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21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

Tag: MMA

Gina Carano Getting Her Own Round 5 Figure


(An excuse to post this picture again?  Why not.)

Round 5 sent out a press release today announcing Gina Carano as the newest addition to their stable of fighters willing to be made into disproportionate MMA action figures.  Carano is the first female fighter to sign on with Round 5, and they expect her figure to drop along with their fourth series this summer.

In the release Carano says the normal stuff about how excited she is to be a part of this, so on and so forth, and then there’s this: “When I was a little girl my dad always joked about making a ‘Gina doll’ and I smile when I think it has become a reality.”  

He joked about making a doll of his daughter?  As in, for her?  Or just, you know, to have around the house, in case anything happened to the original?  I don’t get it, but I find it vaguely troubling.

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UFC Signs Yoshihiro Akiyama

 
Yoshihiro Akiyama vs. Denis Kang – Watch more free videos
(Akiyama putting a hurting on Denis Kang, back when that meant a little more.)

UFC.com announced this afternoon that Yoshihiro Akiyama has signed on with the UFC.  There’s no word on who his first opponent will be, but he’s expected to step into the Octagon for the first time this summer.  

This is a big move for the UFC because it not only bolsters their middleweight roster, but also helps Dana White’s eventual plan to take his business to Japan.  Akiyama is the kind of fighter many Japanese fans (and Shinya Aoki) love to hate, partly because he is ethnically Korean and has been involved in one or two greasing scandals of his own.  As the UFC gets more top Japanese fighters on its roster, especially ones the Japanese fans will pay to see in spite of themselves, it’s going to make things much easier when the UFC finally manages to schedule an event over there.  

As Dana White is quoted as saying in the UFC.com story:

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UFC 95′s Best Photos

Props to MMA Weekly, UFC.com, The Sun, and the “UFC 95: The Aftermath” set on Combat Lifestyle.                       

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Muhammed Lawal Might Have the Best MySpace Page Ever

Muhammed Kingo Mo Lawal MMA Sengoku Fuck Yall tattoo
Muhammed King Mo Lawal MMA Myspace Sengoku
(Images courtesy of MoSpace)

So, Maggie from Cage Writer came across the top photo of Muhammed "King Mo" Lawal‘s amazing new tattoo, which she found on his MySpace page. A cursory visit to that page reveals a nearly non-stop cavalcade of awesomeness — honestly, such a welcome and uplifting change of pace from the reliable sadness of myspace.com/warmachine170nhb. I mean, just look at Lawal’s "About Me" essay:

I’m on a mission that can’t be stopped. I’m Gettin Dat Paper!!! If you dont know what GDP stand for, ask King Bunch The Great*. Thats what my Squad, GDP/GHP, is all about….And King Bunch The Great’s Squad Team Thirsty…GPD is 4ever….
 
I’m livin to die and I’m dyin to live….. I’ve lived all over from Tennessee, Kentucky, Oklahoma, Texas, Colorado, and now California.** At the moment, I’m currently living in Temecula, California and I’m training to be be An MMA Legend.
 
A new chapter in my life has begun…If you down for the ride…Holla at me… The last 10 years of my life have been filled with many ups, many downs, and plenty sacrifice. People came and People went. Many Loved and More Hated. The path that I chose molded me into the MAN I now am. Say!!! Thanx to all the people that supported me and stood by a nigga. And an extra thanx to all those that wanna see me FAIL and wanna see me FALL…I love yall the most…Ima thank myself too…cuz I gotta eat first….  
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The Only Rule You’ll Ever Need to Determine Whether a Fight Was Stopped Too Early


(Props: Smoogy on the UG)

Josh Koscheck’s TKO loss has been the subject of a lot of debate on the old internets for the past couple of days.  Some people think the stoppage was too fast, not giving Koscheck the chance to recover and defend himself.  One of those people, obviously, is Koscheck himself (side note: man, give that camera man credit for going into a tense locker room, hearing that rant, and then having the balls to ask, very simply, “Do you think he should have stopped it?”), but the fact is he’s wrong, and so is everyone arguing his side in this case.

Here’s how you know your fight was stopped early: you can immediately look into the ref’s face as he moves in to stop the bout and say, ‘What the fuck is your problem?’  If you can do that, preferably without slurring or attempting to rise and then falling back down, then you have a legitimate gripe.  I like to call this the ‘What the fuck is your problem?’ rule.  

If you can’t say ‘What the fuck is your problem?’ (other acceptable variations include: ‘What the fuck are you doing?’, ‘That’s fucking bullshit!’, and ‘Mazzagatti, you asshole!’) immediately after the stoppage, then the ref had reason enough to stop the fight.  

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Gomi Is Depressed


(Sometimes you have only one friend, and he’s somewhere at the bottom of that next mug of beer.)

In a recent interview with Sportsnavi (via Suki) Takanori Gomi talks about his fall from the top of the lightweight division and his loss to Satoru Kitaoka (video here, and it doesn’t take long) in the Sengoku lightweight Grand Prix.  Give him credit for owning up to his poor performance, as Gomi more or less says that he has sucked lately and doesn’t seem entirely hopeful that things will get better.

