bad celebrity tattoos
20 Celebrities With Truly Awful Tattoos

Tag: Rousimar Palhares

25 MMA Reaction GIFs for All Occasions


(Matt Hughes doesn’t need to say it. But yes, it’s whatever.)

Reaction GIFs are the world’s most perfect means of communication. Why waste time typing out actual words about how you’re feeling when you can just link to other people’s facial expressions? The next time you find yourself in a heated comments section, fire off one of these MMA-related reaction GIFs. Use the next page links to move through the list, and enjoy…

When you’ve defeated a bitter rival:

When you just laughed at something you shouldn’t have laughed at:

Read More DIGG THIS

Yushin Okami to Face the Complete Opposite of Yushin Okami in WSOF Debut


(Savov poses with his Bulgarian pop star girlfriend, Desi Slava, while Okami can only crysterbate into a box of tissues offscreen.)

After signing a multi-fight deal with World Series of Fighting back in October, former UFC middleweight title challenger Yushin Okami finally has a date set for his promotional debut.

If you recall, Okami was released from the UFC last September (to make room for the Jumabieke Tuerxuns of the world) despite going 3-1 in his last 4 fights, because whatever, fuck you. “Thunder” was quickly snatched up by the WSOF but has been sitting on the shelf ever since his signing for reasons unknown. Regardless, it was announced earlier today that Okami will make his promotional debut against Bulgarian Svetlozar Savov at WSOF 9 on March 29th.

With 11 finishes in his 12 victories, Savov is pretty much the antithesis of Okami, who collected just 4 stoppages in his 18-fight UFC career. That being said, expect Okami to come in as a huge favorite here. Not Cormier vs. Cummins huge, but somewhere around that. Thankfully, this squash match will likely slip completely under the radar once Rousimar Palhares inevitably maims Steve Carl in the evening’s main event.

Seriously, I cannot begin to comprehend why the WSOF is essentially rewarding Paul Harris for his repeated acts of douchebaggery in the cage by giving him an immediate title shot — it’s like giving a convicted arsonist a book of matches, a gallon of kerosene, and the keys to the home of the judge who sentenced him. “Tickets got to be sold,” I guess.

-J. Jones

Read More DIGG THIS

Rousimar Palhares vs. Steve Carl Title Fight Booked for World Series of Fighting 9 Main Event


(Props: The UG)

After signing Rousimar Palhares in November, World Series of Fighting is fast-tracking the unpredictable heel-hook artist to a title fight against the promotion’s reigning welterweight champ, Steve Carl. MMAJunkie reports that Carl vs. Palhares will headline WSOF 9, March 29th at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas. The event will be co-headlined by the inaugural WSOF bantamweight title fight between Marlon Moraes and Josh Rettinghouse.

A former Bellator vet, Steve Carl has won his last seven fights including three consecutive submission victories under the WSOF banner. His fourth-round triangle-choke of Josh Burkman won him World Series of Fighting’s 170-pound title back in October.

Palhares, of course, is the Brazilian maniac who was fired by the UFC for holding onto Mike Pierce’s leg after the referee intervened at UFC Fight Night 29 — the final straw in a controversial UFC career that included a similar incident against Tomasz Drwal, an elevated testosterone bust, and repeated episodes of excessive flexing. World Series of Fighting has already warned Palhares that they won’t tolerate any crazy behavior on their watch. Unfortunately, Palhares has the mind of a jungle-native and the impulse-control of an excited five-year-old at California Pizza Kitchen.

Palhares’s upcoming fight against Carl will be a much-needed opportunity to prove that he can behave like a professional, and we truly hope he can straighten out his head. But either way, kudos to World Series of Fighting for getting us to actually care about a Steve Carl title defense. This one should be interesting, folks…

Read More DIGG THIS

Rousimar Palhares Is World Series of Fighting’s Problem Now


(Palhares would later describe this moment as “the first time I’ve ever been on an airplane.” / Props: @ToquinhoMMA)

When it comes to picking up the UFC’s leftovers, World Series of Fighting and Bellator have displayed two very different approaches. While Bellator tends to sign the most washed-up UFC castoffs in order to make their home-grown fighters look impressive when they beat the UFC guys (or to create negative buzz around a surely-doomed PPV), World Series of Fighting tries to pick up the best UFC castoffs available, in the hopes that fighters like Anthony Johnson, Miguel Torres, Jon Fitch, and Yushin Okami are famous enough to draw fans on their own. Bellator would rather avoid having champions who weren’t good enough to keep their jobs with Zuffa. For World Series of Fighting, having a UFC veteran win a belt is the kind of promotional hook they’ve been working towards all along.

