(Yep. A whole lot of regrettable tats in this room. / Photo via MMAFighting.com)

Sit back, warm up your jaws, and get ready for CagePotato’s main card liveblog of UFC 160. The pay-per-view broadcast will be popping off at 10 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. PT, and your friend George Shunick will be sticking round-by-round results after the jump.

On tonight’s menu: Cain Velasquez will attempt to defend his heavyweight title against his old buddy Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva, while ex-champ Junior Dos Santos and Mark Hunt throw down for the next crack at the belt. Plus, light-heavyweights Glover Teixeira and James Te Huna put their three-fight win streaks on the line, lightweights Gray Maynard and TJ Grant meet in a potential #1 lightweight contender’s match, and Donald “Cowboy” Cerrone opens things off by roping an outmatched calf named KJ Noons.

Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and let your voices be heard in the comments section. Thanks for being here, guys.

(Cain doesn’t see an enormous head. He sees a big, beautiful, blood-piñata, just waiting to burst open and spill its bounty. / Photo via MMAFighting.com)

BG and Danga are back mahfuckas, baaaaaaaaaaaaam! [*cough*] Excuse me. What I meant to say was, UFC 160 goes down tomorrow night in Las Vegas, so CagePotato founding editor Ben Goldstein and staff writer Jared Jones have teamed up once again to discuss all the important themes surrounding the event. Which heavyweight fight on the main card is more likely to end in an upset? Should we write off KJ Noons as nothing more than UFC shark-bait? What’s a Nurmagomedov gotta do to get some respect around here? Read on, and throw down your own opinions in the comments section.

It seems pretty obvious that the UFC is trying to set up Dos Santos vs. Velasquez III, but who stands the better chance of throwing a wrench in their plans, Hunt or Silva?

Jared: ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS. The last I checked, Mark Hunt was riding high on the most unexpected win streak in UFC history, turned his last opponent’s jaw into mashed potatoes, and will now be harboring the kind of silent-but-deadly rage that can only be brought about by jet lag. “Bigfoot” is coming off an upset win over a sans testosterone-abusing Overeem, sure, but picking him over the man, the myth, the pseudo-Mexican who reenacted the rock scene from Cannibal Holocaust on him almost a year ago to the day? No thanks, my dude.

Ben: I hate to agree with this jackass — and how dare you try to persuade me by linking to a track from Primus’s underrated Rhinoplasty EP, Jared — so for the sake of argument, I’ll go ahead and say ARE *YOU* KIDDING *ME* WITH THIS?? Mark Hunt has built up a dubious win streak slinging haymakers against guys who allowed him to do so. Junior Dos Santos is far too disciplined to become another victim of the same old rock-’em-sock-’em Super Samoan routine. In a brawl, Hunt has a chance against anybody. But this won’t be a brawl — it’ll be boxing match, and JDS is about as good as they come in that department.

And sure, Hunt has scored a string of upsets against guys like Cheick Kongo and Stefan Struve. Meanwhile, Antonio Silva has scored far more unexpected and dramatic upsets against guys like Fedor Emelianenko and the aforementioned ‘Reem. Bigfoot has heart for days, and fists big enough to dummy up anybody in the heavyweight division on any given night, including the current champion. How many times are you gonna sleep on this guy? #BigfootEra

Gray Maynard vs. T.J. Grant: Who will earn the right to suffer a narrow split decision loss to Ben Henderson next?

(It is reported that Cerrone’s final words were “Hold my beer, and watch this.” / Photo via Sherdog)

Two more big matchups have been added to the already-beefy UFC 160 lineup, which is slated for May 25th at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas. In addition to the previously reported Cain Velasquez vs. Antonio Silva heavyweight championship headliner and Junior Dos Santos vs. Alistair Overeem, the card will feature…

- Donald Cerrone vs. KJ Noons (lightweight): The always entertaining “Cowboy” Cerrone, who followed up his ass-whuppin’ at the hands of Anthony Pettis last month by nearly falling to his death in a recent rock-climbing incident*, will welcome former Strikeforce boxing-specialist KJ Noons to the Octagon. Noons has hit a rough stretch lately, losing four of his last five fights, all by decision. His last match ended in a split-decision loss against Ryan Couture.

