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Six Reasons Nick Diaz Needs More Money

(Apparently, California’s hands-free law doesn’t apply to giving both fingers to a videocamera.)

By Jason Moles

For quite some time now Strikeforce Welterweight Champion Nick Diaz has complained at great length about how he wants more money. Apparently earning a cool $175,000 (not including sponsorships) for treating Paul Daley like a punching bag just isn’t enough.  Who could blame him though, what with gas prices topping over $4 a gallon? All kidding aside though (yeah, right!) here are the top six reasons Diaz needs to get some Mayweather money:

Hire A Personal Interviewer

As we’ve said in the past, Nick Diaz is the best/worst interview in the entire world.  However, after taking Dana’s advice about learning to play the game, Nick is going to have to hire his own private interviewer/translator. With a new found favor in the media’s heart, he’s sure to finally make bank. Warning to anyone who takes this job: Don’t start $%*#, won’t be $%*#!

Pay Exorbitant Amount of Money for his Sponsors

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The 5 Best & 5 Worst Moments in the MMA Career of Randy Couture

(“Let’s see here: High kick, low kick, body kick, side check kick … yep, I think I’ve got them all scouted.” Pic: LasVegasSun)

Some three days later, I’m still not sure if it makes it better or worse that Randy Couture’s MMA career ended via insane, never-before-seen crane kick knockout. On one hand, it was certainly sad to see the legend’s body slump lifelessly to the canvas after the UFC’s resident Karate Kid blasted him in the face just a minute into the second round of their bout in Toronto. On the other hand, maybe the kick really just saved us nine more minutes of watching Couture take potshots to the face at the hands of notorious counterpuncher Lyoto Machida. It had taken just a few moments after all to realize this bout wasn’t going to go Couture’s way. All 47 of his hard-earned years were apparent as we watched “The Natural” hopelessly chase Machida around the Octagon like a dog trying to hunt down its own tail for the full extent of the first round. Granted, he didn’t look Chuck Liddell-bad or anything, but the performance was enough to confirm that it’s high time for Couture to walk away – and this time to stay gone.

It got us thinking. When you’re in the game for 14 years, compile a 19-11 career record, essentially shepherd a sport from its dark ages into the white hot light of mainstream acceptance – when you are arguably the most important athlete ever to compete in your chosen field – there are going to be a few ups and downs. In light of that and by way of career retrospective for a guy who absolutely deserves one, after the jump we give you our picks for the five greatest and five worst moments in the MMA career of Randy Couture, presented here in chronological order …

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10 NFL Players Who Might Actually Have a Chance in an MMA Fight

By CagePotato contributor, Jason Moles

(Garth DeFelice could have been a contender if it weren’t for that bum hip.)

Imagine for a moment that it’s a hot July morning. You wake up in your McMansion located in a gated community or on a private road. You step into a bathroom, which appears to have been transplanted from a magazine, and take a shower. After you’re dressed, it’s time to have a modest breakfast consisting of no less than four eggs, three slices of bacon, three sausage links, a stack of hotcakes so scrumptious Paul Bunyan would be jealous, and all the freshly squeezed orange juice a man could want. Once you’ve had your fill, you hop in your Lamborghini and head to work… at BestBuy, or maybe it’s Staples. Oops, almost forgot; you went to college so you may have landed a comfortable desk job.

Yes sir, instead of heading to two-a-days at the stadium preparing for the upcoming season on the gridiron, you’re playing the role of the stiff with a 9-5’er to make ends meet. Hey man, it is after all “straight cash, homey” and every hour worked in that inglorious soul-crusher known as work is another chance to elude the repo man.

Do you know who you are? You are an American football player who used to play in the NFL. Since the lockout, things just haven’t been the same. We know it’s all about the Benjamins and all (unless your name is Herschel Walker), so here are a few, possibly former NFL players who might actually have a chance in MMA, unlike Jonnie Morton.

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The Top 10 Pre and Post-Fight Brawls in MMA History


(“Don’t be scared, homie.”)

By Matthew Kaplowitz

Honor. Respect. Discipline. These are the keys to being a good sport. Whether your arm is raised in victory or your head is hung low in defeat, a good fighter maintains his decorum in every situation. Unless you’re a jerk.

Every major sport has an athlete with a temporary lapse in judgment that causes them to do something they will regret later, and MMA is no different. In this sport, two people are locked in a cage and expected to beat one another until the other can take no more, so it only makes sense that some of these would spill out into a second fight if not for a hefty security team. That brings us to the top ten post-fight brawls, where the action keeps going after the bell and turns into one giant debacle that ruins the rest of the night! Don’t take your mouthpiece out or unwrap your gloves just yet, we are just getting started!

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Fatalities: The 10 Greatest Finishing Moves in MMA


(Fedor Emelianenko: Huge fan of Johnny Cage.)

