(Chick vs. dude grappling match ends badly for the dude. Props: nate53202)

Some selected highlights from our friends around the MMA blogosphere…

- Strikeforce ‘Melendez vs. Masvidal’ Fighter Salaries (MMA Convert)

- The Outlaw and the Losing Streak (MMA Fighting)

- Top 10 Biggest MMA Upsets in 2011 (The Fight Nerd)

- Meet the Flyweights: Interview With Debuting UFC 125-Pounder Ian McCall (MMA Mania)

- Photo Gallery: Satoshi Ishii Trains at Black House for Fedor Emelianenko Fight (Lowkick.Blitzcorner.com)

- Jordan Breen: People Wouldn’t Intensely Hate Jon Jones if He Was White (Fight Opinion)

- Josh Barnett Booked for Pro Wrestling Match in Dream’s NYE Event (5th Round)

- Why There Will Never Be a Dominant UFC Heavyweight Champion (BleacherReport.com/MMA)

- Cooking With Tim Kennedy: Killer Texas Chili (MiddleEasy)

- Update on Zuffa vs. New York Lawsuit (MMA Payout)

- Fourth Time’s a Charm: Kenny Florian Back at Lightweight Seeking UFC Gold (FightLine)

- Jorge Masvidal Fought With an Injured Right Hand Against Gilbert Melendez (Five Ounces of Pain)

(Video courtesy of YouTube/RangerUpVideo)

We’ve considered inviting the think lab at Ranger Up Clothing if they’d consider coming to work for us, but we didn’t for fear that they’d laugh at us and punch us in the face just for asking.

At least we’ve still got their hilarious pre-fight smack talk videos.

(Photos: MMAMania.com & CombatLifestyle.com)

It looks like all of the circumstantial evidence suggesting that Tim Kennedy was packing his rucksack and heading to the UFC was a false alarm. That, or Zuffa realized that Strikeforce’s middleweight herd was thin on credible challengers and decided to keep their most decorated fighter on the roster for a bit longer. Tatame.com reports that the bout is likely to take place in January of next year.

Luke Rockhold returned to action last September, shaking off seventeen months of ring rust in a title bout with Strikeforce Middleweight Champion Ronaldo Souza. Rockhold was predictably a massive underdog, but he got the better of “Jacare” throughout the five round affair and took the belt in a unanimous decision. That “W” marked Rockhold’s seventh straight victory.

Kennedy was unsuccessful in his own title bid against Jacare last October, taking the champ the distance but coming up short on all three judges’ scorecards. Since then he’s racked up wins over Melvin Manhoef and Robbie Lawler.

This is second time the pair has been scheduled to fight. Their original bout was scrapped back in February when Rockhold suffered a leg injury in training.

The Marines, enjoying someone fighting for them for a change. (Photo: MMAOnTap.com)

There is no shortage of military metaphors in the world of MMA. “War Diaz.” “War Penn.” Our athletes don’t just compete, they go to battle. Even that shirt you claim not to own is ‘an expression of combat known worldwide’.

But these are mere words. For a select few of the sport’s elite, the challenges they encounter inside of the cage are nothing compared to the trials they signed up for by enlisting in the armed forces. It turns out the reasons MMA fighters serve their country, and their experiences in the military, are as varied as anyone else’s. As we celebrate Veteran’s Day, check out a quick glimpse of their lives in uniform.

Thanks to the folks at Ranger Up for making their crew available.

(And in case I don’t see you, good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.) 

In what appears to be another step towards Strikeforce’s eventual collapse, rumor has it that former Strikeforce middleweight title challenger Tim Kennedy is on his way to the UFC. The first red flag that got people’s attention was oddly enough Tim’s Facebook page, where he recently added the UFC to his list of employers. Shortly after, Kennedy’s fighter profile popped up on the UFC’s UK website, then eventually the UFC’s main website, so unless someone with very strange goals has hacked the UFC mainframe, I’d say this is about a lock.