- Glover Teixeira vs. Ryan Bader (light-heavyweight): Coming off his decision win over Rampage Jackson at UFC on FOX 6 — his third-straight win in the UFC and 18th-straight overall — the much-hyped Teixeira will get another solid test in the form of Ryan Bader, who choked out Vladimir Matyushenko in just 50 seconds at the same event.

We expect Cerrone and Teixeira to be solid favorites in these fights. Anybody predicting an upset?

* Don’t blame me, I wanted to go bowling.

(Before GSP and Carlos Condit, KJ Noons was by far the biggest pain in Nick Diaz’s ass. Photo via Esther Lin/Strikeforce)

Remember when Jorge Gurgel made the ominous claim that the losers at Strikeforce: Marquardt vs. Saffiedine would be out of a job? It’s starting to look like that rule maybe just applied to Jorge Gurgel. (Sorry, bro.) According to reports that have been coming out since the show, a couple of prelim fighters who fell short in their matches will soon be picked up by the UFC.

First up is KJ Noons, who lost to Ryan Couture in a decision so questionable that Dana White wondered if the coin-flip method would be more effective. It was Noons’s fourth loss in his last five outings — dating back to his rematch loss to Nick Diaz in October 2010 — but the UFC is giving the tough lightweight striker a chance to prove himself in the Octagon. As Noons told MMAJunkie yesterday, ”They said, ‘Heal up, and as soon as you’re healed up, then start training, and we’ll get you on a card.”

For Noons, a potential move to the UFC would represent a massive improvement to his career, and not just because of the increased visibility:

Fun Fact: According to our Strikeforce underdog poll, a staggering majority of you Taters thought Ed Herman stood the best chance of pulling off an upset over Ronaldo Souza. In a distant second was that of the now retired Mike Kyle, and in an even more distant third was a tie between “Mike Goldberg over his drug addiction” and “Barnett’s ability to piss clean.” In short, the results were hurtful, hilarious, and wildly incorrect, which is exactly the kind of rapport we’ve been trying to establish around here for the past five years. So take in this kudos, Potato Nation, because like a rich, neglectful father in a children’s holiday movie, it will be a long time before we willingly give you another compliment.

But on the off chance you didn’t vote in our poll or even tune in for Strikeforce’s final event (Full disclosure: I am catching up on the fights as I write this. KJ Noons should be on his way to a clear cut UD victory, right?), we’ve placed a full video recap of the main card above. So sit back and let Pat Militech’s soothing baritone take you back to a night of squash matches topped off by Tarec Saffiedine’s destruction of Nate Marquardt’s leg, which apparently next to none of you saw coming.

-J. Jones

(Jeez, I haven’t seen such poor fight choreography since Sonny Corleone went to town on that punk Carlo for beating on his kid sister.) 

If our past few posts are any indication, it doesn’t really matter what the subject of this article is, because you Taters will inevitably turn the comment section into a discussion on a feller who goes by dipsetkilla, whether he fucked your mom or not, and how gay you would be based on whether he fucked your mom or not. Personally, I think we should have dipset and bootystar (remember him?) engage in a winner-takes-all battle of incoherent superiority. Then again, dipset is probably hitching up his trousers and throwing a five dollar bill on my mother’s nightstand as we speak, so clearly I have a dog in this fight. Maybe I just miss bootystar and such whimsical gems as: “I bet the gladiator got asked cuz he was caught starring at the pork barrel sausage in the littereen next to his bald headed one yed jack of pades” but I digress.

