(Props: MMA Mania)

According to a new press release sent out by SpikeTV, the UFC’s 17th "Fight Night" card will go down February 7th at the USF Sun Dome in Tampa, Florida. Headlining the action will be a lightweight scrap between Joe Lauzon and Hermes Franca. Both men are coming off wins, with Lauzon most recently defeating Kyle Bradley via TKO at UFC Fight Night 15 in September, and Franca taking a unanimous decision over Marcus Aurelio at UFC 90 in October. Also on the card…

Mac Danzig vs. Josh Neer (LW): The Ultimate Fighter 6 winner looks to get back on track after being smothered by a demon-possessed Clay Guida at Fight Night 15. Neer could also use a win, as he lost a tough decision to Nate Diaz at the same event.

Amir Sadollah vs. Nick Catone (MW): This fight was originally supposed to go down at UFC 91, but Sadollah picked up some kind of leg infection and had to pull out. The match has been pushed to February, and the TUF 7 winner will finally get to test out newcomer Catone, a 5-0 Ring of Combat vet with four first-round stoppages under his belt. Sadollah is still just 1-0 as a pro.

Cain Velasquez vs. Denis Stojnic (HW): We didn’t even hear this one rumored until it was announced. Now that Mustapha Al-Turk has been re-assigned to UFC 92, they needed to find another patsy for Velasquez to eat up. Stojnic is just some random dude from Sarajevo who’s 5-1 in Europe. He is, however, a member of the Golden Glory team, which means he works out alongside Alistair Overeem, Sergei Kharitonov, and Semmy Schilt. How bad could he be?

MMA Weekly also hears that a lightweight bout between Kurt Pellegrino and Rob Emerson is possible; the entire fight card will be announced shortly.

(Photo courtesy of UFC.com.)

Coming off a disappointing decision loss to Clay Guida at UFC Fight Night 15 in September, TUF 6 winner Mac Danzig will reportedly face Josh Neer at UFC Fight Night 17, which will likely go down February 7th in Las Vegas. Josh Neer is himself coming off a loss at Fight Night 15 (to Nate Diaz), which tipped his UFC record to 3-4. MMA Weekly also reports that TUF 7 winner Amir Sadollah will face Nick Catone on the UFC Fight Night 17 card; Sadollah was supposed to face Catone at UFC 91, but had to pull out of the match due to a leg infection.

Both of these matches are expected to be featured on the televised portion of the broadcast, which will air for free on Spike TV. The event will come just one week after UFC 94 (St. Pierre vs. Penn), and two weeks before UFC 95 (Anderson Silva vs. TBA).

(Why you so mad, Nate? By Stockton standards, you rich!)

Official salaries for last week’s Ultimate Fight Night 15 were released today by the Nebraska State Athletic Commission, and not surprisingly it was Nate Diaz who made off with the most cheddar (that’s what the kids call money these days, right?). Here’s the full breakdown. Each winning fighter’s salary represents a doubling of his base pay:

Nate Diaz: $40,000
Josh Neer: $9,000
Clay Guida: $26,000
Mac Danzig: $15,000
Alan Belcher: $26,000
Ed Herman: $16,000
Eric Schafer: $12,000
Houston Alexander: $13,000
Alessio Sakara: $34,000
Joe Vedepo: $3,000
Wilson Gouveia: $36,000
Ryan Jensen: $4,000
Joe Lauzon: $20,000
Kyle Bradley: $4,000
Jason Brilz: $6,000
Brad Morris: $4,000
Mike Massenzio: $6,000
Drew McFedries: $16,000
Dan Miller: $10,000
Rob Kimmons: $5,000

Some quick thoughts…

Alex Trujillo — Clay Guida’s coach and owner of the Midwest Training Center — does the best Mike Goldberg impersonation I’ve ever heard. He has it all just right. The hyperbolic enthusiasm, the local news weatherman voice inflection, the whole package.

“Coming up next!” Trujillo shouts in his Goldberg voice, and it’s enough to get the whole dressing room cracking up. You can see how it helps to have guy like Trujillo around when you’re trying to stay relaxed before a fight. Soon the talk turns to what it would be like if Goldberg did commentary for porn movies. The consensus opinion? It would be awesome.