(Indeed. Props: ahura)

Last night I had the misfortune of seeing about 30 seconds of the CW reality show H8R. (That’s pronounced “hater,” grandpa.) In this particular episode, Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis tried to convince some chick that he wasn’t in fact the greatest douchebag of our generation. His primary defense was that the girl didn’t know him personally, and was judging him based only on the “character” she knows from GGW — you know, the character he created. Awful. Just awful. And yet, I’d love to see an episode of that show starring UFC light-heavyweight champion Jon Jones.

As soon as Jones won his belt, he immediately went from a widely beloved underdog story (“he learned his striking from YouTube videos, you guys!”) to a lightning rod for message-board criticism. Exactly why some fans seem to passionately dislike Bones is a topic that we’ll discuss more in depth on tomorrow’s episode of The Bum Rush. In the meantime, I decided to revive an old CagePotato feature — “What Your Favorite Fighter Says About You” and its sequel — and twist it to reflect today’s hate-crazed MMA climate. So, for example, if your least-favorite fighter is…

JON FITCH

(Video courtesy of Vimeo/MMACOMPILER.COM)

If you didn’t get a chance to watch Strikeforce middleweight and proud U.S. Army Ranger Tim Kennedy’s appearance on Wednesday night’s special live episode of Deadliest Warrior, don’t worry, we got you.

The premise of the episode was, “Who would win between the U.S. Army Rangers and North Korean Special Ops in a battle?” Kennedy represented the Rangers — the world’s most elite light infantry unit — in each of the areas the team collected data from during the show,  including sniping and hand-to-hand combat. We won’t give away the results, but we will say that we’d want Tim on our side if we were ever in a bad situation.

(“Fedor, it’s an honor to fight you. And Scott, no matter what happens tonight, I’ll be violently sodomizing you later.” Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle. For more photos from this album, click here.)

There might not be much on the line in the grand scheme of things, but make no mistake — Fedor Emelianenko vs. Dan Henderson is a superfight. It’s rare that two MMA fighters with so many combined accolades step into the same cage to do battle. Thanks for coming by tonight and watching it with us.

Also on the card: the 135-pound women’s title fight between Marloes Coenen and Miesha Tate, and a pack of heavy-hitting supporting players like Robbie Lawler, Tim Kennedy, Paul Daley, and Scott Smith.

Live round-by-round results from the Showtime broadcast of Strikeforce: Fedor vs. Henderson will be piling up after the jump beginning at 10 p.m. ET. Refresh the page for all the latest and let your thoughts be heard in the comments section, even if they’re relatively stupid thoughts like, “DAAAAYYUM HE GOT NOCKED THE FUGGOUT!!1!” Come on in…

It may be five years too late for the winner of tonight’s Fedor vs. Henderson bout to gain anything other than bragging rights, but that isn’t stopping us from being excited. Those of you who saw yesterday’s link dump already know that Fedor is only seven pounds lighter than he was when he fought Antonio Silva. Even though the scale doesn’t show it, Fedor looks more athletic than we’re accustomed to seeing him. Of course, if you’ve been paying attention you aren’t too surprised. Dan Henderson made weight as well, tipping the scales at 207 pounds.

To get an idea of how small Fedor is for a heavyweight, skip to about the two minute mark. Even though Fedor has the sixteen pound weight advantage, you wouldn’t know it by looking at him standing next to Hendo. Henderson, who pretty much came into this fight at light heavyweight, appears to be the same size as Fedor. And remember, Dan Henderson isn’t exactly the Anthony Johnson of the light heavyweight division.

Everyone else on tonight’s card made weight for their fights. Yes, this includes Paul Daley, who weighed in at 171 pounds for his fight against Tyron Woodley. Full results, courtesy of mmafighting.com, are after the jump.

(Video courtesy of AOL Fanhouse)

All of the main card fighters from tomorrow night’s Strikeforce: Fedor vs. Henderson card, save women’s welterweight champ Marloes Coenen were in attendance for the event’s pre-fight press conference at Harry Caray’s Italian Steakhouse in Chicago last night.

Check out some of the highlights of the presser for those who can’t watch the video at work, after the jump.

Photographic proof that ReX tried to end Jason’s baby making days.

