(Photo courtesy of Si.com)

Now that this crazy weekend of MMA action is in the books, it’s time to sort through the rubble of UFC 91 and figure out who’s up and who’s down. And how will we do that? Arbitrary numbers, baby. It’s the only way.

Brock Lesnar +482

The line of reasoning that says he’s too inexperienced to be deserving of a title shot simply doesn’t hold up after he wins by second-round stoppage. Even if you don’t think he beat the best Couture we’ve ever seen in the Octagon, he still looked positively terrifying in there. This guy can give lots of heavyweights lots of problems, particularly if he continues to improve. And if you’re one of the millions who hate him, well, you’re just playing right into his enormous hands.

Randy Couture -130

Maybe it was age that was Couture’s undoing. Maybe it was size and strength. Regardless, it’s hard to see how he will ever capture another UFC title. A fight against the loser of the Nogueira-Mir match would still be compelling, but time is running out. And fast.

Kenny Florian +274

He dismantled Joe Stevenson much the same way B.J. Penn did, if not more impressively. So why doesn’t Penn seem at all interested in fighting him? Whatever happens in Penn’s superfight with GSP, no lightweight has earned a title shot more than KenFlo and waited so long and so patiently for it. Come on, B.J. Let’s do eet!

(“It was a big, white, semi-truck. The license plate was JACKLINKS.”)

“The ref [Mario Yamasaki] was going, ‘Eh, is [Couture] OK?’ Mario was trying to give him time [to recover]. There’s a fine line between that and [allowing] too many punches. When I saw Randy go back down, I thought we had crossed that line.” — Dana White on the stoppage in UFC 91′s Lesnar/Couture fight, which some questioned as dangerously late.

“He came in a couple days ago and I introduced him to Manny and the other trainers. We picked out a time…and he’s gonna come in and start training with me. I hear he’s a great striker and I hope we can help him improve even more.” — Beloved boxing trainer Freddie Roach on his new protege, Anderson Silva.

“I’d fight him. The thing about a Machida fight that isn’t appealing to me is that stylistically, Machida is kind of a boring fighter. That’s not a putdown. He’s very, very effective. He’s good at what he does. He’s constantly backing away and forces his opponent into mistakes, and that’s how he catches you. In order to beat him, you really have to fight an intelligent fight, and I think that by not overcommitting yourself on things, it’s going to create a situation where you’re not putting on a fight that’s really exciting for the fans.” — Rich Franklin stating the obvious regarding a potential rematch with Lyoto Machida. Machida gave Franklin his first career loss via TKO at the Inoki Bom-Ba-Ye Festival in 2003.

(“Fruit smoothies are on me tonight, buddy!”)

The UFC paid out a juicy $1,358,000 in disclosed salaries and bonuses for UFC 91, with the night’s headliners walking away with over half of that total. The numbers are below; keep in mind that they don’t include income from sponsorships, undisclosed “locker room bonuses” or pay-per-view percentages, or deductions due to expenses such as insurance and taxes. And here we go…

Brock Lesnar: $450,000 (includes $200,000 win bonus)
Randy Couture: $250,000
Gabriel Gonzaga: $110,000 (includes $55,000 win bonus)
Dustin Hazelett: $88,000 (includes $14,000 win bonus, $60,000 Submission of the Night bonus)
Kenny Florian: $80,000 (includes $40,000 win bonus)
Jeremy Stephens: $76,000 (includes $8,000 win bonus, $60,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
Jorge Gurgel: $70,000 (includes $60,000 Fight of the Night Bonus)
Aaron Riley: $68,000 (includes $4,000 win bonus, $60,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
Demian Maia: $40,000 (includes $20,000 win bonus)

(Lesnar: title belt, stitches, and all. Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Dana White and the cast of fighters from UFC 91 were surprisingly forthcoming at the post-fight press conference on Saturday night, with one exception. Near the end of the Q & A session, a reporter asked Brock Lesnar what the essential differences were between being a UFC employee and a WWE one, from a business standpoint.

“Don’t answer that question,” White said to his new heavyweight champ, only half-jokingly. Lesnar said he wouldn’t. It got a laugh. Seems like these two are going to get along just fine. When someone brought up the possible Kimbo Slice-Brock Lesnar comparison, based more on the number of pro fights each man had than the quality, White was quick to shoot it down.

