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Tag: Tank Abbott

“Pee Wee” Herman in at Street Certified; Kimbo’s New Video Here

Looks like Dave “Pee Wee” Herman is being added to the EliteXC February 16th card. The heavyweight is 9-0 and will be fighting Seth Petruzelli – yes, the same Petruzelli from TUF 2. Petruzelli is 9-4. The two heavyweight fighters will square off in Miami. This is the first in a multi-fight deal for “Pee Wee”.

Herman is a hot prospect and has knocked out six of his nine opponents and has never gone to the second round. He’s only been pro for about 13 months, so he obviously likes the cage. Petruzelli is 2-2 since TUF 2, both of those losses coming in the UFC.

Showtime will air the “Street Certified” event where the main event will see Kimbo attempting to rip that dumbass goatee right off of Tank Abbott’s face.

Here’s what things are looking like for the 16th:

Tank Abbott vs. Kimbo Slice
Ricco Rodriguez vs. Antonio Silva
Yves Edwards vs. Edson Berto
Dave Herman vs. Seth Petruzelli
Kyle Noke vs. Scott Smith
Brett Roges vs. James Thompson

In Kimbo’s latest video, he talks about his web mastering skills, making his johnson look big, and the guy is obsessed with beatin’ down Sean Gannon.


Tank Abbott vs. Leno, Letterman


For those of you who fall into one of the following categories:

a) I Love Tank Abbott.
b) I Love “Jimmy Kimmel Live”.
c) I stay up late to catch whatever is on against Letterman or Leno.
d) I am Kimbo Slice.

…the following is for you.


This just in: The always colorful, entertaining and unpredictable David “Tank” Abbott will be a special guest on the nationally televised Jimmy Kimmel Live show tonight/Thursday at 12:05 a.m. ET/PT on ABC.

Tank (, one of the original Mixed Martial Arts bad boys and most ferocious knockout artists in history, will discuss, among other things, his eagerly anticipated, long-awaited grudge fight with Kimbo Slice ( set for Saturday, Feb. 16, at the BankUnited Center at the University of Miami on SHOWTIME.

Other guests Thursday will include reality show star Heidi Montague of the “The Hills.”


Week in Review: Is Anybody Else Sick of Jason “Mayhem” Miller?

(Not funny.)

— Bas Rutten starred in the best YTMND page of all-time. (last link)

MMA Girl Joanne enchanted us with an exclusive video interview.

— We got overly emotional about Gina Carano.

EliteXC signed two members of the Shamrock family. Unfortunately, neither one was Frank. We marveled at Ryan’s physique and gave Ken some encouragement.

— The UFC filed a lawsuit against Randy Couture. Your move, Natural.

— We solicited your predictions for the Kimbo Slice/Tank Abbott fight, then liveblogged their press conference.

— We counted down the best fights that didn’t take place in a ring or cage.

— We put $1,000 up for grabs in the Serious Pimp t-shirt design contest.

— Instead of predicting UFC 80‘s winners, we predicted the bonuses. (Reminder: Come back tomorrow at 3 p.m. ET for the UFC 80 liveblog. Good times guaranteed.)

We coped with a slow news day.

Have a great weekend, people. Stay hungry.


Liveblog: Kimbo Slice/Tank Abbott Conference Call; Tank Prefers “Potato Juice”


As promised earlier…

Click the “MORE” link and refresh the page every couple minutes to see the latest announcements and trash-talk from the EliteXC “Street Certified” conference call. Because knowing, as some say, is 50% of the battle.


Kimbo Slice/Tank Abbott Conference Call Today: Now Accepting Your Questions

(Tank Abbott, after eating 200 deviled eggs.)

Heads up, Potato Nation: EliteXC is holding a media conference call today at 4 p.m. ET, where Kevin “Kimbo Slice” Ferguson, David “Tank” Abbott, and EliteXC live events president Gary Shaw will be taking questions about the upcoming “Street Certified” event in Miami on February 16. I’ll be liveblogging it, so be sure to tune in later for the play-by-play.

Each media outlet generally gets to ask 1-3 questions at these things, so if you have any queries for the guys that are relatively insightful and won’t get me banned from future conference calls, post ‘em in the comments. And if you haven’t thrown in a prediction for the Kimbo/Tank fight yet, do it!


Kimbo Slice: “When It’s Time Come to Bump, You Gonna Bump.”

ProElite has put together a new promo video to hype the Kimbo Slice/Tank Abbott fight on February 16. Two things stand out: First, Tank only gets about 1.5 seconds of screen time; maybe this was done so that uninformed Kimbo fans don’t see recent footage of Tank in action and immediately lose their excitement for this ugly mismatch. Second, ProElite is getting a lot of mileage from Kimbo’s three-punch victory over Bo Cantrell. This is like the video-editing equivalent to Native Americans using every part of the buffalo.