Strikeforce: Fedor vs. Henderson goes down tomorrow night at the Sears Centre just outside of Chicago.  To help get you in the proper spirit, Doug “ReX13” Richardson and Jason Moles have returned to eloquently debate some of the more important storylines surrounding this historic event. Will Fedor go 0 for 3?  If so, will the internets asplode?  Are we nearing the end of women’s MMA on the big stage? Who gives worse gambling advice, ReX or Jason? Do us a favor and slog through this painfully long column, then let us know your own thoughts in the comments section.

By Jason Moles

Earlier this week, news broke that Ranger Up — a longtime sponsor of MMA fighters who have served in the U.S. military, and a passionate lover of America — has been forced to exit the building. Ranger Up CEO Nick Palmisciano was informed by Zuffa that his company would need to pay the recently-established Strikeforce sponsor fee if their fighters were to wear any RU gear at upcoming Strikeforce events. Most notably, this affects former Marine Liz Carmouche, who faces Sarah Kaufman at tonight’s Challengers event in Las Vegas, as well as bionic super-soldier Tim Kennedy, who’s slated to take on Robbie Lawler on the main card of Fedor vs. Henderson.

“[They] told us in a very professional way,” Palmisciano explained to CagePotato.com. “I’ve said it before and I’ll say it now, I completely understand. It’s a business deal and I’ve got no hard feelings. I think it’s a good business decision for them and from my position, I don’t feel like we’re owed anything.”

That’s very gracious of him, but the fighters are still going to be losing money unless another sponsor picks them up, right? Wrong. “I know it sounds cheesy, but the military is a family and we are very passionate about what we do in taking care of the people in our community,” Palmisciano said. “We’ve been sponsoring Tim Kennedy since 2006 and we’re not going to all of a sudden treat a member of our family differently because an organization imposes a fee that prohibits us from going forward with the deal that we had. We’re going to continue to support both fighters like they were already and they will both get paid from Ranger Up like they expected to for this fight and in the future.”

Continuing in Zuffa’s new social media trend of announcing newly-signed bouts before the MMA media gets wind of them, Strikeforce announced today via Twitter that a middleweight bout between Tim Kennedy and Robbie Lawler has been added to its July 30 Fedor vs. Henderson card in Chicago.

(Back when Ken was making more than GSP…)

The TUF 11 Finale went down 1 year ago.

Why it matters:

Five of the fighters from the show are still active in the UFC and four are undefeated in the Octagon.

TUF winner Court McGee, who defeated Kris McCray in the finale by rear naked choke also beat Ryan Jensen by arm triangle at UFC 121 in October. He’s set to face Don Yi Yang at UFN “Battle at the Bayou” in September.

Kyle Noke, who was beaten by teammate McCray by unanimous decision in the quarterfinals of the show, defeated Josh Bryant by TKO at the finale and rattled off two rear naked choke submission wins against Rob Kimmons at UFC 122 in November and TUF 11 cast mate Chris Camozzi at UFC 127 at home in Australia in February. He’ll face Tom Lawlor next at UFC Live: Hardy vs. Lytle in August.

Brad Tavares, who lost to McGee in the semi-finals by rear naked choke is undefeated in official competition as well as 2-0 in the Octagon.He defeated TUF 11 quarterfinal opponent Seth Baczynski at the finale by unanimous decision and Phil Baroni by knockout at UFC 125 in January.

(Thank Crom somewhere along the way, they decided to wear shorts.)

36 years ago: MMA’s version of Yoda, Greg Jackson, was born in Washington, DC.

34 years ago: UFC middleweight and former CagePotato TUF 11 guest blogger Rich Attonito was born in Elizabeth, New Jersey.

Check out the rest after the jump.

(Guess if they’re gonna let *somebody* fight Bisping, it might as well be somebody we like.)

When last we heard from Tim Kennedy, he’d just completed the MMA equivalent of sinking a two-foot putt by choking out Melvin Manhoef in Strikeforce, then went public with his lament that he hadn’t been the one to administer an in-home eye exam to Osama bin Laden. Y’all know we’ve always liked Kennedy. Seems like a super cool dude and admittedly there’s something fascinating about a guy whose typical day might just as easily include either choking out a Dutch-Surinamese kickboxer or smoking the world’s top terrorist. Give or take.

