(If there was ever an image that summed up Garcia’s UFC experience, this is it.) 

You know, we may have had our fun at Leonard Garcia‘s expense over the years, but when it was passed along that his fighter profile had finally, mercifully been removed from UFC.com’s master list this morning, we were filled with an unexpected sense of dread — the ending of Old Yeller comes to mind.

While it’s true that you could easily fault Garcia for being entertaining to his own detriment (not unlike Chris Lytle, although “Lights Out” did manage to break the .500 mark by the end of his UFC career), it would hard to blame the man himself for being gifted a few decisions or overstaying his welcome in the UFC; Garcia simply showed up when told, always made weight, and put on as entertaining a fight as humanly possible. That’s more than most past or present UFC employees can say, and the fact that Leonard managed to do all this without once testing positive for a banned substance or steroids* should only improve his much grumbled about reputation in the organization.

Unfortunately, Garcia’s 2-7 record in the promotion did little to raise said reputation, hence the removal of his profile — along with the profiles of a few other fighters that we’ll get to in a second — from UFC.com. Dana White had mentioned that Garcia’s UFC future was “not looking good” following his fifth straight loss to Cody McKenzie at UFC 159 last month, so it was only a matter of time before this news broke. With the loss, Garcia joins such company as Steve Cantwell, Elvis Sinosic, and John Alessio as the only UFC fighters to suffer five straight losses in the UFC.

Best of luck, Leonard. Hopefully you can get a couple confidence-boosting wins on the local circuit and work your way back up to the top, because the UFC could always use another fighter who puts the fans before him/herself.

As we mentioned, Garcia’s profile was only one of many to be removed from UFC.com earlier today, so join us after the jump to check out the full list of vitims.

(Good enough to beat up a former title contender. Not quite good enough to remain employed six months later. / Photo via Getty Images)

After losing to Diego Brandao by first-round arm-triangle choke at UFC on FUEL 9 last month, UFC featherweight Pablo Garza has been released by the UFC. Garza confirmed the bad news yesterday, saying that he will focus on coaching and competing in jiu-jitsu for the time being, although he didn’t rule out a return to MMA competition.

Though Garza kicked off his pro career with seven consecutive wins, he endured a couple of setbacks before making it into the UFC. First, he was selected for the TUF 11 lightweight cast, but lost a decision to Michael Johnson in the elimination round before making it into the house. After winning a couple more fights in his native North Dakota, Garza was brought back to the Zuffa fold as a featherweight injury replacement for Jason Reinhardt at WEC 51, and was quickly guillotine choked by Tiequan Zhang.

But the UFC gave him another chance, bringing him into the big leagues after the WEC closed its doors. Garza went on to score back-to-back wins over Fredson Paixao (via Knockout of the Night-earning flying knee) and Yves Jabouin (via Submission of the Night-earning flying triangle). A pair of losses to Dustin Poirier and Dennis Bermudez followed, putting the Scarecrow on thin ice again. But Garza redeemed himself by dominating Mark Hominick in a gritty decision at UFC 154 last November.

The April loss to Brandao sunk Garza’s UFC record to an even 3-3 — not the most impressive tally, but then again, all of Garza’s wins were pretty damn fantastic. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough to keep him on the roster. Bummer. In other firing news…

(1-0 over constrictive tanktops, 0-1 over actual competition. You will be missed, Gilbert. Photo courtesy of UFC.com) 

The UFC continues to steamroll ahead with its massive roster cuts, Potato Nation. And while we are never one to praise the departure of a Zuffa employee (unless it’s Paul Daley, of course), we should at least be able to take comfort in the fact that there are no Jon Fitch level mind-bogglers for us to mourn this time around. However, the UFC’s most recent list of firings does feature — somewhat unsurprisingly — every TUF 17 alum who came up short in the season’s finale earlier this month, as well as a couple other guys who have had less than successful UFC runs as of late.

Taking out the trash is never fun, so let’s just get this thing over with…

(Seriously, all he’s missing is a lisp and an army of lawyers to enable his incoherent conspiracy theories and he’d fit right in with the 209 crew.)  

We’re not ashamed to admit that — despite his many shortcomings both inside the ring and out — Josh Neer will always be one of our favorite fighters. Embracing an “old school,” entertainment over strategy mentality that saw him score back-to-back Fight of the Night awards during his second run in the UFC, the Iowa native has been throwing caution to the wind since 2003 and holds nearly 50 fights to his credit (including notable victories over Mac Danzig, Melvin Guillard, Duane Ludwig, and Joe Stevenson) despite his relatively young age (30).

Unfortunately, it seems as if the third time was not the charm for Neer, as he was recently listed among the UFC’s latest batch of now unemployed fighters, according to MMAOpinion:

Josh Neer (33-13-1) has been released following 3 straight losses inside the Octagon. ‘The Dentist’ a veteran of the sport, was last in action at UFC 157 where he lost a decision to Court McGee. Prior to that Neer had been finished by both Justin Edwards and Mike Pyle. 

