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21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

Tag: MMA videos

[VIDEO] Deadmau5 Snags a UFC Sponsorship, Then Pisses All Over It In Latest Music Video


(We should be surprised that not ONE of those dudes is checking out Arianny’s ass, right?) 

I’m going to come right out and say it: I don’t get Dubstep. It’s loud and annoying for the sake of being loud and annoying, and 95% of the songs I have heard seem to aimlessly drift between bass drops and cartoonish, cookie-cutter sound effects blatantly lifted from “artist” to “artist” before coming to a crashing, albeit relieving end. In my opinion, Dubstep is little more than the musical personification of the ever-increasing laziness and style-over-substance attitude of current American society. It is the genre Michael Bay would have created if he wasn’t too busy giving the world cinematic diabetes. So on a musical level, I find pretty much everything that the character known as deadmau5 has created to be utterly incompetent horseshit.

And it appears that his music video for the track “Professional Griefers,” which somehow managed to snag the endorsement of the UFC, falls right in line with that belief.

Not only does the video portray MMA fans as drunken, inbred rednecks, but this Dead Mouse feller even has the balls to replace legendary UFC announcer Bruce Buffer with some roided-up neanderthal behind the mic. But hey, IT’S GOT COMPUTER ANIMATED FIGHTS AND CRASHBOOMRAWR, YOU GUYS!! And Arianny Celeste’s breasts even make an appearance, so it’s all good!

Video after the jump. 

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[VIDEOS] UFC Legends Gracie, Couture, Coleman, and Ortiz Discuss Favorite Fighters, Respect + More


(The gang discusses favorite/greatest MMA fighters. Spoiler alert: You probably don’t agree with them.) 

If you’ve visited CagePotato in the past year or so, you are undoubtedly aware of the entertainment that a roundtable discussion between friends can bring. From memorable fighter run-ins to the P4P baddest motherfuckers ever, we have held many a debate in this fashion, and as is usually the case, the UFC and FuelTV have once again decided to ride in on our coattails. They began with the thoroughly captivating Champions edition, which featured the likes of Forrest Griffin, Jon Jones, Chuck Liddell, and Frank Mir discussing everything from the dark days of the UFC to its meteoric rise, and have continued the series recently with a panel of fighters that can only be described as “legendary.”

Randy Couture, Royce Gracie, Mark Coleman, and Tito Ortiz sit in for this edition, and dish on respect, favorite fighters, regrets, and the time Wanderlei Silva nearly soccer kicked Mike Van Arsdale’s head from his body. Tito Ortiz manages to air out his regrets without once mentioning Affliction or dick pics, and should be commended for his incredible ability to mentally blackout painful memories.

Join us after the jump for a collection of videos featuring the legends talking shop. We know this isn’t exactly breaking news or anything, but it’s real slow out there today, so why not take a trip down memory lane in the meantime?

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Knockout of the Day: Michael Page is Back and He Brought Another Walk-Off KO


(We know, guys, we know…)

It doesn’t really matter how we lead into this knockout video, which features Anderson Silva Jr. a.k.a Michael Page at his highlighty best during a mixed rules bout at last weekend’s UCMMA 29 card. These words are ultimately meaningless; they might as well be gobbledygook. Because this knockout, though outstanding in its own right, barely stands a chance of distracting you from the bombshell that was dropped this afternoon. To sum things up using the words of the people who occupy my Twitter feed: No UFC 151. No Christmas. God is dead. Jon Jones is an scaredy-cat, punk-bitch, fake champ. Greg Jackson is a yoda-looking, wet blanket, douchenozzle. Etc, etc…

Check it out. Or don’t. Apathy has overwhelmed me. Walla, walla, walla peas and carrots.

Video after the jump. 

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Must-See Video: Real Crime Documents Lee Murray & Britain’s Biggest Heist

It might take Real Crime’s documentary on the biggest cash heist in British history some thirty minutes to get to former UFC fighter Lee Murray, but that doesn’t make it any less entertaining. Detailing the intricate, if not mismanaged, raid of the Medway cash depot in Kent, South East England on February 22nd, 2006, Real Crime provides an enthralling look back at the whos, wheres, and hows of the meticulously planned heist unlike any other documentary in recent memory.

