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20 Celebrities With Truly Awful Tattoos

Tag: MMA videos

Quote of the Day: Conor McGregor Was Collecting Welfare Before 60k “Knockout of the Night” Bonus


(I can’t tell you what my strategy was going in, nor can I tell you who the UFC would like me to face next. All I can tell you is that I’m just a man looking for the bastard children who took me Lucky Charms.) 

There was something incredibly familiar about Conor McGregor from the moment he started mean-mugging Marcus Brimage at the UFC on FUEL 9 weigh-ins. His brash arrogance, his complete lack of respect for his opponent’s game, hell, even his body type was positively…Diazian. And although his actual respect for Brimage in his post-fight interview and snappy attire at the post-fight press conference were anything but, we couldn’t help but be reminded of Nick Diaz while McGregor was explaining how dire his financial situation was before earning a $60,000 “Knockout of the Night” bonus last weekend:

I’m just happy I won $60K. I’m just thinking on what I’m going to spend it on. I’ll buy myself a car anyway. A nice car, may be some suits or something. Custom made suits, I don’t know.

Just last week I was collecting the social welfare, you know what I mean? I was in there saying to them like, ‘I don’t know what going to happen. I’m signed to the UFC. I don’t know what….blah, blah, blah. But now I supposed I’m gonna have to tell them to f— off!

I didn’t have money before this… I was collecting 188 Euro ($245) a week off the social welfare. And now here I am, with like 60gs bonus and then my own pay. I don’t know what the f—s going on to be honest, right? 

Granted, it’s not exactly “I didn’t go to school for buying a house” levels of silliness, but you’ve got to…respect is the wrong word here…appreciate (?) the guy who openly admits to being on welfare literally seconds before sharing his plans to purchase custom tailored suits. Like Old Dirty Bastard before him, Conor McGregor will be an OG until the day he dies.

A full video of the UFC on FUEL 9 press conference is after the jump. 

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[VIDEO] How to Spend Your Day Off, According to Dana White

You know, I may not have a fleet of G5 airplanes or an insanely successful, multi-million dollar company at my disposal, although I totally could if it wasn’t for my bum knee. I may not be part of a secret group of rich adulterers that smash the hottest trim in shanty towns across the globe, or show up to Hollywood premiers with Ronda Rousey on my arm — again, I’m blaming the bum knee. But despite all this, I take solace in the fact that — regardless of whether you’re UFC President Dana White or Skeeter the local angry drunk – as men, we all like to let loose in pretty much the same fashion. Mainly, getting our friends to embarrass themselves and blowing shit up.

So goes the latest Danavlog (seen above), in which The Baldfather grants us behind-the-scenes access to the one day off he gets each year. And oddly enough, DW doesn’t spend it getting a mani-pedi and eating veal that was killed in front of him like most of his fellow 1%ers. Instead, he spends it at his house in Maine with a few of his closest buddies, completing the redneck superfecta of hot sauce challenges, goat milking, skeet shooting, and hitting 125 mph on his dirt bike. Seriously, if White did all of this while slugging down Labbatt Blues, chain smoking cowboy killers, and demanding that Barack Obama show us his damn birth certificate already, I’d be convinced that we were born in the same town.

Then again, this is the same millionaire who willingly throws himself into mosh pits when he’s not cussing out members of the MMA media, so perhaps we should stop acting surprised when DW continuously defies our expectations for how the President of a major sports organization should act. Party on, Dana. Party on.

-J. Jones

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Knockout of the Day: Scott Noble Sleeps Francis Grant via Flying Head Kick at OO Fights XXII


(Props: OOFights.com)

Whew, does anyone else need a break from all this Nick Diaz/GSP/UFC 158 hype for a moment? I mean, I could listen to those two hurl insults at each other in broken English all day, but every now and again, I just want to see someone get knocked the fudge out, you know?

Thankfully, a video has recently been released of the battle between 3-0 KO artist Scott Noble and the debuting Francis Grant, which went down on December 1st of last year at OO Fights XXII in Virginia. And when I say “battle,” I mean a lone flying head kick that had Grant singing the Sleepsong just five seconds into the fight.

Look at it this way, Francis; your professional debut could have gone worse, I guess. You could have died.

-J. Jones

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[VIDEO] Full Replay of the ‘UFC 158: St. Pierre vs. Diaz’ Pre-Fight Press Conference


(Talk about mental warfare, Diaz has gotten so far inside GSP’s head that the champ has apparently forgotten how to hold his hands during a staredown. Look at him, he looks like he’s trying to restrain his excitement while watching a cheerleading competition.) 