Aaannnyyway…a pair of bouts have been added to Strikeforce’s stacked (LOL!) final card that will feature Luke Rockhold vs. Mr. Glass, Daniel Cormier vs. some dude, Josh Barnett vs. Imhotep, and Whoshisface vs. Whatshisname. We don’t mean to over-hype these fights, but needless to say, they will forever change your definition of the word “Superfight.”

(Alternate titles for the event include “Strikeforce: All’s Well That Enswell” and ”Strikeforce: Operation Frequent Wind. / Photo via Showtime Sports.)

Strikeforce continues to blow its talent wad for what might be the last event of its existence. As MMAJunkie reported on Friday, a compelling lightweight battle between KJ Noons vs. Ryan Couture has been added to January 12th lineup, and will likely take place on the Showtime Extreme-televised preliminary card.

Since coming up short against Nick Diaz during their Strikeforce welterweight title fight in October 2010, Noons has gone 1-2 at lightweight, most recently dropping a unanimous decision to Josh Thomson at the Tate vs. Rousey card in March. Still, his sharp boxing and significant experience edge could make him a very tough match for Couture, who is riding a three-fight win streak. Couture won a split-decision over Joe Duarte in his last Strikeforce appearance at Rockhold vs. Kennedy, and was most recently spotted looking at a paint-clad Natasha Wicks with an expression that seemed to say, “You’re hot and everything, but my dad’s already manhandled you, so I don’t know.”

(Scott Coker: “Whooaa.” That other dude: “Niiiiiiice.” / Photo courtesy of facebook.com/StrikeforceMixedMartialArts)

Welcome, friends, to the most bonerrific highly-anticipated women’s bantamweight fight in MMA history. Seven months after winning the Strikeforce 135-pound strap, Miesha Tate will attempt to make her first title defense against arm-snapping fire-cracker Ronda Rousey. And that’s just the cherry on top of a loaded fight card that also features two former Strikeforce champions (Josh Thomson, Ronaldo “Jacare” Souza), a pack of crowd-pleasing sluggers (Paul Daley, Scott Smith, KJ Noons), and the return of former PRIDE welterweight grand prix champion Kazuo Misaki.

Handling our liveblog for this evening is Steve Silverman, who will be posting round-by-round results for the Strikeforce: Tate vs. Rousey main card after the jump starting at 10 p.m. ET. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and please toss your own brilliant opinions and observations into the comments section.

…and fillilng out nicely, we must say. (Pic: StandThemUp.org)

At the post-fight presser for “Strikeforce: Rockhold vs Jardine”, promotion CEO Scott Coker artfully dodged questions about the demise of Women’s Featherweight Champion Cris Cyborg, offering up some good news for the media to focus on instead. His announcement confirmed the pending showdown between Champion Miesha Tate and rising star Ronda Rousey. Additionally, Coker unveiled three more bouts for the card, which will go down in Columbus, Ohio on March 3^rd.

With their women’s Featherweight division in shambles, Strikeforce will look to further develop the scene at Bantamweight with a pairing of Sarah Kaufman and Alexis Davis. Kaufman formerly held Strikeforce’s 135lb strap–her only loss came in a title defense against Marloes Coenen back in October of 2010. Since that time she’s rattled off wins over Megumi Yabushita and Liz Carmouche. Davis is on a three-fight streak, picking up her last two wins over Julie Kedzie and Amanda Nunes under the Strikeforce banner. Given the caliber of competitors and their placement on this card, it’s safe to assume that the winner of this fight could go on to challenge the victor of the Tate-Rousey bout.

Yeah, she spent more time on the cage than in it. (Photo: Las Vegas Sun)

Since the late 90′s I’ve seen the same assertion rear its head on MMA email lists, usenet groups, and internet forums from time to time: The best fighter in the world isn’t in the cage or the ring. He’s toiling away in a South American coal mine or defending his land in Sub-Saharan Africa. His legend will never extend beyond the shores of his remote Pacific island and he’ll never be able to prove his abilities to the world. To a certain degree, this must be what life is like for Gilbert Melendez.

