The MMA Minute: post-UFC 107 edition – Watch more Funny Videos

As part of our continuing effort to please our illiterate fanbase while simultaneously infuriating those of you who read Cage Potato in quiet work environments, we present "The MMA Minute."  It’s a brief rundown of the weekend that was in mixed martial arts, telling you nothing you didn’t already know if you actually watched the fights, but telling you that nothing in the wry, almost witty manner you’ve come to expect from this site.  Think of it as a minute and forty-five seconds of your life that you’ll never get back.  Ever. 

Also, there’s a cat in it, though any resemblance that cat may have to the one that went missing from the house down the street from mine is purely incidental.  That little girl can cry and put up all the posters she wants, it’s not going to change my position on the matter.

(Diego, we don’t want to embarrass you or anything, but, well, your brain is showing. Photo courtesy of Fight Magazine’s UFC 107 gallery.)

The results from UFC 107 are in and the numbers have all been tallied up. And don’t worry, after concerns arose that some of our stats had been poorly calculated, we hired some real experts: the dudes who counted all the votes in the most recent election in Afghanistan. See, they’ve got real world experience!

Join us to see who’s up, who’s down, and who made little progress in either direction after UFC 107, all according to the arbitrary numerical rankings system of the Potato Index.

B.J. Penn +193
What kind of champion goes five rounds with the number one contender to his title and only gets hit eight times? The thoroughly dominant kind. Penn is without question the world’s best lightweight right now, but that doesn’t mean he has to jump divisions right away. Stick around, beat up Gray Maynard, issue a few futile challenges to Shinya Aoki, then go. You’ll have our blessing.

Diego Sanchez -12
On Saturday night we learned that Sanchez isn’t really in Penn’s league (which we already knew, or at least suspected), but he is one of the toughest SOB’s in MMA at any weight class. One gets the sense that if the doctor hadn’t stopped it, he would have kept going all night. Fortunately for his face, it doesn’t work like that.

(Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Following his four-round drubbing at the hands of Georges St. Pierre at UFC 94, the general consensus was that BJ Penn should return to the 155-pound division for good, and give up his pipe-dream of becoming the UFC’s welterweight champion. Penn did return to lightweight competition, and went on to completely demolish the division’s two top contenders, Kenny Florian and Diego Sanchez. He now finds himself in same position as his nemesis GSP, where no challenger to his title seems quite worthy enough. So will we be seeing the Prodigy make another run at welterweight next year? Dana White lays it out:

Gray Maynard and Frankie Edgar are among the names of lightweight fighters who have enjoyed great success recently, and could be tapped as Penn’s next opponent. But good luck selling them as actual threats to the belt. If the UFC’s main-event-drought continues, they might be better off using Penn for exhibitions against tough welterweights like Josh Koscheck, Jon Fitch, or Thiago Alves — at least until an undisputed #1 lightweight contender emerges. Few people are clamoring for Penn/GSP III at this point, but I think we all want to see Penn get an even greater challenge his next time out, even if it takes him out of his most effective weight class.

(Wilson Gouveia [in the Brazilian shorts] and Alan Belcher [in the Fairyland shorts] slug it out at UFC 107. Photo courtesy of MMA Fanhouse.)

Despite some thrilling moments in UFC 107‘s main card, the UFC awarded all of its traditional end-of-night bonuses to preliminary card fighters. Scoring the $65,000 pay bumps were…

Knockout of the Night: TJ Grant, for wrecking Kevin Burns with a right hook in the closing seconds of their one-rounder, which kicked off the prelims.

Submission of the Night: DaMarques Johnson, who upkicked the wits out of Edgar Garcia, then quickly finished him with a triangle choke in the first round of their fight. The memorable sequence — which was shown at the end of the pay-per-view broadcast — occurred shortly after Johnson was punched to the mat.