The Nick Diaz crazy train continues to roll on, Potato Nation, and was on full display during today’s UFC 158: St. Pierre vs. Diaz pre-fight presser. First, when addressing why he had missed the open workouts — something Nick originally attributed to the UFC’s…I don’t know, flight scheduling? — Diaz claimed that he needed his sleep and that “it was either I miss yesterday’s open workout or I miss this.” Then, when questioned on whether or not he would pass his drug test this time around, Diaz dropped this gem:

I think [at UFC 143] I tested for a metabolite or a nanogram, it was hardly [a trace] so I just did a little more than I did last time so, sorry if I don’t pass the test, but I think it should work out. I’ve passed plenty of them before, unless they just weren’t testing me. I wonder how much they test people around here (glancing at St. Pierre). 

Seriously, this guy is like Sir Smoke-A-LotBurt Gummer, and the main character from Pi rolled into one tight, angel dust-laced doober. Are you still questioning whether or not Diaz is the antihero the MMA world so desperately needs?

Check out the full video of the pre-fight presser after the jump for all of these highlights and more, and make sure to swing by our liveblog of UFC 158 on Saturday starting at 10 p.m. EST.

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[VIDEO] Scariest BJJ Coach Ever, Wanderlei Silva, Coaches Son to Glorious Victory

Wanderlei Silva Chris Leben UFC 132
(The family who pimps together, stays together.) 

Folks on the mats at Brazilian Jiu Jitsu tournaments tend to notice whenever a coach is shouting our instructions to their students in Portuguese or even a Portuguese accent. The reason being that it probably means they are from the fighting style’s native country and therefore know certain deadly secrets to convey to their pupils in their mystical coded language.

Or something.

The point is, some times the opposition can get psyched out by the ol’ Romance languages during tournaments. Imagine you’re a coach doing his best to prep a young student for his or her first Jiu Jitsu match and then you hear their opponent’s coach talking to them in Gracie-speak. Now, imagine if said Brazilian coach was Wanderlei Freaking Silva coaching his own son in his first tournament.

That’s just what happened last weekend, as Wandy was recorded…er…recording his son’s very first tournament performance whilst shouting instructions that likely left everyone else’s dad looking for the nearest exit. Fresh off a brutal KO victory of Brian Stann at UFC on FUEL 8, Wandy showed up, head shaved, tribal skull tattoo on full display, but holding a cell phone camera up to his face to capture his son on tape just like any other dad. Check out the video of Silva coaching his son, Thor, after the jump.

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Mondays Suck, So Here’s a 14-Second Double Knockout to Tide You Over [VIDEO]


(Major props to MiddleEasy for the find.) 

Typically, a Monday morning at the CagePotato offices starts with cake. Lots of cake. There’s a staff meeting after that, again, typically held in the context of an underground cockfight or at the very least a back alley dice game. The rest of the day is as you’d expect: team-building medicine ball dodgeball at 11, lunch at Matsuhisa at 1, a full two-hour break to “research” WMMA videos at 3, and finally, Mr. Pibbs and a staff-voted episode of The Wire at 5. The writing usually happens after dodgeball.

But alas, not everyone’s Mondays can be as exhilarating or PCP-laced as ours. That’s where this video of a 14-second double knockout from last Saturday’s Galaxy Fight Night IV comes into play. Because, as you watch Aaron Britt and Brandon Alexander trade right hands and simultaneously topple over like a pair of felled oaks, you will experience nearly one-eighteenth of the life-affirming invigoration that fills the average CagePotato employee on a daily basis. It’s not something most people get to experience in the span of their measly, infinitesimal lives, let alone on a Monday morning at work. So enjoy this, you guys.

After the jump: Nick Diaz, hitting a speed bag, for 23 straight minutes. It is the lethargic, insomnia-inducing yin to this video’s captivating yang, and it will break you.

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Bellator 89 Results and Videos: Dantas KO’s Galvao to Defend Bantamweight Title, The ‘Rhino Era’ Continues


(Eduardo Dantas vs. Marcos Galvao video, via allthebestfights.com. Fight starts at the 1:48 mark)

So far, Eduardo Dantas‘s run in Bellator has been flawless. The aggressive Nova União member went 3-0 during the Season 5 bantamweight tournament in 2011, then choked out Zach Makovsky last year to win the promotion’s 135-pound title. Four months later, Dantas fooled around and got knocked out by American prospect Tyson Nam in an utterly meaningless fight for Shooto Brazil. (Bellator responded by threatening to sue Tyson Nam. Not a good look, guys.)