As you saw, I couldn’t do anything. I suppose fans who knew me since PRIDE considered that I looked like a totally different person. I don’t even know why. I didn’t feel any energy in the ring. After the fight, I felt like I was free. I thought I fulfilled my duty.
- Do you mean that you resigned from a representer of the top lightweight fighter?
I suppose so. I hadn’t proven myself in the last few fights. I was training, yet everything was fall in apart. I couldn’t put together because my training wasn’t enough. My skills went down in the last 2 years. I experienced a lot in the last 2 years. I quit Kiguchi dojo without thinking well, and started my gym. I felt responsibility to take care of my students, and I was passive about my fight. I was just waiting and see who I fought with.
- The title of the tournament was “road to Gomi”
I have no excuse about my performance and my loss. Kitaoka was entirely better than me. I I hope he becomes a great champion and defends his title.
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Penn Won’t Be Ready for Florian Until Late Summer

BJ Penn training MMA UFC

According to a new report on Sherdog, BJ Penn won’t be available for a lightweight title defense against Kenny Florian until late July or August, because he wants to spend time with his new daughter. Though Dana White — and BJ Penn’s facebook page — previously stated that the Penn/Florian tilt was a possibility to headline UFC 99 (June 13th; Cologne, Germany), it’s looking like the match could headline the as-of-yet unannounced UFC 101 or 102 cards.

If Penn does agree to a fight in late July, it will have been 14 months since the last time the UFC’s lightweight title was up for grabs — and eight months since Kenny Florian last stepped into the Octagon. It’s a long layoff, but whaddya gonna do:

“For me, it’s the fight that I want and it’s the fight he wants and we both need to come to terms on it, so if that’s what I need to do to make it happen, if I have to wait, then I have no choice,” [Florian] said.
 
Florian, 32, said he could adjust his training as needed. Still, a postponed date would effect the Boston native in a way the affluent Penn family never has to worry about.
 
“Schedule-wise it makes it a little difficult because money-wise, you expect a certain amount to come in and I’ve been trying to budget things accordingly,” said Florian, who earned $80,000 for his last win. “It might be a little tougher now.”

It’s a bummer, but waiting for your title shot is still a better option than taking a placeholder bout just to stay busy, and running the risk of getting Paulo Thiago‘d.

Semi-Related: Even if Penn is ready to fight by early July, the lineup for the UFC’s monumental 100th (-ish) event (July 11th, Las Vegas) might already be too crowded. In addition to the GSP/Alves and Henderson/Bisping fights, the rumor of a Randy Couture vs. Fedor Emelianenko one-off match has reared its head again, thanks to UFC-approved journalist Kevin Iole.

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Must-See: Drew Fickett Goes Before Judge Judy

Major props to CagePotato reader "Soorma" for passing along this circa-2001 clip of MMA crazyperson Drew Fickett getting called before the most testicle-crushing judge on television for a little misunderstanding involving golf balls being hit off the top of a car. Drew’s airtight defense? Like all women, the plaintiff is simply infatuated with him. It seems that the conflict started when, at a graduation party for a University of Arizona student, Drew just had to be that asshole who showed up in an Arizona State hat. (Wow, can Judy hand out the death penalty in situations like this?) FYI, everything after the 6:06 mark is unrelated junk, and part 2 is unembeddable for some reason, but you can check out the conclusion here. Basically, Drew’s cute girlfriend shows up as a character witness, Fickett loses the case — based on a single unreliable eyewitness, but whatever — and the U of A brats lift their noses at ASU. ("We don’t associate with people like him…everyone I talk to says he’s psycho.") THIS IS JUSTICE?

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Dan Hardy Knows What He’s Doing


(Steve Cofield chats with Dan Hardy after UFC 95.)

By know you may have heard that Dan Hardy is following up on his big knockout victory over Rory Markham at UFC 95 by immediately angling for a fight with Marcus Davis.  He’s already taken some shots at Davis’ attempts to brand himself as a U.K. fan favorite, telling Sherdog.com that “The Irish Hand Grenade” is “not English; he’s not Irish. I was born here, and I’ve been bred here. I don’t mind taking on that challenge and showing him this is my home and not his.”

Boom.  Immediately this fight has a hook.  Not only does Hardy have a point – for all Davis’ attempts to sell us on his Irish heritage, the thick New England accent limits our suspension of disbelief, kilt or no – but he’s also taking a proactive role in his own matchmaking, which is a very smart move for a guy in his situation.

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Bid on Gina Carano’s Bra, Become Officially Creepy


(Awww, that’s disturbing.)

Are you a huge Gina Carano fan looking for the perfect piece of memorabilia to let everyone know that your fascination with her has gone from strange to unsettling?  Then this is your lucky day.  Out friends at Fightlinker found someone on Ebay who is selling an autographed Gina Carano sports bra.  We don’t know what search the Fightlinker boys were doing when they stumbled upon this, but we can probably go ahead and assume it was weird.

This guy, however, takes weird to a whole new level.  He claims he got Gina to sign this at Xtreme Couture, and then he went and had it framed.  Which is, you know, what you do with ladies undergarments that have become collector’s items.  Now he’s giving you the chance to bid on it, starting at just $99.99 (plus shipping and handling).

Think of all the things you could do with it.  You could put it on your wall to scare off dates that you bring home.  You could lay it out on your bed and lie down next to it at night.  You could even give it as an entirely inappropriate gift to your girlfriend!  The possibilities are endless…

Sort of Related:
Pieces of Rampage’s Tire For Sale

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