Seth Petruzelli

(Friends forever? Photo courtesy of AllElbows.com)

It’s hard to even get up the energy to mock Jared Shaw anymore.  He’s just so damn irrelevant.  But in talking about the role Kimbo Slice’s loss to Seth Petruzelli played in EliteXC’s collapse, he summed up the company’s fundamental failures without even realizing it:

"I stick up for him a lot because we put so much weight on his shoulders because we had to, we needed a face. No, we didn't expect him to be the world champion. We knew if he fought the kind of fighters that were at that level that his chances of winning were probably slimmer," said Shaw. "But you've got to throw somebody up there as the best in the world, because you've got to put a face on the company. And that's not to say he can't become one of the best fighters in the world, cause he's an athlete, he has talent, but that was the situation we were up against."

(Props: TheGarv)

Previously:
Shinya Aoki: Ugly Schoolgirl
No Homo Alert: Seth Petruzelli
Arianny Celeste: Yep, Still Hot

(Will brawl for food.)

Now that Strikeforce is getting its Pro Elite ducks in a row, we’re all wondering what, if anything, they’ll decide to do with Kimbo Slice.  He was an undeniable draw for EliteXC, but he also came with a hefty price tag that was maybe, just maybe, not justified by his performance in the cage, particularly in his last fight against Seth Petruzelli.

Strikeforce CEO Scott Coker seems sympathetic to the plight of the internet brawler, but perhaps not so much that he’s willing to keep paying him the six-figure salary Pro Elite did:

“I think that if you look back at the past, he could have been built up to have the fights that he needed to face the Seth Petruzellis of the world and be successful, but he wasn’t given the opportunity,” said Coker. “When I look at Kimbo, I don’t look at it as his fault. He was in a ‘no win’ situation.”

Kimbo’s manager, “Icey” Mike Imber, indicated that while he wasn’t enthusiastic about a pay-cut for his fighter, he’d consider it rather than keep him out of action indefinitely.  But one thing’s for sure, Bas Rutten will not be training Slice.  Ever.

(Seth Petruzelli: Not exactly a crowd favorite.) 

Former greatest pound-for-pound boxer in the world Roy Jones Jr. is testing the waters of MMA promotion with a hybrid boxing/MMA card to be held March 21st in Pensacola, Florida. Jones's company Square Ring Promotions, Inc. is hosting "March Badness" at the Pensacola Civic Center, featuring RJJ himself boxing in the main event against Palestinian-American journeyman Omar Sheika. Jones, who has held titles in four different weight classes during his career, is coming off a high-profile decision loss to Joe Calzaghe in November. Of greater interest to MMA fans is the event's supporting card, which will feature three fairly compelling MMA matches.

Seth Petruzelli, the flamingly heterosexual UFC vet who jabbed-out Kimbo Slice at EliteXC: Heat in October then accidentally admitted he was bribed to keep the fight standing, will be facing Doug "Rhino" Marshall, the former WEC light-heavyweight champion who lost his belt to Brian Stann last March. Also on the card, WWE-superstar-turned-MMA-prospect Bobby Lashley, who scored a 41-second TKO over rookie Joshua Franklin during his MMA debut in December, will take on a heavyweight opponent to be named later. And legal problems notwithstanding, Jeff Monson has been booked to fight former IFL champ Roy Nelson, who was most recently knocked out by Andrei Arlovski at EliteXC: Heat.

The whole shebang will be available on pay-per-view.

(Yeah, we definitely need to see this again.)

So, the South Florida Sun Suntinel has this story about how EliteXC's collapse affects South Floridians (thanks for the tip, Fight Opinion), and it contains this rather amazing quote:

Rookie MMA fighter Kimbo Slice is already back in a local gym after his 14-second loss to last-minute replacement and UFC light heavyweight washout Seth Petruzelli in Sunrise.

Slice, who spent Thursday at one of his children's school career day, is weighing his options with his agent Mike Imber. He may fight on the DREAM K-1 New Year's Eve show in Japan, possibly a rematch with Petruzelli.

Oh man, career day? Poor Kevlar. I wonder if Kimbo was too embarrassed to talk about MMA following his recent loss, and instead delivered a five-minute speech about what it takes to be a porn company bodyguard.