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Tag: War Machine

Three Myths Busted by the War Machine/Christy Mack Police Report

To this point, everything we “know” about War Machine‘s alleged assault of Christy Mack comes from Mack’s gruesome public statement, along with conjecture from War Machine apologists who weren’t there. Yesterday, TapNapSnap uploaded the official police report — which was drafted and signed on August 9th — and it sheds a little more light on some of the questions that still remain from the incident. Here are three myths that have been officially busted, now that we know what was actually reported to police…

1) War Machine was “fighting for his life.” According to the fighter’s initial twitter recap of the incident, Jon Koppenhaver showed up to the home of Christy Mack (real name: Christine Mackinday) with an engagement ring, and found himself in a life-or-death struggle. The police report makes the incident sound pretty one-sided:

“At approximately 1:30-2 am [Mackinday] woke up to her dogs barking (2 pit bulls that were also sleeping in her bed) and Koppenhaver walking into her room (Koppenhaver was wearing camo Tom’s, dark grey cargo shots [sic], and a white shirt which read ‘Alpha Male Shit Clothing Company’) and turned on the light. Koppenhaver than attacked [Corey] Thomas while he was lying in the bed and Koppenhaver began punching Thomas in the face. Mackinday asked Koppenhaver to stop and Koppenhaver continued to punch Thomas. While Koppenhaver was beating Thomas, Mackinday dialed 911 from her cell phone, and hid the phone from Koppenhaver. Mackinday did not say anything to Koppenhaver, and she left the phone with an open line.

Mackinday explained Koppenhaver choked Thomas by placing Thomas in a ‘rear naked choke’…The fighting continued for approximately 10 minutes and Koppenhaver eventually released Thomas from the choke hold. Thomas was bleeding “profusely” from his face and Koppenhaver had Thomas’s blood on his shirt. Koppenhaver told Thomas to leave and told Thomas that he would kill him if he reported this and Koppenhaver went to jail. Koppenhaver said he would give his friends all of Thomas’s information and his friends would find Thomas and kill him if anything happened to Koppenhaver.”

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Update: Witnesses to War Machine Arrest Claim Fighter Had a Gun, Was Tasered, And May Have Roughed Up a Woman at His Hotel


(It’s too bad we can’t read his t-shirt, because it surely carries a thought-provoking message of universal truth. / Photo via TMZ)

According to the Simi Valley Police Department’s initial statement, War Machine was arrested “without incident” on Friday, for the alleged beating of his ex-girlfriend Christy Mack. But witnesses at the hotel claim that the apprehension involved a taser, a gun, and some hair-pulling. Here are a couple of choice quotes from a KTLA.com report published yesterday:

A hotel guest who witnessed the arrest told KTLA that officers used a Taser on Koppenhaver.

“And they were like banging on the door, trying to get it open, and they’re like, ‘Open the door, open the door,” Nicolle Blankenship said. “Finally when they got it open they yelled, ‘Gun,’ and then all of a sudden you see them shoot him with a Taser. And he got shot with a Taser and he went down to the floor, and then they handcuffed him”…

Hotel guest Mary Casamento said she called police to the hotel after seeing a “big dude” yelling at and pushing a petite woman who was trying to calm him down. He grabbed her by the hair, Casamento said.

CagePotato will pay cash money for any footage of War Machine being tasered during his apprehension. We’ll keep you posted as more details emerge…

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BREAKING: War Machine Captured Alive by U.S. Marshals in Simi Valley, CA


(War Machine mugshot via Simi Valley Police Department/11alive.com)

The manhunt is over. War Machine was arrested this afternoon in Simi Valley, California, on suspicion of assaulting his ex-girlfriend Christy Mack and Corey Thomas, early in the morning on August 8th. Here’s the official statement from the Simi Valley Police Department:

The United States Marshal’s Service requested assistance from the Simi Valley Police Department to effect the arrest of Jonathan “War Machine” Koppenahver on 8/15/14 at approximately 1:45 P.M.

