(You dun goofed, son.)

A story of street justice out of Chicago today that makes Jon Jones’ bout of heroism seem like a boyscout helping an old lady across the street, claims that a “UFC champion” fended off an armed mugger and would-be carjacker on Friday.

According to various reports that originated from a police report of the incident that was released today, a 24-year-old career criminal got his just desserts when he pulled a gun on a seasoned MMA fighter and ordered him out of his vehicle after lightening his wallet.