(Needing to decide upon his future in the UFC, Swick galloped into a wooded glen, and after punch-dancing out his rage and suffering an extremely long and very painful fall, he realized what had to be done.)

To quote David After Dentist, “Is this real life?”

Outdated reference? Sure, but to give you some perspective, the last time anyone saw UFC welterweight Mike Swick in action, that little SOB’s anesthesia adventure was the biggest Youtube sensation going. It has really been that long.

But it seems the man known as “Quick” will finally step back into the octagon before his mid-life crisis hits him, as he has been scheduled to take on TUF 9 alum Damarques “Darkness” Johnson at UFC on FOX 4, which goes down at the Staples Center in Los Angeles on August 4th.

(This game of strip poker would have been a lot more fun if Swick had any desire at all to see you guys naked.)

Though Mike Swick’s injury proved to be a major bummer for a UFC 103 card that could have really used a number-one contender fight to improve its overall appeal, the withdrawal just might end up getting Swick the fight he wanted to begin with.  Before the UFC matched him up against Martin Kampmann, Swick asked for Matt Hughes.  When he didn’t get it, he gladly took the fight with Kampmann, which the UFC later said would determine who got the next shot at Georges St. Pierre.  Now Swick says he could be ready to go again as soon as UFC 104, and, if you don’t mind, he’d like to make a suggestion about a possible opponent: 

 No next opponent has been offered, but yes I would love to fight Hughes. I will be ready by UFC 104 so just waiting for the UFC to call. … I have no set return yet. I just said I will be ready by UFC 104. So 104, 105, 106, 107… I will fight as soon as I get an opportunity!

The UFC didn’t listen to his pleas the first time, but this might actually work.  Hughes just re-upped for a few more fights, and UFC 104 might become more of a must-see if Swick-Hughes bumps Gleison Tibau-Josh Neer to the dark portion of the card.