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Tag: Lyoto Machida

‘Straw Dogs’ Caption Contest: And the Winner Is…

(“My God! The utter lack of humor in this contest was powerful enough to tear my skin!”)

Oh crap, I forgot all about this. So who was able to turn agonizing heartbreak into comedy? First, your finalists:

bitteralex: I wonder if it FEELS like a goat’s vagina?

Machiavelli: Lesson learned; Machida will definitely remember to take a carrot with him the next time he goes to pet the buses.

mikeraphon: I need a rematch like I need another hole in my head.

Rear Naked Poke: Round 5 just released the new Lyoto Machida Coin Bank, available this December.

Big Daddy Duker: A true practitioner of Machida Karate will never make noise while sneezing…no matter what the cost.

HabitualLineStepper: I’d better cover this up before I end up in the backseat of a car with Hendo and Brad Penny.

And now, the winner, because every contest needs one:


‘Straw Dogs’ Caption Contest: The Head-Gash Hall of Fame Gets a New Member


From Big Nog’s arm to Tito’s ribs, UFC 140 gave us more than its share of brutal moments. In case you forget what a nasty business this sport can be sometimes, take a look at the above post-fight photo of Lyoto Machida, who got split open, choked asleep, then unceremoniously dropped onto the canvas by Jon Jones. Enjoy your new scar, buddy. This guy knows what I’m talking about.

Your mission: Come up with a clever caption to the photo above, and submit it to the comments section below. We’ll pick a winner on Thursday who will receive a copy of Straw Dogs, which comes out on DVD and Blu-ray next week, and makes a perfect holiday gift, as long as you’re giving it to somebody who appreciates over-the-top violence. On second thought, you may just want to keep it for yourself…


Greg Jackson Translates ‘Check On Lyoto, Get Some Fans’ For the Rest of Us

(The faces of pure evil?? / Photo via

If you were looking for a reason — any reason at all — to hate on Jon Jones following his submission victory over Lyoto Machida at UFC 140, that post-fight video which showed trainer Greg Jackson yelling for Jon to “go check on Lyoto, get some fans” probably did the trick. It was a candid moment that called into question Jones and Jackson’s reputations for sportsmanship and Bushido-like respect. Was it all just an act to appear likable? Did they have any genuine concern for Machida’s health whatsoever?

Obviously, Greg Jackson is embarrassed by how he came off, and tried to explain his words in an interview with MMAJunkie:

I shouldn’t have spoken in that way, but that wasn’t my intention. It sounded bad, but moronic [expletive] comes out of my mouth sometimes. What I was saying was, ‘Go check on Lyoto,’ what I meant was to remember that you’re a public figure. There’s always attention on you and what you’re doing all the time, and there’s cage etiquette. There’s things you’re supposed to do, and going and checking on somebody is what you’re supposed to do. And now because I’m in military mode and in shorthand mode, I say, ‘Jon, go check on Lyoto and go get some fans,’ and what I should have said was, ‘You’re a public figure. There’s a way to conduct yourself.’ But instead, I shorthanded it.”


Technique Video of the Day: Gracie Breakdown – TUF 14 Finale and UFC 140

What a couple of weeks it has been for the avid Jiu Jitsu fanatic. Diego Brandao scored a brilliant last second submission over Dennis Bermudez to walk away with a UFC contract and a down payment on his momma’s new house, Frank Mir added the most prized arm of all to his collection (a feeling that Mir would later refuse to go into detail about, but we imagine felt something like this), and Jon Jones used his Stretch Armstrong genetics to choke out a Jiu Jitsu black belt in Lyoto Machida with relative ease. And with each beautiful, gruesome, or eye opening technique that graces the octagon, Ryron and Rener are here to make sense of it all.

Today, the Gracie brothers touch on Tony Ferguson’s slick omaplata attempt from his unanimous decision victory over Yves Edwards at the TUF 14 Finale as well as Brandao’s glass plaque-earning effort before breaking down possibly the most shocking submission finish in MMA history, Frank Mir’s come from behind kimura over Antonio Rodrigo Nogueria that absolutely destroyed the Brazilian’s arm, a picture of which can be seen after the jump:


[Video] Greg Jackson Coaches Jon Jones on Post-Fight Etiquette

(Props to @JacobPHansen for the tip)

There’s being a great athlete, then there’s being a great sport. Last night we learned that Jones is one of those things.

The champ takes plenty of heat for the way he carries himself. Whether you think he’s overly cocky or rightfully confident, you may not have appreciated the way that he dropped Machida to the ground like a sack of rocks. “Bones” has yet to taste defeat in mixed martial arts, which may be why he doesn’t seem to empathize with his fallen foes very well.

While the PPV microphones were cued in to Goldy and Rogan, the online stream gave access to a number of audio and video feeds. As it turns out, in addition to coaching Jones on takedowns and chokes, Greg Jackson is there to remind Jones on proper in-cage etiquette.