Fight of the Night: Alan Belcher vs. Wilson Gouveia, which also made it to the PPV broadcast. Though their match was the second-shortest of the night, it was a fast-paced striking war that ended with Gouveia crumpling under Belcher’s onslaught. And really, are you going to give it to Clay Guida three fights in a row? You know he’ll just blow it all on shampoo and energy drinks…

(Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

If you watched last night’s UFC event, you already know that BJ Penn vs. Diego Sanchez was one of the most lopsided five-round fights in UFC history. But exactly how bad did things get for the hapless challenger? According to FightMetric, Sanchez threw 108 strikes at Penn, and only landed eight of them. Seriously. Eight, the whole fight. That’s a 7% success rate. By comparison, Penn was able to touch Sanchez 150 times out of 214 tries, for a remarkable 70% success rate. Compounding his failure, Sanchez also went 0/24 on his takedown attempts. (Fun fact: Penn hasn’t been successfully taken down by a lightweight since Takanori Gomi, six years ago. But hey, kudos to Sanchez for trying anyway.)

Of course, you could also just look at the above photo to understand what a bad situation the Nightmare found himself in at the FedExForum. Allow Dana White to explain what you’re looking at:

After the jump: A completely unmarked BJ Penn discusses his victory.

(‘Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world.  Took the midnight train going n-e-where…’)

Diego Sanchez knows how to work a crowd into a frenzy using Journey lyrics, but does he have what it takes to win a UFC championship?  We’ll know soon enough, just like we’ll figure out whether Frank Mir’s swollen physique translates into victory or just large-scale embarrassment.  Either way, should be a good time.  We’ll be liveblogging all the action from start to finish, complete with misspellings, snap judgments, and fairly obvious comedic remarks.  Won’t you join us?

The action kicks off after the jump.  Remember to hit refresh often to stay current.

(Where’s a chaperone when you need one?)

Preliminary results from UFC 107 in Memphis, TN await you after the jump.  If you need someone to tell you that these may be spoilers, you should probably go ahead and let yourself freeze to death outside the Greyhound station right now.  No one will miss you.

You know how you can tell that Diego Sanchez‘s eccentricity is not an act?  Skip to the 3:10 mark of Dana White’s weigh-in video blog and watch him psyching himself up before he gets on the scales.  Dude is still more than twenty-four hours away from the fight itself at this point, but there he is, gently swaying back and forth while shouting ‘Yes!’ to himself, oblivious to the presence of any other human beings.  Normal people — even normal people who get really into the vague platitudes of Tony Robbins — would probably choose to play it a little closer to the vest.  Maybe they’d just think ‘Yes!’ over and over to themselves, or perhaps mutter it very softly.  Not Diego.  Probably because being embarrassed of his own actions has never even occurred to him.

Also worth noting here is one of B.J. Penn‘s cornermen, who stands just behind Sanchez as he works himself into a frenzy, and at one point glances back at Penn as if to say, ‘You seeing this?’  And yeah, Penn sees it and seems thoroughly unimpressed.  I can’t wait to see who wins the race to the center of the Octagon. 

(Frank Mir pauses a moment to flex his biceps and think about his childhood. Photo courtesy of Fight Magazine’s excellent UFC 107 weigh-in gallery.)

When Frank Mir has let his weight get into the 260′s in the past, it hasn’t typically been extra muscle tipping the scales.  Not unless that extra muscle was strategically hidden under layers of gut.  It’s no secret that he hates doing cardio, is prone to bouts of crippling depression, and he’s more than six years removed from the chiseled young Adonis who appeared on the cover of Muscle & Fitness.  But for UFC 107 Mir weighed in at a bulky 264.5 pounds, and for perhaps the first time in his career it was not a sign that he’s been letting himself go.

Quite the contrary, in fact.  Mir got with former Strongman Mark Phillipi and did a serious lifting routine to bulk up for this fight.  Now he seems pretty sure that he won’t get tossed around by the bigger heavyweights in the division, especially guys whose names rhyme with Lock Festner, but has he sacrificed any quickness and agility in the process?  The extra weight might really help against a corn-fed wrestler, but against a lanky French striker it could be more of a liability.  

What say you, Potato Nation?  Is this just one more sign that Mir is looking past Kongo and on to Lesnar? 

(‘Kongo, I don’t respect your ground game and don’t particularly like you as a person, so you know I have no reason to lie to you when I say this, but your ass is the most magnificent thing I’ve ever encountered.’ Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle’s UFC 107 weigh-in set.)