This is just part of what I was treated to last night as I shadowed Guida before and after his fight for this Si.com article. It was, to say the least, a unique experience. There are the guys who say that they just love to fight, and then there are the guys for whom it is obviously true. Clay Guida is the latter. Throughout his preparation there was never a hint of anxiety. Little leaguers have more nerves stepping up to bat.

As Guida sat in his dressing room having his hands taped referee Yves Lavigne came by to go over some basics. Just to clarify, Lavigne took out a sheet of paper that he had folded into thirds and held it up against the back of his own head to show Guida where not to strike. Through it all Guida could barely keep from smiling.

(For those about to get knocked the eff out, we salute you. Photo courtesy of MMAWeekly.)

FUCKIN’ HUSKERS!!! Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get down to business. “Ultimate Fight Night: Diaz vs. Neer” is going down in Omaha as we speak. But since it’s airing on tape-delay in most of the country, there might be some spoilers after the jump; feel free to come back when it’s 8 p.m. in your time zone. And please leave plenty o’comments now that leaving comments on this site isn’t such a pain in the ass. Click the “More” link when you’re mentally prepared, and refresh the page every few minutes to get all the latest from the Omaha Civic Center.

(P.S.: Stockton, son. Stockton California.)

(Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle.)

The BF half of the Cage Potato duo is in Omaha for tonight’s Ultimate Fight Night event. If you’re headed to the Civic Auditorium later this afternoon for the event, keep an eye out for the handsome devil with the laptop. I’ll be sitting behind that guy, scribbling my thoughts on a wax tablet. What? I just think all this new technology is a fad. It’ll blow over.

But if you can’t get to the fights tonight but want to find a way to make yourself sweat over the results anyway, allow me to suggest gambling. BestFightOdds.com has compiled all the lines for tonight’s event, and here’s what it’s looking like at the moment:

Nathan Diaz (-200) vs. Josh Neer (+200)
Clay Guida (-121) vs. Mac Danzig (+125)
Houston Alexander (-212) vs. Eric Schafer (+215)
Ed Herman (-220) vs. Alan Belcher (+215)
Joe Lauzon (-675) vs. Kyle Bradley (+500)
Drew McFedries (-200) vs. Mike Massenzio (+210)
Wilson Gouveia (-350) vs. Ryan Jensen (+326)
Alessio Sakara (-115) vs. Joe Vedepo (+128)
Jason Brilz (-209) vs. Brad Morris (+215)
Dan Miller (-110) vs. Rob Kimmons (+105)

Some thoughts…

(Photo courtesy of MMA Weekly.)

Ah, beautiful Omaha, Nebraska. Where any mention of the Cornhuskers is enough to work a crowd into a frenzy. I just returned from the Ultimate Fight Night 15 weigh-in, which was fairly uneventful except for the odd fact that every single fighter weighed in precisely on the mark. Every middleweight hit 185 on the button. Every lightweight, 155 exactly. You get the picture. It was eerie. Makes you wonder if the athletic commission here isn’t just phoning it in. One guy who seemed a bit nervous about the whole thing was Clay Guida, who stepped on the scale as if he were trying to sneak up on it. Maybe his brother’s troubles have him worried.

But the most interesting thing to happen at the weigh-in had nothing to do with the fighters on Wednesday night’s card. Before things got underway, Matt Hughes answered questions from the fans who arrived early. He talked at length about how good Robbie Lawler is, how he wouldn’t advise Lawler to fight Anderson Silva, but would like to see him face Georges St. Pierre, whose stand-up game is not as good as Lawler’s, according to Hughes.

“I know I want to see that fight,” he said. “I wouldn’t even want to corner Robbie. I’d just want to sit on the side and watch.”

But then, when the Q&A session was over, Hughes asked for a couple extra minutes on the mic. He said that he often gets asked about his most memorable story in the fight game, and then proceeded to share, unprompted, a tale from his “pre-Christian” days.

It seems Hughes was down in New Orleans and on Bourbon Street with Pat Miletich and some of the boys after a fight. He and Miletich got into a drinking contest, chugging beers out on the street with both fists. They had just finished slamming a couple and were walking down the street when Miletich stopped and bent over to puke in the street. Then he walked a couple steps, puked some more, then kept going, stopped, and puked some more. At some point, Miletich looked over at Hughes and pointed to the gaping space where his false teeth should be. Pat Miletich, MMA great, had just realized that he puked out his false teeth.