“It drove me crazy when people would compare him to Kimbo Slice. If I had hair I’d pull it out. He’s far from Kimbo Slice.”

“I don’t even know that guy,” said Lesnar, who had already claimed not to “have the internet” or even read newspapers when asked if he was discouraged by critics in the press. “Who is he?”

“You’re lucky,” said White.

Props to MMAScraps. Get it while it lasts…

(You ready for this? Photo courtesy of MMA Weekly.)

We are live at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas for an extra-special, on-the-scene liveblog of UFC 91. What does that mean for your life? It means preliminary results, witty observations about crowd members, and constant updates as to what Arianny Celeste is up to throughout the night. At the same time, I don’t want to miss out on all your hilarious quips about the live broadcast, including but not limited to the banter between Joe Rogan and the century man, Mike Goldberg, so please fill me in with your comments.

Liveblog begins after the jump. Hit refresh often. If you don’t want the prelims spoiled for you…too bad. Just suck it up and deal.

(He kids because he loves.)

Chael Sonnen not only has a prediction for the main event of tonight’s UFC 91 (which we’ll be liveblogging, just a reminder), he’s also willing to put a little something behind it:

I’ll bet 25 percent of Paulo [Filho]’s purse on “The Natural.”

Someone get Filho some salve. Because he’s just been burned.

Check out MMA Live pretending to be College Gameday here as they preview the Randy Couture-Brock Lesnar bout. They may be missing the drunk, screaming, college students in the background, but they’ve got the headsets, dammit.

It’s great to see ESPN getting more serious about their MMA coverage. And since I am also in Vegas for the event, and since I want to help them out, I will now paint a Brock Lesnar penis sword on my chest and go down to scream in Franklin McNeil’s ear as a show of support. Also I will be drunk.

After the jump, the crew looks at Kenny Florian-Joe Stevenson, as well as the rest of the televised undercard.

(Props: YouTube.com/UFC)

The unholy union between the UFC and 50 Cent has spawned its first offspring — this promo video for tomorrow night’s Couture vs. Lesnar fight, soundtracked by Fiddy’s new single “Get Up.” I don’t know…in the words of Randy Jackson, this one’s just aight for me, dog.

MMA Rated brings us this video from yesterday’s UFC 91 press conference, in which Dana White announces that the winner of the Kenny Florian/Joe Stevenson fight will earn a shot at BJ Penn’s lightweight title. Florian, Stevenson, Brock Lesnar, and Randy Couture also take the podium to say a few words. Fun fact: 15 of Randy’s 18 UFC fights have been for a championship belt.

After the jump: something completely different…

(Randy refuses to look Brock in the eyes! BET LESNAR! BET LESNAR! Photo courtesy of Flex Magazine.)

The UFC’s heavyweight grand prix, pay-per-view buys, Tamdan McCrory’s AFC status — we discuss it all in the latest installment of Ben vs. Ben. FYI, Fowlkes is currently a -170 favorite to win this argument.

How exactly will the main event end, and how will the winner fare in the heavyweight “tournament” as a whole?

Fowlkes: As big and powerful as Brock Lesnar is, his chances to win this fight diminish the longer it goes. He has the classic wrestler-turned-MMA fighter problem. He can get a guy down and hold him there, but aside from some inefficient ground-and-pound, he struggles to put people away.

So you’re all impressed by Lesnar’s win over Heath Herring? Great. You know who else outwrestled Herring for a decision win? Jake O’Brien. My point is, it’s not such an impossible feat. He’s never gone five rounds with someone as savvy and resilient as Couture. While Lesnar’s best hope is a decision, Couture can win several different ways.

Couture might have to take a beating in the first couple rounds. He might get pushed around more than he’s used to. But by the third he’ll turn the tide. He’ll take Lesnar’s back, discover that the man has no discernible neck to choke, then unleash a torrent of punches and satisfy himself with a TKO finish due to ref stoppage at the 4:10 mark. And still…UFC…heavyweight champion…until he’s submitted by Nogueira in the finals of this so-called tournament.

