french girls selfie selfies drawings
Here's What Happens When Strangers Draw Your Selfies

Tag: Tito Ortiz

Four UFC PPV Main Events That Were Worse Than Rampage vs. Ortiz


(For ten years, Rampage has been haunted by the memory of that brutal photo-bombing. And on November 2nd, he’ll have his revenge. Bellator 106: Bitter Homeboys, only on pay-per-view.)

By Matt Saccaro

The announcement of Bellator’s inaugural pay-per-view was met with almost-universal criticism in the MMA world. And with good reason. Tito Ortiz vs. Quinton “Rampage” Jackson would have been a terrible main event in 2009, let alone 2013. But with the way people have been mocking it, you’d think that it was the first time a major MMA promotion had a bad fight main eventing a PPV.

This, of course, isn’t the case. The UFC has put on several PPVs whose main events rival Rampage-Ortiz in outright shittyness. For some reason, those PPVs didn’t draw the media’s collective derision like Rampage-Ortiz did. (It’s almost as if the mainstream MMA media is being coerced by some powerful, credential-wielding force…) But that’s OK; CagePotato is here to bring those terrible main events to justice.

So just what has the UFC given us to watch on Saturday nights that was as bad as the upcoming Rampage-Ortiz train wreck? Let’s have a look.

UFC 106: Tito Ortiz vs. Forrest Griffin II

Cracked skull vs. Xanax-laden stupor.

People might not agree with this pick, but Ortiz-Griffin II was an awful main event. By 2009, Ortiz wasn’t important enough to pay for — no matter who he was fighting. Going into the fight with Forrest Griffin, he was 1-2-1 in his last four fights, with his only win coming against Ken Shamrock in 2006. Tito’s best days were far behind him. In fact, he hadn’t beaten anyone NOT named Ken Shamrock since 2006 (and, coincidentally, it was Forrest Griffin who he beat).

Griffin, too, had whatever the opposite of “a head of steam” is going into UFC 106. Rashad Evans embarrassed him at UFC 92, taking the light heavyweight belt in the process. But what Evans did to him seemed tame compared to the legendary beat down that Anderson Silva bestowed on Griffin at UFC 101.

Put these ruts together and you get an overpriced PPV — $60 to watch two guys who would never be relevant again.

Read More DIGG THIS

Recapping the Most Notable/Embarrassing Moments From the ‘Rampage vs. Tito’ Press Conference


(Our favorite moment? The six seconds of lead-in music that was apparently played on a phonograph. Bellator truly spared no expense.) 

Ugh.

We don’t mean to keep hating on Bellator’s Rampage Jackson/Tito Ortiz/MMA/TNA clusterfuck, but literally everything about this matchup has been equal parts humiliating and downright laughable from the get-go. A botched head fake to cap off a horrendously overdramatized staredown? Check. Straight up goofy forays into the world of pro wrasslin’? Oh, BellaTNAor’s got that in spades.

Which brings us to today’s press conference, an hour-long suckfest in which Bjorn Rebney dutifully tried to convince us that he was both a tried and true MMA fan and honestly excited about the prospect of watching the two half-asleep gentlemen sitting on either side of him fight in the near future. He tried, dammit.

Being that your time is way too valuable to spend an hour of it watching Rebney stroke two former champions egos to full completion while they both push their newfound love of the sport on us like a Ronco Rotisserie, we’ve recapped some most notable moments from yesterday’s press conference after the jump.

Read More DIGG THIS

Friday Link Dump: Tito Ortiz Does the Pro-Wrestling Crossover Thing, Maia vs. Shields on Deck, Ronda Rousey Scolds a Jackass Fan + More


(Now that is one athletic, explosive white man. Props: OfficialGSP via Reddit_MMA)

Tito Ortiz Repeats Surprise Entrance in Pro Wrestling; Fans Not Impressed (MMAFighting)

Chael Sonnen’s TRT Exemption Not a Done Deal in Massachusetts (BleacherReport)

Demian Maia vs. Jake Shields Targeted For Fall Card (FightDay)