So let’s try to call it. I’m saying that the fight will end at 0:59 of the first round — generous, I know — with Kimbo winning it by TKO (punches). Put down your predictions in the comments section below. The reader who calls it closest gets a fantastic prize to be named later. I’m also willing to entertain side-bets from readers who think Tank is going to pull out a surprise victory. Watch the video, then have at it…

UPDATE: Alright, this is Tank’s promo clip. There’s something a little sad about that shot of him running up the hill and stopping to shadow-box. Getting strong now!


‘Most Significant Fight Card in the History of MMA…’


EliteXC sent out a press release yesterday announcing that tickets to their February 16th event featuring Kimbo Slice and Tank Abbott will go on sale this Friday at Ticketmaster, and confirming that the event will take place at the BankUnited Center at the University of Miami. Check the first sentence:

“Fans seeking to participate in perhaps the biggest, most significant fight card in the history of mixed martial arts in Florida will have the opportunity to reserve their spots beginning this Friday, Jan. 11, when tickets to EliteXC’s tremendous mega-event on Saturday, Feb. 16, will go on sale.”

At first, I skipped over that “in Florida” part and nearly shot Scotch out of my nose. Upon re-reading, I was still unconvinced. Surely this sideshow won’t be bigger than the UFC’s record-breaking Ortiz/Shamrock III event, or UFC 42, which featured Matt Hughes’s five-round war with Sean Sherk. Personally, I don’t think it’ll even be as significant as those smoker matches Din Thomas was arrested for last year — I mean, Din kinda became our Rosa Parks after that one. I love fight-hype as much as the next guy, but to paraphrase John Lennon, if you start referring to Slice/Abbott as a “tremendous mega-event,” you ain’t gonna make it with anyone anyhow.

I’ve ranted before about how unfortunate of a move this fight is for Kevin Ferguson and EliteXC, so I’ll spare you this time. Instead, I’ll post this bizarre video of Tank Abbott drunkenly mouthing off to a guy wearing a Kimbo Slice mask (at a bar? in his basement?), which looks to be directed by David Lynch and shot with the same camera used to record Rick Salomon banging Paris Hilton.


Video of the Weekend: “A Morning With Kimbo”

Fresh off the announcement that Kevin “Kimbo Slice” Ferguson will be facing Tank Abbott at an EliteXC event on February 16, Triumph United has released a video of Kimbo in the gym, talking about his upcoming fight with Tank, his disappointingly short beatdown of Bo Cantrell, and the fact that entire rooms get dark when he pulls his pants down. We particularly appreciate his use of the phrase “real talk.” CagePotato and R. Kelly salute you…


Kimbo vs. Tank: It’s On, Unfortunately

(Ferguson verbally agrees to fight Abbott after defeating Ray Mercer at Cage Fury FC in June 2007.)

According to Sam Caplan’s blog on, Kevin “Kimbo Slice” Ferguson has been scheduled to headline EliteXC’s next card on February 16th against 42-year-old brawler Tank Abbott; the event will likely go down in Ferguson’s home city of Miami. Abbott and Ferguson had originally been scheduled to fight each other in October of last year for the Cage Fury Fighting Championships organization, but the event was canceled due to financial difficulties, after which Kimbo signed an exclusive deal with EliteXC that pays him more than six figures a fight.

Abbott has a career record of 10-13, has lost 7 of his last 9 matches, and placed #2 in our list of dudes who should quit. Putting Abbott against Ferguson may interest fans who followed Tank’s UFC glory days in the mid-’90s, but it’s insulting to Kimbo; it further ghettoizes him as a freak-show act, rather than validating him as a serious mixed martial artist. We’ve posted about this before, but we’ll repeat it: Kimbo deserves better. He’s been devoted to MMA training for the better part of a year and has an intimidation factor not seen since Mike Tyson in the ’80s. Yet EliteXC still seems unwilling to risk having him go up against a credible opponent and lose. In terms of his career, Ferguson needs a challenging fight more than anything else right now, to prove that his hype is justified. After February, there will still be detactors saying “Kimbo ain’t shit, just see what happens when you put him up against a real fighter.”


Idiotic Rumor: EliteXC’s 4-Way Freak Show


I wasn’t planning on posting about this — mainly because it’s ridiculous and there’s no real source — but it keeps popping up so I feel like I need to weigh in. Basically, is floating a rumor that EliteXC is considering a four-man heavyweight tournament that would include Kimbo Slice, Bob Sapp, Butterbean, and Tank Abbott.