Also among the fallen…

(“HYPOGONADISM BITCH, ALL DAY!” / Photo via Esther Lin @ MMAFighting)

Though his job appeared to be safe following his UFC 157 decision loss to Brendan Schaub, pissing dirty for steroids turned out to be the kiss of death for heavyweight Lavar “Big” Johnson. In light of his failed drug test, Johnson has been cut by the UFC. In addition, the California State Athletic Commission has hit him with a nine-month suspension, as well as a fine of “around $1,250″ that reflects the cost of the two tests the CSAC used for his drug screening.

MMAJunkie adds some more surprising details about what led to Johnson’s PED bust:

An elevated testestosterone-to-epitestosterone (T/E) ratio of 6.6-to-1 triggered a carbon isotope ratio (CIR) test that confirmed Johnson had testosterone in his system that was “was consistent with the administration of a steroid.” Johnson, though, admitted he was undergoing testosterone replacement therapy in a recent conversation with the California State Athletic Commission, which oversaw the Feb. 23 pay-per-view event at Honda Center in Anaheim, Calif., and suspended him based on the results of his test. Johnson failed to disclose TRT on a pre-fight medical questionnaire. A rep for AKA said the fighter may seek an exemption for the treatment.

Here’s how you know TRT is nothing more than a bullshit cheating-method — when a dude who looks like this claims to need it, and then avoids mentioning it during his pre-fight medicals. Ah well. You can’t say the UFC didn’t warn you. In other UFC drug-bust aftermath news…

(Wow! Booster seats and sporks at McDonalds looked really weird back in the old days. Photo via idahogirlinalaska)

By Nathan Smith and Josh Hutchinson

Being a “contributor” for CagePotato.com is kind of like being a barback at a seedy nightclub in Tijuana. We stock the bar with booze, ice, and clean glassware while staying in the shadows hoping to God that we don’t get yelled at. We try to help out wherever we can so the star bartenders (Ben Goldstein, Jared Jones, Elias Cepeda and Seth Falvo) can toss bottles of shitty Tequila like juggling pins while they pour fruit-flavored cocktails to semi hot chicks that they will inevitably hump later on. A contributor cleans up puke, empties ashtrays and eats shit from all the “made men” (both writers and tenured comment section dick-heads) here at CagePotato but it really is a great gig. Can you imagine the sloppy seconds that Danga sends our way?

Needless to say, most of the day-to-day MMA related news topics are taken care of by the staff writers and that leaves aspiring dipshits like me and Hutchinson to try and come up with a fresh or entertaining story idea on our own. Well, this idea is not fresh but it could be entertaining (at least my portions will be, but I have hope for Hutch since he is the guy who brought the word “dicknailed” to the CP). When Jon Fitch was released from his UFC contract last week, I wanted to write a piece on which higher profile fighters I would cut next if I were part of the UFC brass. Because opinions are like buttholes, Hutch had a thought to debate several of the choices in a YAY or NAY style. Before anyone starts hollering about Clay Guida, Jake Shields or the entire cast from the first season of The Ultimate Fighter (that means you Koscheck) take note that we agreed on more than we disagreed and in the spirit of pointless arguments opted to leave the most obvious offenders out. Let’s get started.

FRANK MIR – last disclosed salary: $200,000

(Photo via MMAWeekly)

(Yes, Brendan. You certainly *are* a stinker. Photo via Esther Lin/MMAFighting.com)

With their talent roster about 100 bodies over-budget, the UFC has had to make some hard decisions lately. Every fighter who doesn’t win impressively, or lose really impressively, is potentially on the chopping block. Which is why it surprised me today to see that Lavar Johnson will be keeping his spot in the UFC heavyweight division despite suffering his second consecutive loss against Brendan Schaub at UFC 157.

As we all know, Johnson loves to stand and bang. Unfortunately, he didn’t get much opportunity to do either against Schaub, who repeatedly took Johnson down and laid on top of him. The ease with which Schaub executed this “cerebral” game plan suggested that perhaps Johnson wasn’t aware that takedowns would even be allowed in the match. When the dust had settled, Schaub had won ugly, and Johnson had lost uglier.

So why is Lavar keeping his job, when so many others have been cut loose? There are countless factors involved in the UFC’s firing policy these days, so we tried to make some sense of it by putting it into flowchart form. Click the image below to enlarge. We hope this can be of service.

(BG)

(Matt’s actual marijuana card, via @riddletuf7)

For the second time in less than a year, UFC welterweight Matt Riddle has tested positive for marijuana in a post-fight drug test, spurring the UFC to release him from his contract. Riddle’s latest failed test followed his split-decision win over Che Mills at UFC on FUEL 7 in London on February 16th, which came just seven months after his 90-day marijuana suspension following his UFC 149 win over Chris Clements. That victory was later changed to a no-contest, and it’s likely that Riddle’s latest win will be overturned as well.