Before there was the UFC, there was Mortal Kombat. First released in arcades back in October ’92, the addictively gory video-game franchise sought to answer the eternal question: Who would win in a fight between a kung-fu expert and a paddy-hatted immortal who can shoot lightning out of his hands?

The most memorable of aspect of the MK series has always been the trademark “Fatalities” — which have gotten progressively more over-the-top in the last 19 years. Of course, the sport of mixed martial arts often gives us similar moments of decisive ultra-violence. So in honor of the ninth installment of the game, which hits stores tomorrow, we decided to count down our favorite finishing moves in MMA. They may not be as dramatic as a spine being ripped out of your opponent’s body, but in the real world, this is as nasty as it gets…

#10: The Elbow Storm

A barrage of elbows to the head of a helpless fighter will make even hardened fans of the sport wince in sympathy — even if we’ve been watching this scene play out dozens of times since 1994. But there’s no questioning the raw efficiency of a “hellbow” assault from the top, which has the power to turn cocky contenders into broken shells.

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The 8 Weirdest Things MMA Fighters Believe

(No really, it’s good for you. Pic: DLAnderson.com)

It should come as no surprise that MMA fighters on the whole seem particularly susceptible to hokum and gimmickry. After all, in this sport everybody is looking for an edge. In an industry where your ability to keep up with the Joneses (pun totally intended) can be the difference between fighting in the Octagon in front of thousands of screaming fans and having a job where one of your main responsibilities is walking the girls to their cars at the end of the night, guys will do almost anything to stay on top.

Everybody wants to be the first to discover the next big thing, that next little trick that’s going to push them to the win. In other words, MMA fighters will try anything once. Naturally, that leads to guys dabbling in some crazy shit. Does some of it really help them? Sure, probably. Is some of it just utter crap? Definitely. With that in mind, here are our choices for the eight strangest things some MMA fighters believe …

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CagePotato Presents: 10 MMA Fights You Wish You Never Saw

tag team mma
(The problem with American MMA fans is that they don’t understand the tag-team ground game enough to appreciate it.)

BY MATTHEW “THE FIGHT NERD” KAPLOWITZ

We all have that one friend who still just doesn’t get MMA. You tell him how safe it is, he says he doesn’t believe it since you can punch a dude on the ground. You tell him there are rules in place to keep everyone healthy, he says he doesn’t believe it since you can punch a dude on the ground. See a trend developing? No matter what you say, this person just never understands. Part of it might be because of the numerous videos that highlight brutality or generally idiocy in the sport, and of course those are the videos that get traffic — not the ones that showcase good sportsmanship and quality fighting. I blame “America’s Funniest Home Videos” for this obsession with schadenfreude.

These are fights that your friend who hates MMA references to remind you of how horrible he thinks the sport is, and he could have a point with some of these when taken out of context. These fights make you ashamed to be an MMA fan; some for how strangely they turned out due to circumstances, and others for how damaging they were for the whole of the sport. Just a warning to you: This list might start off jovial, but it will take a sharp turn for the serious as we get closer to the bottom. So let’s dive into this cesspool that is teeming with the lowest common denominator and take a look at 10 MMA fights you wish you never saw, and more importantly, that you may wish never existed in the first place.

10. Kimbo Slice vs. Houston Alexander

The man billed as “The Youtube Sensation,” backyard-brawler-turned-MMA-fighter Kimbo Slice made a splash in EliteXC, until he was jabbed to death by Seth Petruzelli in the appropriate finale for that company. No one knew what would happen to Kimbo, and questioned if he would enter boxing, K-1, or return to MMA. We were soon given an answer when the Florida-native popped up on the tenth season of “The Ultimate Fighter.” Now, we would really see if he was UFC material by working his way up against other fighters vying for the top spot.

And hey, turns out Kimbo was not UFC material as he was defeated in the first round of the tournament by Roy Nelson. Still, people swooned over Kimbo saying he was given the hardest fighter in the house. Inevitably, Kimbo was granted a second chance at the TUF 10 finale, getting a fight with equally disappointing Houston Alexander, who had built up a reputation for having great hands and little else. It made perfect sense to book these two together, in hopes that one would knock the other into a time when ProElite meant something other than floundering stock prices.

Instead of fireworks, the match fizzled out and dragged out to a dull decision, with Alexander doing little more than throwing some leg kicks and Kimbo being the one to push the fight. Alexander, who was brought in for this one fight after three losses in a row, was cut and Kimbo was cut one fight later after a beatdown courtesy of Matt Mitrione. The moral of the story here — sure, street fighting is fun to watch, but does that equate to being an MMA fighter? It could if they actually trained. Slice was an example of the hype machine gone overboard, and there is a reason why we have not seen a street fighter pushed like that since.