The United States Marshal possessed an arrest warrant for Koppenhaver stemming from an incident in Las Vegas Nevada last week. Koppenhaver was a former resident of Simi Valley and the Marshals investigation indicated he was possibly staying in Simi Valley, CA.

Further investigation revealed he was staying at the Extended Stay America Hotel located at 2498 Stearns Street in Simi Valley. Simi Valley Officers along side United States Marshals pinpointed his exact room and arrested him without incident.

Inside the room was a small quantity of cash and some pizza. The United States Marshal’s Service turned Mr. Koppenhaver over to the Simi Valley Police Department for booking on his warrant from Nevada. He was transported to the Ventura County Jail.

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Second Victim in War Machine Assault Identified as Reality Show Contestant Corey Thomas


(Sorry, it’s the only photo of this dude we could find. / Props: BuddyTV)

Quick update on the ongoing War Machine circus: According to TMZ, the man whose ass Jon Koppenhaver (allegedly!) kicked before brutalizing his ex-girlfriend Christy Mack has been identified as web designer and former reality show contestant Corey Thomas. War Machine reportedly gave Thomas a broken nose and two black eyes, and bit him on the face.

In 2009, Thomas briefly appeared on the VH1 reality series Megan Wants a Millionaire, in which a group of wealthy single men vied for the love of former Rock of Love contestant Megan Hauserman. Competing against such eligible bachelors as “Punisher,” “Cisco,” and “Sex Toy Dave,” Thomas survived the first three episodes — but the show was swiftly taken off the air after fellow contestant Ryan Jenkins murdered his wife and then killed himself.

Hopefully, the next update will be about War Machine getting tazed into submission by Duane Chapman. Stay tuned.

Related: Take a look at the criminal complaint filed against War Machine (MMAJunkie)

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Update: War Machine Wanted on Seven Arrest Warrants, Dog the Bounty Hunter Vows to Find Him


(Machine and Mack, in happier times at the Fleshlight factory. Photo via TitoCouture)

At the time of this writing, War Machine is still on the run, evading arrest for the horrific beating of his ex-girlfriend Christy Mack. (I was going to write “alleged” beating, but do we still need to use that word at this point? I mean, Mack released gruesome photos of her injuries, and War Machine immediately dropped off the face of the earth after the incident. Plus, he already incriminated himself on twitter, basically. I think it’s too late to chalk this one up to a misunderstanding.)

The Las Vegas Police Department confirmed to MMAFighting.com today that the asshole formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver is wanted on the following charges:

1 count battery resulting in substantial bodily harm
1 count battery by strangulation
2 counts battery with substantial bodily harm
1 count open and gross lewdness
1 count assault with deadly weapon
1 count coercion/threat with force

The case has drawn the attention of bounty hunter/reality TV star Duane “Dog” Chapman, who has vowed to seek him out. According to a guy claiming to be War Machine’s brother, Chapman will never find War Machine because he’s in Canada. Man, brains don’t exactly run in that family.

More details to come, as we get them. In the meantime, please watch Kid Nate’s incredibly insightful and passionate take on the War Machine case, the idiots who defend him, violence against women, porn, and retribution.

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Christy Mack Releases Gruesome Photos/Details About War Machine Assault [WARNING: GRAPHIC]

Christy Mack Beaten
(Via Mack’s Twitter. More photos and details are after the jump.)

One day after he was released from Bellator for allegedly assaulting his ex-girlfriend, porn star Christy Mack, notorious TUF alum War Machine (a.k.a Jon Koppenhaver) remains on the run from police with a $10,000 bounty on his head. Mack, however, has been hospitalized ever since.

After promising to make a statement this morning, Mack recently posted photos of her injuries and details of the assault via her Twitter. WARNING: They are absolutely horrific.