I mention all of that to help explain why World Series of Fighting has just signed Rousimar Palhares to a multi-fight contract. Yes, he’s been bounced out of the UFC for causing undue injury to his opponents, and any organization that signs him isn’t doing the sport any favors. On the other hand, Palhares is incredibly talented, a ferocious fight-finisher, a consistent generator of controversy and awesome GIFs — the kind of athlete that any B-level MMA league (besides Bellator) would kill to get their hands on.

Palhares is expected to make his WSOF debut in March, against an opponent to be named later. Jon Fitch has already pre-emptively turned down the fight, but matching Toquinho up against another American wrestler is a possibility. As MMAJunkie reports:

Read More DIGG THIS

Renzo Gracie Just Provided the Most Astute Analysis of Rousimar Palhares Ever


(Let’s just say that the cake with a stripper in it ended in a goddamn bloodbath.) 

Much has been done to try and explain away the assholish behavior of Rousimar Palhares in the wake of AnkleGate ’13. Although “Toquinho” —  which means either “Tree Stump,” “The Brazilian Ankle-Eating Sasquatch,” or “OH GOD, I TAP! I TAP!!” depending on who you ask — has been notoriously dubbed a dirty fighter for his inability to release a submission hold when prompted, it was his knee-obliterating heel hook of Mike Pierce at Fight Night 29 that truly took the blood-filled cake, forcing the UFC to release Palhares back into the jungles of Brazil forevermore.

Recently, it was announced that Palhares would emerge from hiding to take on UFC veteran Dean Lister in a submission-only match at the 2013 World Jiu-Jitsu Expo. The MMA world reacted with equal parts fear and excitement — kind of like how Rousimar reacts when he catches his reflection in a puddle. Sadly, WJJE president Renzo Gracie broke the news earlier today that a shoulder injury has forced Palhares out of the match. That is not the must-read material. Renzo’s analysis of Rousimar Palhares the person, however, absolutely is:

Palhares is like a 12 years old kid. He was raised in a farm in Brazil, and you can’t picture a farm in Iowa. He’s so naive. The reality is, he has a completely different mindset. They’re born like Indians, and it’s like getting an Indian from the jungle and expect them to live here.

While this analogy is undoubtedly hilarious, we all know that Paul Harris was actually born in a radioactive swamp and raised in captivity.

Read More DIGG THIS

Dean Lister Loses His F*cking Mind, Agrees to Submission-Only Match With Paul Harris at 2013 World Jiu-Jitsu Expo


(After seeing this photo, Palhares could only ask why Lister “didn’t require a referee to yank him off his opponent like a normal person.”)

The emotional effects of post-UFC life on the average fighter is a subject that has both been vigorously discussed and tremendously explored. In the nearly 10 years since the promotion held its first event, several brave souls have attempted to shed a light on what it means to be a UFC fighter (or to have been), be it through autobiographies, documentaries, or a series of increasingly depressing public appearances. There was also Bar Brawler, but that tale of insanity is in a class of its own.

Kenny Florian is a good example of a fighter who has successfully adjusted to life outside of fighting, having parlayed his extensive career with the UFC into a multitude of desk jobs including UFC on FOX analyst, MMA Live and UFC Tonight co-host, and the sole speck of personality present during a UFC on FUEL broadcast. Veterans like Luke Cummo, on the other hand, left the UFC on a spaceship to live with the Bull Pegasus on Planet Bathsaltia forevermore.

What I’m getting at is, there are fighters who have followed the KenFlo path of post-UFC life and there are those who have followed the Mayhem Miller path of self destruction. Based on the news passed along by Graciemag last night, it seems we can assume that UFC veteran Dean Lister falls into the latter category, as he has *voluntarily* accepted a short-notice, submission-only Jiu-Jitsu match with Rousimar Palhares at this year’s World Jiu-Jitsu Expo on November 9th.

Read More DIGG THIS

MRI Reveals Severe Sprain in Mike Pierce’s Left Knee From Palhares Heel Hook


(Photo via Getty)

For the moment, it appears as if UFC welterweight Mike Pierce will not need surgery to repair the knee injured by Rousimar Palhares’ hulk-smash heel hook at UFC Fight Night 29. That’s the good news. The bad news is that an MRI shows that Pierce’s left knee is indeed badly injured and will force him out of action for a good while.

MMA Junkie reports that an MRI of Pierce’s left knee indicated a “severe MCL sprain.” Pierce and his team are awaiting results on imaging on his left ankle, which was also injured by the hold. Palhares forced Pierce to submit in just over thirty seconds during their main card bout in Brazil, but Palhares refused to immediately let go of the hold — even after the referee had clearly interceded — giving Pierce’s leg one last tug before letting go.

