(McCullough with squeeze Lexxi Tyler, via MySpace.  You might remember her from a couple blue movies she’s been in, such as "Boobs of Hazzard," "Muff Bumpers 5," and "Rack Em."  All actual titles.)

According to MMA Weekly’s Insider Blog, the WEC’s Rob McCullough is going to be out of action for a while, as he’s going on the next season of VH1’s “Celebrity Rehab” to get his sex addiction looked at.  How ’bout that?

Apparently McCullough had surgery on the hand that he broke in his snoozer of a bout with Marcus Hicks at WEC 39, and since he has to take some time off anyway he might as well see if he can achieve his two lifelong goals of being on a reality show and putting an end to his compulsive fornicating all at once.  That’s called making efficient use of your time.

Depending on the source, this may just be part of the third season of the popular “Celebrity Rehab” show that seeks to exploit the substance abuse problems of kind of famous people for ratings, or it may be a spin-off of that show devoted entirely to sex addiction, which would be the perfect place for McCullough to meet chicks now that he and porn star Lexxi Tyler are reportedly no longer dating. (Edit: okay, so they’re still dating, and possibly engaged. Who can tell with porn stars?  I mean, when you think about it?) 

Now begins the great debate as to which MMA fighter made out better in the porn actress dating pool: Rob McCullough or Tito Ortiz?  McCullough managed not to get his porn star girlfriend pregnant (we hope), while Ortiz landed one who was more, um…I guess the word I’m looking for here is “prolific.”  Some comparison photos are after the jump to better aid the discourse.

(Tamdan’s profile pic. Not sure if the serial killer vibe is working for you, bro.)

(The Barn Cat in his natural habitat.)

I could spend hours explaining why VH1′s The Pickup Artist was the most entertaining television series of last summer, but in the interest of brevity I’ll just say that the antics of Mystery and his gang of misfit swordsmen — in their quest to score choice poon despite their deeply ingrained social awkwardness and physical disadvantages — brought me a level of joy unmatched by any other reality show in TV history. It captured a world of seductive scumminess that I didn’t even know existed, and revealed techniques like “negging,” “multiple threading,” and “kino escalating” that I would definitely try out myself if my girlfriend wasn’t always right there, watching.

So imagine how psyched I was when I heard that TPA was coming back for a second season. And imagine how psyched I’ll be if UFC welterweight Tamdan “The Barn Cat” McCrory is one of the “Average Frustrated Chumps” looking to improve his pickup game on national television. Yes, Tamdan has thrown his hat into the ring on pickupartist2casting.com, creating a profile that you can vote on to increase his odds of making the cast. Below the nerdy photos is a questionnaire where McCrory describes his lack of success in bagging chicks. Some highlights:

While my dates usually end on at least a fair note, I usually never hang out with that girl again and I’m back to square one. Either I don’t pull the trigger, or they just lose interest and I don’t hear from them again; I’m not really sure what it is…

I am legitimately a contract UFC fighter. No joke, look me up (http://www.ufc.com/index.cfm?fa=fighter.detail&pid=654). It’s hard to believe I have so much going for me, but can never seem to get a girl. That and because of my appearance (I’m 6’4″, 180lbs and wear thick rimmed glasses), no one even believes me anyway. Everyone tells me to drop the fighter card, but even when I do it gets me nowhere. People get laid off of just knowing me, yet I never have a girl…

I have an extreme fear of rejection. I hate going out on a limb to impress someone, only to be shut down…I need to have the ability to break out of my shell, and be less reserved. I’m extremely socially awkward and have lot’s of anxiety when it comes to women. I usually have to have a few drinks before I can even start talking, and by that time, I just come off as buzzed idiot.

Man, doesn’t it just break your heart? If you have a moment, please vote and spread the word. The fate of Tamdan McCrory’s penis is in your hands…

With Tito on Celebrity Apprentice, Ricco on Celebrity Rehab, and Tank on Jimmy Kimmel Live, last night was one big TV party — and we have the couch-sores to prove it. If you had better things to do, we envy you. But here’s what you missed:

The Celebrity Apprentice
The episode began with Tito Ortiz working out and explaining his charity, St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital. A nine-year-old girl named Elizabeth with “brittle bone disease” came to meet him and gave him a drawing of a garden. Tito nearly destroyed her with a bear hug. This segment was probably thrown together to make up for the fact that he was basically absent from the rest of the episode, in which Hydra and Empresario battled to sell the most Broadway show tickets. The men sneaked off with a very close win, and Jennie Finch was fired for always taking a back-seat “assistant” role. But Tito was equally under-the-radar in the challenge, and if the men had lost, he might have been in danger of getting kicked off himself.

Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew
Ricco Rodriguez made his first appearance at the treatment facility, checking in for his habitual cocaine use. As he explained, after finding success in the UFC, he discovered cocaine, started going through an 8-ball per day, and was the first “ultimate fighter” to be suspended for coke. His usage also led to domestic disputes with his girlfriend, which once resulted in them both being arrested and their one-year-old son being taken by child protective services. Ricco came off like the classic, freaked-out cokehead on his first day in the facility, visibly nervous when the staff went through his bag, and calling out the staff and the other celebrity addicts for their hostility and rudeness, all of which was in his head. In return, the female residents seemed to find him intolorably arrogant and cocky. We don’t think little Ricco will be making any friends at camp this summer. But the most shocking moment was Ricco’s story about a car accident he was in while under the influence.

Sorry. Slow news day…