So what did he do? He walked back and sifted through each pile of vomit until he found them. And when he found them? He poured beer on them, put them back in his mouth, and kept going.

If you still care about the official weigh-in results after that, they’re after the jump:

(‘I came to chew bubblegum and represent the 209. I am all out of bubblegum.’)

No one can see the future, but as long as we’re going to speculate as to how things will turn out in Omaha on Wednesday (and let’s face it, we are), we might as well go all the way with predictions so specific they can’t possible come true….or can they?

Nate Diaz vs. Josh Neer

Despite his impressive performances since coming off “The Ultimate Fighter,” the UFC doesn’t seem interested in moving Diaz up in competition. Instead they move him laterally, pitting him against the journeyman Neer, who Nate’s big bro already beat. It’ll be no easy task for Diaz to top his double-birdie performance against Kurt Pellegrino, but he’s a showman. Diaz will get bullied around the Octagon by Neer early on, but at some point he’ll remember he’s the better submissions fighter. The thought will dawn on him all at once and he’ll jump on Neer’s back, lock in a standing rear-naked choke, and extend his middle fingers on either side of Neer’s head as he submits.

When will it happen: 3:17, round two.

What to watch for: the look on Joe Rogan’s face when he has to interview Diaz after the bout and ask him to talk us through the Bud Light replay. What isn’t bleeped out will be completely unintelligible.

Mac Danzig vs. Clay Guida

This is the kind of fight worth getting excited about. The stoic, cerebral Danzig takes on Enkidu, the wild man of the woods (officially known as Clay Guida). It’s the classic highly-technical vegan vs. tough-but-crazy caveman battle. Danzig will start overly cautious and be initially overwhelmed as Guida wades into him with reckless abandon. But as the fight wears on Danzig will start to figure things out, striking and circling and wearing Guida out with knees to the body. Then Guida will freak out, charging right into a triangle choke, and his face will be blocked by his hair as it changes colors before he finally consents to tap.

When will it happen: 2:03, round three.

What to watch for: Guida’s brother, who failed to make weight for his first “Ultimate Fighter” bout and was reportedly kicked off the show for it, will appear on camera at some point looking sad and not eating.

“UFC Fight Night: Diaz vs. Neer” goes down this Wednesday at the Omaha Civic Auditorium in Omaha, Nebraska. You can watch the action on Spike TV beginning at 8 p.m. ET/PT — conveniently, right before the premiere of The Ultimate Fighter: Team Nogueira vs. Team Mir. To begin the psyche-up process, here are the fighters from the card’s three key fights, discussing their matchups. Diaz/Neer is above, Danzig/Guida and Alexander/Schafer are below; props to BloodyElbow. The full lineup for the event is after the jump.

- The fight poster for Dream.6 is pretty bad-ass. (SubFighter Forum)

- Talking Rampage, ShoXC, GSP and more on MMA Rated Radio. (MMA Rated)

- Forrest Griffin and Mac Danzig land acting gigs. (Five Ounces of Pain)

- Kenny Florian’s younger brother set to make amateur debut. (Fightline)

- UFC 83 DVD outsells Boston Celtics and Ric Flair, kind of. (MMA Payout)

- A little old school Matt Hughes-Dennis Hallman action. Real old school. (MMA Scraps)

- It’s Beer O’Clock, are you properly outfitted? (Holy Taco)

- Four steps to becoming a rich jerk. (Wall Street Fighter)

- “Iron Man” deleted scenes feature hot girls, not so much Iron Man. (Screen Junkies)

(Does Phil Baroni even have control over what comes out of his mouth?)

Following UFC 86 Sherdog ran a story featuring comments from notable MMA fighters regarding their thoughts on the Forrest Griffin-Quinton Jackson decision. It was a pretty standard reaction piece, with the most interesting comment coming from Mac Danzig, who seemed to disparage Rampage’s overall persona.