Association of Boxing Commissions Addresses Knees to Self-Grounded Fighters (Sherdog)

Video: Ronda Rousey Blasts Fan for Asking Inappropriate Sexually-Charged Question (MMAMania)

UFC 163′s Ian McCall Offers Advice to ‘Dork’ Johnson: ‘Be Cooler’ (MMAJunkie)

Tim Kennedy Wants Wanderlei, ‘Wasn’t Thrilled’ About Fighting Belfort in Brazil (BloodyElbow)

The Most Polite Sucker-Punch of All Time (Break)

Diva AJ Lee’s Body Is Slammin’ (MadeMan)

The Best Sports GIFs of July 2013 (Complex)

An Academic Analysis of 7 Iconic Movie Poop Scenes (FilmDrunk)

The Women Available to Alpha, Beta & Omega Males: Where Do You Fit In? (DoubleViking)

Awesome Video: Firefighter Revives Kitten (EgoTV)

Dez Bryant Suing Girl Who Says He’s Into Strap Ons And Getting Peed On (TerezOwens)

Trailer: Elijah Wood Stabs a Bunch of Women in ‘Maniac’ (ReposDelight)

25 Photos of Girls Being Jealous Of Other Girls (WorldWideInterweb)

Why Pot Turns You Into a Slacker (MensFitness)

Read More DIGG THIS

Bellator Announces Rampage Jackson vs. Tito Ortiz for November 2nd PPV Event [OH GOD, NO]

I haven’t watched this evening’s Bellator event yet, so PLEASE NO SPOILERS, but some big, big, terrible news was announced during the broadcast (and via press release). Okay, deep breath. I’m just going to go ahead and say it.

Quinton “Rampage” Jackson and Tito “The Bathroom Mirror-Shot Assassin” Ortiz have been booked to face-off in the main event of Bellator’s first-ever pay-per-view card, which will be held Saturday, November 2nd, at the Long Beach Arena. Some obvious questions come to mind:

- First off, is anybody actually going to pay for this? Bellator hasn’t announced the price they’re seeking for this PPV, but anything over $9.95 is pushing the limits of reality. Bellator’s main selling point has always been the fact that it’s free. Take that away, and you’ve got…well…two broken-down ex-champs who we haven’t cared about since a white man was president. I mean, let’s be real: If this fight was announced in the UFC, you’d roll your eyes. I’m not sure what kind of reaction Bellator was expecting here, but the one they deserve is this one.

- What happens when a cable TV company creates a weird co-promotional relationship between an MMA promotion and a pro-wrestling outfit, and books two longtime friends (one of whom is actually transitioning into pro-wrestling) to “compete” in an “MMA fight”? It all feels a little too cozy. I’m just saying, if I ran a sportsbook, I’d think twice about accepting bets for this one.

- It’s nice to see Bellator following TNA wrestling’s business model of booking has-been talent to fight each other at least six years after anyone gives a shit. Okay, that’s not really a question, so much as a comment that Seth Falvo made to the CagePotato staff over email, but I thought it was worth sharing.

- Does Bjorn Rebney have any say in this company anymore?

- What other throwback fights will be on the undercard? Frank Shamrock vs. Ken Shamrock? Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior vs. The Iron Sheik (steel cage match)? Zimmer vs. Martinez 2?

After the jump: Some depressing quotes from the press release, and the first official poster…

Read More DIGG THIS

MMA Fail of the Year Candidate #3: Dude Does a Tito Ortiz “Grave Digger” Celebration and the Stockton Taunt Before Getting KTFO


(Go ahead and turn off your speakers for this one.) 

Well here it is, folks. The hands down greatest MMA fail of the year.

It’s kind of a shame, really. There’s so much time left in 2013, yet who in their right mind is going to even attempt to pull off a more embarrassing feat in the cage than the gentleman above? There is so much fail involved in this video that we’re almost certain it was a self-parody gone horribly awry.

Example #1: Dude has the audacity to do a Tito Ortiz “Grave Digger” celebration PRE-FIGHT. While wearing headgear. With the grace of a young Natalia Makarova. Bonus points for flare.