Riddle was already on thin ice with the UFC because of the quality of his recent fights. Here’s Dana White calling him out by name while discussing the UFC’s decision to cut Jon Fitch: “Riddle fights just like Fitch. Has been lately, anyway. He went from being super exciting to now he wants to grab your legs and hold you down.”

Riddle had long maintained that he doesn’t use marijuana to get high, but for therapeutic purposes. As Riddle explained on The MMA Hour last October:

“I do smoke but I’m not smoking to get stoned. I’m smoking so I can finally relax, sit back and just not worry about things. People, maybe they did it in college one way, but for a guy like me, for a professional athlete that goes through what we go through, it’s medicine for me. Maybe for some little stoner sitting on the couch playing XBox, for him, it’s a drug. For me, it’s medicine…

(The relevant ranting starts around the 20 minute mark, but scroll back to the 12:40 mark if you want to see White basically have a mental breakdown when discussing Jon Fitch.) 

When the UFC announced that their latest batch of mass firings included none other than former #9 ranked welterweight Jon Fitch, the MMA community responded somewhat alarmingly to say the least. When Dana White stated that the decision came as a result of Fitch’s price tag being too high — at a paltry 66K no less — it revealed a bigger problem that could be looming on the horizon for the UFC: Overspending. As BG pointed out, multiple television deals and decreasing pay-per-view buys could at least be partly to blame for the UFC’s recent string of…let’s just call them frugal decisions.

But as it turns out, Fitch & Co.’s departure is just the beginning. Oh yes, a great deluge of firings is headed our way, Potato Nation, one consisting of up to 100 UFC fighters. And if you think the first name that Dana White would place on the potential chopping block would be one of the Shane Del Rosarios, Keith Wisniewskis, or Leonard fucking Garcias* who are currently winless in the promotion, well you just don’t know how The Baldfather thinks. Believe it or not, former WEC champion Urijah Faber was the first to be mentioned as in danger of losing his job with a loss at UFC 157. When asked if his “down the ladder” argument in relation to Fitch applied to guys like Faber, White was characteristically frank (24:50):

Could be Saturday [that he's cut]. You never know, There’s over 100 guys. We’re heavy. 

The argument to cut Faber instead of Fitch already makes sense when considering both fighter’s records in the promotion (Fitch: 13-3-1, Faber: 2-2), and that argument only gains more momentum should Faber lose to Ivan Menjivar — who he is currently a 3-to-1 favorite over — tomorrow. But from a business standpoint, releasing as hot a commodity as Faber (or fighters like him) into the arms of “Viacom MMA” seems like promotional suicide, does it not?

(Fitch finds himself on the wrong end of a Fitch’ing against Demian Maia at UFC 156. Photo via Getty Images)

In the wake of Jon Fitch‘s surprise firing during the Great UFC Bloodletting of February 2013, even die-hard Fitch-haters criticized the move. As the general argument goes, how the hell are you going to cut a fighter who’s one of the ten greatest welterweights in the world by your own rankings, and whose last victory over Erick Silva was a Fight of the Night performance that proved he still has greatness left in him?

UFC president Dana White explained the decision to media yesterday at the UFC 157 press-conference in Anaheim, calling Fitch “super f—ing expensive,” then laying out exactly why he’s not worth the money:

“Jon Fitch was ranked number nine, OK, however you want to look at that, he’s ranked number nine, whether it’s right or wrong or the rankings are bullshit or whatever. Ranked number nine right now. Now, this isn’t a case where Jon Fitch was ranked No. 9, No. 7, No. 6, No. 4, No. 2 and then we cut him. He was ranked No. 1, fought for the title and then he was ranked No. 2. He was ranked No. 3, 6, 7, and now he’s 9. That’s called the downside of your career. He’s on the downside…

“He had a draw, then a loss, right, then a win, then a loss. It’s good, he got more money. He got Fight of the Night because it takes two guys to do that. Right? If Erick Silva’s wrestling wasn’t right there, that wouldn’t have been Fight of the Night. At the end of the day, when you really break it down, who did Erick Silva beat? This was Erick Silva’s first real big fight and big test. And it was a damn good fight. That’s called the downside. He’s not buzzsawing through guys, he’s not doing a [Johny] Hendricks. So it’s not like Jon Fitch was on this incredible fucking winning streak and ‘the greatest fucking welterweight in the history of the world and a fucking Hall of Famer. The guy’s never won a fucking title in his life.”