Who knows what kind of wacky scales they use in Memphis, but Natasha Wicks isn’t complaining because the end result was six different fighters stripping down to their birthday suits just to make weight.  Diego Sanchez initially weighed in at 156, which would have been just fine if he weren’t fighting for the 155-pound title.  So he did what several others who came before him did and took off his skivvies to make weight.  When he did, he clocked in at 154.5 pounds.  As Tennessee State Athletic Commission executive director/master of basic reasoning skills Tim Mullen explained: "Every fighter that was taking his shorts off was losing about 1.5 pounds, that must be what those things weigh."

With the help of a little nudity every fighter made the agreed upon weight, although the Alan Belcher-Wilson Gouveia bout was changed to a catchweight of 195 pounds before the weigh-in.  Full results are after the jump.

(Slightly bored versus uncomfortably intense. Who ya got? Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle’s UFC 107 press conference set.)

With UFC 107 (which we’ll be liveblogging) set to rock Memphis, Tennessee’s precious little world on Saturday night, we take a moment to argue over who’s going to be wearing gold when the night is over, who’s got a championship in their future, and what the UFC should do about future events that get crappier with every news cycle.

Is Diego Sanchez going be the toughest challenger BJ Penn has ever faced as UFC lightweight champ? How do you see that fight going?

BF: I definitely think Sanchez is the toughest lightweight challenger Penn has faced, but that’s not saying all that much. Much of his career has been spent fighting bigger guys like Georges St. Pierre and Matt Hughes. The two times he has defended his title since beating Joe Stevenson for it, he fought Sean Sherk and Kenny Florian. Sherk basically took himself out of the fight by trying to outbox Penn, despite his T-Rex arms, and Florian just didn’t have anything with which to threaten him. Sanchez is better on the feet than both those guys, and he’s also more aggressive and harder to hurt.

(Photo courtesy of myspace.com/rudyvhawaii)

By CagePotato.com contributor Elias Cepeda

The feelings behind BJ Penn’s notorious “gameface,” used to run deep. In the days and hours leading up to his fights he could be as dour and tense as his expression, and the anxiousness continued even as he ran to the Octagon to fight, a bundle of nervous energy.

But just before his UFC lightweight title defense last August in Philadelphia against top contender Kenny Florian, Penn’s head trainer Rudy Valentino saw a change in his fighter. “Just before we got out of the arena he was laughing and talking about, ‘I’m going to enjoy this fight, I’m going to go out and enjoy every fight from now on,’” the coach told CagePotato from Memphis, where Penn (14-5-1) will face Diego Sanchez (23-2) on Saturday night at UFC 107.

“That night BJ was just fighting to fight. It was the Florian fight where he began to turn it on.”

The idea that Penn may just now beginning to find his groove, mentally, is a scary one. Especially if his violent dismantling of Florian that night is any indication of what a more relaxed “Prodigy” can do.

(Props: BuySilverStar.com)

Following the Hoelzer Reich fiasco, it’s refreshing to see an MMA t-shirt sponsor that actually gets it right. Sure, there’s a skull in Clay Guida‘s new "Run to the Hills" tee ($40) from Silver Star — which the Carpenter will be wearing during his cage-entrance at UFC 107 — and yes, the skull thing has already been beaten into the ground. But as any metal fan could tell you, that skull belongs to Iron Maiden mascot Eddie the Head. Maybe you would appreciate this more if you had just been listening to "The Trooper" before you saw this. Or maybe you’d be more interested in some of the other signature tees that will be on display this Saturday…

That’s B.J. Penn hitting some mitts at the UFC 107 open workout, and all we can say is, daaaaamn!  We all know that Penn’s boxing skills have come a long way in the last few years, but this gives you a good idea of just how fast his hands are these days.  And yeah, we realize that it’s one thing to look great hitting pads and quite another to do it with a real live crazy person trying to hit you back, but this is still an impressive display from the lightweight champ.  If Diego Sanchez is going to threaten him on the feet, it seems like he’ll have to do it with the variety and unpredictability of his attack, rather than the sheer speed and power.  Good luck with that.