But then Fightlinker pointed out that Phil Baroni, who had been quoted calling the decision “some bullshit”, was claiming that he never actually gave a quote to Sherdog:

First off I never gave my opinion on the fight being scored wrong to anyone esp a reporter from Sherdog. I never spoke to any media about my opinion the fight. I think its bullshit that Sherdog quoted me. First off I think the fight was a great one. Second I feel the decision was a fair one. I think Forrest is an inspiration and fought his heart out. His career is an inspiration and story book. He did a great job fought like a true champion against Rampage and his entire career. He deserves to be UFC champion and I take my hat off to him.

Now, if that were any other fighter, this claim would be pretty shocking. It’s not like Sherdog to just make up quotes. But since it’s Baroni, there is always the possibility that he a) is just screwing with them, or b) has no idea whether he did or didn’t give that quote.

Steve Cofield has information that seems to indicate it’s the latter.

“I might be a little biased because Forrest is a good friend and training partner, but in my opinion Forrest won the fight hands down, three rounds to two. He outworked him from beginning to end, and even though not everything he threw landed, at least he fought the whole time instead of just looking for one big shot. You know, Forrest trained hard for this fight and it showed. He was training in the gym everyday, not running around with a chain around his neck, telling people he’s a thug.” — Mac Danzig, to Sherdog

“Look…to me, Quinton beat Forrest, but they gave it to Forrest. I think the UFC wants a champion that Chuck Liddell can beat, so he can win the belt again. He is an ex-champion, sells more and has more marketing.” — Lyoto Machida, to Tatame

The 10 Most Important Fighters to the Business of MMA, part 1. (MMA Payout)

Mac Danzig discusses his knee injury, Clay Guida, advice to Amir Sadollah, and who he’d like to fight next. (MMA Weekly)

How a fighter might, theoretically, beat Lyoto Machida. (Fightlinker)

UFC/WEC/TKO vet Mark Hominick blogs his training for his upcoming Affliction fight against Savant Young. (MMA Training)

Fuck Delaware. (Five Ounces of Pain)

UFC marketing targets insomniacs and the unemployed. (BloodyElbow)

Affliction is using a quote from Dana White to publicize their event. That’s chutzpah! (MMA Madness)

Rich Franklin to return at UFC 88? (MMA Junkie)

Eight Truthful Celebrity Autobiography Covers. Mario Lopez’s life story is so close to my own… (HolyTaco)

Wal-Mart’s new logo looks terrible. (WallStreetFighter)

(Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

From a recent blog post on MacDanzig.net:

Forget what you heard! Mac is NOT fighting at UFC 87, or in August at all! Mac will most likely fight in September, and the fight has not yet been signed.

It’s possible that Danzig’s reported matchup with Clay Guida at “Seek and Destroy” (August 9th, Minneapolis, MN) will simply be moved to a later event. We’ll update you when we know more. In the meantime, another compelling lightweight matchup may be added to the card that would take a bit of the sting off the Danzig/Guida loss.

NBC Sports is reporting that exiled former #1 contender Hermes Franca will return to the Octagon at UFC 87 against Frankie Edgar. Due to a positive steroid test, Franca was given a one-year suspension after his lightweight title fight against Sean Sherk at UFC 73; the suspension ends on July 5th. Franca resigned from the UFC in order to make money fighting outside of the U.S. — though decided against competing when he learned that doing so could jeopardize his chances of getting licensed here again — so it’s interesting that the UFC is welcoming him back with open arms. Could Dana White be planning a steroid-free rematch between Franca and Sean Sherk sometime in the future?

In other UFC 87 news, Karo Parisyan says he’s been booked to fight at the event. He was expected to face George Sotiropoulos, but the TUF 6 semi-finalist was forced to pull out of the match due to injury, and a replacement hasn’t been found yet. Parisyan was most recently defeated by Thiago Alves at UFC Fight Night 13 in April.

(Props: BloodyElbow)

While other TUF 6 castmembers were content to put holes through walls and defecate in unauthorized areas of their toilet, Mac Danzig installed a birdfeeder in the house’s backyard to realign his karma in relation to the rest of the world’s creatures. It’s that attitude of “Leave things better than you found them” that’s part of the reason we became such huge Mac fans during last season of The Ultimate Fighter. Sure, he was a miserable asshole at times, but you try living with a bunch of idiots and see what it does to your morale. In this interview, Danzig talks about his matchup with Mark Bocek at UFC 83, the UFC’s stacked lightweight division, and moving to Las Vegas to join the Xtreme Couture camp.