Goldstein: I say Couture takes the UFC 91 main event in a unanimous decision. We’re going to see a very methodical Randy on Saturday night, working his clinch game when he can, and doing his best to stuff takedown attempts and keep out of Brock’s punching range. He’ll go with the low-risk Machida approach, in other words, because one mistake, leading to one unfortunate position, could bring about a painful loss. I’ll agree that Randy will have Brock figured out by round three, but I’m going to give Lesnar the benefit of the doubt and say that Randy won’t be able to finish him — though Lesnar will definitely take more abuse than he ever has in his short real-fighting career.

(Odds on that dog doing something adorable: very, very good.)

Though we’ve debated the topic nearly to death over the last few days, there’s still no online betting establishment giving odds on whether UFC 91 will really sell 1.2 million pay-per-views, as Dana White claims. What a shame. Knowing absolutely nothing about oddsmaking and even less about basic math, I’d put the line at +900. For all you ‘tards out there, that means I don’t think it will happen. The line on us seeing both Mandy Moore and Laura Prepon during the broadcast? -230. The line on the two of them fighting it out over the last Cosmo at the after-party? +15000. That’s not because they wouldn’t do it, but because the Cosmos never run dry when you hang with Dana White. Never.

As for the odds on actual fights that will actually happen, BestFightOdds.com has done all the leg work for us, and here are the best lines for UFC 91:

Brock Lesnar (-121) vs. Randy Couture (+111)
Kenny Florian (-174) vs. Joe Stevenson (+164)
Demian Maia (-200) vs. Nate Quarry (+195)
Dustin Hazelett (-150) vs. Tamdan McCrory (+175)
Gabriel Gonzaga (-370) vs. Josh Hendricks (+371)
Mark Bocek (-105) vs. Alvin Robinson (+110)
Jeremy Stephens (-115) vs. Rafael Dos Anjos (+117)
Jorge Gurgel (-115) vs. Aaron Riley (+126)
Matt Brown (-185) vs. Ryan Thomas (+190)

Thoughts…

(Nothing says ‘power couple’ like matching shirts and leis.)

Affliction’s Todd Beard really knows how to screw up. First he goes on Scott Ferrall’s radio show to blast Randy Couture and publicly state his desire to see him get his ass kicked by Brock Lesnar. But that’s not enough to really alienate one of the biggest stars Affliction works with, so just for good measure he also threatens Couture’s wife, Kim, who then gets a restraining order against him. That’s called going above and beyond, working fuck-up overtime. And here we thought he was just an alcoholic.

TMZ has the scoop:

Randy and wife Kim claim Affliction Prez Todd Beard has been on a campaign of terror against them since they asked for an accounting of profits. A Las Vegas judge just issued a temporary restraining order, prohibiting Beard from going near Kim, and that includes going near the MGM Grand when Randy fights this Saturday. And Beard can’t go to the hotel during the weigh-in the day before either.

According to Kim Couture’s declaration, Beard has made “a series of threats and acts intended to intimidate me and otherwise coerce me to ‘back off.’”

She goes on: “My fear of Mr. Beard is well-founded given his extensive criminal history. Not only has he been convicted of numerous state and federal felonies relating to fraud …he has engaged in numerous acts of violence, including violence against women.”

Hold up, “extensive criminal history?” You mean, aside from making those overpriced t-shirts? Yes. As it turns out, Beard is a bit of a rounder. He’s even served time.

(Taking a breather, messing with a footlock. No biggie.)

It’s that time again. Volume two in our “Ask the Potato” series. So, for those of you who asked whether this was an ongoing series, consider your question answered. Try to come up with something a little more thought-provoking next time. Go here if you’ve got a question that just can’t wait.

When are we going to find out about Paulo Filho‘s toxicology report, and how soon do you see the California Kid getting his rematch? Is he going to have to climb the ladder, or would the rematch be immediate? — Faderade

I once drove a forklift on the loading docks of a small, non-union trucking company. Many idiots worked there. One day one of these idiots inexplicably drove his forklift directly into a stack of riding lawnmowers, causing several thousand dollars worth of damage. They drug-tested that guy the same day. He did not pass. For some odd reason, Filho’s performance at WEC 36 reminded me of that guy.

When I picture the urine sample Filho submitted to the Florida Commission, I imagine it smoking and bubbling like the secret potion in a monster movie. Just handling the sample could probably cause a woman to miscarry, even if she wasn’t pregnant.

