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Tag: War Machine

And So It Ends: War Machine’s Last Big House Blog…At Least for Now


(Video courtesy of YouTube/WEEZER)

It’s a bittersweet week for both fans of War Machine and fans of War Machine’s Big House Blogs. The fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver is set to be released from jail on Friday, which means the only blogs we’re going to get from here on out (unless of course he ends back in the clink) will be about his training regimens, his married life and thoughts on the world. Something tells me that being behind bars contributed to how deranged some of his deep thoughts were the past year and it’s likely that being on the outside will change all that.

Let’s hope I’m dead wrong.

Until he proves me wrong, go ahead and savor your last instalment of War Machine’s Big House Blogs after the jump.

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Instant Bestseller Alert: War Machine is Writing a Book

Our favorite MMA convict, War Machine is a free man in just under a month and when he gets out, the fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver wants all of us to know that even though his Big House Blogs will cease, he plans on continuing to entertain us with an autobiography he has been penning the past few months behind bars.

You know you’ll read it, especially if he details his short-lived porn career and his multiple brushes with the law.

Check out what he had to say about his tome and his final weeks in jail in his two latest blog entries after the jump.

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The 16 Most Notorious Arrests in MMA History


(Spit-bags: The sure sign of a bad time. Photo courtesy of TMZ.)

By Ben Goldstein and Jason Moles

The rule applies in any profession: For every law-abiding nice-guy, there’s an unstable son-of-a-bitch who you’d never want to leave your kids alone with. And so, we decided to take a ride through MMA’s shadowy history of assault, robbery, vandalism, drug-smuggling, and other nasty behavior — the most infamous examples of fighters living dangerously and paying the price…

#16: Jeff Monson
Arrested for: First-degree malicious mischief; assault on a female and injury to real property

It’s never a good idea to have evidence of your law-breaking published nationally. In a bizarre lapse of judgment, heavyweight veteran Jeff Monson was busted after he allowed ESPN the Magazine to photograph him spray-painting an anarchy symbol on the Washington state capitol building. Though the charge packed a maximum sentence of 10 years in prison, the Snowman was able to plead down to three months. Just days later, Monson was arrested again when a domestic dust-up with one of his many love-interests resulted in an overturned grandfather clock and a fist-shaped hole in the wall; those charges were later dismissed.

#15: Kim Couture
Arrested for: Domestic violence

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War Machine’s Big House Blog: Musings on Reincarnation, Open Relationships, and His Plan to Save the World

(If he only knew then what he knows about ‘gay hippy shit’ now…)

Well, War Machine has finally realized what most second graders already know- ‘reading is great’. To think, it only took him being exiled from the UFC, failing at a career in porn, and being sent to jail for felony assault to discover the joy of books.

Below you’ll learn that War doesn’t get down on all of that made-up organized religion crap, preferring to root his beliefs in more time-tested scientific certainties like interdimensional yogis and reincarnation. The good news? While he’s out zipping around through space and time, he totally doesn’t mind if you bone his wife.

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War Machine’s Big House Blog # 41: Steroids Are Safe, Bin Laden’s Alive and the Yakuza are Causing Natural Disasters in Asia


(Little known fact: War’s mother’s name is Game Machine.)

War Machine’s latest big house blog is up and according to the incarcerated fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver, pretty much everything we think we know is a lie.

The TUF 6 vet is gearing up for his final few months behind bars in county jail, and as such, has brushing up on his current events in the news. According to the beleaguered fighter, everything that he’s read lately, from Barry Bonds’ steroid trial to Bin Laden’s alleged death  is carefully propagated government bullshit.

Check out the latest instalment of Deep Thoughts with War Machine after the jump.

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War Machine’s Big House Blogs Are All Caught Up and They’re as Crazy as Ever


(There better be a follow-up series of blogs that follow War AFTER he’s released so we can see how disconnected from society he’s become.)

If you’ve been following the trials and tribulations of War Machine in county jail, you know that his friend on the outside who was posting his blogs let them lapse for a while and is now playing catch-up. Well, the blogs are finally up to date and unfortunately for fans of the weekly journals of one of the greatest minds of our generation, the fighter formerly known as Jon Kopenhaver only has 12 weeks remaining on his one-year sentence for assault.

Rather than post the remaining few entries verbatim, we’ve decided to print just the meat and potatoes of the blogs to get you up to date with the shenanigans WM has gotten into the past few weeks.

Check out the highlights after the jump.

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Want to Be a UFC Fighter? Send an Application to Jobbi.com and Keep Your Fingers Crossed

Jobbi.com announced today that it has formed a partnership with Zuffa to help the parent company of the UFC and Strikeforce recruit fighters.

According to the company’s co-founder Lawrence Vaughan, applicants will receive feedback from members of the job search hub which will help improve their standing on the site and may lead to them gaining the attention of UFC brass.

“Together with the UFC, we’ve created a streamlined process that makes it simple for new fighters and UFC management to connect with each other. There is also a social component that makes it easy for general public to get involved. People can talk with fighters, watch videos of applicants, and show their support for their favorite fighters,” explained Vaughan. “It is an exciting, ongoing process to determine who will ultimately get their dream job fighting for the UFC.”

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Easter Sunday Video Tribute: ‘Back From the Dead’ Fights

Robbie Lawler Melvin Manhoef Strikeforce MMA photos
(Leg kicks, why have you forsaken me? / Photo courtesy of allelbows.com)

Today, as you know, is Easter — a day in which Christians celebrate the resurrection of Jesus, three days after his crucifixion. To commemorate the holiday, we’d like to take this time to remember notable resurrections in the sport of mixed martial arts. (Because we’re respectful like that.) There’s nothing more incredible than watching a dude get the living crap beaten out of him for minutes at a time, and then somehow, miraculously, finding the strength to knock his opponent dead before the last bell. So without further ado, here are 11 of our favorite “Back From the Dead” MMA fights of all time…

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War Machine’s Big House Blogs Just Jumped the Shark, If That’s Even Possible


(War has really grown up in prison.)

We know they say that being in prison can screw with a man’s head and we know it’s hard to believe that War Machine could say, do or write anything stranger than he already has, but let’s just say what you’re about to read will likely make you ask, “What the fuck is wrong with this guy?”

Nothing we can say about his latest big house blog will be any funnier than the tragic comedy-reality of the situation, so go see what kind of wackiness the fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver got into recently in solitary.

A word of advice: Don’t read it on your lunch or dinner break at work.

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War Machine’s Big House Blogs Number 21, 22, 23 and 24: Who Says You Need University to Be An Expert on Sociology?

(This is the look that sends cons running for a new cell? Really? PicProps MMAMania)

Well, now that War Machine’s friend on the outside has figured out how to post his blogs again, the jailhouse ramblings of the fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver have been coming fast and furiously the past week.

Judging by his references to missing Christmas and to GSP and Danzig winning (they both fought and won at UFC 124) these entries are about four months behind, which makes sense considering that’s when War’s blogs went MIA.

Apparently someone alerted WM about the MMA media’s fascination with his life behind bars and he’s not impressed. If I was a private and upstanding citizen like he is, I’d be pissed too that the media was critical of me

Check out what shenanigans War Machine got into last year after the jump.

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