It’s exactly that admiration that led us to be a bit disappointed this week when we heard about Kennedy offering to fight Michael Bisping over at MMA Weekly. Calling out Bisping is one of the more played-out moves a well-known middleweight can make, after all. When we saw Kennedy saying it, we assumed it was just another case of a guy trying to make his bones off Bisping’s inflated reputation and general overratedness. Truthfully, there probably is some of that at work here. But then we started digging into Kennedy’s quotes and realized that A) He’s offering to fight “The Count” basically for free (PR bump notwithstanding) and B) He seems driven to do it out of moral obligation, more than anything else. As far as we’re concerned that – as long as he’s not just bullshitting us – is pretty cool.

(Edith Labelle: Still alive. Photo proof via Harris Masood/MMAMania)

Some selected highlights from our friends around the MMA blogosphere. E-mail feedback@cagepotato.com for details on how your site can join the MMA Link Club…

- Five Lessons: UFC 129 (NBC Sports MMA)

- Jon Fitch Says He and GSP Both Deserve Some Criticism for Decisions (MMA Fighting)

- Watch and Listen: The 50 Best Entrance Songs in the History of the UFC (BleacherReport.com/MMA)

- Tim Kennedy Weighs in on the Killing of Osama Bin Laden (MiddleEasy)

- Bob Sapp Was Busy Being Bob Sapp Last Weekend (MMA-Scraps)

- Great Expectations: The Problem With Georges St. Pierre (MMA Convert)

- Vladimir Matyushenko Wants Tito Ortiz or Little Nog Next (LowKick)

- Gabriel Gonzaga to Emerge From Brief Retirement at ‘Heavyweight Xplosion’ in June (Five Ounces of Pain)

- Jake Ellenberger Undergoes Hand Surgery Following UFC 129 Knockout Victory (5thRound)

(“Alright ladies, now smile as if you have any f*cking clue what’s going on right now.”)

Thanks to everybody who entered this week’s caption contest, which produced over 200 entries, most of them pretty damn funny. And yet, only three of you will be earning t-shirts from Alchemist Clothing. Doesn’t seem fair, does it? Anyway, let’s begin with some honorable mentions…

destinationblood: All they had left at the Halloween store was stewardess costumes, Rambo guns and a Fred Flintstone tie.

J. Spaceman: Hey Frye, this is how a real man pads his record!

missedcue: Even elite MMA fighters need Apple tech support.

missedcue, again: Dana: “Yeah I guess that’s cool but you still ain’t getting into the Smasher Group.”

intercept440: GAY TEST: If you notice the inconspicous black guy in the back ground…I have some bad news for you.
[Ed. note: Or, if you noticed Tim's pants before anything else...]

Ajax Says: After what happened in the fifth grade, Tim swore he would never have a bad yearbook picture ever again.

MaxS: No ladies that’s NOT a gun in my pocket…that’s just what “Ranger Up” means.

Morningwood: Now THIS is how you raise 120 bucks!

And now, the big winners:

(Nate Marquardt’s UFC 128 walkout shirt — just one of many fine shirts available at AlchemistClothing.com)

You may know Alchemist as the MMA management company fronted by MC Hammer. You may not know that Alchemist has its own clothing line, featuring signature shirts created for its stable of fighters including Nate Marquardt, Jorge Rivera, and Stefan Struve. To help spread the word, Alchemist is giving us three t-shirts to give away to CagePotato readers. As always, there’s a catch.

Check out the photo after the jump of Tim Kennedy fist-posing next to his personal stewardesses, and write a clever caption in the comments section. Submit your entries by Friday morning at 9 a.m. ET, and we’ll announce three winners later that day; if you’re one of them, you get an Alchemist shirt of your choice. Any questions? For more free swag, ‘Like’ Alchemist on Facebook and follow them on Twitter. They do giveaways more often than Charlie Sheen does pornstars. (#hey-oh #topicalhumor)

(This man could well be a millionaire by now. How does that make you feel? Pic: Combat Lifestyle)

For anyone still holding onto lingering questions about why Dan Henderson opted to sign with Strikeforce over the UFC in late 2009 or why the company fast-forwarded him into a second title shot on Saturday with a promotional record of just 1-1, here’s pretty much everything you need to know: According to numbers released on Monday by the Ohio State Athletic Commission, Henderson earned a $250,000 flat fee (read: no win bonus needed) for knocking out Rafael “Feijao” Cavalcante to claim the Strikeforce light heavyweight title.