But that’s just speculation on my part. Maybe Filho wasn’t on drugs. Maybe he was off them, and that’s the explanation. You can usually expect to find out if someone tested positive within a month of the event. We’re waiting. Anxiously. As for Urijah Faber, he’ll get that rematch just as soon as Brown is healthy. He’s earned it, and it’s the only fight for the WEC at 145 that’s a guaranteed draw at this point.

What does it mean if Brock Lesnar wins? — Maxwell

In this edition of Dana White‘s video blog he prepares for UFC 91 by going to the THQ headquarters to get a look at the upcoming “UFC 2009: Undisputed” video game. Does it look totally sweet? It does. The designers attempt to explain some of their revolutionary methods in creating this game, but Dana doesn’t care. He just wants to play as Brock Lesnar. And if you’re going to try and tell me that the THQ dudes didn’t let him win, don’t bother.

This video blog also has the strangest ending we’ve seen yet. After Dana gets done swearing his way through an interview with the Wall Street Journal, he responds to a critic on YouTube who wondered why a rich guy like the UFC prez would listen to music on regular earphones like the rest of us plebes. Well, problem solved, because now he’s got the Dr. Dre Beats headphones, bitch! You happy now?! Well, probably not, no.

Seriously, is Dana White going through and reading the YouTube comments on his video blogs? Because that is not the best use of his time.

(If Dana is right, Jack Link’s Beef Jerky is about to get their money’s worth.)

UFC president Dana White appeared on ESPN First Take today (thanks to our friends at MMA Fanhouse for the heads up) to talk UFC 91, and it seems he isn’t backing down from his earlier prediction that this event would do over a million pay-per-view buys. This time White got even more specific with his figures:

“We think it’s going to be the biggest pay-per-view draw in UFC history,” White said. “We think we’re going to do 1.2 million buys on this fight. It’s a big fight, the WWE cross-over for this fight, a lot of WWE fans are going to tune in to see if their former wrestling champion can win in a real fight. Vince McMahon might even buy this fight.”

One hopes that White is relying on some kind of consumer research, as he has claimed in the past, and not just spouting off a number. But 1.2 million buys, in the midst of a recession? That’s the kind of claim that makes me want to call ‘shenanigans,’ as the kids say.

The shakiest part of this logic is the dependence on the curiosity of the WWE crossover audience, especially the portion of that audience that typically passes on buying UFC events. This is Brock Lesnar‘s third UFC fight. Granted, it’s his biggest one yet, but only fans who follow the UFC enough to realize the importance of Randy Couture appreciate that.

To the casual WWE fan that White is depending on, isn’t this just another Brock Lesnar fight? And if these WWE fans are so eager to see Lesnar in a real fight, wouldn’t they have been just as willing to pay for his first big fight against Frank Mir?

Ryan Couture vs. Ricky Perez – Watch more Free Videos

Randy Couture‘s son, Ryan, was successful in his amateur debut this past weekend, submitting Ricky Perez in the first round. The reaction from Ryan’s friends in the crowd is, let’s just say, enthusiastic.

I always have mixed feelings watching the children of famous people attempt to do what their famous parents do. On one hand, Couture’s son probably has great genetics and excellent training to help him along. On the other, he’s always going to be known as Randy Couture’s son.

Just think about what he’d have to do in order to get out from under that cloud as an MMA fighter. If he became the greatest fighter in the history of the sport, if he defeated the children of Fedor Emelianenko and Chuck Liddell on the same night and then beat up Tito Ortiz and Jenna Jameson‘s love child on his way back to the locker room (naturally I assume that the Ortiz/Jameson offspring will be a screaming drunk in the audience) that might do it.

Who knows, sometimes the child eclipses the father, and that is one hell of a triangle choke. But for every Peyton Manning there’s a Gloria Hemingway. Best of luck in avoiding that fate, little Couture.