Does it make him any less of an incredible fighter? No. Does it make you dislike him a little more? Probably.


UFC 140 Aftermath Part I: Jon Jones Puts Doubts, and Machida, to Rest

Not elusive enough. (Photo: Esther Lin, MMA Fighting)

There’s nothing new in Jon Jones facing his ‘toughest test to date’; his recent fights have put him through a gauntlet of UFC champions. Searching for a style that stifles him is old hat as well; in his very short career he’s faced top level wrestlers, strikers, and even a one-of-a-kind karate specialist. And doubting the light-heavyweight champ? That officially became passé last night too.

While all of the smart money was being plunked down on Jon Jones, most acknowledged that Machida’s unique style would pose an interesting challenge to the young champion. Finding Machida with the end of your fist is a tough enough chore when you’re not spinning and twisting through the air, and Jones found that out in the first round. His flashy kicks and punches came close to finishing the Dragon’s shadow, but the intended target was long out of range by the time the twirling had ended. A pair of solid body kicks and a few stalking combinations gave Lyoto the round and momentum headed into the second frame against a suddenly more-human Jones.

“Bones” found himself on the losing end of the exchanges early in round two as well. Machida, who has made a career of the unorthodox, seemed able to predict what Jones would throw before he’d even thought of it. And that’s when it finally happened: Jones got hit. It wasn’t a jaw-dropping widow-maker, mind you, but finally we had contact, significant contact. Though Jones staggered backward at bit, he quickly regained his composure and did what champions do—he took over. A takedown followed by a brutal elbow to the forehead drew blood. Lots of it. Momentum had shifted, and Jones was certain the fight was his.


UFC 140: The Cold War in Hogtown

(“What you lookin’ at piss breath?”)

Well, here we are at the UFC’s second Toronto card of 2011 and I’m stuck at home an hour-and-a-half away live-blogging on my couch with my wife and my dog.

I got a call from a buddy a few hours ago telling me he had a free ticket for me, but I told him I had to keep you guys abreast of the action, so I took a raincheck. Don’t say I never do anything for you.

The prelims are already in the books. Check out the results after the jump and let’s get this thing going.


The Digital Sensei: Steven Seagal Will Disclose Secrets to Victory to Lyoto Machida Via Skype

“I got three of Richie’s guys breathing through their foreheads ova he-ya, so allow me be brief…”

Behind the scenes information and rampant speculation in the lead-up to a fight is the MMA equivalent of chicks gossiping in a powder room. It’s, like, totally fun, but when you start to base your investment portfolio around it or develop an eating disorder you know you’ve crossed the line. At least, that’s usually the case. The scoop we’re about to share with you is as solid as they come, so take advantage of this opportunity to change your fight picks and spray a bottle of Cool Whip directly into your throat.

Earlier this week, Light-Heavyweight challenger Lyoto Machida revealed that he had not been in communication with Black House’s not-so-secret weapon, Steven Seagal, during his training camp. Considering that his devastating knock out victory over Randy Couture was directly attributable (cough) to the action film star, it seemed odd that he wouldn’t turn to him for guidance while training for the fight of his life.

Have no fear, Dragon fans. As it turns out, Jon Jones‘ weaknesses are so glaring that they can be pointed out and easily exploited after a brief, last-minute teleconference. Who knew? Oh yeah, Seagal did.


“ReX vs. Danga” – UFC 140 Edition

(The CagePotato HR Department: Boldly squashing inter-office disputes since 2007.) 

Just like pictures of hot womens and irresponsible opinions, pre-UFC event bickering has become a fixture here at CagePotato. In advance of this weekend’s card in Toronto, we locked Danga and ReX in a miniature Octagon with energy drinks, a blow-up doll, and a set of questions. We were dubious about the doll, but ReX insisted that hilarity would ensue, and he assures us that it did. It wasn’t mentioned in the final article, but some things you just don’t want to ask about.

Come on in past the jump and witness the confusion of two men discussing MMA while being distracted by said hot womens, touching on the subjects of likability, MMA Math, and the potential importance of fashion choices.


Video: Countdown to UFC 140

(Meanwhile, back at the GQ press conference.)

In case you missed the full episode this week, we’ve got the entire UFC 140 countdown show for you right here.

Not sure if the production crew for the show has changed since the UFC has cut ties with SPIKE, but this episode has a much different feel than past editions, including new graphic and title sequences and a lot of slow motion shots .

Overall it’s a decent show.

One interesting factoid that came out of the episode is that Only Chuck Liddell in the past five years has successfully defended the UFC light heavyweight belt more than once. Jones has done it once and so has Machida.

Personally, I don’t feel that Lyoto deserves to be a 4 to 1 underdog, but I guess we’ll know come Saturday night.

Check out the entire show after the jump.