(Props: ztube11320 via KickYoNuts)

Yeah, this clip might be four years old, but we’ve never seen it before, and we literally watch everything on the Internet that’s related to MMA — even the crap that’s only related in a vague, tangential sort of way — so it’s probably new to you as well. During a 2009 C3 MMA event in Hammond, Indiana, a pair of sluggers nearly produced the world’s first through-the-ropes double knockout. If only the white guy with the braids had lost consciousness, this would probably be the greatest fight-ending in the history of the sport. I guess you’ll just have to settle for one guy getting KO’d out of the ring. At any rate, it goes great with that first cup of coffee.

(Props: OOFights.com)

Whew, does anyone else need a break from all this Nick Diaz/GSP/UFC 158 hype for a moment? I mean, I could listen to those two hurl insults at each other in broken English all day, but every now and again, I just want to see someone get knocked the fudge out, you know?

Thankfully, a video has recently been released of the battle between 3-0 KO artist Scott Noble and the debuting Francis Grant, which went down on December 1st of last year at OO Fights XXII in Virginia. And when I say “battle,” I mean a lone flying head kick that had Grant singing the Sleepsong just five seconds into the fight.

Look at it this way, Francis; your professional debut could have gone worse, I guess. You could have died.

-J. Jones

(Fighter escapes power-bomb to land big knockout on neckbearded savage, via MMA: Inside the Cage.)

- Dana White Goes Off Again on Jon Jones, Greg Jackson (MMAFighting)

- Contracts, How Do They Work? The Bellator Story (BloodyElbow)

- UFC 153 Timetable: How The Rio Card Recovered From Devastation (HeavyMMA)

- Matt Lindland Discusses His Future, Fedor Emelianenko, Fallout With the UFC, And More (Fightline)

- Woman vs. Workout: Model Lauren Berlingeri Learns the MMA Basics With Louis Gaudinot (YouTube.com/3V)

- Must…resist…horsemeat joke… (Facebook.com/CagePotato)

- A Female MMA Fighter Will Be a Character in the Upcoming ‘Dead or Alive 5′ Game (MiddleEasy)

- The 25 Fittest Football Players (MensFitness)

- The 50 Most Brutal Hits in NFL History (Complex)

- Movie Supercut Video: Animals Covering Their Eyes With Their Paws (FilmDrunk)

- The 50 Coolest Kids in the History of the Internet (WorldWideInterweb)

- How to Fight With Your Wife (MadeMan)

- 20 Extremely Remote Landmarks (EgoTV)

(In honor of MMAInsidetheCage‘s 100th episode, they put together their 100 favorite knockouts featured on the show. Incredible.)

- Forrest Griffin: ‘Tito [Ortiz] Was Jon Jones Before There Was A Jon Jones’ (Fightline)

- After Nearly Losing Toe In Training Injury, Tim Kennedy Set for Second Crack at Belt (MMAFighting)

- Rashad Evans Willing to Drop to 185 Pounds for Fight With Anderson Silva (FiveOuncesofPain)

- Ronda Rousey Featured Nude in ESPN Body Issue (HeavyMMA)

- Ahead of Title Shot, Strikeforce’s Nate Marquardt Says He Feels Great Without TRT (MMAJunkie)

- Melvin Guillard Exclusive: A Man Living in Memory of His Father (BleacherReport/MMA)

- Video: Chuck Norris Imports Gracie Family in 1988 to Train Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu
(MMAMania)

- ‘Ted’ Star Mark Wahlberg is Greater Than the Sum of His Parts (MensFitness)

- The Man’s Guide to Survival in a Post-Apocalyptic World (DoubleViking)

- 6 People Who Will Ruin Your 4th of July Party (HolyTaco)

- An In-Depth Profile of a Lady Who Makes Fart Fetish Videos (FilmDrunk)

- Hey, Have You Seen That Video of the Bulgarian Sprinter’s Leg Shattering? (Break.com)

(Props: Zee2tehPee)

If Strikeforce gave out performance bonuses like their big brothers at the UFC, the “Barnett vs. Kharitonov“ prelim match between Evangelista “Cyborg” Santos and rising Canadian star Jordan Mein would be a front-runner for Fight of the Night. After two entertaining rounds of stand-up, Mein ended the match in the third frame with the nastiest display of standing elbows in MMA history. Seriously, that’s not an exaggeration. Skip to about the 1:45 mark and tell me I’m wrong — this might even give Anderson Silva vs. Tony Fryklund a run for its money. To see the first two rounds of the fight (and everything else from the prelims), swing by IronForgesIron.

Mein’s victory upped his career record to 23-7, and lengthened a win streak that includes victories over Joe Riggs, Josh Burkman, and Marius Zaromskis. He’s been fighting professionally since 2006, and he’s 21 years old. You do the math on that one.

After the jump: Another highly satisfying knockout from the Strikeforce prelims, this one involving former light-heavyweight champ Rafael Cavalcante and Olympic freestyle wrestling silver medalist (and Strikeforce first-timer) Yoel Romero. We set up the video to skip past the first ten minutes of Romero avoiding the fight and taunting Feijao at every opportunity; trust us, we’re doing you a favor. When Cavalcante finally catches up with his dick-headed opponent, it is so, so good.

(LOL, walk much?)