It wasn’t the first time Palhares refused to obey referee orders after forcing an opponent to tap out and the California Pizza Kitchen-lovin’ man-beast was promptly released by the UFC for the latest offense. Pierce was medically suspended for 180 days directly after the fight.

We’ll bring you updates on his condition as they are made known.

-Elias Cepeda

Read More DIGG THIS

Amazingly, Every Fighter at ‘UFC Fight Night 29′ Managed to Pass His Drug Test


(In retrospect, maybe these guys could have *used* a little steroids. / Photo via Getty)

On the main card alone, last week’s UFC Fight Night 29 event featured a guy who previously pissed dirty for steroids (Joey Beltran), a fake-urine submitting pot smoker (Thiago Silva), one of the UFC’s many “elevated testosterone” violators (Rousimar Palhares), and a guy who failed a drug test for undisclosed reasons, so we’re just going to assume it was weed (Jake Shields). We’ve been waiting for the card’s drug test results with baited breath, and to our surprise, it looks like everybody’s in the clear. As MMAFighting reports:

All 20 UFC Fight Night 29 fighters passed their drug tests. Brazilian MMA Athletic Commission (CABMMA) tested every fighter before their bouts on Oct. 9 in Barueri, Brazil. After the bouts, the headliners – Demian Maia and Jake Shields – were tested again, in addition to four other randomly selected fighters…all results came back negative.”

This is especially good news for Thiago Silva, who has had two of his last four UFC wins knocked down to no-contests, and is now riding his first legitimate win streak since 2007-2008. Of course, Silva missed weight by three pounds for his UFC Fight Night 29 bout against Matt Hamill, so I guess we should put an asterisk next to that win as well, but still, it’s progress.

Read More DIGG THIS

Palhares-Gate Update: Bellator Doesn’t Want Him, Palhares Issues Half-Assed Apology


(Rousimar Palhares doing “God’s work.” / Photo via Getty Images)

Remember when we described serial knee-destroyer Rousimar Palhares as a “good-natured idiot-manchild“? Well, apparently Bellator has a similar opinion of the Brazilian.

At least that’s the impression we get from their recent decision not to sign him. Bjorn Rebney told TMZ the following about why he his Viacom puppet master decided to pass on Palhares:

“Risks already exist for the courageous, world class fighters who either enter the Bellator cage; without adding further unnecessary risks into the mix. Fighter safety is paramount to me and my team.”

That eliminates one destination for the recently disgraced Palhares — MMA’s version of Lenny from Of Mice and Men. Maybe he’ll go to World Series of Fighting, although Jon Fitch has already refused a hypothetical fight against him due to safety concerns. But it seems like Bellator missed a good catch here. Palhares is a talented fighter coming off a win. He had tons of heat, so the signing would’ve generated tons of press — for a Bellator signing, anyway — or at least more press than signing a UFC castaway whose career highlight is getting kicked in the face.

Palhares (or his people) sensed that he was becoming damaged goods. Consequently, he issued an explanation/apology yesterday that you can check out after the jump.

Read More DIGG THIS

Friday Link Dump: Palhares Catches Four-Month Suspension From Brazilian Athletic Commission, GSP’s Training Camp Secret Weapon, Ket Kelley Gets Naked-er + Much More


(You will learn so much about oil refinery turnarounds from this video. Or maybe you won’t. But either way, holy crap @ those jugs. / Props: Guyism)

Rousimar Palhares Issued 120-Day Suspension from Brazilian Athletic Commission (BleacherReport)

Only Fighter to Beat Johny Hendricks Helping Georges St-Pierre Prepare for Title Fight (MMAFighting)

Invicta FC 7 slated for Dec. 7 with three title fights, Honchak-Smith Headliner (MMAJunkie)

Kat Kelley Is Taking More of Her Clothes Off on MIMP. Get in Here Right Now. (MeInMyPlace, kinda NSFW)

Report: Bellator Will Waive Contractual Rights to Ben Askren if ‘Funky’ Gets Immediate UFC Title Shot (MMAMania)

UFC: Chuck Liddell Will Be Murder Suspect on FOX Hit Series ‘Bones’ (BloodyElbow)

‘Frank Shamrock: Bound by Blood’ Is a Must-See Documentary for All the Right Reasons (FightOpinion)

Now THAT is a broken nose… (Facebook.com/CagePotato)

How to Work Out and Exercise with ACL Injuries (MensFitness)

The Sexy Women of ‘Machete Kills’ (MadeMan)

The 25 Most Shocking Sports Moments of the Past 25 Years (Complex)

8 Examples of People Taking Things Too Literally (DoubleViking)

The YouTube Comments Choir (WorldwideInterweb)

The Best Halloween Vines (Break)

Read More DIGG THIS
CagePotatoMMA