Managing to get interviews with everyone from Colin Dixon, the manager of the depot who was held hostage along with his family and coworkers, to Dave O’Donnell, an English fight promoter who simply cannot speak highly enough of Murray despite the evidence at hand, this documentary labels Murray “the mastermind” behind the entire escapade, which resulted in the theft of over 53 million pounds (84 million dollars). Murray and his gang utilized prosthetic masks, fake police uniforms, hidden cameras, and an arsenal of weapons that would make the cast of Predator blush to pull off their crime, only to be caught within the four months that followed it. Murray was sentenced to 10 years in Moroccan prison for his role in the heist, where he managed to pull off an even greater one: fathering a child and skipping out on the alimony payments LIKE A BOSS.

Unfortunately, the documentary fails to provide any insight regarding “Lightning’s” back alley brawl with Tito Ortiz, which is what we all really want to know about. But check out the video above, which features several highlights from Murray’s fight with Anderson Silva, and learn yourself something new. Who knows, maybe you can use this information to one day pull off an even greater robbery and actually get away with it. May the force be with you.

After the jump: A full video of Murray vs. Silva, because we’ve got to make this MMA-related somehow.

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In Case You Missed It: Ronaldo ‘Jacare’ Souza Floors Derek Brunson in 41 Seconds [VIDEO]


(Props: AllTheBestFights)

Ronaldo Souza‘s recent fights have proven that his standup skills are catching up with his tremendous ability on the mat — and his striking improvement reached an important milestone on Saturday night, when he scored the first lights-out K.O. of his nine-year fight career.

“Jacare” faced 9-1 Jackson’s MMA product Derek Brunson on the main card of Strikeforce: Rousey vs. Kaufman, and in Liddell-esque fashion, Souza found his opponent’s chin with a back-pedaling counter-right that dumped Brunson on his face. A few more follow-up shots, and it was all over. Even more impressive than Souza’s finishing power was the fact that he stopped throwing as soon as he saw that Brunson was unconscious — even if referee Mike “Stache God” Beltran clearly wanted the fight to keep going.

But Souza vs. Brunson wasn’t the only great knockout from this weekend’s Strikeforce card. After the jump: Ovince St. Preux’s one-punch shutoff of T.J. Cook.

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[VIDEO] Just TRY and Watch This UFC 151 Promo Without Blowing a Gasket

Not to come off sounding like a bunch of know-it-alls, but we’re pretty sure we’ve figured out the formula to make the perfect trailer for any upcoming UFC event. It’s simple really:

1. Pick out the best highlights of the champion destroying his former opponents, preferably in slow-mo

2. Insert Joe Rogan quote, something about said champ being “untouchable” or “the greatest”

3. Fade in “Lux Aeterna” by Clint Mansell, usually the orchestral Lord of the Rings version

4. BIG, BOLD TEXT DECLARING THAT THE CHALLENGER IS AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT BREED OF ANIMAL

5. As the song enters its second half, cut to several clips of the challenger destroying his former opponents, now in real or even sped up time.

6. Mike Goldberg yelling “Oh my” or “It is all over!”

7. Close on a dramatic, sudden cut to the event text/details.

The marketing department behind the UFC 151 promo clearly adhered to this formula, resulting in a trailer that will undoubtedly get your panties, your wife’s panties, and your slutty mistresses crotchless panties all bunched up in anticipation for the blood-soaked throwdown that will be Jones vs. Henderson on September 1st.

Check it out after the jump.

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UFC 150 Videos: The UFC 150 Danavlog & Countdown to UFC 150

Regardless of whether or not you feel Frankie Edgar truly deserved an immediate rematch with Benson Henderson after their epic clash at UFC 144, this rematch is going to happen this weekend, barring any last minute injuries, so you’ll just have to deal with it.

In all honesty, Edgar/Bendo II is perhaps the perfect main event to follow up UFC on FOX 4, as it will surely continue to deliver on the action-packed slugfests that its preceding event provided. And while we’re on the subject of UFC on FOX 4, check out a behind-the-scenes look at the event provided by the almighty Danavlog. It’s got everything: Damarques Johnson asking “What the hell happened?”, Ryan Bader asking “What the hell happened?”, and even Brandon Vera asking “What the hell happened?” Valentine McKee would’ve been proud.

