(Props: IronForgesIron.com)

Fedor Emelianenko‘s hard work at the playground has paid off once again. Earlier today at an M-1 Global event in St. Petersberg, Russia, Fedor met Pedro Rizzo in his possible retirement fight, and knocked him out in the first round. “The Last Emperor” looked focused and light on his feet, and the stoppage — which came less than a minute-and-a-half into the fight — was classic Fedor. Watch as Emelianenko lands a crushing overhand right that topples Rizzo, then bounces the Rock’s head off the mat with some savage ground-and-pound.

Notable fight-fan Vladmir Putin was sitting ringside, and even more impressive was the appearance of Fedor’s brother Aleksander Emelianenko in his corner, so I guess those two knuckleheads have patched up their differences, which is nice to see. Without family, what do we really have, y’know?

To see fight videos from the undercard, go here.

(Kenny is sooooo happy for you!)

This week’s Fighter caption contest — which centered on a chance encounter between The Grim Reaper, Pooty-Poot, and the Muscles from Brussels — was an overwhelming success, hauling in 440-ish entries, nearly all of which revolved around some combination of hepatitis and homoeroticism. Three of them were good enough to earn copies of Fighter, courtesy of Viking and Coach. But first, some honorable mentions:

crookshark: In spite of his fighting skills, Aleksander Emelianenko proved to be terrible at musical chairs.

Destro: Jean-Claude breathed a sigh of relief…finally, someone who was even more underdressed than he was.

Horror Fighter: Frank Dux stopped smiling when Aleks reached into his shorts and pulled out Jackson’s Harley-Davidson bandana.

Dangada Dang: Jean Claude recovering from what will go down in history as THE most awkward boner.
*previous record held by….Jean Claude Van Damme

And the winners are…

Our broheezys at Complex keep landing the big interviews. This time it’s the Russian Nightmare himself, Fedor Emelianenko, who chats with the guys about his recent Affliction commercial shoot, Hong-Man Choi, Sambo, and more. Our favorite bit:

C: Vladimir Putin shows up to your fights on occasion, and the idea of our president showing up to support a fighter seems strange here in America. Have you talked with Putin?
Fedor Emelianenko: Putin once visited me after a fight. Our president is very athletic. He develops and tried to give more attention to sports in Russia right now, which is nice. We did talk.

C: So, would he take out President Bush in a fight?
Fedor Emelianenko: Our president is a black belt in judo and he is also a master in sambo. So if they did that … (laughs) But I think that our leaders should decide their issues in a different way.

Well sure, Bush would get subbed in the first round in a cage fight — but Putin would get his ass handed to him in a cow-chip throwing contest.

To read the rest of the interview, go here.