In other words, Fitch is #9 with a down-arrow, and Erick Silva was never that accomplished to begin with, though Silva nevertheless deserves all the credit for how good that fight was. [*I promise this is not a Scanners gif*] But let’s get back to the more important issue: That Jon Fitch, who makes $66,000 to show, is “super fucking expensive.” Please take a moment to realize what an absolute joke your favorite sport is. Ben Fowlkes puts it best on MMAJunkie:

(You think it would be damn near impossible to sum up an 18-fight UFC career in one image, yet here we are.) 

Wow.

When we announced just hours ago that Jacob Volkmann had been cut from the UFC as part of a vast, government-led ploy to disarm the public following a 1-2 run in his last 3 fights, little did we know that his termination was just the precursor for one of the largest mass firings in UFC history. But that appears to be the case, as it was recently made public that Volkmann was but one of 16 fighters to be cut from the UFC today.

Among the dead are a few guys you probably wont recognize (C.J. Keith, Motonobu Tezuka (?), Simeon Thoresen), a few guys who probably had it coming (Vladimir Matyushenko, Mike Russow, Mike Stumpf) and a couple of guys who couldn’t find a win in the UFC if they sold their souls to Dana White Satan (the continuously underwhelming Jorge Santiago and poor, poor Jay Hieron).

However, if you were to continue looking over said list, you would find a couple inclusions that would not only make you scratch your head, but possibly shave your head, eyebrows, body hair, and nipples off in a hallucinogenic stupor. After the jump, we’ve compiled our own list of the most shocking entries.

(In an even stranger turn of events, it was revealed that Vollkmann was actually required by law to wear that shirt whenever he was within a half mile of a playground.) 

My God how the time flies. You might not have realized it — mainly because he is the type of fighter that screams “Facebook prelims” — but outspoken Minnesotan (new band name, called it) Jacob Volkmann has been fighting for the UFC for upwards of three years now, and has collected an impressive 6-4 record in the promotion. Outside of the octagon, Volkmann gained notoriety over the years for once threatening to rip off President Obama’s arm and subsequently receiving a visit from the Secret Service, an incident he would parlay into hundreds of thousands of tens of dollars in hideous, neon orange t-shirt sales.

But unfortunately for all of us Tea Party-supporting, lay-n-pray aficionados, Volkmann’s avant-garde experiment that dared combine the gripping excitement of wrestling clinics with the comic stylings of Neil Hamburger has come to an end, at least for now. Volkmann announced earlier today via his Twitter that he has been cut by the UFC following his loss to promotional newcomer Bobby Green at UFC 156: 

(Griggs might not have had the best ground game in the biz, but he made up for it in pure funkatude.) 

It must be spring, Potato Nation, because in order to make room for their new batch of Strikeforce fighters, the UFC has been doing a little cleaning out of their roster as of late. In total, 9 fighters have been axed as of this morning, including everyone’s favorite muttonchops aficionado, Chad Griggs. MMA Opinion has the full list, so join us after the jump to find out which fighters will no longer be punctuating the undercards of FUEL and FX events.

Chad Griggs: 11-1 before entering the UFC, Griggs’ lack of a ground game was quickly exposed in his debut, where he was choked out by Travis Browne in under three minutes at UFC 145. After dropping to light heavyweight, Griggs returned at UFC 154 to face PRIDE veteran and feared striker Cyrille Diabate. Those who were expecting a slugfest left disappointed, however, as Griggs was choked out in the first round again, just 15 seconds later than his first fight.

Marcus LeVesseur: Despite being one of the more decorated wrestlers to enter the UFC in some time, “The Prospect” quickly showed that he was simply not well rounded enough to hang in the sport’s highest promotion. After dominating the beginning of his UFC debut against TUF 12 alum Cody McKenzie, LeVesseur became McKenzietine victim #11 at just over three minutes into the first round. After scoring a snoozer of split decision over Carlo Prater in his next fight, Levesseur was absolutely savaged by Abel Trujillo at UFC on FOX: Henderson vs. Diaz.

(It isn’t often that you can document the exact moment someone’s UFC career went to shit, yet here we are…) 

If you were to ask any knowledgeable fan of the sport circa 2008 what they thought of Luiz Cane, they would likely tell you that he was “one of the most underrated LHW’s in the division.” Following an unsuccessful UFC debut — which was halted when Cane accidentally struck James “Curse Watch” Irvin with an illegal knee — “Banha” absolutely blistered Jason Lambert and Rameau Sokoudjou in back-to-back contests, then scored a solid UD victory over Steve Cantwell to solidify his place as a rising contender. No, not the five fight losing streak Steve Cantwell, we’re talking about the Brian Stann TKOing, Al-Hassan arm-breaking Steve Cantwell. Cane’s chin appeared to be made of iron, platinum, unobtanium, or whatever element you’d prefer to compare it to, and combined with his solid takedown defense and devastating hands, looked to be on the fast track to a title shot.

But then, things fell apart (as they oft do in MMA) and Cane would quickly find himself fighting not just for a win, but to remain employed under the promotion in which he had once thrived.