So give that a gander if you would be so kind, and if you’re looking to get properly amped for this weekend’s events, down your first 5-hour energy of the day and check out the full Countdown to UFC 150 videos detailing the Bendo/Edgar, Cerrone/Guillard, and Ed Herman/Jake Shields fights after the jump.

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‘Shogun vs. Vera: Road to the Octagon’ — Full UFC on FOX 4 Preview Video


(Props: SUPAFIGHTLEAGUE)

They brought me into this fight as a fish for Shogun to eat.”

So said Brandon Vera during yesterday’s hour-long “UFC’s Road to the Octagon” special on FOX, which previewed next weekend’s UFC on FOX: Shogun vs. Vera card in Los Angeles. Vera is well aware that few people are giving him a chance in the night’s headliner — especially considering that he hasn’t had an impressive victory in over three years — but the opportunity to fight Shogun and return to elite-fighter status has given him new motivation for training.

As you can imagine, Shogun has no interest in becoming the co-star in Vera’s Cinderella story. “I’m not going to be the one to bring Brandon Vera back,” he says. And if Rua wins, he’ll likely get another shot at the light-heavyweight belt, where he’d either fight a guy who already crushed him, or a guy who beat him up for the majority of a five-round war. I know, don’t get us started.

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Pointless Beef of the Week: Rampage Jackson vs. Chael Sonnen


(Hello Quinton, Areva Mookjai here with the Thailand Lady-Boy Observer, I was just wondering if…wow, you go right after it, don’t you?)

We almost feel silly reporting on this, being that there is no way in hell this quarrel will actually be settled in the near future, but just in case you haven’t heard, Quinton Jackson and Chael Sonnen are apparently not a fan of one another, you guys. If you recall, during our thrilling interview with Page a couple of months ago, Jackson stated that he thought Sonnen was “a fool” and was tired of people asking him questions about the former middleweight title challenger on Twitter.

This is where we’d normally say something like, “Time has a way of healing all wounds,” but then of course, we wouldn’t be talking about Rampage Jackson, a man who seemingly has a gripe with everyone and everything from American fans to the UFC to driving down the correct side of a freeway. During a brief interview with MMAElite.net, Jackson aired out his dirty laundry in regards to Sonnen, claiming that he should “leave the UFC because that’s what he said he was going to do if he lost.” Also, “F*ck Chael.” While the former remark could be passed off as a simple criticism, the latter not so much:

Join us after the jump for Chael’s response, which is a doozy. 

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Vinny Magalhaes Returns to Zuffa’s Tender Embrace at UFC 151


(The super absorbent Shampow belt currently sells for $19.95, but if you call within the next ten minutes, because we can’t do this all day, we’ll throw in a baby for just the price of shipping and handling.) 

It has been a very frustrating couple of years for M-1 Light Heavyweight champion and TUF 8 finalist Vinny Magalhaes. After winning the M-1 belt with a mounted gogoplata submission over Victor Nemkov in April of 2011, then defending it with a head kick TKO of Mikhail Zayats the following October, Magalhaes found himself in a bit of contract limbo with the well documented shysters at M-1. In short, they refused to offer him any more fights under his current contract while simultaneously trying to ink him a new one. Like we said, shysters.

Anyway, after nearly a year on the shelf, Magalhaes got desperate. So desperate, in fact, that he tried selling his belt on Ebay, which was valued at an astounding $99,999 before it was suddenly pulled off the market for reasons that have yet to be explained. However, it appears that Vinny has finally reached an agreement (re: his mercifully release) with his M-1 counterparts, as word has broke that the champ, who has gone 7-1 since being ousted from the UFC following a pair of losses to Ryan Bader and Elliot Marshall, will return to the sport’s highest promotion at UFC 151, which goes down from the Mandalay Bay in Vegas on September 1st. His opponent has yet to be named, but Tatame has the scoop:

Vinny “Pezao” Magalhaes is back to the UFC. The light heavyweight, who lost to Ryan Bader on the TUF 8 Finale, signed a contract with the organization and is set to fight at UFC 151, on September 1st, TATAME learned with sources.

Videos of Magalhaes’ title win and defense await you after the jump, along with the skinny on a potential signing in the UFC’s flyweight division.

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