Last night’s Bellator 89 main event offered “DuDu” a shot at redemption, and fortunately, he rose to the occasion. Dantas made his first Bellator title defense against his teammate and former mentor Marcos Galvao, who won last year’s Season 6 bantamweight tourney. Dantas’s stiff jab and overall accuracy gave him the edge in the opening frame, and he turned up the heat even further in round 2, out-landing Galvao and rocking him with a head-kick. After a few more striking exchanges, Dantas found his kill-shot — a right-uppercut that buckled Galvao and sent him to the mat. A few more hammer-fists from the top, and it was lights out for the challenger.

Dantas was very emotional following the fight. “I’m sad and happy,” he said. “Sad because I had to fight my friend, and happy to still be champion of Bellator.” See? It’s not the end of the world, guys.

Bellator 89 also featured the Season 8 middleweight quarterfinals, which featured Bellator vets Brett Cooper and Dan Cramer picking up decision wins (over Norman Paraisy and Brian Rogers, respectively), as well as Russian newcomer Sultan Aliev out-pointing previously undefeated Mikkel Parlo. And let’s talk about Doug Marshall for a second, shall we? After showing up at Bellator 82 and KO’ing Kala Hose in 22 seconds, the former WEC light-heavyweight champ entered the middleweight bracket last night against Season 6 middleweight tournament finalist Andreas Spang, and knocked him out in just three minutes, adding another entry to the walkoff KO hall of fame. A couple more fights like this, and Marshall will have to change his nickname from “The Rhino” to “The White Hector Lombard.”

After the jump: Videos of the Marshall vs. Spang fight as well as a 15-second armbar from the prelims, and complete event results.

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[VIDEO] The Pros Pick ‘UFC on FX 7: Belfort vs. Bisping’


(Props to Sportsnet for the vid.)

And now kids, it’s time for some completely necessary last-minute hype for tomorrow’s UFC on FX 7 event, featuring such pros as Matt Brown, Alexander Gustafsson, and flyweight champion Demetrious Johnson making their picks for the main event middleweight showdown between Michael Bisping and Vitor Belfort. The matchup has started to gain a lot steam — thanks in no small part to a particularly intense staredown at the pre-fight press conference yesterday — resulting in the event nearly reaching a sellout despite slow ticket sales in the early going.

The video doesn’t feature too many stars, but the general consensus among them seems to be that if Bisping can survive the early onslaught, he should be able to take a decision over Belfort. Truly a shocking revelation when you realize that half of Belfort’s losses have come via decision and that Bisping has never defeated an upper-echelon opponent by anything else.

But enough small talk. Who do you like for this one and how?

-J. Jones

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[VIDEO] Full Recap of ‘Strikeforce: Marquardt vs. Saffiedine’

Fun Fact: According to our Strikeforce underdog poll, a staggering majority of you Taters thought Ed Herman stood the best chance of pulling off an upset over Ronaldo Souza. In a distant second was that of the now retired Mike Kyle, and in an even more distant third was a tie between “Mike Goldberg over his drug addiction” and “Barnett’s ability to piss clean.” In short, the results were hurtful, hilarious, and wildly incorrect, which is exactly the kind of rapport we’ve been trying to establish around here for the past five years. So take in this kudos, Potato Nation, because like a rich, neglectful father in a children’s holiday movie, it will be a long time before we willingly give you another compliment.

But on the off chance you didn’t vote in our poll or even tune in for Strikeforce’s final event (Full disclosure: I am catching up on the fights as I write this. KJ Noons should be on his way to a clear cut UD victory, right?), we’ve placed a full video recap of the main card above. So sit back and let Pat Militech’s soothing baritone take you back to a night of squash matches topped off by Tarec Saffiedine’s destruction of Nate Marquardt’s leg, which apparently next to none of you saw coming.

-J. Jones

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[VIDEO] Irish Phenom Conor McGregor Becomes Two-Division CWFC Champ Via One-Punch KO

Ladies and gentlemen, may we introduce to you the white Michael Page. His name is Conor McGregor, and on Monday he became the first two-division (featherweight and now lightweight — you hear that, Andy?) champion in Cage Warriors Fighting Championship history by starching Ivan Buchinger in the opening round of their headlining matchup at Cage Warriors 51. Combining some insanely fast hands with a flashy capoeira background, the Irishman has quickly made a name for himself in the European MMA scene, thanks in no small part to the fact that he has collected all of his twelve victories via stoppage (11 KO, 1 sub), including a four second knockout of perhaps the most Irish-named man of them all, Paddy Doherty.

McGregor’s most recent bit of handiwork is above, but join us after the jump to get real familiar with Ireland’s hottest rising prospect.

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