Finding out that your company is staying afloat and that your job is secure would normally be terrific news, but despite his admirable towing of the company line, you have to know that “El Niño” was gutted when he realized that Strikeforce wasn’t going anywhere and neither was he. The bright lights, big networks, and top paydays of the UFC will not be his. More importantly, neither is the opportunity to prove himself against the best in the world.

(Oh man. This is not going to end well. / Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.com. For more photos from this set, click here.)

Can you believe it’s been over three months since Strikeforce put on a legit non-Challengers card? The promotion finally gets back to business tonight with two title fights — Gilbert Melendez vs. Jorge Masvidal in the lightweight division and Cris Cyborg vs. Hiroko Yamanaka at women’s featherweight — plus a light-heavyweight bout between Gegard Mousasi and Ovince St. Preux that could produce a contender to the vacant belt.

Round-by-round results from the “Melendez vs. Masvidal” main card broadcast on Showtime will be collecting after the jump beginning at 10:30 p.m. ET, courtesy of CagePotato liveblog rookie Steve Silverman; please do your best to make him feel welcome. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest.

Yeah, we were praying for something to happen in that fight, too.

Heading into last night’s Strikeforce card, there were a lot of potential storylines. There was Werdum continuing to clean out Strikeforce’s heavyweight division. There was Overeem avenging his loss to Werdum five years ago in devastating fashion. There were the returns to relevance of Josh Barnett and Jeff Monson, the rise of Daniel Cormier and “Othereem” getting the fans to learn his name. Yet after the event was over, the most compelling thing we can take from it is that Dallas has some educated MMA fans. While your average Affliction clad meathead was booing from the start of Cormier vs. Monson until the end of the night, Dallas fans only booed during Overeem vs. Werdum.

Normally I hate when fans boo fighters, but to say Overeem vs. Werdum was boo-worthy doesn’t begin to capture what a disappointment the main event was. We expected fireworks, and instead were given an even less relevant version of Silva vs. Leites (at least that fight was for a title). If that fight was under the UFC banner, Dana White would have immediately issued an apology to the fans and a threat to fire Werdum over another performance like that. To say the least, Werdum’s chances of getting back into the UFC were more than likely squashed by that fight three round Thales Leites impression.

(Where’s your creepy joker-smile now, playboy?)

The latest installment in Strikeforce’s Heavyweight Grand Prix Tournament goes down tonight at the American Airlines Arena in Dallas, featuring the long-awaited rematch between Alistair Overeem and Fabricio Werdum, and Josh Barnett’s promotional debut against Brett Rogers. Plus, KJ Noons and Jorge Masvidal jockey for #1 contendership in the lightweight division, and 14-year veteran Jeff Monson collides with rising heavyweight star Daniel Cormier.

Handling the play-by-play for this evening will be the Shemp Howard of CagePotato’s liveblog-rotation, Matt Kaplan, so let him know you care in the comments section. Live results from the Showtime broadcast of “Overeem vs. Werdum” will be stacking up after the jump beginning at 10 p.m. ET; refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest.

(“Overeem is my son. Scott Coker is my uncle. Gina Carano is my hot cousin. Josh Barnett is my sister’s meathead boyfriend.”)

Betting odds for the complete lineup of tomorrow night’s Strikeforce card were released yesterday, and looking over these numbers, it seems like the perfect opportunity to dig yourself out of the hole you put yourself in by following our previous gambling advice. Now, we don’t actually recommend the use of off-shore gambling sites these days, in light of the government’s recent eRaids, but hey, entertainment purposes and all, right? Check out the juiciest lines for Strikeforce: Overeem vs. Werdum, courtesy of BestFightOdds.com, then listen very carefully to what we have to say…