(Props: MMA Rated)

“Countdown to UFC 91″ airs tonight on Spike TV at 11 pm EST/PST. In this brief taste we get an idea of what the storyline between Randy Couture and Brock Lesnar is going to be, but somehow it still feels like less than an all-out promotional blitz for an event Dana White predicted would top one million pay-per-view buys. Maybe they think this one sells itself. Maybe they think the wrestling fans will come out in droves to buy this one like they never have before. Maybe they finally realized that the undercard is caught somewhere between mediocre and painfully weak, and they’re already thinking about hyping UFC 92.

After the jump, Matt Lindland stops by to give his analysis of the Couture-Lesnar matchup.

(Brock Lesnar will get his gross sweat all over you. Look out, Randy.)

Brock Lesnar is preparing for Randy Couture with his jiu-jitsu coach Rodrigo “Comprido” Medeiros, who as you might recall was the man to help Lesnar figure out the mystery of the kneebar after his loss to Frank Mir. Comprido tells Graciemag.com that Lesnar is training at a new academy, mixing it up with world class submissions guys like himself and decorated wrestlers like Cole Konrad. As for a prediction, Comprido isn’t shy:

“I know Couture is a very strategic fighter, but I believe Brock will take this fight in the first round.”

Somehow Frank Mir is unmoved by this endorsement, claiming that he’d still rather rematch Lesnar than take on Couture in the finals of this so-called heavyweight “tournament”:

(GSP is not impressed. Props: MMA Mania.)

- Is Shonie Carter trapped in a foreign land? (Fightlinker)

- Talking WEC meltdown, Pro Elite antics, and more on internet radio. (MMA Rated)

- Matt Hughes is not a white supremacist. (Bloody Elbow)

- Randy Couture scoffs at your insults. (Las Vegas Sun)

- Gina Carano and “Cyborg” Santos to sign together as package deal? (Fighters Only)

- Gomi reloading to headline Sengoku 7. (MMA Junkie)

- Mike Massenzio looking to use CB Dollaway as a stepping stone. (Fight Hype)

- The 10 best bourbons you’ve never heard of. (Holy Taco)

- How the iPhone beat the Blackberry. (Wall Street Fighter)

- Milla Jovovich to play alcoholic stripper…finally. (Screen Junkies)

- Dry ice bomb owns dad. (Nothing Toxic)

ESPN’s MMA Live talks UFC 91 (which they’ll be broadcasting from live, with three shows next week) among other recent topics in the world of mixed martial arts. As much as I enjoy this show, Stephan Bonnar looks so uncomfortable. At times he seems like a robot that has learned about human emotions and expression solely by watching daytime TV. If bringing him in was a ploy to make us miss Kenny Florian while he’s locked away in a gym somewhere, mission accomplished.

After the jump, something that is not MMA but is still both fighting-related and awesome.

In this video interview from Steve Cofield, Randy Couture responds to the recent hostility directed at him by Affliction co-owner Todd Beard. It seems that Randy isn’t above slinging a little mud right back — and he gets pretty damn personal:

“I don’t intend to do any more business with Todd or Affliction in any way, and whether or not they still manufacture [Xtreme Couture clothing] down the road or not is still yet to be seen. But, you know, guys with drinking problems, I mean, is what it boils down to. I’ve seen it at several different professional meetings where he’s ordering shots and just out of control. And it’s not really something that I want be associated with.”

OH, SNAP. Beard sounds almost as bad as Mauro Ranallo. The UFC still won’t allow Randy to wear Xtreme Couture gear during UFC appearances as long as Affliction is a competitor, and his return to the Octagon has Beard’s panties in a twist — so basically, Affliction’s attempt to be a fight promoter may wind up spiking Couture’s clothing line altogether. I ask you: Hasn’t his man suffered enough?

In other Couture news, Randy’s son Ryan will make his amateur MMA debut tonight at the Bellingham Sportsplex in Bellingham, Washington. He’ll be facing Ricky Perez (1-1) in the 160-pound division. Let’s hope he fares a little better than his stepmom.

MMA Scraps dug up the above video of Randy Couture‘s first-ever UFC fight, which took place at UFC 13 (5/30/97; Augusta, Georgia) against Tony “The Viking” Halme, a former pro-wrestler who made a completely unsuccessful run at being a mixed martial artist. This was Halme’s fourth and final pro MMA fight after three losing appearances in Rings. After Couture made short work of Halme, he went on to score a TKO over Steven Graham the same night, winning the event’s heavyweight bracket.