(Props: Sherdog via BloodyElbow)

(Shane Carwin: Just one of the new faces looking for a big debut at UFC 84.)

— The UFC has confirmed the lineup for UFC 84: Ill Will (5/24, Las Vegas). Besides Penn/Sherk, Ortiz/Machida, and Silva/Jardine, the televised card will feature a light-heavyweight match between undefeated UFC newcomer Goran Reljic and Wilson Gouveia (who most recently knocked out Jason Lambert at UFC 80), as well as another 205-pound match between Thiago Silva and Octagon newbie Antonio “Samuray” Mendes. Ill Will’s undercard features appearances by Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou, Rob Emerson, Jon Koppenhaver, and new heavyweight acquisition Shane Carwin. Check out the complete card here.

— Shooto has announced their 20th anniversary show on May 3rd, and it’s shaping up to be a killer. Japanese welterweight star Hayato “Mach” Sakurai — whose last three fights resulted in wins against Hidetaka Monma at DREAM.1, Hidehiko Hasegawa at Yarennoka!, and Mac Danzig at PRIDE 33 — will be taking on 13-2 submission specialist David Baron, while “Lion” Takeshi Inoue and Rumina Sato will also compete against opponents to be named later.

— After suffering a nasty eye injury last September during a fight against Gesias Calvancante, Vitor “Shaolin” Ribeiro is back in the gym and planning his next move. That t-shirt he’s wearing should help to explain why we think he’s the fifth greatest lightweight in the world.

(Behind every great man is a woman with three kinds of hepatitis.)

It looks like all we’re gonna do on CagePotato today is post videos and talk about UFC fight bookings. But I hear that’s a good cure for a case of the Mondays, so unless there are any objections, here’s some other notable stuff that we either overlooked earlier, or has popped up since.

— B.J. Penn/Sean Sherk will likely go down at UFC 85 on May 24th in Las Vegas. According to Penn, Sherk is “dead.”

— This questionably sourced post on MMAFightline.com claims that the UFC is in talks to sign three of the biggest stars of Japanese MMA: Takanori Gomi, Hayato “Mach” Sakurai, and Norifumi “Kid” Yamamoto. Marcus Davis called out Gomi after his victory at UFC 80, and getting Sakurai in the UFC’s lightweight division would give Mac Danzig an opportunity to avenge his last loss. Yamamoto fights at 143 pounds, so Zuffa would be wise to sign him to the WEC in order to set up a match with Urijah Faber; Faber wants to fight Yamamoto more than anyone else.

(Remember this? Because Houston Alexander doesn’t…)

According to an interview on Tatame.com (translated into English here), undefeated light heavyweight Thiago Silva claims he’ll be fighting Rashad Evans on May 24th. Excellent news, considering that we were just wondering when Silva was going to get another fight, and Evans could really use a definitive beat-down. On Rashad and the rest of the UFC’s LH division, Silva said:

I wanna continue unbeaten, that’s my goal. I know he likes to get down and work on ground n’ pound. He has a heavy hand too, but nothing that scares me. I’ll work on a better way to defeat him, because I wanna fight for the UFC belt this year…There’s a lot of guys that I would like to fight in UFC, but I think I would [like] to fight against Lyoto Machida and Chuck Liddell, because they like an exchanging fight.

Silva, a former member of the famed Chute Boxe academy, also stated that he’ll be joining the Florida-based American Top Team outfit at the end of the month, where he’ll get to roll with such MMA heavy-hitters as Denis Kang, Jeff Monson, Gesias Cavalcante, Marcus Maximus Aurelio, and Alessio Sakara.