Main Card (Showtime, 10 p.m.)
Alistair Overeem (-321) vs. Fabricio Werdum (+300)
Josh Barnett (-319) vs. Brett Rogers (+309)
K.J. Noons (-144) vs. Jorge Masvidal (+135)
Daniel Cormier (-300) vs. Jeff Monson (+325)
Valentijn Overeem (+111) vs. Chad Griggs (-122)

(Video courtesy of  YouTube/MrKidKhaos)

Charles Bennett emerged last week from wherever he’s been hiding since being choked out by Drew Fickett during the Shine Fights lightweight tournament just long enough to film himself sipping on a Mountain Dew and puffing on a Black & Mild while calling out a handful of fighters he has beefs with.

("Minced martial arts is great. I watch it all the time.")

It looks like former UFC lightweight and welterweight champ BJ Penn has brought in a new secret weapon to help him prepare for upcoming UFC 127 bout with perennial contender Jon Fitch in Australia.

Fight Hype is reporting that “The Prodigy” has spent some time in Las Vegas honing his pugilistic skills with acclaimed boxing trainer Floyd Mayweather Senior.

The father of IBO, IBA, IBF and WBC welterweight and WBC super welterweight champion Floyd Mayweather Junior, Senior has trained several top boxers including his son, Oscar De La Hoya, Leila Ali, Ricky Hatton, Joan Guzman and Chad Dawson.

“Joy” says that when “The Prodigy” first showed up at his gym, his nickname didn’t seem to be an accurate description of the Hilo, Hawaii native’s fighting prowess, but with a few days of his tutelage, Penn picked up a lot.

“BJ Penn is a cool dude, man. I’ll be honest, at first, it didn’t seem like he could fight that good. I mean, I don’t know about his ground game and all of that stuff, but he’s got some pop and in just the three days I’ve been working with him, he has improved, man,” he says. “In his words, man, he told me, ‘I ain’t never seen some of this stuff you’re showing me, man.’ And that’s only after three days. BJ is learning fast, man. He’s a good guy.”

("Say, ‘DANA!’")

Strikeforce announced today that welterweight champion and Gracie jiu-jitsu black belt Nick Diaz (23-7, 1 NC) has signed a new multi-year, multi-fight deal with the San Jose, California-based promotion.

Details of deal, including the duration and whether or not the contract is non-exclusive were not released, but with the signing Diaz put to bed rumors that he was angling for a return to the UFC to compete alongside his Team Cesar Gracie teammate Jake Shields when his Strikeforce contract ran out.

“I’m looking forward to continuing my career with Strikeforce,” said the 27-year-old Stockton native. “When I first got here, there weren’t a lot of great 170-pound fighters for me to fight, but that’s definitely changed. There’s a lot of really good fighters in the division now and I’m ready to fight anyone who thinks they can beat me.”

8-0 in his past eight fights, Diaz has only lost one fight in the past two years, which was a result of a stoppage due to a cut he sustained in his first bout with KJ Noons at Elite XC: Renegade in 2007. He was released by the UFC following back-to-back wins over Josh Neer and Gleison Tibau in his last two Octagon appearances.

(Anybody can do a punchface. That’s kid stuff. PicProps: Strikeforce)

That’s about as good as Strikeforce can do it, right there. America’s bridesmaid MMA promotion – typically cited for ineptness more than greatness – put on its best show in some time on Saturday night in San Jose. Nick Diaz and KJ Noons slogged through an exciting, if a bit repetitive, five-round main event that left Noons with a broken jaw and hand and Diaz bloodied, but still clinging to his welterweight title. The homies even looked like true homies after the final horn, hugging it out at the center of the cage. Meanwhile, Marloes Coenen appeared tall and capable in taking the women’s 135-pound belt off Sarah Kaufman, while Josh Thomson slipped by JZ Cavalcante, but once again proved that his main, main thing is making declarative statements and calling fools out.