It all started when Cane squared off against PRIDE veteran Antonio Rogerio Nogueira at UFC 106.

(He beat the crap out of Jamie Yager, so he’ll always be a legend in our book. Photo props: Justin M. Bowen/ Las Vegas Sun)

When UFC matchmaker Joe Silva calls you to fight on short notice as an injury replacement, sometimes it’s better to not even answer the phone. That’s the lesson we’ve learned from a contradictory pair of recent firings that seem to define the phrase “damned if you do, damned if you don’t.”

As confirmed by MMAFighting.com, welterweight contender (and former CagePotato guest-blogger) Rich Attonito has been released by the UFC. Attonito had an official record of 3-2 within the Octagon, and last competed at UFC 140 in December 2011, where he was TKO’d by Jake Hecht. Here’s the sequence of events that led to Rich’s firing, from the MMAFighting report:

When [Pascal] Krauss pulled out of UFC on FUEL TV 5, [Joe] Silva offered Rich Attonito the fight against [Gunnar] Nelson via Attonito’s manager Dan Lambert. Lambert spoke to the American Top Team fighter, who agreed to take the welterweight bout. The next day, Lambert called Silva to tell him Attonito said he would not be able to make the 170-pound weight limit on short notice. Silva then offered him the opportunity to take the fight at a 175-pound catch weight, which both Attonito and Nelson, through his manager and father Haraldur Nelson, agreed to. The next day, Lambert called Silva back again to inform him that Attonito would not be able to make the 175-pound catch weight either. As a result, Silva decided to release Attonito from his contract.

Here’s the deal: When the UFC offers you an opportunity to come in as a replacement fighter, you generally don’t get a day or two to think about it. Attonito’s crime was speaking too soon — agreeing to a fight before he realized that making weight would be impossible. But at the time the fight was offered to him, saying “no” to Joe Silva probably seemed like the bigger sin.

Anyway, Attonito changed his mind and got fired for it. And you probably remember what happened next…

(Johnson secures a dominant position against Mike Swick at UFC on FOX 4, shortly before it all fell apart.)

After suffering his third-straight stoppage loss against newcomer Gunnar Nelson at UFC on FUEL 5: Struve vs. Miocic, UFC welterweight DaMarques Johnson has been released by the promotion. Johnson confirmed the news via Twitter late last night. “And the hits keep on coming,” Darkness wrote. “No longer a UFC fighter.”

The TUF 9 finalist complied an official record of 4-6 within the Octagon, with none of those fights going to decision — a stat that placed him in a first-place tie on the “Least Decision-Prone UFC Fighters of All Time” leaderboard. His most recent fight was somewhat controversial in that it came just 56 days after a brutal knockout loss to Mike Swick. Johnson faced Gunnar Nelson on short notice as an injury replacement, and while the UFC usually gives extra leeway to fighters who step up to save fights, the fact that Johnson didn’t even come close to making weight likely sealed his fate.

In other firing news…

(The ballsiest fighter to ever step foot in the octagon. *rimshot*) 

Well, we called this one.

In his past three fights, longtime MMA veteran Dennis Hallman has made some startling (not to mention amateur) choices to say the least. After losing a bet to his friend that resulted in one of the most horrifying wardrobe malfunctions of all time against Brian Ebersole at UFC 133, Dennis showed up two and a half pounds overweight for his fight against John Makdessi at UFC 140 and was subsequently fined 20% of his purse. Luckily for him, he was able to pick up a win. Unfortunately for him, he apparently took nothing away from the close call, and showed up seven pounds overweight at yesterday’s weigh-ins. His scheduled opponent, Thiago Tavares, basically treated the situation with an “Are you serious, bro?” but was able to strike a deal with Hallman that if he could get down to only 3 pounds over the limit, the fight would be on.

Hallman was allegedly able to do so, but Tavares then asked him to cut an additional pound, at which point Hallman asked to be removed from the card and became the most recent UFC fighter to join the unemployment line.

(The punch may have missed, but Dillishaw’s stank bref definitely found its mark.) 

It is not a good time of year to be a struggling UFC fighter, Potato Nation.

Just a day after it was made public that Charlie “Big Hair” Brenneman (nickname pending) had been released from the UFC following a pair of losses to Kyle Noke and Erick Silva, the UFC has announced that four more UFC fighters will have to significantly cut back on their children’s wish lists this Christmas. Spoiler alert: Most of the names will not surprise you, unless you were unaware that some of them were fighting in the UFC in the first place, or even a person at all, which is likely the case with a couple of these guys.