This Saturday, MMA’s greatest knockout artist returns against Yushin Okami in a rematch at UFC 134 — and I stress the word “artist.” Anderson Silva inflicts punishment on his opponents in ways that transcend combat sports, opening our eyes to the enormity of human possibility and the deeper meanings of the universe. In honor of his next fight, we decided to rank our ten favorite Anderson Silva knockouts of all time. Enjoy, and let us know your personal favorite in the comments section…

#10: Anderson Silva vs. Jorge Rivera
Cage Rage 11, 4/30/05

Silva’s first Cage Rage middleweight title defense — after outpointing Lee Murray for the belt the previous year — ended in a storm of knees. This would become a common theme in his subsequent UFC career.

(Props: TheCageDoor.net via MMA Scraps. Fight starts at the 0:19 mark.)

It’s one of the biggest bitch-moves in MMA — acting like you’re going to tap gloves at the start of a fight like a gentleman, and then launching a surprise attack as soon as your opponent is in range. (For examples, see here, here, and here.) At a Legacy FC event in Houston on July 31st, JR Fuller decided to try the unsportsmanlike technique himself, but instead of firing an overhand right like the successful fakers that came before him, he shoots for a takedown. Big mistake. Jonathan Harris throws a perfectly-timed knee, Fuller eats it and hits the mat face-first, Tyson Griffin-style. The official time of the stoppage was 0:05, but the jackass was really out within two seconds. Proving once again, boys and girls: Cheaters never prosper. 

(Bisping, Arlovski, Griffin, and Swanson: Four of the year’s most unfortunate victims.)

#25: Vitor Belfort sends Matt Lindland into convulsions at Affliction: Day of Reckoning (1/24/09).

#24. Gegard Mousasi makes his presence known in America by pounding Renato Sobral flat at Strikeforce: Carano vs. Cyborg (8/15/09).

#23: Matt Hamill unleashes his inner Cro Cop against Mark Munoz at UFC 96 (3/7/09).

IF YOU MISSED KNOCKOUTS #25-13, CLICK HERE.

#12: Fedor Emelianenko adds Brett Rogers to his vast collection of scalps at Strikeforce: Fedor vs. Rogers (11/7/09).

#11: Brian Bowles shocks the world, earns the WEC’s bantamweight title, and breaks Miguel Torres‘s 17-fight win streak at WEC 42 (8/9/09).

#10: Lyoto Machida makes Rashad Evans do the stanky leg at UFC 98. (5/23/09)

#9: Dan Hornbuckle starches Akihiro Gono with a kick to the face at Sengoku 9 — then takes a moment to think about what he’s done (8/2/09).

#8: Scott Smith pulls off the greatest comeback knockout of the year against Cung Le at Strikeforce: Evolution (12/19/09).

#7: Dan Henderson shuts Michael Bisping‘s big spotted-dick-eating mouth at UFC 100 (7/11/09).

#6 (tie): Marius Zaromskis high-kicks Hayato Sakurai into a living death at the DREAM welterweight GP semi-finals; later that same night, Marius Zaromskis does the same exact thing to Jason High (7/20/09). Congrats, Jason, you’re on the wrong end of this list twice.

#5: Yahir Reyes cracks Estevan Payan with what might be the nastiest spinning-backfist in MMA history at Bellator 6. (5/8/09)

#4: Jose Aldo needs just 8 seconds and a well-timed flying knee to wreck Cub Swanson — and earn a title shot — at WEC 41 (6/7/09).

#3: Anderson Silva shows Forrest Griffin the true power of a Jedi at UFC 101 (8/8/09).

#2: Fedor Emelianenko shoots Andrei Arlovski out of the air at Affliction: Day of Reckoning (1/24/09).

Fedor vs. Arlovski – Watch more Funny Videos

#1: Marcus "Lelo" Aurelio proves that Capoeira is MMA’s most effective style — at least for one night — against Keegan Marshall at North American Challenge 24 (4/4/09).

(Props: bigguvnor)

You have to hand it to British MMA fighters — what they lack in technique, they more than make up for in willingness to flail their arms around until someone gets knocked out. Like a pasty, heavyweight version of Sanchez vs. Guida, Ashley Pollard and Ian Hawkings gave the crowd what they paid for at Ultimate Challenge UK in August, slugging it out like two albino gorillas fighting over a female in estrus. Pollard eventually won when Hawkings’s natural instinct to run like hell got the better of him. Deal with it, Floyd Mayweather!

(Props: MMA Scraps)

Here’s some "Before They Were MMA Stars" footage of Kenny Florian, kicking ass in his second pro fight against Bobby McAndrews. This went down at Mass Destruction 15 (2/21/04, Boston), where Joe Lauzon and Alex Karalexis also picked up wins. Florian would only have one more match — a decision loss to Drew Fickett — before he joined the cast of TUF 1, which would drastically alter the course of his career. For more Ken-Flo, check out this extended interview with SportsCenter.

(Props: BloodyElbow)

According to Kenny Florian, his October 2006 loss to Sean Sherk transformed him from a fighter who wanted to compete with his opponents to a fighter who wants to destroy his opponents — and he’ll be bringing his renewed intensity to the cage with him against BJ Penn at UFC 101 (August 8th, Philadelphia). In this recent interview with Inside MMA, Florian also discusses training with Georges St. Pierre, getting his named botched by Dr. Phil, and his four-letter prediction for the Penn scrap. By the way, if BJ bitches out between now and August and drops out of the fight, Diego Sanchez is totally cool to step in.