(Aoki/Alvarez 1, from K1 Dynamite 2008. THIS is how men fight.) 

A lot has happened in the four years since Eddie Alvarez was heel-hooked by Shinya Aoki in the first round of their inaugural lightweight championship match back in December of 2008. Aoki has fought a remarkable 13 times since then, picking up notable wins over Marcus Aurelio and Rich Clementi as well as evening the score with DREAM rival Joachim Hansen. He has only gone 1-1 in the States, however, dropping a humiliating unanimous decision to current Strikeforce lightweight champ Gilbert Melendez and notching a quick neck crank submission over Lyle Beerbohm.

Alvarez, on the other hand, went on to become the Bellator lightweight champion after defeating Toby Imada at Bellator 12 in June of ’09, but defended the belt only once in the five fights that succeeded it. We last saw the Philadelphia Fight Factory standout lose said title via fourth round submission in an absolute war with Michael Chandler at Bellator 58 that was my personal pick for 2011′s Fight of the Year.

Well now it seems that these two are destined to collide ONCE AGAIN, in what will surely be…an absolute war (isn’t it funny how you can impersonate Mike Goldberg without even talking?).

(Props, as always, to ZombieProphet over at IronForgesIron.) 

UFC on Fox wasn’t the only event this past weekend to feature a couple quick finishers *snicker* doing what they do best. In fact, an undercard fight from Saturday’s Bellator 57 card was over so fast that it made Dos Santos/Velasquez look like Severn/Shamrock 2.

With 7 of his 8 wins coming within the first round (and 5 of those 7 coming within the first 2 minutes!), Josh Shockley was looking to employ an atypical “jab & jog” type strategy against Eric Moon, but “The Monster” would not be having any of that shit, thank you very much. Moon waited approximately 25 seconds before bull rushing into his first takedown attempt like a drunken frat boy chasing a frisbee that is clearly out of his reach. The problem with such an obviously telegraphed double-leg however, is that it gives someone with even below-average reflexes the time to grab that neck, stuff you in a wooden chest, and have a cocktail party around your rotting corpse.

As soon as Shockley locks in a standing guillotine, Moon quits faster than Kim Kardashian (sorry folks, been holding that one in for a while), giving Shockley the victory in just 35 seconds and nearly erasing the memory of his BFC 36 loss to Toby Imada. Even more impressive is the fact that this was not even Shockley’s quickest victory, which was a 15 second TKO via slam back in 2008.

Join us after the jump for the controversial Sledzion/Solomon fight, and the Van Buren and Bezzera submissions:

If you watch carefully, you can see his Soul flashing a peace sign when it flies out.  (VidProps: Bellator)

If you listened to this week’s edition of the Bum Rush (you did, right?), you know that some of us were really looking forward to Bellator action this weekend, and some of us were unconvinced.  But when guys are pulling off stupid-rare submissions and handing out beatdowns on the weekly, we say those naysayers are just stupid neenerfaces.  You go ahead and contemplate how much time we’re spending with preschool kids while you click the “Read More” link below, then share your comments about just how awesome Bellator is.  Hyperbole and ridiculous analogies will win you style points, and haterific comments will probably inspire ReX13 to bestow an insulting website upon your login.  That asshole is just way too sensitive sometimes.

Yes, this was a lazy choice for the leading picture.  Suck it, Trebek.

Sometimes when major news breaks, there’s news that falls through the cracks.  So while everyone and their brother is talking about middle eastern uprisings, Japanese earthquakes and #tigerblood, can we point out that we’re watching two major MMA organizations initiate their melodramatic death scenes?  If you had Dream/FEG in your office MMA org death pool, well, we compliment your good sense, and sympathize with your loss.

Anyways, with yesterday’s seismic changes in the MMA scene (and if you believe the “business as usual” line, we have a used space shuttle to sell you), it’s possible you forgot about Bellator XXXVI.  This was the kind of show that Bellator built its rep on: an eclectic mix of journeymen and young prospects competing in a field in which your predictions are about as solid as a coin toss, seasoned with the best undercard fights to round out the show.   Bellator continues to stay on the cutting edge of free agent acquisition, and the tournaments are only becoming more compelling.  If you DVR’d the Louisiana show last night, go watch it right now.  Don’t worry, we’ll wait.  If you can’t, you missed a solid card.  Of the seven fights last night, exactly zero went to decision, although the much-requested Spiritwolf-Jara bloodbath from last week did actually make it to the judges. Come on in and we’ll tell you about it, without rubbing it in too much.

