(Bobby Lashley vs. Bob Sapp. Props to MMA Scraps.)

We were promised a train-wreck — what we got was slower and far less dramatic. (An ice-cream truck crashing into a tree, maybe?) Bobby Lashley got down to business right away in his main event fight with Bob Sapp at last night’s "Ultimate Chaos" show in Biloxi, taking the Beast down immediately and working some steady ground-and-pound in half-guard for a couple minutes, until Sapp tapped from the abuse. Unfortunately the ref didn’t see it, so Lashley was forced to beat on the helpless 322-pounder some more until a second tap finally caught the ref’s attention. Lashley moves to 4-0 in his budding MMA career, and plans to fight again in September.

The co-headlining fight looked like it was going to turn out the same way, with Pedro Rizzo quickly establishing top position on Gilbert Yvel and throwing down elbows. But Yvel stayed active, kicked Rizzo off and escaped to his feet. Back to his comfort zone, Yvel unleashed a striking assault that sent Rizzo to the mat, and knocked him out cold with strikes from the top. Yvel increased his record to 35-12, with 30 wins by KO/TKO; after the fight, he confirmed that he’ll be facing Paul Buentello at Affliction: Trilogy on August 1st.

(What’s he looking for?  A war.)

I spoke with Affliction VP Tom Atencio for this week’s SI column on his fight with local card dealer Randy Hedderick at tomorrow night’s “Ultimate Chaos” event in Biloxi, Mississippi.  Contrary to my suspicions before our talk, I came away convinced that Atencio isn’t doing this so much as a self-promotional Affliction publicity stunt, but rather because he genuinely wants to.  What makes me think so?  Mostly his reluctance to even talk about the fight, as well as mild surprise that anyone would want to talk about him considering the other fights on the card.

He also offered some insight on his life as a highly-publicized but low-level MMA fighter, as well as his career as a fight promoter.  And naturally he managed to slip in some shots at the UFC…

("After I’m through with you, your face is going to be as stylishly distressed as our premium denim." Photo courtesy of OCRegister.com.)

Betting odds have been posted for some of the key matchups at this Saturday’s Ultimate Chaos show (props to BloodyElbow for the tip), and oddsmakers have labeled Affliction VP/occasional fighter Tom Atencio as the favorite in his fight against Randy Hedderick, who is 4-3 as an amateur and will be making his pro debut against Atencio. Hedderick welcomes the attention that comes with fighting The T-Shirt Guy; in a recent Ultimate Chaos press release, he was quoted as saying:

So let’s peep those odds, shall we?

(Props: MMA Mania)

What: UFC 100
When/Where: July 11th at the Mandalay Bay Events Center in Las Vegas.
Why: Because it’s one of the most stacked UFC cards ever. In the above trailer, Joe Rogan calls the event "fucking insane," then implies that Steve Mazzagatti screwed up Brock Lesnar‘s first fight against Frank Mir. For Brock, this fight is all about revenge. Mir thinks that if Big Nog couldn’t last two rounds with him, Brock’s chances aren’t very good.

In the night’s other title fight, Georges St. Pierre battles for his legacy against the biggest, strongest, toughest test of his career — Thiago Alves, who wants to knock out GSP, take his belt, and become "the man." Also, Dan Henderson and Michael Bisping move out of the reality show set and into the Octagon. Hendo wants to beat Bisping up and shut his mouth a little bit; Bisping wants to be responsible for the first KO loss on Dan’s record. Only on pay-per-viewwww…

(Tom wishes a motherf*cker would call him t-shirt guy to his face.)

Affliction VP Tom Atencio saw a rare opening to take a shot at UFC president Dana White during the press conference to promote “Ultimate Chaos” in Biloxi, Miss., and damned if he didn’t make the most of it.  Atencio’s entering into his second MMA bout against Randy Hedderick, who as far as we know does not run either an MMA organization or a t-shirt company.  And while it’s not exactly like fighting for a UFC title, Atencio points out that at least he’s got the balls to do it, unlike some other promoters:

"I’ve been seen in front of the cameras before as far as the business side, but it’s time to fight. I’m doing something Dana White won’t do and that’s fight. He talks like a fighter, so why doesn’t he fight? I’m stepping up to the plate and win, lose or draw I attempted it. I don’t ever think he would fight."