Those of you scoring at home will note that’s a full $60,500 more than all 19 other fighters on the card COMBINED. It also equals each of the official salaries he earned for knocking out Michael Bisping (minus his “KO of the Night” bonus) at the gala UFC 100 and for a decision over Rousimar Palhares at UFC 88, though both those totals included $150,000 win bonuses. Once you consider that he’s making the same money just for showing up in Strikeforce as he was to show up and win in the UFC, that much publicized contract decision must have been kind of a no-brainer for Henderson.

(“Dudes, *tell* me you just saw that!” Props: Esther Lin/Strikeforce)

Add the Strikeforce Light-Heavyweight Championship to the list of MMA’s Great Curses. When Rafael “Feijao” Cavalcante fell victim to Dan Henderson‘s mythical “H-Bomb” right hand last night in Columbus, he became the fourth-consecutive Strikeforce LHW champ to lose the belt without making a single successful defense. (Quick refresher: Babalu Sobral lost it to Gegard Mousasi, who lost it to King Mo, who lost it to Feijao, who lost it Hendo.)

Time will tell if Dan Henderson suffers the same fate. In the meantime, the decorated vet’s arrival as champion helps bolster the 205′ers as a marquee division in Strikeforce. Besides Dan and all the former champions previously mentioned, SF’s light-heavyweight roster now includes guys like Roger Gracie, Mike Kyle, Rhadi Ferguson — tell Fedor Emelianenko to drop 20 pounds, and you’ve got the makings of another great World Grand Prix, especially if their heavyweight tournament continues to run into delays.

(Melvin Manhoef highlight reel, via StillW1ll)

After his decision loss to Ronaldo "Jacare" Souza in August, Strikeforce middleweight contender Tim Kennedy has had quite an adventure finding his next opponent. First, everybody in the world was ducking him. Then, he was slated to have a tie-breaker match with Jason "Mayhem" Miller. Then, Strikeforce decided to nix that idea and put Kennedy up against exciting prospect Luke Rockhold, who has been inactive for a year due to a shoulder injury. Well, that’s off now too. Due to a reported leg injury suffered in training, Rockhold has been forced to withdraw from his meeting with Kennedy at Strikeforce: Feijao vs. Henderson (March 5th; Columbus, OH). Replacing him? None other than balls-to-the-wall striker Melvin Manhoef.

Manhoef has one of the most impressive finishing percentages in MMA, with 23 of his 24 career victories coming by way of KO/TKO. However, he’s lost four of his last six fights — three by way of submission, and one by Hail Mary KO at the hands of Robbie Lawler. Manhoef last competed at Dream.15 in July, when he lost to Tatsuya Mizuno by kimura. Kennedy’s keys to victory are very simple: Slow the pace down, check (or dodge) Melvin’s brutal leg kicks, and get the fight to the ground as soon as possible. Let’s hope this is the last opponent swap for Kennedy, because we’re actually kind of psyched to see this one go down.

("Hey, I thought you guys said you would call me if you were gonna do anything tonight." PicProps: Fighters Only)

Well, this is only going to fuel more speculation about you know what. As Strikeforce moves to finalize its March 5 card in Columbus (tickets go on sale tomorrow, y’all), the recently postponed rubber match between Jason “Mayhem” Miller and Tim Kennedy has been scrapped entirely, at least for the immediate future. Instead, Kennedy will fight Luke Rockhold, the company announced on Monday via press release. That’s at least some compensation for an already pissed off Kennedy, who went public recently with a list of fighters he said had turned down bouts with him and his complaints that Strikeforce was leaving him to die on the vine from sheer inactivity.

No reason for the change was given, though MMA Junkie quotes PR spokesperson Mike Afromowitz saying (in fairly typical Strikeforce fashion) that “the matchup had never been signed in the first place.” In any case, it appears to complete a four-fight card for the cleverly named “Strikeforce: Columbus,” and essentially leaves Miller without a date. Interesting (but probably coincidence) that this switch goes down less than 48 hours after middleweight champion Jacare Souza successfully defended his crown against Robbie Lawler and longtime Miller crush object Nick Diaz stretched Evangelista “Cyborg” Santos to retain his welterweight belt. Wild speculation, anyone?