(Bellator Savings and Loans? I’m not familiar with that bank, Mr. Curran. We’ll have to put a hold on that check)

By DL “Colorful Prose” Richardson

As the second season of Bellator draws to a close, we get less of the tournament battles and more of the feature bouts and tryout fights. That’s not necessarily a complaint: fighters can put on some captivating performances when there’s a lot on the line, and we’ve seen it already this season. Tonight, the main event is the final of the 155 pound tournament, but there’s considerable buzz around the stateside return of Megumi Fujii. Fujii, who came in at 19-0, is considered one of, if not the, top pound for pound women’s fighters. Bellator rounds out the live show with a heavyweight bout with a potential invitation to next season’s tournament on the line.
Come into my parlor, said the spider to the fly, and I’ll tell you what went down, what I think about it, and the secret ingredient to in El Famous Burritos.

(Props: Bellator.com)

After eight shows and a whole lot of colorful prose from ReX13, Bellator’s second season is entering its climactic Finals stage tomorrow night at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Hollywood, Florida. Headlining Bellator 21 will be the lightweight final between grappling ace Toby Imada — who submitted James Krause and Carey Vanier (both via second-round armbar) to get to the end of the bracket — and Pat Curran, who earned his spot in the finals by knocking out Mike Ricci and scoring an upset decision over Roger Huerta. The winner of the fight will face Bellator lightweight champ Eddie Alvarez later this year.

(The end of the Alvarez/Neer fight, via YouTube.com/BellatorMMA.)

By DL “Tank Abbot” Richardson

Some of Bellator’s biggest names were on the card last night at the Citi Performing Arts Center, for the first-ever major MMA show in Boston. Two semi-final matchups for the lightweight tourney were on tap, plus a 160-pound SuperFight between Eddie Alvarez and Josh Neer, and a heavyweight exhibition featuring one of Brock Lesnar‘s training dummies partners. But not everything went as planned. A full rundown of Bellator 17 is after the jump. Prepare yourselves — some crazy shit went down…

(The gruesome end of Curran vs. Ricci. All four tournament fights from last night’s event ended in stoppages. Video courtesy of YouTube.com/BellatorMMA.)

…are waiting for you after the jump.

(Just look at how much fun Jeremy Shockey and Mickey Rourke had last week, then try and tell us you don’t want to be a part of that.)

It’s another Thursday night in April, which means everyone’s favorite tournament-based MMA promotion is back in action.  Bellator XIV is coming to us from the historic Chicago Theatre tonight, featuring a welterweight tournament bout between Olympic wrestler Ben Askren and Ryan Thomas, as well as a lightweight scrap between inverted triangle choker Toby Imada and James Krause, and a featherweight bout between Wilson Reis and Shad Lierley.  The TV portion of the card kicks off at 7 pm local time and airs live-ish, depending on where you live, on Fox Sports Net, so check your local schedule for details.

While you wait, why not check out last week’s fight between Roger Huerta and Chad Hinton after the jump.

(Props: YouTube.com/BellatorMMA)

Bellator’s long-awaited second season kicks off this Thursday in Hollywood, Florida, featuring Roger Huerta‘s promotional debut against undefeated Cincinnati native Chad Hinton, and Joe Warren‘s debut against Eric Marriott. To promote the tournament series, Bellator has put together preview shows for each of their four weight classes, which originally aired on Fox Sports Network, but have also been made available on YouTube. The lightweight tourney preview covers such participants as Huerta, Toby Imada, Ferrid Kheder, and Mike Ricci, as well as the reigning champion Eddie Alvarez; part one is above, parts two and three are after the jump. To see the featherweight, welterweight, and middleweight episodes, go here.

(Props: SinisterGi.com)

Remember when Toby Imada pulled off that awesome inverted triangle choke in the Bellator tournament last year?  Of course you do.  Your brain isn’t so clogged with Snickers bars and "Golden Girls" reruns that you could go and forget a thing like that.  It was by far the best submission of the year.  Now that we’ve moved on to a new year and Imada no longer has to worry about all you jokers biting his style, he’s going to go ahead and show you how it’s done.  Forget about Blanche and Sophia and the gang for just a few minutes and pay attention.