9. Tag Team MMA

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The 6 Greatest Immediate Rematches in MMA History

Sometimes an MMA fight is so close — or controversial — that matching the fighters up again a few months later is the only logical option. In honor of the upcoming immediate rematches between Leonard Garcia and Nam Phan (at UFC Fight Night 24 on March 26th), and Edgar vs. Maynard 3 at UFC 130, we decided to round up our favorite “do-over” fights of all time…

6. STEPHAN BONNAR vs. KRZYSZTOF SOSZYNSKI
UFC 116, 7/3/10
Stephan Bonnar Krzysztof Soszynski UFC 116
Why it was necessary: A clash of heads during their first fight at UFC 110 opened up a nasty gash on Bonnar’s forehead; the referee didn’t see the illegal impact, and awarded a TKO victory to Soszynski due to cuts. Furious at taking his third-straight loss in such an unjust manner, Bonnar filed a formal appeal with the Combat Sports Authority of New South Wales. Unfortunately, it fell on deaf ears, but the UFC hooked Bonnar up (as they often do) by giving him an immediate rematch with K-Sos on the blockbuster “Lesnar vs. Carwin” card.
What happened: Bonnar/Soszynski 2 turned out to be a meat-and-potatoes brawl reminiscent of Bonnar’s first war with Forrest Griffin. The American Psycho and the Polish Experiment both appeared to gas out by the middle of the second round, but Bonnar was able to keep throwing and landing until he overwhelmed K-Sos with strikes at the 3:08 mark. The fight netted both men $75,000 Fight of the Night bonuses, and produced one of the greatest victory poses in UFC history.

5. FRANKIE EDGAR vs. BJ PENN
UFC 118, 8/28/10
Frankie Edgar BJ Penn UFC 118 MMA photos

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Top Ten American Freak Show Fights That Were Actually Good


(UFC 3′s Emmanuel Yarborough and Miley Cyrus: They may seem like a strange pairing at first, but then you spend some time with them together and you’re like “okay, I totally get it now.”)

By Matthew “The Fight Nerd” Kaplowitz

Japan has brought us so many great imports, be it giant robots, cartoons about ninja children dressed in bright colors (which sort of defeats the purpose of being a stealthy ninja), tentacle rape, and Pocky. Truly, their greatest offering to America has been the freak show fight. As we discussed last time, Japan was the country that legitimized the art of pitting two mismatched opponents in a ring and convincing us that this was the greatest thing since Steven Seagal invented the front kick.

If there’s one thing we Americans don’t like, it’s being shown up by a foreign land. So it was just a matter of time before an American promoter stood up and said, “You know what? I want to see a man that weighs a quarter of a ton fight a dwarf!” And that was how our first freak show fight was born. Well, not really, since we have better athletic commissions in America, but after reading this list of the “Top Ten American Freak Show Fights That Were Actually Good,” you might think otherwise. Let’s get it on!

10. Tim Sylvia vs. Wes Sims
Superbrawl 38, 12/12/04



In a rare battle between two giants, 6’ 8” Tim Sylvia stood almost eye to eye with Wes Sims, who had a two-inch height advantage over “The Maine-iac”.  Sylvia had fought another tall man, Gan McGee, the previous year at UFC 44, but this fight is far more entertaining. You would probably expect an evenly contested bout between these two, due to the height and their similarly aggressive tactics (both guys even used the same song for their entrance, go figure). For some reason that will never be known, Sims decided that he was the smaller man in this fight and would fight accordingly.

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Three Reasons Why You Should Always Cheat in an MMA Fight


(“Cheat to win!” / Photo via Getty)

There are a lot of things we’ll never know about the illegal knee Michael Bisping landed on Jorge Rivera midway through the first round of their UFC 127 co-main event. We’ll never know if the knee was truly “intentional” or how badly it actually hurt Rivera or whether or not it directly contributed to Bisping’s second-round TKO victory. What we do know for certain is that (whether he meant to or not) Bisping very obviously broke the rules and – aside from losing an ultimately irrelevant point on the judges’ scorecards – suffered absolutely no consequences for it en route to an important win over a man who’d quickly become his arch rival.

It should be noted that blasting Rivera with the knee wasn’t Bisping’s only infraction during the fight. He also grabbed the cage to avoid getting swept from top position with about 3:40 on the clock in the first. For that instance of clear rule-breakage his only punishment was a couple of stern words from referee Mark Goddard. So in a nutshell, in just under seven total minutes of fighting, Bisping indisputably broke the rules twice, yet the end result was that he got his hand raised, got to spit in the general direction of his opponent’s corner men and almost certainly got rewarded with a hefty win bonus from the UFC. Not too bad, all things considered.

As an isolated incident, the only thing Bisping’s performance against Rivera conclusively proves is that he’s kind of an a-hole. Unfortunately, when viewed as part of the big picture of how fights are officiated under the unified rules, we’re really only left to draw one conclusion: In MMA, it makes more sense to cheat than follow the rules. So long as you can keep yourself from getting bogged down by intangibles like “honor” and “fairness,” here are three reasons why.

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