Did the quality of the broadcast still leave a lot to be desired? Sure, Jim Ross, it always does. But at this point we’re focusing on the positives. Like the bitch mom from “American Beauty” we feel like grabbing Strikeforce by its rosy cheeks this morning and announcing: “You didn’t even screw up once!” Now on to the particulars.

(Ah, memories. PicProps: MMA Weekly)

The Diaz and Noons clans renew their Hatfield vs. McCoy-style family feud tonight in the Strikeforce cage. We all know what happened last time. A lot has changed in the three years since doctors stepped in to award Karl James Jr. a first-round victory over Nickolas Robert in EliteXC. In the wake of that fight, one guy opted to let surgeons fix his face. The other guy got called “luckier than a dog with two peckers.” The weirdo 160-pound strap they fought over in EliteXC doesn’t even exist anymore. Perhaps most importantly, homies everywhere have been reminded not to be scared. Kind of makes you shudder to think what might happen in the rematch, huh?

The live blog begins at 10 p.m. EST. Be sure to hit refresh early and often to stay abreast of the latest updates.

(VidProps: YouTube/Heyman Hustle)

Even though it probably committed its welterweight champion to the wrong grudge match, Strikeforce has managed to cobble together a decent little card for its Showtime broadcast tonight. Nick Diaz’s main event bout with KJ Noons could be the kind of brawlalicous slugfest that MMA fans always say we don’t see enough. Couple that with Sarah Kaufman finally getting the chance to fight on a “major” show and Josh Thomson battling Gesias “JZ” Cavalcante for the respect he believes they so richly deserve, and it should be a pretty good time. So why do I feel so concerned? Maybe because there are a few storylines running just below the surface that we as MMA fans should find a bit disquieting. Here’s a look at them … 
 

The icy glares of Nick Diaz and KJ Noons that have been haunting the top of our homepage all day should serve as a firm reminder — Strikeforce: Diaz vs. Noons II goes down tomorrow night on Showtime, starting at 10 p.m. Be sure to come back tomorrow for round-by-round results in our liveblog. In the meantime, check out the final thoughts from a few of the main card players in these clips from strikeforcefilms.

Above: Marloes Coenen and Sarah Kaufman discuss their 135-pound title scrap. 135 is an unfamiliar weight class for Coenen, but she’s had no problem with the cut, and as you can see during the face-off at the end, she’ll be carrying a serious height advantage.

After the jump: KJ Noons talks about his own trip to a new weight class, and his appreciation of Diaz’s style. Nick Diaz gives him props for taking the rematch, and suggests that he might not have been motivated in their first fight, due to Noons’s lack of name-value. ("I’d rather fight Fedor, y’know?") Then, some genius reporter asks Nick if he’s going to jump ship to the UFC, with Scott Coker sitting right next to him. Ouch. Also, Tyron Woodley breaks down his matchup with Andre Galvao and talks about his development in the sport.

(Now that’s gangster. Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.com) 

Strikeforce: Diaz vs. Noons II goes down Saturday night (Showtime, 10 p.m. ET/PT), and it’s not too late to put some cash on the fights. If you’ve already blown your kids’ college fund — hey, it happens — please swing by MMA Fightpicker and made your picks there. Otherwise, check out the Internet’s most favorable betting odds (below, courtesy of BestFightOdds.com) and let’s get to work…

MAIN CARD
Nick Diaz (-199) vs. KJ Noons (+200)
Sarah Kaufman (-290) vs. Marloes Coenen (+273)
Josh Thomson (-160) vs. Gesias "J.Z." Cavalcante (+159)
Tyron Woodley (-240) vs. Andre Galvao (+220)

PRELIMINARY CARD
Bret Bergmark (-124) vs. James Terry (+120)
Eric Lawson (-110) vs. Ron Keslar (EV)

(Props: graciefighterz)

This Saturday in San Jose, Strikeforce welterweight champion Nick Diaz will defend his belt against KJ Noons, the last fighter to defeat him. Diaz vs. Noons 1 took place at EliteXC: Renegade in November 2007; the fight was stopped due to cuts after the first round. Since their first meeting, Diaz has gone 7-0 (all wins by stoppage), with notable victories over Frank Shamrock, Scott Smith, Marius Zaromskis, and Hayato Sakurai. Noons has gone 4-0 since his win over Diaz, scoring knockouts against Yves Edwards and Jorge Gurgel.