And the nominees for saddest fighter of the day are…

-Michihiro Omigawa: Following an 0-2 stint in the octagon between 2007-2008, the DREAM and DEEP veteran reentered the UFC in February of 2011. Unfortunately for him, his second run didn’t go much better than the first. He would drop his first fight to future title challenger Chad Mendes by way of unanimous decision at UFC 126 and get absolutely screwjobbed out of a victory in his second fight against Darren Elkins at UFC 131. A UD victory of his own over Jason Young at UFC 138 would be his first and his last under the Zuffa banner, as he would suffer back-to-back unanimous decision losses to Iuri Alcantara and former WEC featherweight title challenger Manny Gamburyen at UFC 142 and UFC on FOX 4, respectively. Omigawa’s record currently stands at 13-12.

(Noke had carefully selected his training partners to mimic how Brenneman would look on fight night. / Photo via neurovisual)

In the space of two fights, UFC welterweight Charlie Brenneman went from co-headliner to curtain-jerker. So where do you go next if you get TKO’d in 45 seconds by a non-contender on the Facebook portion of a card? The unemployment line, son. Don’t let the door hit ya where the Good Lord split ya.

That’s right, Brenneman has been released by the UFC after taking his second consecutive first-round stoppage loss to Kyle Noke at UFC 152, which followed his submission loss to Erick Silva at UFC on FX: Johnson vs. McCall in June. With his most recent loss, “The Spaniard”‘s overall UFC record dropped to 4-4, including decision wins over Jason High, Amilcar Alves, Rick Story, and Daniel Roberts, and previous TKO losses to Johny Hendricks, and Anthony Johnson. In other words, his victories were mostly forgettable, but his losses were all highlight-reel material. Not a good look.

Brenneman was disppointed but hopeful after getting the news, telling Bloody Elbow’s Steph Daniels:

(Props: @MiguelTorresMMA via MMAMania)

Well this is just friggin’ unbelievable. If a new report from Dave Meltzer at Wrestling Observer is accurate, Miguel Torres‘s recent UFC re-firing wasn’t due to his knockout loss to Michael McDonald earlier this year. Allegedly, it was due to the same lapse in judgement/humor/decency that got him fired the first time. As Meltzer writes:

The cutting of Miguel Torres was disciplinary in nature although it was not said what the cause was, only that he was cut. His record wasn’t bad, with a knockout loss to Michael McDonald who is going to be a top star (provided his hands don’t keep betraying him as he’s already broken them a couple of times) and a close loss to Demetrious Johnson, both top guys. He made the r*** joke on twitter and was fired, then brought back, and apparently he made some sort of a similar mistake.

The tweet at the top of this post was dug up by MMAMania, who point out that it was sent a couple weeks after the McDonald loss. And while it still hasn’t been confirmed exactly what led to Torres’s latest firing, it’s astounding that he would still be playing with fire like this. For those people who viewed Torres as a victim of over-sensitivity during his first UFC firing, you have to admit that he would have to be the dumbest motherfucker alive to continue making rape jokes after he already lost his job once.

If someone could be literally addicted to making rape jokes — and if such a person exists, it would be Miguel Torres — this would represent a pretty obvious rock bottom, and a sign that he needs help. What the hell, man. Seriously.

(True story.)

As a wise man once tweeted, “everyone likes surprises.” Nevertheless, Miguel Torres probably didn’t enjoy the surprise he got recently when he found out that he had been cut for the second time by the UFC. Torres confirmed on his official website that he was handed his walking papers following his first-round knockout loss against rising star Michael McDonald at UFC 145. The firing follows a temporary release in December, which Torres caught for rape-joke-related offenses.

At one point the most dominant bantamweight in the history of the sport, Torres ends his UFC stint with an underwhelming record of 2-2, including decision wins over Antonio Banuelos and Nick Pace, and losses to McDonald and Demetrious Johnson. Prior to that, Torres spent three fruitful years in the WEC, where he won the promotion’s 135-pound belt and successfully defended it three times before a pair of stoppage losses to Brian Bowles and Joseph Benavidez permanently dethroned him.

(Alessio prays for forgiveness (and another shot) after coming up short in a snoozer against Shane Roller at UFC 148.) 

We don’t mean to disrespect a grizzled veteran of the sport like John Alessio, but simply put, if you are shocked to learn that “The Natural” was released from the UFC following an 0-2 stint in the octagon, you are either John Alessio or Lloyd Christmas. Having compiled an 0-5 lifetime record in the promotion, Alessio not only received one of the most undeserved title shots of all time under the Zuffa banner, but will live in CagePotato infamy for his placement amongst the “50 Worst Fighters in UFC History” and “The Ten Most Ironic Nicknames in MMA”. While he might be upset to learn of his placement on one of those lists, the other was more or less just a means of wasting time on our part.