In other news, TUF 6 winner Mac Danzig has been booked to face Mark Bocek at UFC 84, according to The Fight Network. The event goes down April 19 at the Bell Centre in Montreal; it’s been rumored that Rich Franklin and Mauricio Rua will also be on the card, but so far only the Serra/St. Pierre main event seems to be officially confirmed. Bocek, a Brazilian jiu-jitsu specialist from Toronto, had a 4-0 record before entering the UFC, where he suffered a TKO loss to Frankie Edgar at UFC 73 in July, then won a decision against Doug Evans during the undercard of UFC 79: “Nemesis.” In other words, the guy’s no pushover, but he’s about as inexperienced as the rest of the reality show jokers that Mac had to dispose of on The Ultimate Fighter, and the fightin’ vegan should have no problem turning his first UFC lightweight match into a victory.

So, Mac Danzig proved a few things at Saturday’s Ultimate Fighter 6 finale: 1) I should really stop making public predictions. 2) Experience trumps raw power. 3) With his killer ground-and-pound and the ability to end nearly every fight in a rear naked choke, Danzig may already be a top-5 contender in the UFC’s lightweight division. The UFC is pretty aggressive about pulling their vids from YouTube, so get it while it’s hot…

Hey CagePotato fans, this is Greg Clark from MMA Fever, I’ll be filling in for Ben as he recovers from his breast-reduction surgery, so let’s dive into The Ultimate Fighter 6 Finale shall we…

Ben Saunders vs. Dan Barrera

The first fight of the Spike TV televised card set the tone for the rest of the night: Brutal, nasty, and damn entertaining.

Saunders defeated Barrera in Episode 6 by majority decision, so this bout was a true grudge match for both fighters to showcase their talent to the UFC and its fans.

Ben Saunders started round 1 demonstrating his superior striking skills, complemented by his leg kicks from his 6’3″ frame that connected on Barrera at will.  The fight was filled with back-and-forth action, but Barrera, who had been coached by Matt Hughes, showed that he was way out of his league against the Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu specialist when the fight went to the ground.

At one point, Saunders had Barrera’s back and put him in a body lock which set up the rear naked choke attempt.  As both fighters were dripping with sweat, Barrera was able to escape the bout ending submission.  Saunders stuffed Barrera’s takedowns easily which appeared to be the only weapon he had during the fight.  He also dominated on the ground and clearly won rounds 1, 2 and 3 for the unanimous decision victory against the battle worn Barrera.

Ben Saunders def. Dan Barrera via unanimous decision

Next up: Rogan’s Matt Hughes interview

Following in the footsteps of past Ultimate Fighter finalists like Rashad Evans, Joe Stevenson, and Diego Sanchez, Mac Danzig plans to drop down in weight class after Saturday’s TUF finale — no matter what the outcome of his fight against Tommy Speer. As he says in a profile on UFC.com:

“I decided that before I even went on the show. I really have no business fighting the top five guys at 170, or even the top ten when it comes down to it. It’s not that I can’t beat them, but if you put me in with Matt Hughes or Georges St-Pierre ten times, I’m gonna win a number of those times, but realistically, with all skills being the same, those guys are extremely skilled and much bigger than me. I walk around at 170, those guys walk around at 190, so it’s not a good idea for me. I really want to make a run for a title, and 155 is my weight class. I feel that within a couple of years I can be a world champion at 155.”

Danzig has shown tremendous balls in moving up from from his natural weight to compete on The Ultimate Fighter — and for saying that he could beat Matt Hughes on a good day — and dropping down to lightweight is clearly the right move for his career. But God damn, the UFC really needs to put the brakes on this tradition of finalists dropping down in weight as soon as the show ends. The second season of TUF was partly intended to inject fresh blood into the heavyweight division; of the two finalists, one (Rashad Evans) immediately dropped down to light-heavyweight and the other (Brad Imes) doesn’t even compete in the UFC anymore. The next season of the show will feature middleweights in an attempt to get some new names in the hat for the UFC’s second-weakest division, but the finalists could easily drop down to 170 pounds afterwards, adding to the welterweight division’s gridlock. Many suggestions have been offered to aid The Ultimate Fighter‘s sinking ratings — would it hurt to have the competitors sign an agreement stating that the weight class they competed at on the show is the one they’ll stay at for the length of their initial UFC contract? At this point, I feel that anything that would make the seasons’ results matter more in the long run could help maintain the interest of fans, who are jumping the TUF ship in droves due to its predictability.

Thoughts?