P.S. If you’re wondering how Penn is relaxing in his down time, check out this video where he sits down to watch the 1986 sci-fi action flick "Eliminators," which he describes as "the best movie ever."  We scoffed at that claim initially.  I mean, has Penn somehow not seen "Conan the Barbarian"?  But then we found something that made us rethink that position…

(Do yourself a favor, skip to the 4:15 mark to see Ariel Helwani ask Diego Sanchez about the Yes! Cartwheel.  It’s all cool until Helwani asks him to do it, and then it is suddenly not cool at all.)

Diego Sanchez believes it is his destiny to become a UFC champion, though there are a lot of other guys who think the same thing and will never get there.  What’s the difference between them and Diego?  A positive attitude and a willingness to look directly into the camera even when being interviewed by someone who is standing right next to him.  In other news around the MMA world:

- Paul Daley’s rant about what a "big pussy" Carlos Condit is turned out to be oddly prescient, as the UFC has reportedly decided to give him Dustin Hazelett at UFC 108, as Daley suggested.  Hazelett got screwed out of his fight at UFC 106 when Karo Parisyan threw away his career pulled out of the bout, and now the submissions ace gets what is likely to be an easier style match-up against Daley.  Provided, that is, that he can get him to the mat.

(Props: Wotan420 via CageWriter)

Thanks to the Internet, MMA fighters have the ability to see what part of their persona is being obsessed over by their fans, and tweak it to draw a reaction. We saw this previously with Fedor Emelianenko, who found out that his sweater had become mythical, so he did a TV interview wearing a Daffy Duck pullover in order to test our loyalty. In the same way, Diego Sanchez‘s infamous "Yes!" cage-entrance has become such a "thing" now that he’s performing variations of it for our amusement. The above footage came from last night’s Countdown to UFC 107 special on Spike, and it kind of makes you wonder how much of the Nightmare’s craziness is intentionally calculated. Is he making fun of his own quirkiness by Yes!ing in cartwheel form, or is he completely oblivious to how weird this looks?

And by the way, can a person really invent something like the Yes Cartwheel? It’s like, hey, I’m doing pushups while shouting "yes!" so I invented the Yes Pushup. Or, I’m riding the subway with my pants around my ankles, so I invented the Yes Subway Ride. I could do this all day. And I would, but I have a train to catch.

After the jump: Sanchez’s sane-by-comparison opponent BJ Penn cuts a promo for his favorite sponsor RVCA, which he might be illegally wearing on Saturday night.

UFC 107 Gambling Enabler – Watch more Funny Videos

Some people say that there’s nothing worthwhile you can accomplish with one camera, two untrained actors, and very little in the way of budget or professional lighting equipment. We say those people are a bunch of negative jerks who probably hate themselves and smell really bad. In the name of trying something a little different, we produced a video version of our old “Gambling Addiction Enabler” for UFC 107. We mainly did this because our latest research suggests that many of you are functionally illiterate, but also because we thought it would be fun. We were right. On both counts.

Enjoy our first effort at this. We can only get better.

(Lucio Linhares highlight reel courtesy of norja01.)

Tucked away on the preliminary card of UFC 107 this Saturday will be two promising Brazilian up-and-comers, trying to make their names on MMA’s greatest stage. Will they prove that they belong there, or will they just be more chum for the Octagon’s sharks? Let’s meet ‘em…

LUCIO LINHARES (MW)
Experience: 13-4 record, with multiple appearances in M-1 Challenge and Finland’s Fight Festival organization. Is currently on a five-fight win streak, with all wins by stoppage and notable victories over Karl Amoussou and Sean Salmon.
Will be facing: Rousimar Palhares (9-2, 2-1 UFC)
Lowdown: A native of Ipatinga, Brazil, the 36-year-old Linhares grew up studying a variety of martial arts including kung fu and capoeira before discovering jiu-jitsu. Now, "the gentle art" is how Spartan makes his living. Linhares is highly-regarded as a BJJ instructor, and his annual seminars in Finland have garnered him the unofficial title of "Godfather of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu in Finland." (He also competed in the M-1 Challenge as a ringer for Team Finland.) Though Linhares’s start in MMA came relatively late in life, he’s enjoyed great success recently thanks to an improving stand-up game. He describes Palhares as "my hardest opponent to date." However: "I know I have a good Brazilian jiu-jitsu and I am confident to face anyone in the UFC because this is the moment of truth for me."