(I guess you had to be there. Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.)

Originally slated to go down this month, the long-awaited (at least by us) rubber match between middleweights Jason Miller and Tim Kennedy is now expected for Strikeforce: Columbus, which takes place March 5th at the Nationwide Arena. It’s great news for Kennedy, who has been ducked by everybody in the universe since his decision loss to Ronaldo Souza in August. Miller has won his last two fights, scoring a first-round TKO over local yokel Tim Stout at Strikeforce: Nashville last April, and choking out creaky legend Kazushi Sakuraba at DREAM.16 in September.

For the second year in a row, the UFC has decided not to hold an event during the annual Arnold Sports Festival in Columbus, and Strikeforce is swooping in to take full advantage. Along with Miller/Kennedy, the event is rumored to feature Rafael Cavalcante vs. Dan Henderson in the main event, a 135-pound women’s title fight between Marloes Coenen and Miesha Tate, the possible return of Paul Daley, and maybe (maybe!) even Werdum vs. Overeem. 

Speaking of Jason Miller, did you know that he once fought a 360-pound man at an Icon Sport event, and held onto a choke for so long that even Babalu Sobral would be disgusted? I just learned that over the weekend, and I’m still confused. Video proof after the jump…

(This is, like, the only bag in the gym that would agree to be kicked by Tim Kennedy. PicProps: MilitaryTimes.com)

About a month ago we brought you news that bonafide badass Tim Kennedy was having a tough time finding an opponent in Strikeforce’s 185-pound division. Well, as of this writing Kennedy has been out of action nearly five months and with nothing yet scheduled he apparently got so fed up with waiting that this week he decided to say "fuck it" and start naming names. Dig this interview with MMAFA.tv, where Kennedy alleges that nearly every middleweight in Strikeforce has said “thanks, but no thanks” to a meeting in the cage with him during the last few months.

“It’s absolutely atrocious,” Kennedy says. “Strikeforce approached me for the December and January card. I said, ‘Definitely, just give me a name and I’ll take the fight.’ Benji Radach was the name, I said yes. Then they tell me he doesn’t want to fight me. Joey Villasenor was another name, but I understand him saying no because we trained at Jackson’s (team) together. Matt Lindland was another guy who said no. Robbie Lawler has turned me down three or maybe four times. They asked Melvin Manhoef to fight me and he said ‘(expletive) no.’ ”

(Hopefully somebody Rangers Up soon.)

According to a report from FiveOuncesofPain.com, Strikeforce middleweight contender Tim Kennedy is having a hell of a time finding an opponent for his next fight.

The 12-3 retired Army Ranger who last fought and lost by decision to Ronaldo "Jacare" Souza for the Strikeforce middleweight strap four months ago was offered two opponents for last weekend’s Strikeforce: Henderson vs. Babalu event, but both declined the fight, leaving Kennedy in the lurch.

“I said yes to two different names for the December 4th card but both guys turned down the fight,” Kennedy explained. Though the humble 31-year old did not reveal names, he did explain he’s being proactive about the situation – a quality [that] likely serv[ed] him well throughout his decorated military career.

(We should all be that fired up, at least once in our lives. Props: UFC.com)

When BJ Penn knocked out Matt Hughes at UFC 123, one of the greatest rivalries in MMA history finally got its conclusion. And while not every two-fight series needs an immediate tie-breaker — the Internet has already informed Dana White what we think of Lesnar vs. Mir III — there’s something incredibly dramatic and satisfying about a good rubber-match. Off the top of our heads, here’s a few others we’d like to see…

Jason "Mayhem" Miller vs. Tim Kennedy

History: Kennedy def. Miller via decision @ Extreme Challenge 50 (2/23/03), Miller def. Kennedy via decision @ HDNet Fights: Reckless Abandon (12/15/07)
Why it needs to happen again: Look, I’m not going to hold my breath waiting for Jason Miller to agree to a catchweight fight with Nick Diaz under 185 pounds. Mayhem hasn’t even fought for Strikeforce since he squashed Tim Stout in April, and Kennedy is still without an opponent himself after dropping a decision to Jacare Souza in August — and he’s already mentioned that he wants another go-round with Mayhem. Strikeforce has two talented, unattached middleweights at their disposal with a storyline already in place. It doesn’t take rocket appliances to figure this out, guys.