Example #2: Dude is arrogant enough to celebrate pre-fight, yet self-conscious enough to don Under Armour during the actual fight.

Example #3: Dude does the Stockton “Come at me bro” taunt BEFORE A PUNCH HAS EVEN BEEN THROWN.

Example #4: Dude drops his hands and dares his opponent to knock him out.

Example #5: SAY GOODNIGHT.

Fin.

-J. Jones

Read More DIGG THIS

[VIDEO] The Behind the Scenes Footage of “Cyborg” Santos at Invicta 6 Is as Horrifying as You Would Expect It to Be

Oh, you thought Cris “Cyborg” Santos was a terrifying killing machine simply based on her destruction of every woman put before her over the years? Well if you haven’t witnessed her backstage ritual before one such destruction, you don’t yet know true fear.

Watching “Cyborg” punch, knee and slam opponents in the cage is scary enough but seeing her gleefully prance and atonally sing to psych herself up for it is downright eerie. It’s like watching Fedor play cards backstage before knocking someone out or watching Wanderlei Silva smile and bounce to techno music before disemboweling an opponent.

There are killers and then there are natural-born killers. Watch the behind-the-scenes video we’ve placed above to see a natural-born killer flip that switch on and off and, in between, brutalize the game Marloes Coenen at Invicta 6. Then plug in your Dutch Schaefer night light and pray to your God that you never cross this woman in a dark alleyway. Or at a Curves. Or at an Old Country Buffet when there is only one piece of fried chicken left.

- Elias Cepeda

Read More DIGG THIS

Is it Possible to Fix The UFC Hall of Fame Induction Process?


(Well? Photo courtesy of Getty Images.)

By the time that this is published, the ceremony that will make Stephan Bonnar an official member of the UFC Hall of Fame will be underway. Bonnar’s resume includes an 8-7 UFC record, a flawless 0-0 record in UFC title fights, two failed drug tests and the significance of his TUF Finale bout against Forrest Griffin – a fight so important to UFC history that it has its own Wikipedia page. Bonnar also is on good terms with Dana White, which is arguably the most important criterion for induction into what is supposedly the UFC’s highest honor.

Regardless of how you feel about Bonnar’s induction, that last sentence should make you feel uncomfortable. A company that already has trouble convincing non-fans that it isn’t glorified professional wrestling selects people into its hall of fame the same way that the WWE does – by allowing one person to dictate who is worthy of the honor. Both halls have some debatable inductions. Both halls have some notable omissions. Neither hall is taken seriously by most fans of either sport.

While many articles have been written about how Bonnar’s induction highlights everything that’s wrong with the UFC Hall of Fame selection process, pretty much none of them offered any solutions. Below you’ll find a few suggestions to fix the hall, as well as reasons that they may not work. Let’s start off with the most obvious fix…

Read More DIGG THIS

CagePotato Poll: Which MMA Fighter Had the Hottest Porn Star Girlfriend?


(Contestant 1: Christy Mack. In case you’re new to the Internet, you can see lots more of her on Google or her twitter page. Above image via Ranker)

Earlier this month, Bellator welterweight/retired porn-actor War Machine confirmed that he is in a romantic relationship with Christy Mack, a porn actress with a punk-vibe who has appeared in such flicks as Tattooed Anal Sluts and Trashy. How you react to this news depends a lot on your personal relationship with porn, and specifically with the porn featuring Christy Mack. For the record, Christy seems like a super lady, and we think the tattoo of the tall ship on her back is unique and eye-catching.

So, for those of you who care: Where does War Machine’s romance with Christy Mack rank in the short list of MMA fighters who have dated porn stars? Check out our quick rundown below, then vote in the SurveyMonkey widget at the end of page 2. Results will be collected and perhaps revealed if tomorrow turns out to be a really slow news day.