Jon Fitch spoke to Fight Magazine in advance of his bout with Mike Pierce at UFC 107 this weekend, and he’s got news for all you haters out there: Fitch doesn’t like it when fights go to a decision, either.  That might seem counterintuitive, since his last five fights have ended in decisions.  In fact, you have to go all the way back to his 2007 fight against Roan Carneiro to see Fitch finish a fight.  But as he points out in his own defense, finishing dudes in the UFC isn’t easy.  Being a wrestler without KO power or a high-level submissions game probably doesn’t help any, but still. 

After the jump, Diego Sanchez is as pumped as ever in his latest video blog, while B.J. Penn is already in Memphis and sounding like he might be coming down with something.  Quick B.J., do one of Diego’s foot detox baths!  It’s your only hope!!!!

(With no one around to tell him how to train, Buentello just guesses what a workout might look like based on what he’s seen on late-night infomercials.)

Paul Buentello is set to make his UFC return this Saturday night against Stefan Struve, but he’ll be doing so without the support of the boys down at the American Kickboxing Academy.  That’s because Buentello has been suspended from the San Jose, California gym due to his decision to hire someone other than AKA’s Bob Cook as his manager.  As he told Fight Magazine:

“I’m on suspension. I think Bob [Cook] has most control of it, letting me back in the gym. … I’ve always came to this crossroads, if I ever go back to the UFC, I gotta have somebody on board that’s gonna sell me like I’m the best thing since sliced bread,” said Buentello. The native Texan believes that someone is Elis Pacheco of New York-based Dedos Marketing Group, which has worked with Ice-T, Fat Joe and Beyonce Knowles.

[…]

We told you Diego Sanchez was a little bit weird, but you just wouldn’t believe us.  Maybe you’ll change your mind once you see his pre-UFC 107 video blog, in which he plays with an iguana to help his reflexes.  Not that we don’t respect his positive attitude.  I mean, the guy’s car breaks down on the side of the road and he breaks into song.  Although it’s still unclear how he turned that particular negative into a positive.  From what we can tell, it was pretty much all negative.  Sure, he got a ride in someone else’s Toyota Yaris, but those of us who have driven a Yaris know damn well that it’s basically one step up from those Flintstones cars, if that.  At least those things looked heavy enough that you didn’t have to worry about a strong wind sweeping you off the road.

After the jump, we give equal time to some of B.J. Penn‘s annoying thirty second videos.   Because editing stuff together is for haoles, bra.

In his recent fights UFC lightweight champ B.J. Penn has fallen into a pattern of making it personal with his opponents before the bout, then embracing them like old friends once he’s beaten them up.  In this video he says he wanted to feed Kenny Florian some extra elbow strikes for making him look like a fool and a liar in the media, because "that’s what I felt he deserved."  This assertion casts Penn as not only the dominant lightweight champ, but also as a sort of avenging angel of justice in his fights.  He’s not just thinking about winning in there; that’s a foregone conclusion.  He’s taking into account your past deeds and considering how much punishment you deserve, which is kind of disturbing and also kind of awesome.

As for Diego Sanchez, Penn may let him off with just a loss.  He can’t think of anything bad to say about the guy, except that he’s a little strange, which Diego will tell you himself.  The real question here is whether Penn will be in the kind of shape to go five rounds with a human perpetual motion machine like "The Nightmare."  He says it won’t be a problem.  He also says his work ethic has never been an issue.  There’s reason to doubt at least one of those claims.

(Props: YouTube.com/UFC)

The UFC hits Memphis for the first time on December 12th, and even though the card is short an Alves and a Duffee, it’s still going to be an enjoyable night of fights. Headlining the card is BJ Penn’s latest lightweight title defense against Diego Sanchez, who Joe Rogan describes as "crazy in the best way possible." Sanchez already believes that he’s the best 155-pounder in the world, and looks forward to proving it to the rest of us. Penn is only looking to have some fun out there, and live his dream for one more night. "I’m going to race you to the center of that ring, player," Sanchez says. "Feel your legs burning in the third round. Feel your lungs gasping for air, but you don’t get no oxygen. That’s what BJ Penn’s gonna feel come 12/12."