(King Mo was skeptical about looking into the strange man’s pinhole projector, but eventually his curiosity about seeing a total eclipse of the sun got the better of him. PicProps: Strikeforce)

Aside from the hapless Jorge Gurgel – who has lived in the States so long his nationality could most accurately be listed as “Ohioan,” anyway – Saturday night’s Strikeforce: Houston card couldn’t have gone much better for the promotion’s Brazilian contingent. From Rafael "Feijao" Cavalcante stopping Muhammed Lawal to claim the light heavyweight title in the main event to  Ronaldo "Jacare" Souza winning the 185-pound strap after a fight with Tim Kennedy that wasn’t really as close as a lot of people are trying to allege, Brazil pretty much owned everybody’s asses last night.  Again.

In unrelated news, Bobby Lashley lost to some guy whose sideburns made him look like he should be playing trombone in a third-wave ska band. All of our deepest fears and darkest suspicions about the former pro-wrestler’s heart and MMA skills were confirmed. Goddamn it felt good.

Somewhere, whatever notes Scott Coker had scribbled on the back of a Motel 6 brochure about the future of his company probably got crumpled up and tossed in a trash can.

(Focused and ready for battle, King Mo stares into his opponent’s eyes, desperately trying to remember who the hell this dude is. Photo courtesy of allelbows.com)

Two title fights in the light-heavyweight and middleweight divisions, a lightweight slugfest between KJ Noons and Jorge Gurgel, and Bobby Lashley‘s latest bit of record-padding, all brought to you by the world-famous City of Syrup. Let’s be real — if you’re not watching Strikeforce tonight, you’re a damn fool. Or, you don’t have Showtime. Or, you have better things to do. Speaking of which, your usual live-bloggers are occupied tonight, so respected CagePotato contributor Matt Kaplan will be filling in. Round-by-round updates can be found after the jump, beginning at 10 p.m. ET. Refresh the page for all the latest, and let your voices be heard in the comments section. 
 

("Actually, Bobby is the one who’s adopted. Long story." Photo courtesy of allelbows.)

Clear your schedules, Potato Nation. CagePotato.com will be liveblogging tomorrow night’s Showtime broadcast of Strikeforce: Houston starting at 10 p.m. ET, so be sure to stop by. The fighters just stepped on the scales at the Toyota Center, and 86% of them were able to successfully hit their marks. Pretty impressive, guys! The numbers are below:

Main Card
Muhammed "King Mo" Lawal (203.75) vs. Rafael "Feijao" Cavalcante (203.5)
Tim Kennedy (185) vs. Ronaldo "Jacare" Souza (184.75)
K.J. Noons (156.25)* vs. Jorge Gurgel (154.75)
Bobby Lashley (246.5) vs. Chad Griggs (228.5)

Preliminary Card
Daniel Cormier (249) vs. Jason Riley (256.5)
Andre Galvao (170.75) vs. Jorge Patino ()**
Vinicius "Draculino" Magalhães (144.5) vs. Rocky Long (146.25)
Kier Gooch (155.5) vs. Adam Schindler (155.5)
Jose Santibanez (154.25) vs. Reynaldo Trujillo (155.25)
Humberto DeLeon (127.25) vs. Chad Robichaux (131)***
Chad Cook (205.25) vs. Arteneus Young (204)

* Gurgel allowed Noons the extra quarter-pound; Noons will not have to shed the additional weight.
** Wasn’t present at the weigh-ins; will weigh-in later this evening.
*** Was given an extra hour to lose one pound for the 130-pound catchweight bout.

Unrelated: You have the rest of the weekend to get in your final submissions for our ongoing desktop wallpaper contest with Throwdown. The entries have been awesome so far — but we want MORE! So get hustlin’ for your chance to win that $250 gear package.