Based purely on comparative success in other promotions, Alessio was/is basically the Canadian version of Jorge Santiago — a man capable of crushing 95% of the fighters he faces outside of the promotion, but one who simply couldn’t put it together under the bright lights — scoring impressive wins over fellow UFC veterans Chris Clements, War Machine, and Sean Pierson among others. Of his five losses, four came by way of unanimous decision, against superior strikers (Thiago Alves, Diego Sanchez), superior grapplers (Mark Bocek, Shane Roller) and superior superiors (Pat Militech). In an interview with MMAJunkie, Alessio discussed how his most recent loss to Roller was the hardest to swallow:

 I’m super upset. I worked so long and so hard to get back, and the UFC always puts all this pressure on you about being exciting, so I tried to change my style up to be crowd-pleasing. But then I get an opponent in my last fight, where he just chose to hold me down to win the fight, and it’s just depressing that that gets rewarded when all they talk about is exciting fights.

I really thought that I’d be spending more than a couple of months of 2012 in the UFC. I thought I’d get one more shot. I don’t know where I should go or what my options are.

Though we are sure that Alessio will find success wherever he lands, his hope of getting a win in the UFC before he retires is a long shot at best at this point in his career. The 33 year-old Xtreme Couture products record currently stands at 34-16.

A tribute to Alessio’s finest UFC moments is after the jump. 

(Gentlemen, no need to show me the door, because THERE IT IS RIGHT THERE!) 

There aren’t many fighters in the UFC who have had longer layoffs in between fights than Carlos Eduardo Rocha. Well, maybe before this summer began, that is. Fighting just three times between November of 2010 and June of 2012, Rocha’s 1-2 UFC record included a submission via kneebar win over Kris McCray and a pair of close decision losses to Jake Ellenberger at UFC 126 and most recently, Mike Pierce at UFC on FX 3. The latter fight, which you may recall was originally scored a split decision victory for Pierce rather than a UD thanks to the general incompetency of Floridians, was a relatively lackluster affair that was dominated by Pierce’s clinch and wrestling game ala Couture vs. Vera.

It might surprise you to learn that Rocha, an incredibly decorated BJJ practitioner whose only trips to the scorecards have come in the UFC, was let go following the loss. As one might understand, Rocha was none too happy to learn of this news, and quickly vented his frustrations (mainly, those relating to Pierce’s performance) when interviewed by Tatame:

I went there to fight MMA and he wants to win by points. There were 15 minutes of pure stalling This is bullshit. And UFC fires me after a fight where the guy just stood there stalling. I had good performances and even so I was cut off. I didn’t expect this.

Ah, the Nick Diaz defense. Classy move, Mr. Rocha.

More from this interview after the jump. 

(We’ll give “The Robot” this, he never left a *victory* in the hands of the judges.) 

Of all the fighters to be kept around by the UFC for longer than they should have, the story of Steve Cantwell‘s inexplicably long run with the promotion is perhaps the most confounding. That is not a knock on Mr. Cantwell, but more of a general observation. After defeating Brian Stann at WEC 35 to win the WEC’s last Light Heavyweight championship (not to mention a bit of redemption), Cantwell kicked off his UFC career in memorable fashion, snapping Razak Al-Hassan’s arm and then gloating over it like a serial killer at UFC: Fight for the Troops back in December of 2008. Unfortunately for “The Robot,” the win would be both his first and last while under the UFC banner.

Cantwell’s next fight would be an entertaining three round kickboxing match with Luiz Cane, a fellow light heavyweight prospect who has fallen on hard times as of late, at UFC 97. It was shortly thereafter where those following Cantwell (including Joe Rogan) began to notice a change in Cantwell’s character, at least when he stepped into the ring. His next four losses, which came to Brian Stann, Cyrille Diabate, Mike Massenzio, and Riki Fukuda, respectively, were marked by an all but total lack of striking defense on Cantwell’s part, who seemed as if he was literally trying to absorb as much damage as possible en route to defeat. All four of those losses came by way of unanimous decision, and all four would see Cantwell fail to engage with any sense of urgency on the feet while having his face put through a meat grinder in the process. None of his fights were incredibly memorable, and most of them took place on the undercard, yet Cantwell stuck around for as long as he possibly could.

Like we said, we’re not here to kick a man while he’s down, but rather to wish him the best at wherever he may land in the future. We just wish we could have seen a little more of that sociopathic fire in his eyes over the last couple years.

News of Cantwell’s release comes amidst a plethora of UFC firings, the complete list of which awaits you after the jump.

Mayhem Miller and the UFC? I never want to see those two again. Props: MMAFighting.com

While it remains to be seen whether Jason “Mayhem” Miller will actually retire after his loss to C.B. Dollaway during last night’s UFC 146, he certainly won’t be having another fight in the UFC any time soon.

During last night’s post-event press conference, Dana White announced that the UFC has parted ways with Mayhem. While the news isn’t exactly surprising in any way, it’s interesting that Dana White cites “some crazy shit” that took place backstage as the reason for Miller’s release. Before you begin to speculate, the incident was not a fight. As of right now, there are no other details on the incident.