But wait, there’s more. Frank Mir wants Cheick Kongo to know that "he’ll never be the same human being when I get out of that cage with him…when I get a hold of him, it could be the last time he ever gets to compete as an athlete. You’re going to see the difference between a well-rounded martial artist versus a guy who never expanded upon his abilities." Kongo, whose feelings are clearly hurt, warns Mir about his big mouth. And finally, Kenny Florian and Clay Guida look to get back to lightweight contendership following recent high-profile losses. The complete UFC 107 lineup is after the jump; your predictions are appreciated.

(Any man who can come out looking like Frankenstein and laugh it off is okay by us.)

Despite our pleas to see Dutch beanstalk Stefan Struve take on the UFC’s shortest heavyweight in Pat Barry, Struve is now official as the replacement for the injured Todd Duffee against Paul Buentello at UFC 107 in December.  While it’s not the David vs. Goliath fight we were hoping for (Buentello is 6’2", which isn’t funny at all), there’s still the young punk (21-year-old Struve) vs. grizzled old veteran (Buentello’s 35) angle. 

Buentello is returning to the UFC after wins in both of Affliction’s events, first against Gary Goodridge and then against Kiril "Little Fedor on Steroids" Sidelnikov.  The last time Buentello fought in the Octagon was February of 2006, when he beat Gilbert Adana via TKO at UFC 57.  The very next night, on another continent, Struve competed in his fourth pro MMA bout at the "Staredown City" event in Oostzaan, Holland.  He defeated Murat Bourekba via disqualification.  When Buentello made his MMA debut in April of 1997, Struve had just recently celebrated his ninth birthday.  Should be an interesting scrap.       

(Mike Pierce takes Brock Larson for a ride during the "Diaz vs. Guillard" prelims in September. Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Poor Jon Fitch. Two weeks ago he was "So excited!" about his rematch with Thiago Alves, which was set up when his original opponent Ricardo Almeida went down with a knee injury. But Alves soon had to pull out for the same reason, and Fitch is now faced with a nightmare scenario for any top contender — a dangerous opponent with little name-value. As reported by MMA Mania, Fitch will now compete at UFC 107 (December 12th, Memphis) against Mike Pierce, a 10-1 up-and-comer who recently scored a major upset over Brock Larson during his Octagon debut at UFC Fight Night 19. Before he joined the UFC, Pierce toiled in regional promotions where he picked up wins over TUF castmembers Mike Dolce, Mark Miller, and Paul Bradley. He’s currently riding a six-fight win streak.

Obviously, Fitch should take this one; just as he derailed Paulo Thiago‘s hype train at UFC 100 after the Brazilian scored a freak upset against Josh Koscheck, Fitch will probably do the same thing to Pierce, who’s coming off the biggest win of his career. But once again, it’s a fight that doesn’t do much to move him towards another shot at the welterweight belt. Unfortunately, when your opponents are struck down with injuries, and you’ve already had a shot at the champion, and you won’t fight Josh Koscheck and Mike Swick because of your camp affiliation, your options tend to be limited.

(It’s particularly disappointing because Thiago’s face had just returned to normal.)

When it rains, it goddamned pours. The latest big-name UFC fighter to be scratched from an end-of-year card is Thiago Alves, who just went down with a knee injury — most likely a torn posterior cruciate ligament, if you want to get specific. Alves was scheduled to rematch Jon Fitch at UFC 107, and was coming in as a replacement for Ricardo Almeida, who suffered his own knee injury last week. No word yet on how long this will keep Alves sidelined, or if Fitch will be getting a replacement-replacement opponent for the December 12th show in Memphis. Matt Hughes, if there was ever a time to shut AKA’s collective mouth, it’s now. As it stands, UFC 107′s lineup looks like this:

(Fitch vs. Alves, 6/28/06.)