Mac Danzig was already a fully-formed competitor by the time he stepped into the ring at King of the Cage: Shock and Awe (10/1/05). Riding a six-fight win streak (which would eventually become a 12-fight win streak), the future KOTC lightweight champ uses his flawless technique to take apart opponent Frank Kirmse. When it’s over, he climbs to his feet and shrugs, seemingly without a scratch or even a drop of sweat on his forehead — a sign of things to come for the castmembers of The Ultimate Fighter 6.

How quickly the game changes. Despite all his efforts in reminding his team to breathe, Matt Serra’s two remaining fighters were eliminated on last night’s episode of The Ultimate Fighter. As Matt Serra himself might say, “Ouch!” Let’s take it from the top…

The episode opens tragically, with Matt Arroyo suffering a rib injury while practicing with Richie useless motherfucking Hightower. He tries to work through it, but the pain convinces him to see the doctor; the prognosis is a small crack in the rib and deep bruising. The doctor doesn’t actually forbid him from fighting, but Arroyo knows that he wouldn’t be able to get through two rounds against Mac Danzig in the shape he’s in, so he takes himself out of the competition. Dana White, who has maybe never fought with a broken rib before, pressures Arroyo into fighting hurt (“words cannot fuckin’ describe what you’re giving up”), and basically calls him a filthy quitter, but Arroyo makes the right choice and stays sidelined, which means a replacement has to be found.

Dana and Matt Serra interview War Machine, Troy, and Richie to see if they’d step in against Mac. The guys want absolutely nothing to do with him. Richie is concerned about dropping 20 pounds in three days; I’m just as concerned that he apparently gained 20 pounds in three days. Anyway, as we all knew would happen, Smilin’ John Kolosci rolls in, pleads for the fight against Mac, and he gets it.

This doesn’t sit well at all with Mac, who looks nervous for the first time all season. “I beat this guy decisively, and he gets another chance to fight me, and if he beats me he’s in the finals?” he asks. Mac starts worrying about getting caught with a shot from Kolosci, who, as Mac points out, has by now “figured out what not to do” against him.

Then there’s this awful commercial for Wahl beard trimmers, co-starring Andre Arlovski:

I just came across this pre-TUF Peta2.com interview with Mac Danzig, where the former King of the Cage lightweight champ discusses his career and his conversion to veganism. Some highlights:

What made you go vegan? How long has it been?
Ever since I can remember, I’ve always had a profound respect and interest in nature and animals. I remember being 13 and seeing a truck on the interstate filled with pigs all headed to the slaughterhouse. One of them made eye contact with me for a while. It was one of the saddest moments I can remember. There was so much intelligence and spirit in him, and here he was, being sent to an awful death…I experimented with a vegan diet for about a year, but once I started training full-time for fighting, I believed what certain people said and started eating chicken again because I thought that I had to have some kind of animal protein in order to be a successful athlete…about 2 years ago, I read a Mike Mahler article on an animal rights Web site where he explained his vegan diet for training in detail, and I said, “That’s it—I can do it too,” and I started 100 percent vegan again for life and I’ve never looked back. I feel great.

Has being vegan helped your training and helped you maintain your weight class?
Absolutely. When I decided to go vegan, I was able to make the 155-pound weight class much easier, and I haven’t lost an ounce of muscle. I’m leaner than I used to be, and I have much more energy than I used to.

What are your favorite vegan foods generally, and what do you eat when you’re training?
When I’m not in training, I eat Soy Delicious ice cream and vegan chocolate chip cookies like they’re going out of style. There’s also some awesome vegan restaurants out here in L.A., like Native Foods, that have great vegan pizza. When I’m in training, I eat a lot of brown rice, tofu, oatmeal, and of course lots of vegetables and fruit.

I already knew that tofu makes babies gay…but could it also be responsible for Mac’s famous mood swings and sociopathic lack of sympathy? In the absence of any kind of data, I’m gonna go with “probably.” Plus, I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t enjoy a good cheeseburger…

In last night’s episode of The Ultimate Fighter, the quarterfinal matches were announced, Mac Danzig upsets the entire animal kingdom, Ray Longo turns out to be one of those guys who pronounces “penalized” as “peenalized,” and Jon Kolosci goes out like a punk. Read on, if you dare…