I was about to write that Jason Miller’s UFC run has been forgettable, but honestly, it was much worse than that: His career in the UFC has been memorable for entirely the wrong reasons. He’s been little more than a class clown, insulting opponents during interviews and wearing ridiculous outfits only to get thoroughly dismantled in each of his appearances. He’s looked so bad throughout his UFC career that Dana White is on record claiming that he’s seen women in Tae Bo classes with better striking.

(Is that Brazilian Walnut I am standing on? Classy.) 

Called it.

As told to FightersOnly magazine by none other than Joey Beltran himself, it appears that the UFC has released “The Mexicutioner” following his first round “kickstand KO” (Props to Stak40 for coining the term) loss to Lavar Johnson at UFC on Fox 2. The loss was Beltran’s fourth in his last five outings but his first ever to come via form of (T)KO. In regards to his release, Beltran stated the following:

I am truly grateful for all the opportunities that I have received from the UFC/Zuffa. I am not sad or hurt by their decision as I know that winning is the name of the game. Posting  a 1-4 record my last 5 fights is unacceptable regardless of how entertaining the fights were. So this is the next chapter of my career, and one that I am excited for. You will definitely see my ugly face again so fans don’t worry and haters keep on hating. 

We know the Internet is a cold, harsh place, but what person claiming to be a fan of MMA would hate Joey Beltran?

(Torres following his unanimous decision loss to social media. / Photo via ESPN)

Update: Torres has released a statement about his release. Check it out at the bottom of this post.

Miguel Torres — former undisputed WEC bantamweight champion and die-hard fan of rape jokes — has been released by the UFC. Dana White confirmed the firing yesterday evening, telling SI.com, “his career with us now is over.”

The reason for Torres’s release was a tweet that reportedly read, “If a rape van was called a surprise van, more women wouldn’t mind going for rides in them. Everyone likes surprises.” Torres later removed the tweet and replaced it with an edited version. White was informed of the tweet second-hand by Michael Landsberg and made the decision to fire Torres shortly after.

So why is Torres being made an example of, when Forrest Griffin and Rashad Evans made similar off-color statements recently? Basically, it’s because he didn’t have a good enough explanation.

(“I’m here to pick up your daughter. Or your son. Whoever’s free.”)

After a woefully shitty performance against Edwin Figueroa at UFC Live: Hardy vs. Lytle, Jason Reinhardt has officially been released by the UFC. It was Reinhardt’s third loss in the Octagon — in three different weight classes. At 41, he was the oldest active fighter in the UFC.

Reinhardt began his career as a wrecking ball in midwestern regional promotions, racking up an astounding 18-0 record with all wins by stoppage. (It should be noted that only five of his opponents had winning records, and about half were making their MMA debuts.) Though Reinhardt was originally signed to fight Roger Huerta at UFC 63 in 2006, a neck injury delayed his debut until the following year, where he was quickly choked out by Joe Lauzon at UFC 78.

Reinhardt returned to the midwest to beat up a couple more nobodies in local shows, and was inactive for a couple years nursing injuries. In February 2011, the UFC had Jason back as a featherweight, throwing him against Tiequan Zhang. Reinhardt lost by submission (again), this time in just 48 seconds. The UFC gave him one more chance earlier this month, this time at bantamweight against Edwin Figueroa. Reinhardt ran around the cage until Figueroa finally caught up to him and TKO’d him in the second round.

Also, he gave his parents crabs once. For real. That charming little story is after the jump, as told by Jason himself while wearing a coon-skin cap.

(A week later, that thing hatched and about 30 baby spiders came pouring out. True story.)

When it comes to getting fired by the UFC, three is a magic number — as in, that’s usually the number of consecutive losses you’re allowed before they tell you to hit the bricks. Case in point, welterweight contender John “Doomsday” Howard, who was just released from his contract after seven fights in the promotion.

Howard began his UFC campaign in promising fashion, picking up split-decision wins over Chris Wilson and Tamdan McCrory, followed by knockouts of Dennis Hallman and Daniel Roberts. Then, shit fell apart. Howard got dominated by Jake Ellenberger en route to a doctor’s stoppage TKO (due to the gnarly swelling of his left eye), then caught decision losses against Thiago Alves and Matt Brown. The loss to Brown was unforgivable, considering Brown was on a three-fight skid himself.

Just think of the captions that a lesser journalist would come up with. Seriously, just think it this time.

You had to see this one coming. Three weeks out from his unanimous decision defeat to Tim Boetsch at UFC 130, the UFC has decided to part ways with TUF 3 winner Kendall Grove. After defeating Ed Herman to win The Ultimate Fighter 3 back in 2006, Grove has gone 6-6 in the UFC, including losses to Patrick Cote, Mark Munoz and Demian Maia. Aside from Ed Herman, the only fighter that Kendall Grove holds a win over who is still fighting in the UFC is Alan Belcher, who he defeated by D’Arce choke back at UFC 69 in April of 2007.