(Yeah, we don’t get it either, buddy.) 

Perhaps the most unique thing you can say about last year’s TUF: The Smashes was that it showcased the age old rivalry between England and Australia for fans who might not have known how deep-seated it truly went. It not only raised the stakes between teams to a new level, but it also played a role in the verbal (and allegedly physical) on set squabbles between coaches Ross Pearson and George Sotiropoulos, and culminated in a pretty damn entertaining fight when all was said and done.

And while TUF: Brazil 2 is currently playing LinkedIn to The Ultimate Fighter’s Facebook, there were at least a few of us who were excited to see which rivalry would be showcased on the next other, other version of TUF, which I guess you would label the MySpace of Ultimate Fighters, maybe? I dunno; management keeps telling us that we need to start writing to our key demographic (drunk, agoraphobic 14 year-olds) and I’m just trying to keep up with the times. *stares out window, finishes scotch* 

In any case, MMAFighting has passed along word that the next international season of The Ultimate Fighter will showcase the epic rivalry between…Canada and Australia. I may have lost most of my long term memory in that scaffolding accident, but I can’t seem to recall any conflict every existing between the two –it doesn’t help the Wikipedia page for “Canadian military history” is completely blank.

Why the UFC decided to go with this rivalry (or another season of Australians, for that matter) is anyone’s guess, but here are a few rivalries we think would have better suited the next international season of The Ultimate Fighter…

(Thanks to tufentertainment.net for the fitting logo.)

By Nathan Smith

With the recent announcement that Roy Nelson and Shane Carwin have been named as the coaches for the next installment of The Ultimate Fighter series, the MMA universe immediately launched into a full-blow orgasmic ticker-tape parade complete with tons of flying confetti and a marching band belting out death metal tunes. Once I heard the news, it was as if my life instantaneously turned into a beer commercial and the entire Potato Nation was invited. There was a rad pool-party, barbeque, a plethora of hotties, endless alcohol, and an overall quest for fun.

Well . . . . . actually, none of that happened. In fact, when word spread that Nelson and Carwin would helm the next season of TUF, it was officially filed under “WTF?” Judging from the comment section, most of the CP brethren didn’t care for the choices either. TUF is coming off a season that saw the ratings dip lower than they ever had, which could partially be blamed on the move to FX and the dreaded Friday night time slot. Regardless of the variables for the ratings drop, something drastic needs to be done, but is anybody really convinced that Carwin and Nelson are the answer to TUF’s slow and painful demise? Let’s start from the beginning and take a look back to see if this runaway train can be coaxed back onto the main rail.

The Season That Started it All 

The inaugural season of TUF featured future Hall of Famers Chuck Liddell and Randy Couture as the competing coaches who would go mano y mano at the PPV after the season finale. For fans of the UFC, that was good enough for most to initially tune in for the Fertitta-funded experiment. It still remains the best crop of young talent and personalities to ever grace the show; future stars like Forrest Griffin, Stephan Bonnar, Josh Koscheck, Chris Leben, Diego Sanchez, Mike Swick, Kenny Florian, and Nate Quarry were all complete unknowns vying for stardom in a fledgling sport. You mix in the whole “fatherless bastard” angle and the show was off and running even before the awe-inspiring climax between (pre TRT) FoGrif and The American Psycho. Even before that, we were treated to the greatest speech of all time that has since been condensed into a few words. “Do you wanna be a fighter?” Though there were other memorable moments from the seasons that followed, Zuffa should have quit while they were ahead because it would never be this good again. The unrefined personification of immature talent, undeniable aspirations and gonzo-sized balls oozed from the boob tube during every episode.

(Best frenemies forever.)

Through the majority of their parallel UFC careers, Stephan Bonnar has played second-banana to Forrest Griffin. The relationship started with Griffin’s career-launching win over Bonnar in their classic brawl at the first Ultimate Fighter finale in 2005; a rematch the following year resulted in the American Psycho going home with another decision loss and a steroid suspension. While Griffin was winning the UFC light-heavyweight title in 2008, Bonnar was on the sidelines due to injuries, and though Griffin occasionally ate a humiliating loss, Bonnar’s losses were even more embarrassing.