Though we previously eliminated Thiago Alves in our Fitch’s-next-opponent guessing game, it turns out that the Pitbull is a strong frontrunner for Ricardo Almeida‘s replacement. A source close to the UFC told MMA Junkie that Fitch and Alves will meet at UFC 107 (December 12th, Memphis); Alves’s original opponent for the event — Paulo Thiago — will be booked in another match.

Alves is obviously a bigger name than Almeida, but Fitch’s Twitter enthusiasm still threw us off. Who gets psyched about a rematch with a guy you already beat, unless it’s for a title? Reacquaint yourself with Fitch and Alves’s UFC Fight Night 5 scrap above, which starts with Alves having to take out his tongue ring, and ends with a TKO victory for Fitch at the end of the second-round thanks to a well-placed upkick.

"That was an appetizer, Dana. Let me eat."

So said undefeated American Top Team prospect Todd Duffee after his seven-second storming of Tim Hague at UFC 102. It was one of the most fearsome debuts in UFC history, and Duffee made it clear afterwards that he wanted to get right back into the cage to show fans what he’s really capable of. And it looks like the UFC has found him a suitable challenge for his follow-up performance.

MMA Junkie is reporting that Duffee (5-0) will return at UFC 107 (December 12th, Memphis) to take on seasoned striker Paul "The Headhunter" Buentello (24-10). Buentello previously had a four-fight stint in the UFC in 2005-2006, where he scored stoppage wins over Justin Eilers, Kevin Jordan, and Gilbert Aldana, but suffered a knockout loss to Andrei Arlovski in a heavyweight title fight at UFC 55. Following his exit from the Octagon, he went 3-1 in Strikeforce, with his sole loss coming at the hands (and knees) of Alistair Overeem in a fight for Strikeforce’s heavyweight title. Now, the Headhunter is coming off back-to-back victories in Affliction over Gary Goodridge (via decision) and Kirill Sidelnikov (via third-round TKO).

Find more videos like this on BJPENN.COM
(Sorry, BJ, I couldn’t hear you over Dana’s shirt. Props to CageWriter for the tip.)

As first revealed on BJPenn.com, the UFC lightweight champ will return to action on December 12th at UFC 107 in Memphis. Strangely, the name "Diego Sanchez" wasn’t mentioned in the 40-second video update, though Sherdog reports that Sanchez has at least been offered the fight. UFC 107 is also slated to feature the TUF 10 coaches’ battle between Quinton Jackson and Rashad Evans, and will also reportedly feature Frank Mir vs. Cheick Kongo, and Thiago Alves vs. Paulo Thiago. (I wonder if they can get Paulo Alves to referee that fight?)

But wait a minute, weren’t Penn and Sanchez supposed to headline a third UFC card in November, possibly on a network? "Wait and see boys…if I can pull this off," Dana said at a press conference before UFC 102. Well, maybe he didn’t pull it off. Or maybe the unspecified network in question, like HBO in the past, wanted more control over production than White was willing to give up. At any rate, November 7th is currently looking like an open date on the calendar. You hear that, Strikeforce? November 7th. You think you can get your shit together by then?

("Another opponent that will tool me on the ground? YES!" Photo courtesy of MMA Frenzy.)

According to a new report on Sportsnet.ca (which was also confirmed by MMA Mania), former UFC interim heavyweight champ Frank Mir is tentatively scheduled to face Cheick Kongo at UFC 107 (December 12, Memphis). Mir will try to bounce back from his crushing loss to Brock Lesnar at UFC 100, while Kongo is coming off his own smothering defeat against Cain Velasquez at UFC 99. The match would support the headlining light-heavyweight scrap between TUF 10 coaches Quinton "Rampage" Jackson and Rashad Evans.

We know Kongo hits hard, but if Mir can get this one to the mat, his massive jiu-jitsu advantage could decide the fight. No matter what happens, both guys have a lot to lose in this one. (I wonder if Mir will keep pushing his "cocky bastard" routine now that he’s been completely humbled?) Speaking of UFC 107, Rampage and Rashad will be the subjects of a Primetime mini-series on Spike, showcasing their preparations for the match. Think about it, know it, see it.