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And Now He’s Fired: Bellator Fires War Machine Over Domestic Abuse Allegations [UPDATED]


(War Machine in 2007 / Photo via Getty)

Bellator has fired War Machine after a report from TMZ claimed he was involved in a domestic violence investigation.

TMZ’s report claimed the domestic dispute involved three people at War Machine’s Las Vegas home. Two people were reportedly injured so bad they had to go to the hospital. The report claimed one victim was War Machine’s “significant other.”

A tweet from Christy Mack, War Machine’s sort of girlfriend (the “it’s complicated” relationship status was made for them), seems to confirm the report:

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Bellator 112 Results: Curran Submits Straus With Clutch Rear Naked Choke, Koreshkov Blasts Burrell

Injury considerably dimmed Bellator 112′s star power, with War Machine and Joe Riggs withdrawing from the season 10 welterweight tournament due to injury (as well as Mark Scanlon but he’s not as high profile). We received unheralded fighters Nathan Coy, Cristiano Souza, and Paul Bradley.

Still, the card’s main event featured a featherweight title rematch between champion Daniel Straus and challenger Pat Curran, making it worth the investment of time.

But was the rest of the card worthwhile? Read our main card recap and decide for yourself.

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Why Can’t War Machine Just Get a Motherf*ckin Slurpee? [VIDEO]


(Warning: Language is waaaaaay NSFWProps: YouTube.com/AlphaMaleShit)

Along with his recently launched Alpha Male Shit clothing line, War Machine‘s media empire now includes a YouTube channel where he rants in his car about strangers who he would have beaten up if he wasn’t on probation. War’s latest video blog is above, and it officially places him in the pantheon of batshit car-rant Hall of Famers like Dan Quinn and Nick Diaz.

Here’s the basic premise: WM goes to a 7-11 to satisfy a Slurpee craving, and the clerk on duty immediately asks him to lower his hoodie, since that’s become a rule in places that are often robbed. Not a huge fan of rules in general, War Machine refuses, and literally uses the phrase “I thought this was America.” Another 7-11 worker threatens to call the cops, so War Machine dumps his Slurpee on the floor in protest — you know, like a child would — then leaves. Re-telling the story fills War Machine with the kind of barely contained rage that Werner Herzog should be narrating over.

War Machine gets himself scarily amped up to obtain a Slurpee at a different 7-11 location. He leaves his phone in the car, still recording (“I don’t want evidence in case I freak out”), and then disappears for an agonizingly long two minutes. Anything could be happening in those two minutes. When he returns with his Slurpee, it’s a relief for everyone. The guy who sold War Machine that Slurpee didn’t know how close he came.

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Last-Second Christmas Present Ideas: War Machine Launched a Clothing Line, Y’all.


(MICROSOFT PAINT IS ALPHA MALE SHIT! Photo courtesy of Alpha-Male-Shit.myshopify.com. Of course we aren’t joking.)

Do you have some last-second Christmas gifts to buy for the MMA fans in your life? Do said fans often find themselves looking at MMA t-shirts and thinking “Yeah, this assortment of glitter, botched Hanzi and skulls is fantastic, but I need something a little more ridiculous.” Do you have no problems with dropping twenty-five bucks on a shirt that was blatantly designed in Microsoft Paint, and probably in under twenty seconds?

Then do I have some excellent news for you: War Machine has launched a clothing line – subtly called “Alpha Male Shit” – and it is exactly what you’re assuming it is.

Alpha Male Shit solves the dilemma that apparently alpha males face all the time: How does one demonstrate how badass he (or she!) is while doing everyday things like grocery shopping, visiting the zoo or mowing the lawn? The answer, obviously, is to wear a shirt proclaiming that you do Alpha Male Shit; this way, even the alpha male getting his teeth cleaned can remind his dentist that he’s usually more awesome than this. If you think I’m joking, then take a look at what appears to be the brand’s signature design (I base this squarely off the fact that there are four variations – including a female version! – of it in the shop right now):

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