“Back up, homie: What the hell is ‘Face Book’?”

As MMA fans, we’ve seen our fair share of “WTF” moments. From freak show fights to flashy knockouts to Jon Fitch partying like a rockstar to freaking Jose Canseco, you would think that we’ve seen it all and nothing could surprise us. Yet sometimes a story comes along that is so bizarre that even we are unable to make sense of it.

Houston Alexander returned to the spotlight this weekend. When we last checked in on the former UFC light heavyweight, he was getting his lights turned out by ex-hockey enforcer Steve Bosse. If you thought that was as low as things could get for Alexander, then prepare to flabbergasted.

Here is the latest update on Alexander, courtesy of KMTV News Omaha, via MiddleEasy:

Video streaming by Ustream
Aside from Upstream, props to Ironforgesiron.com

Truly great works of art often take multiple views to fully understand, and a few more to fully appreciate. In that way, this video is kind of like a forgotten masterpiece. Except that it’s absolutely nothing like art in any way, shape or form, and more like an argument I don’t fully understand.

From what I’ve managed to gather, Rampage Jackson isn’t the only light heavyweight in the UFC with snitching issues. Rashad Evans was apparently the only person on Earth to know about “fuckin’ Melissa”, and now people are butt hurt that everyone knows. For what it’s worth, my totally uninformed opinion is leading me to believe that Rashad is as guilty as former Executive Vice President of MusclePharm Leonard Amenta was (i.e. not at all). Come on, you tell only one person about Melissa and chose to pick Rashad Evans? But I digress. There’s a much needed break in the action at the 1:13 mark before the argument resumes at the 3:20 mark.

We blame ourselves.

Well holy shit. Word came out today that Nate Marquardt was having a bad day: he’d failed his medical clearances for his main event fight against Rick Story at tomorrow night’s UFC For Free (or whatever they’re calling it now). There weren’t a lot of details, but his management said it “only temporary” and that “Nate’s future is at welterweight.”

Marquardt’s day turned significantly worse just an hour later, when Dana Tweeted a terse video confirming that Marquardt was donezo:

“I’m sure you heard that Nate Marquardt is out. It’s true. He failed his medicals. Not only is he out of this fight, and out of the main event on Versus, he will no longer be with the UFC.”

WOW. We’re not ones to speculate, but it’s pretty obvious that BigDaddyWhite is pissed, like he’s holding the fighter responsible for some misdeed.

Oh and by the way, Marquardt will be replaced by Charlie Brenneman, who had originally been slated to fight TJ Grant. Grant pulled out of the bout three days ago due to illness, leaving Brenneman without a dance partner.

Feel free to let your imaginations run wild in the comments, and we’ll update you as soon as we hear something from Marquardt.

[RX]

(VidProps: YouTube/PellegrinoMMA)

Not to pull back the curtain too much, Nation, but there’s been a lot of talk behind the scenes lately about CP branching out into a new webshow.  Well, consider the open casting call for hosts officially closed now that we’ve seen Kenny Florian and Kurt Pellegrino doing … whatever it is they’re doing here. All we know is that Pellegrino looks pretty snazzy in that suit jacket (not to mention that finely coiffed hair) and Florian’s vamping alter-ego is approximately 100 times more entertaining than the average MMA fighter’s real personality. We assume that when Chael Sonnen said fighters spend a few hours a day working out and have the rest of their lives to choose between screwing around and positively contributing to society committing crimes, this is what he meant. Personally, we’ll take screwing around. You had us at “Don’t talk back to me,” KenFlo.  

Guy In Wheelchair Stops Robber – Watch more Funny Videos

Word to the wise — before you try to start trouble at a convenience store, make sure there isn’t a paraplegic BJJ specialist waiting in line to buy scratch-off tickets. The above video was taken Saturday night in Vancouver, after a man tried to pass off a suspicious-looking $50 bill. When the clerk refused to accept it, the dude in black lurched awkwardly behind the counter, clearly up to no good.

That’s when Epic Wheelchair Man (real name: Larry Skopnik) rolls up and grabs a rear-naked choke. The robber twists away, and Skopnik transitions to the same kind of guillotine that Dan Miller tapped Jake Rosholt with. And he would have sunk it if those other dudes hadn’t started meddling. (How ’bout that pussy swinging the "Wet Floor" sign?) The gang was able to subdue the bad guy until police arrived. As Skopnik said later, "I don’t feel like a hero and I’m not really comfortable with this limelight. What made me do that is inside of me. It has nothing to do with disability." In other words, you can take a man’s legs, but you can never take his balls.

Thanks to CagePotato reader Paul B. for the tip!

Other than a disqualification in January ’06 for an illegal kick against Yushin Okami, the last time Anderson Silva lost a fight was on New Year’s Eve 2004 at a PRIDE bout against Ryo Chonan. How that loss came about must be seen to be believed:

Note to UFC middleweights: Start working on your scissorlock-takedown heelhook-submissions immediately.