It’s a rematch that needed to happen eventually, and most oddsmakers currently have Diaz at more than a 2-1 favorite, apparently based on Nick’s reputation and the fact that Noons is fighting in an unfamiliar weight class. The question is, will it look anything like their first meeting? In case you haven’t lately, check out the above video of their first fight. Let’s try to break it down…

(The Strikeforce Police will be a fixture at every event Nick Diaz is at)

Strikeforce CEO Scott Coker says that if a brawl erupts during the weigh-ins or main event bout of this Saturday’s event, the promotion will shoulder the blame this time around for not having the proper preventative measures in place.

Coker appeared yesterday on MMAFighting’s The MMA Hour and told host, Ariel Helwani that there will be plenty of precautions to ensure Nick Diaz and KJ Noons’ camps don’t throw down before or after their scheduled fight this weekend.

"I’ll tell you what – if we leave those two guys in a room alone, I think you know what’s going to happen," Coker said. "So it’s up to us – we’re going to have a wall of security there. We’ve brought extra police to handle the weigh-ins, the press conference and pretty much a wall of people will be there for the night of the fight. We have to take precautionary measures because these guys have this big feud – and it’s not just them, it’s their camps. We’re going to make sure that we host it properly, and part of that is adding extra security and police officers, and it’ll be fine."

(“What the fuck did you just say?” PicProps: Showtime)

Looks like the intrepid journalists at Strikeforce Films had to go to the gym and pull a shirtless Nick Diaz out of a training session in order to actually get him on the record about his upcoming rematch with KJ Noons. This after Diaz no-showed the company’s media conference call on Tuesday, leaving Noons to answer everybody’s questions all by his lonesome. Maybe that was for the best actually, since the last time Strikeforce tried to put Diaz onto a conference call he was so “sleepy” he didn’t really know what was going on. Or Maybe the Diaz Bros are finally starting to realize that talking to the media shouldn’t be their main thing, given how much stupid shit they constantly say whenever they get the chance. No wait, sorry, they’re still totally into doing that.

Anyway, the result of SF Films’ effort is after the jump, and it’s pretty much what you would expect: Diaz continues act like he thinks of himself as a normal, happy-go-lucky guy who just can’t believe that all these assholes keep fucking with him.

("I got your conference call for you right here, Coker.")

Apparently Nick Diaz doesn’t like conference calls.

If Strikeforce would have read his "Things I don’t like," rider he sent along to them with his signed contract, they would have realized that "conference calls" were on the list before "Mayhem Miller" and after "children" and they wouldn’t have scheduled him for a media call that he had no intention of participating in. 

So instead of pulling the plug on today’s call completely when they realized Nick wasn’t interested in talking to reporters about his October 9 title defense against KJ Noons, they got the next best guest they could get on short notice for the call: Cesar Gracie. No, seriously, that’s the best they could do.

According to Diaz’s outspoken coach, it "isn’t in Nick’s psyche" to do conference calls with his upcoming opponents, but he didn’t have a problem pretending to know what Nick would say in response to reporters’ questions.

Here’s the transcript of the call, which seemed suspiciously more like a scripted infomercial than a conference call at times. I’m not surprised Nick took one look at his lines and said, "Fuck that; I’m out."