Below: I don’t want to call BJ Penn a bitch, because clearly he isn’t — I mean, his record speaks for itself. I’m just saying that the sounds he makes while putting up 150 pounds in the gym are somewhat bitch-like. He’s like the Maria Sharapova of free-weights. But I do like the GSP-directed dig his wrestling coach gets in at the end: “You don’t have Hollywood agents reprensentin’ ya, man. We’re just normal guys that like to beat somebody up.” Bonus: Our pal Dewey at Yardbarker filmed a ten-part MMA tutorial video series with cage-legend Frank Shamrock. Part 8 (“Leg Locks 101″) is after the jump; the rest can be seen here.

(In Brock’s defense, he is really, really white.)

We all know why Brock Lesnar deals with accusations and insinuations about steroid use. It’s because he’s a white dude. Right? Simply couldn’t be any other explanation. At least that’s what he told Pro MMA Radio:

“I’ve been accused of using steroids my entire life, probably since the tenth grade in high school… I’ve never failed a drug test. Now if I was a black guy and I looked the way I do would I get asked this question a 100 times? I just happen to be a white guy that has some great genetics, so I guess that puts a bullseye on me… I’m a white dude that’s shredded and you don’t see a lot of it — a guy that’s walking around that looks like me.”

I feel silly even typing this, but I think Brock Lesnar is oversimplifying this issue. I kind of see his point. Almost. But in answer to his question, if he was a 280-pound black man who was a former pro wrestler and who looked like an action figure, I tend to think that he would still get roughly the same amount of steroid questions. Does the name Bob Sapp sound familiar?

If Brock is tired of being asked about steroids, I have bad news for him. Unless he suddenly starts to resemble a normal human being it isn’t likely to stop. Perhaps his piles of money will console him.

(Props: MMA Mania)

(Props: MMA Rated)

In this video Carlos Arias of the OC Register manages to get former EliteXC VP Gary Shaw talking about the company’s collapse. Shaw says he is “not ashamed” of what he did in his time with EliteXC, and bemoans the “haters” who have been taking shots at he and his son. Speaking of his son, now that EliteXC is done and $kala has lost whatever vague job he held with them, this means he’s out of the MMA biz for good, right? Oh, if only it were that easy.

Says Gary:

“We really truly haven’t spoken about what career path he wants to do. I know he truly loves MMA, so there’s a chance that he’ll want to stay in it. …If it wasn’t for Jared I wouldn’t have gotten into MMA.”

Is that statement supposed to somehow make us hate him less?

After the jump, a special message from Randy Couture.

In the latest episode of Inside MMA, the gang discusses UFC 91 with Randy Couture. Based on his comments here, as well as the video of his training, Couture seems to think all there is to beating Lesnar is getting used to dealing with a big, heavy guy. Maybe he’s right. Then again, maybe the reason there’s only one Brock Lesnar is because few human beings are that big and also that athletic. I suppose we’ll find out.

Couture (along with TapouT’s Mask and the UFC’s Mike Swick) also discuss the Fedor Emelianenko-Andrei Arlovski bout, as well as the prospects of Couture-Fedor. They aren’t good, in case you’re wondering.

Randy Couture Trains for Brock Lesnar – Watch more free videos

In preparation for his bout with Brock Lesnar at UFC 91 on Nov. 15, Randy Couture is doing just about the only thing you can: tussling with big wrestler-types. He looks to be handling them pretty well in this video. Then again, none of these dudes is Brock Lesnar. Just saying.

Below, Chael Sonnen absolutely refuses to complain about his somewhat controversial loss to Paulo Filho and talks about his plan for this Wednesday’s WEC rematch.

Chael Sonnen Talks Paulo Filho Rematch – Watch more free videos

(‘That was…fun?’)

Kim Couture is set to get back in MMA action for the first time since having her jaw jacked in her pro debut against Kim Rose back in June, only this time she’ll be fighting in a real organization. Strikeforce sent out a press release to announce that “Sugar Free” would be competing on their Nov. 21 “Destruction” card in San Jose, Calif.

