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Tag: ugly

The Fourteen Ugliest Walkout Shirts in MMA

Yes, it’s ugly, trashy and tasteless to include Arianny on this list. Just like this t-shirt. Props:

MMA fighters aren’t exactly known for their fashion sense. So it should come as little surprise that most MMA t-shirt companies produce some pretty questionable designs. The rampant abuse of foil print, skulls, chains, tribal designs and nautical stars among most MMA t-shirts is bad enough on its own; even worse when you consider that they sell for thirty bucks a pop.

Which I guess makes it all the worse when a fighter makes his way to the cage covered in an “athletic fit” Old-English mess. Not only is the shirt revolting, but it’s going to sell for an outlandish sum of money, and be worn by every overweight Texas Roadhouse chef, milquetoast tech support geek and muscle-bound frat boy.

Perhaps the reason that we’ve never attempted an “Ugliest Walkout Shirts” post is because ranking these train wrecks is like ranking, well, actual train wrecks. No matter what order you place them in, you’re a total scumbag for attempting to rank a tragedy from most to least depressing. And besides, you’re clearly wrong about which one belongs at number three. For that reason, these will not be ranked, per se, but rather categorized. How you feel these shirts fall into place is up to you.

Let’s start with the most obvious category:


FML Alert: ‘Dean of Mean’ Is the 82nd-Ugliest Man in the World

Keith Jardine Boston Phoenix ugly MMA UFC
(Yet another sign of’s cultural prevalence: Our name is now being used as a pun to snap on Keith Jardine’s busted-ass face. Image courtesy of the Boston Phoenix.)

This may sound a little far-fetched, but apparently the Boston Phoenix claims there are 81 men in the world who are even uglier than Keith Jardine. It makes a little more sense when you see that the BF‘s new "100 Unsexiest Men of the Year" list includes guys who are more known for being ugly on the inside, like Zimbabwean dictator Robert Mugabe (#73), reality-show retard Ray J (#57), late-night unfunnyman Jimmy Fallon (#22, and referred to by the Phoenix as "Conan O’Bortion"), and superswindler Bernie Madoff (#3). But yeah, the Dean of Mean is up in the mix, sandwiched between fellow crooked-faced athlete Rod Brind’amour and the blind, bumbling Governor of New York.

Now, we’re all for insulting people for the entertainment of others, but talk about soccer-kicking a man when he’s down. It hasn’t even been a month since Jardine dropped a decision to Quinton Jackson at UFC 96, pretty much ensuring that he won’t be in the UFC light-heavyweight title hunt again until the Palin/Jindal administration. And now we’re basically telling Keith that his face makes children hide behind their mothers. I guess all publicity is good publicity, but certainly they could have found an ugly fighter who actually deserves ridicule, like this guy, or this guy, or this guy.

Gina Carano is the 73rd Hottest Woman in the World