(Props: youtube.com/shosports)

It’s not quite Nick Diaz vs. Jason Miller, but Strikeforce is going to do its very best to convince you that Nick Diaz vs. KJ Noons — who’s fighting for the title in his Strikeforce welterweight debut! — is the grudge match you’ve been begging for. And how do they plan on accomplishing that? By staying on message. As you’ll see, the famous phrase "Don’t be scared, homey" pops up twice in this one-minute hype clip for Strikeforce’s next event at San Jose’s HP Pavilion on October 9th. Which begs the question: If "DBS,H" is the theme of the night, why not hold the event in Stockton? What, too real for you guys? Violent crime rate too high? Pussies.

At this point, only two other fights have been booked for the Showtime broadcast of Strikeforce: Diaz vs. Noons II. After earning her employers’ respect with a slam-knockout of Roxanne Modafferi at the last Challengers card, 135-pound champion Sarah Kaufman will make her next title defense against Marloes Coenen, who was sacrificed to Cris Cyborg earlier this year at Strikeforce: Miami. Also, Matt Lindland will follow up his TKO win over Kevin Casey with a bout against hot middleweight prospect Luke Rockhold (7-1), who has ended all six of his Strikeforce appearances by first-round stoppage, including wins over Jesse Taylor and Cory Devela. Christ, good luck Matt.

 
(I think the message was quite clear. I specifically told Nick NOT to be scared.)

It looks like Strikeforce has missed the marketing train once again as the promotion has passed on a self-selling grudge match between Jason "Mayhem Miller" and Nick Diaz and will instead once again pair the latter up with KJ Noons in a rematch of their 2007 EliteXC title bout. In that fight, Noons emerged victorious due to doctor stoppage resulting from a cut sustained by Diaz. More memorable than their bout was the in-cage melee between Team Cesar Gracie and Noons’ father a year later after Noons’ fight with Yves Edwards in Hawaii during which Nick’s immortal "Don’t be scared, homie," line was born. EliteXC brass orchestrated a rematch-hyping staredown between KJ and Nick, but as we have learned, whenever a Diaz is involved, anything can, and usually will happen.

This time around Diaz’s welterweight strap will be up for grabs, which makes perfect sense according to Strikeforce calculus. Anywhere else Noons may have to…I don’t know…win a fight at 170 perhaps before getting a shot for the belt. But this is Strikeforce, where logic is overrated and matchmaking is easy if you have a magic eight ball.

(I gotta split, man. KITT is double parked out front.)

According to Strikeforce lightweight KJ Noons, he isn’t a dirty fighter and he says fans shouldn’t be swayed by popular opinion about a late punch he connected with after the bell in the first round and a questionable knee he landed to his downed opponent Jorge Gurgel in the second round during their Strikeforce: Houston bout on Saturday night.

"I’m not trying to be dirty," Noons said. "I’m just trying to finish the fight."

The fighter with the Hasselhoff hair explained the late shot to MMAJunkie, pointing to the fact that he wanted to ensure he won the round and that he didn’t even hear the bell.

"I didn’t hear the bell," Noons said. "I heard the 10 seconds. When you hear the 10 seconds, being a fighter, this is your chance. I don’t know if I won that round. I don’t know if he won that round. You want to end every round showing out good. A lot of guys do a takedown. For myself, I want to get that last couple combos in to maybe finish the round good and win the round."

(VidProps: YouTube/KarelMMArts)

Even 12 hours later, it’s difficult to fully grasp the ways in which Jorge Gurgel’s fight with KJ Noons turned into a terrible abortion at Saturday night’s Strikeforce: Houston show. Suffice it to say, a lot of things went horribly wrong and nearly everyone involved failed miserably to do their jobs.

As he almost always does, Gurgel came into the fight with the worst possible game plan, essentially guaranteeing defeat before the bout even started. Meanwhile, Noons crammed not one, but two blatantly illegal strikes into just over five minutes of fighting. For his part, referee Kerry Hatley seemed not to notice either of the infractions, then totally bungled one of the more obvious stoppage situations you’ll ever encounter in MMA. All the while the Strikeforce broadcast team reconfirmed for viewers its complete inability to adjust on the fly when even the slightest controversy rears its head.