After the jump, check out round two of Matt Serra‘s video blog, and listen as Don Frye shares a very special memory from the Pride days, just for the hell of it.

10. Tom Lawlor sings CB Dollaway a lullaby

(UFC 100, 7/11/09)

Tom Lawlor was a 2-1 underdog in his bout with C.B. Dollaway at UFC 100. Conventional wisdom said that he’d be an entertaining guy to have on the card prior to the opening horn, but wouldn’t stand much of a chance against Dollaway’s dominant wrestling and smirking self-assurance. The entertaining part turned out to be true. Lawlor painted himself in homage to the infamous Just Bleed Guy for the weigh-in, and then used man-dog Seth Petruzelli as a prop in his entrance. That’s where the fun was supposed to stop, but just seconds into the first round he locked up an arm-in guillotine choke off a Dollaway takedown attempt and held on to it until his opponent’s lip uncurled and his eyes rolled back in his head. Maybe it wasn’t the most technically brilliant move, but he did choke C.B. Dollaway unconscious, which meant we didn’t have to listen to him talk for a little while. That ought to be worth something.

9. Jake Rosholt ruins Chris Leben’s hometown party

(UFC 102, 8/29/09)

UFC 102 in Portland, Oregon was supposed to be Chris Leben’s homecoming. Coming off a long steroid suspension following his loss against Michael Bisping, he drew the relatively inexperienced Jake Rosholt in his return. But early on in the fight it became apparent that Leben came to throw wild, looping bombs, while Rosholt came to fight a mixed martial arts bout. After trading on the feet for a little while Rosholt finally got smart and put Leben on his back long enough to lock up an arm-triangle choke. Leben considered tapping, but didn’t get around to it before his brain called it quits. Somehow, Rosholt got cut after losing his next bout, while Leben still has a job with the UFC. This crazy world.

(Props: youtube.com/BellatorMMA)

Bellator’s inaugural season came to a close on Friday night, with the finals of their middleweight and lightweight brackets. In the 185-pound title fight, Hector Lombard used his striking and ground-and-pound to open up some nasty cuts on the head of his opponent, Jared Hess; the fight was eventually stopped in the fourth round after Hess lost a few gallons of blood. Directly after, 155-pound favorite Eddie Alvarez completed his sweep of the lightweight tourney by knocking Toby Imada out of his jock with a big right hook early in the second round, then sinking in a rear-naked choke. Lombard and Alvarez collected $100,000 checks for their efforts.

In non-tournament action, Jorge Masvidal submitted Eric Reynolds via third-round rear-naked choke, Bodog/ShoXC vet Rosi Sexton submitted Valerie Coolbaugh via first-round armbar, and Stephanie Guimaraes became Bellator’s latest YouTube star with her 49-second knee-knockout of Yvonne Reis. The Guimaraes knockout is above; highlights from the Lombard/Hess and Alvarez/Imada fights are after the jump.

After making my MMA highlight reel debut with "Sakuraba: Survivor," I decided to follow it up with a new compilation that’s both shorter and less depressing. The concept of "Stranglehold" is quite simple: Here are some of the most creative and infamous choke-submissions in recent MMA history, soundtracked by Ted Nugent. The cast of characters include Nate Diaz, Dan Miller, Renato "Babalu" Sobral, Shinya Aoki, BJ Penn, Nick Diaz, Demian Maia, CB Dollaway, and Toby Imada. Let me know what you think, and if you dig it, please share with a friend.

(BG)

(Props: Fightlinker)

As promised, here’s the video of what some are calling the "submission of the decade" — Toby Imada‘s come-from-behind upset victory over Jorge Masvidal at Friday’s Bellator event via inverted mid-air triangle-choke. Enjoy it, because you may not see something like this ever again.

(Yeah, that’s an upside down triangle choke. Props: Watch Kalib Run.)

Maybe the most interesting story to come out of Bellator so far is Toby Imada’s upset of Jorge Masvidal in last night’s Bellator lightweight tournament semi-finals.  Masvidal was reportedly in control for most of the bout, but in the third round a failed takedown attempt led to an upside down triangle choke from Imada against a standing Masvidal.  Masvidal did his best to endure it, but ended up collapsing to the canvas unconscious.  Bellator promises us video of the submission soon, and this ought to be good.  Imada moves on to the finals to face Eddie Alvarez, who was also victorious last night.  Full results are after the jump.