But lately, the two men have begun to shift trajectories. A not-quite-motivated Griffin suffered an ugly knockout against Mauricio Rua in Brazil last year, and is now booked in a relatively needless trilogy fight against Tito Ortiz in July. With Forrest in a holding pattern, Bonnar is now riding a three-fight win streak, with W’s over Krzysztof Soszynski, Igor Pokrajac, and Kyle Kingsbury. In other words, Griffin might be heading down the mountain, while Bonnar is somehow reaching another peak in his career — which makes it an ideal time for the two rivals to meet one last time, perhaps at the end of an Ultimate Fighter gig that would bring their lives full circle. At least, that’s how Bonnar sees it. Here’s what he told MMAJunkie Radio:

(And to think this all started with a friction-based erection.) 

Chuck Liddell has been through some shit, ladies and gentlemen. He fought through the dark ages of the UFC, and in fact helped spearhead its rise into the mainstream. And he walked that path to glory on the mangled bones and concussed skulls of his dearest friends and family. The man’s nickname is “The Iceman,” for Christ’s sake, and considering that the nickname is written in quotations, it must literally mean that he has ice flowing through his veins. So you can imagine his lack of understanding when it comes to all these pussified, liberal fighters claiming that they won’t fight their teammates nowadays. According to Liddell, these so-called fighters should put their differences aside in the cage, duke it out, and then have a beer afterward. Here’s what he told The MMA Hour: 

If (a teammate) can beat me, they can beat me. It is what it is. They deserve to fight me then. I’m not going to hold back some guy that’s in my camp if he wants to fight me. That’s not my thing. It’s just a personal choice and a personal opinion, but I think eventually, hey you guys are going at it, then go out and have two beers together afterwards. Go out there and prove who’s best that day, and go out and be friends again.

Given Liddell’s well documented feud with former teammate Tito Ortiz, you can rest assured that he is a man of his word. Hell, the fact that these two can even stand in the same room with each other, let alone pose for these kinds of pictures is pretty amazing after all that they have been through.

(Alright, Rashad, you know what to do. As soon as he offers to shake your hand, pull away at the last second and then just stroll past him like a boss.) 

The war of words between former UFC light heavyweight champion Rashad Evans and current champ Jon Jones has been brewing for what feels like forever, so much so that anyone within arms reach of either man has come under fire in the past few weeks. And at the epicenter of these disputes is none other than Evans’ former coach and Jones’ current one, Greg Jackson. Yes, ever since Rashad left Team Jackson for the greener pastures of Blackzilia, he has been rather candid when discussing what he believes was a betrayal on Jackson’s part.

When we last caught up with these two, Jones attempted to explain his side of the story, basically saying that Jackson has tried on numerous occasions to reconcile with Evans, who has instead opted to bash “the program and the history” of Team Jackson. A history that Evans himself helped build, nonetheless. “Suga,” on the other hand, felt that Jackson simply traded in his Cutlass Classic for a brand new Buick Lacrosse, so to speak. And in a recent interview with MMAWeekly, Evans expanded upon this notion, choosing to use Greg Jackson’s name as much as humanly possible:

Like I told Greg at the time, I told Greg I don’t think it would be a good idea, but Greg did what Greg wanted to do for Greg. That’s why Greg brought him on because Greg wanted to do what he wanted to do for Greg.

That’s the thing about him. Greg talks about ‘for the team, for the team.’ The team consists of ‘I’ which is Greg Jackson. That’s what the team consists of, it’s about Greg Jackson getting the ‘Coach of the Year’ awards. That’s what it consists of.

Though we all know that Greg has always been a man of the people, this seems like an unnecessarily brutal criticism by Evans, does it not?