The wife of UFC heavyweight champ Randy Couture has tried her hand at just about every aspect of MMA except ring girl at this point, even messing around with management and promoting, with mixed results. Now she takes on Lina Kvokov, and she’s hoping for a better, or at least less grisly outcome this time around:

“Losing that fight was the best thing that ever happened to me,” said Couture who, despite sustaining considerable punishment, went the three round distance with Rose before losing a unanimous judges’ decision. “It’s completely changed me as a fighter. I’ve started doing things a lot different. It made me realize that I have to be the aggressor or I’m going to get hurt.”

Hurt, indeed. The more interesting (or perhaps only interesting) aspect of this news is it signals Strikeforce’s willingness to wade deeper into the waters of women’s MMA. With Gina Carano destined to eventually hit the free agent market and the UFC ruling out the idea of a women’s division at the moment, the opportunity exists for someone to step in and fill that void. Strikeforce could well be that someone.

Slightly related: Kim Couture and Gina Carano Grappling (video), Kim Couture surprised at UFC’s disregard for Brock Lesnar’s safety

(Props: MMA Scraps)

Joe Rogan and Dana White mark out hard about Brock Lesnar’s athleticism and Randy Couture’s unquantifiable champion essence in this in-depth look at UFC 91′s marquee matchup. One of the talking points is that Lesnar’s strength and wrestling ability will negate Couture’s natural advantages — though that could easily work the other way. As of now, Couture is a very slight betting underdog against Lesnar. Betting against him, historically speaking, is not a great idea.

Below: Tracy Morgan actually name-checked Kimbo Slice on Late Night With Conan O’Brien last night. Conan had no idea who he was referring to, and Morgan explained that they’re actually related. Who knew? After the jump: “The Passion.”

(Props: BloodyElbow)

(When you’re a jerk to the guy with the cute puppy, you always come out looking like the bad guy.)

You’d think Affliction wouldn’t take Randy Couture‘s return to the UFC personally. For one, they never signed him. For another, it had gotten to the point where it looked like Couture’s choices were between making up with Dana White or spending what little remains of his fighting shelf life in legal battles. But apparently there are those in Affliction, namely co-owner Todd Beard, who are pretty pissed off about the whole scenario.

Appearing on the Scott Ferrall radio show (you remember him, the “crackhead-looking motherfucker” Dana White used to pay to cover UFC events?) Beard reportedly said, “Randy, if you’re listening right now, I hope (expletive) Lesnar kills you.”

Which seems, you know, uncalled for. Even Couture can’t make much sense of the outburst:

“I really don’t understand where Todd Beard’s coming from in his attack to me, my wife, and my attorney, and now the Ferttitas and Lorenzo specifically, and Dana White. I don’t understand it,” stated Couture. “He feels there’s this adversarial relationship created and I just don’t get it. It’s gone beyond kind of the antics of being a promoter, so we’ll see how all that unfolds, and where the relationship stands, and where we end up with that down the road.”

So Affliction really wants Couture to rep them with his Xtreme Couture gear, so much so that they had talks with the UFC about it, which also ended with Todd Beard swearing at someone, but antics like this certainly aren’t helping things. Looks like Affliction needs to get their boy under control, or we may have seen the last of Couture sporting the skulls and chains.

(Does that look infected to you? Photo courtesy of myspace.com/allen_browning)

Following in the footsteps of fighters like Mac Danzig and Amir Sadollah, Junie Browning is the latest Ultimate Fighter notable to re-focus his training at Xtreme Couture in Las Vegas. MMA Weekly has confirmed that Browning started training with the camp about a week and a half ago, and so far he hasn’t tried to throw training equipment into the hot tub or jump off the roof:

“He’s been very quiet in the gym, there’s been no antics, there’s been no nothing,” [Randy] Couture said. “He shows up everyday and straps his gloves on and gets his work done.”

In other words, he’s functioning like a normal person, which is quite an achievement for the Kentucky native. At any rate, he’ll be whipped into shape by the team at XC, which includes UFC lightweights Tyson Griffin and Gray Maynard — who hopefully haven’t taken Junie’s “boring fucking wrestlers” comments too personally.

Related: Junie’s latest TUF blog for UFC.com is up, where he discusses the wave of interviews he had to do last week, Team Nog’s family-vibe, and the Jules/Vinny scrap (“To be honest, I don’t think Jules could have won a fight at 155″).