(Contestant 2: Jayden Jaymes)

Read More DIGG THIS

The 9 Most Pathetic Hooks the UFC Has Used to Draw PPV Buys


(At one point, Jones tried to pull away because he thought the handshake was over, but Chael held on for like a half-second longer. It was, without question, the most challenging moment of Jones’s professional MMA career. / Photo via Getty Images)

By Matt Saccaro

The fight game isn’t just about tatted-up white guys with shaved heads hitting each other in the face. If it were, BodogFIGHT and the IFL would still be alive and kicking. Marketing /Hype/PR is a crucial aspect of the fight business — but it doesn’t always go so well.

There were times when the UFC has had stunning marketing triumphs (the whole “Zuffa created the entire MMA world and if you don’t like it you’re a butthurt Pride fanboy” shtick). But there were also times when the UFC’s efforts fell flat on their face like Rafael “Feijao” Cavalcante against Dan Henderson.

What were some of these hyped-up but obviously bullshit moments? Let’s have a look…

1. Watch Che Mills, the Unstoppable Killing Machine!


(Source: Getty)

UFC 145’s main event of Jon Jones vs. Rashad Evans was strong enough to sell a pay-per-view on. Sure, sometimes the promo made the two fighters look like jilted lovers, but we’re not gonna hate on the UFC for hyping up a title fight.

We will, however, hate on them for trying to convince fans that a squash match — Rory MacDonald vs. Che Mills — was some kind of epic duel between two young lions. There was only one prospect in that fight, and it wasn’t Che Mills.

The UFC’s inability to do anything with subtlety ruined the promos for this event, the prelims for this event, and most of the PPV portion of this event. Describing Mills as a “new, dangerous welterweight from the UK” was a gross exaggeration. The British striker was only dangerous if you were a TUF bum or if you suffered an accidental knee injury while fighting him.

During the prelims, Rogan was doing the hard sell. THIS CHE MILLS GUY IS A KILLER. HE’S A MONSTER. HE’S A BADASS. HE BEHEADED NED STARK. HE SHOT BAMBI’S MOTHER. Insane falsehoods like this littered the broadcast. Rogan didn’t stop the bullshit once the main card started, either.

We got treated with pro-wrestling-level fakeness about how Che Mills was on MacDonald’s level up until MacDonald, predictably, ran through Mills.

Thus, the only thing that got killed at UFC 145 was Mills’s career.

Since then, Mills hasn’t legitimately won a fight, unless you count Duane Ludwig’s freak injury as a legit win. Earlier this month, Mills lost via TKO to Irishman Cathal Pendred (never heard of him either) at a CWFC event in Ireland.

2. James Toney, Bane of MMA Fighters.

Read More DIGG THIS

CagePotato Roundtable #22: What Was the Worst UFC Title Fight of all Time?


(It’s not a UFC fight, but you can’t talk awful title fights without at least referencing Sonnen vs. Filho II. Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Today we’re talking about bad UFC title fights – fights that fizzled out after weeks of hype, bored even the most die-hard fans among us, and left us baffled that the winner was considered the best in his weight class. Since we’re dealing strictly with UFC title fights, notable clunkers like Ruiz vs. Southworth II (Strikeforce), Wiuff vs. Tuchscherer (YAMMA), and Sonnen vs. Filho II (WEC) are ineligible for inclusion. Also, we promise that the only appearance of the name “Ben Askren” in this column lies in this incredibly forced sentence. Read on for our picks, and please, pretty please, send your ideas for future Roundtable topics to tips@cagepotato.com.

Jason Moles

Detroit is known by many names – Motown, Motor City, and Hockey Town to name a few. None of which lend to the idea that the birthplace of the assembly line was also a mecca of mixed martial arts or a place to catch great fights on Saturday. Unfortunately, UFC didn’t care; they took the show to the Great Lakes State in 1996 for UFC 9: Clash of the Titans 2 nonetheless. Ken Shamrock and Michigan native Dan Severn were set to face off for the first world title outside of Japan, the UFC Superfight championship. However, thanks to Senator John McCain, instead seeing an exciting rematch that was sure to cover the canvas in bad blood, fans in attendance and at home watching on PPV were treated to what became known as “The Detroit Dance.” And to this day, it is regarded as one of the worst fights in the history of the sport.

Read More DIGG THIS
CagePotatoMMA