lactose-intolerant kettle…

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Video: Dan Quinn def. Bond Lapua Via TKO (Stevia), 1:48 of Round 1


(Props: jay2005us)

Last night at a Gladiator Challenge event at the Shingle Springs Rancheria — near the Red Hawk Casino in Placerville, California — Dan Quinn harnessed the combined power of the White Cure and all his departed angels to knock Bond Lapua‘s teeth down his throat. Lapua, who may have been making his MMA debut, came out like a house on fire, snapping some nasty leg kicks and landing a crushing right hand that almost ended Dan’s night, then beating him up a bit in the clinch. I dare you to guess what happened next, player. After a few well-placed power punches, Lapua Cro-Copped out of the fight, a thoroughly broken man.

The TKO over Lapua was Quinn’s second straight victory. Remember when we used to laugh at this dude for even suggesting that he could take out Kimbo Slice? Quinn vs. Slice, October 2009, no leg kicks, no takedowns, just throwin’ hands: Who takes it?

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Brock Lesnar No Longer Bothering to Make Any Sense At All

Brock Lesnar gym
(‘Oh, that? It’s an allegory for how we train around here. Or, wait, when it involves an animal does that make it a fable? Hold on, let’s ask Tuchscherer.’)

Sometimes I get the feeling that Brock Lesnar is actually a really smart, articulate guy, but he has a vicious sense of humor that makes him want to say the most ridiculous things he can think of just to see if anyone has the balls to call him out on it.  Chances are, no, they don’t.  So he just keeps talking and things keep getting weirder.  The latest such example comes from a Yahoo! Sports article that attempts to get inside Lesnar’s head by eating lunch with him at Subway.  Naturally, there’s all the usual smack talk about Shane Carwin’s lack of difficult opponents and that adorable little Division II national wrestling championship that he won.  But there’s also this bizarre quote when Lesnar gives his take on TUF 10′s recent Kimbo Slice-Roy Nelson fight:

"It looked like a couple of high school kids, a barroom brawl.  The fat biker dude took his vest off and put ranch dressing on his (chest)."

In a perfect world, the interviewer would have countered that statement by asking, ‘What the hell are you talking about?’  But sadly, ours is an aggressively imperfect world, so that probably didn’t happen.  Instead, we’ll go ahead and ask.  WTF, Brock?  What is that even supposed to mean?  Ranch dressing on his chest?  What kind of bars are you hanging out in, anyway?

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‘Ultimate Fighter: The Aftermath’ Tackles Kimbo’s Loss, Rampage’s Retirement

Amir Sadollah Roy Nelson Dana White UFC MMA
(Click the image to watch the video on Spike.com.)

Kimbo Slice must have had other plans that day, but luckily Roy Nelson and Dana White were free to hang with Amir Sadollah for the latest edition of Spike.com‘s TUF 10 wrap-up show, The Aftermath. Dana does his best to debunk some rumors: No, he doesn’t have influence on when fights are stopped on the show — and how dare you suggest otherwise, Roy — and no, the alcohol isn’t provided for dramatic purposes. All booze is requested by the fighters themselves, not that drunken jackassery has been a problem on this season so far. (Still, Wes Sims can’t stay dry forever.) There’s also an interesting moment where Dana gets on Roy’s case for not joining a major camp. ("I think that it hurts you as a fighter…to not be sparring and training with guys that are going to push you every day.") And he’s still a little irritated about Roy’s post-fight Whopper order.

Later, the panel analyzes what Kimbo needs to do to be competitive in MMA, and Dana addresses the status of Quinton "Rampage," "B.A. Baracus" Jackson: "Rampage [announced] he’s retired because he’s mad at me. And I’m mad at him. It happens sometimes. I’m sure we’ll get this thing figured out, and I’m sure we’ll see him and Rashad fight. I highly doubt that Rampage is really retired."

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