heavyweight

('Oh no you didn't, Alistair. And to think I cheered for you against Cro Cop.')

It’s not quite as bad as Lyoto Machida admitting to drinking his own urine every single morning, but Alistair Overeem seems to have some unusual dietary issues all his own.  In a recent interview translated by Robert K, Overeem said he’s changed everything about his life, from his girlfriend to his coach to his diet.  Now he lives mainly on “horse meat, rice, and protein shakes.”  And here you thought your dog was the only one on an equine-centric diet.

Turns out that eating horse meat is popular in certain parts of the globe that are not called the United States (the Mongolians even make a horse milk wine, so there).  According to the always informative Wikipedia:

“Horse meat contains 20% more protein than high quality beef cuts, 25% less fat, nearly 20% less sodium, double the iron and less cholesterol. When compared to ground beef, horsemeat has 55% more protein, 25% less fat, 30% less cholesterol and 27% less sodium.”

That sounds all right, if you can get past the fact that you’re eating a freaking horse.  I guess there’s no real reason, aside from the psychological ones, that it should be any weirder than eating, say, a cow.  And look what it’s done for Overeem’s physique!

Wait a minute, you thinking what I’m thinking?  All that speculation about how Overeem managed to go from a tall, kind of skinny light heavyweight to a bulky beast of a heavyweight centered on the theory that he was injecting something.  But maybe it’s the horses who have been injecting something.  You know, in their desire to get huge, floss, and get mares.  It all makes sense now.  And you know those horses are always outside tanning and stuff.  They really are the Phil Baroni's of the animal kingdom.

Though he’s being courted by both the UFC and Strikeforce, where he is the reigning heavyweight champ, Alistair Overeem will likely have his next fight back in the K-1 ring.  A report on MixFight.nl, translated by our trusty friend Robert at Free Fight Videos, says Overeem has accepted an offer to fight 2008 K-1 Grand Prix winner Remy Bonjasky at the end of March.

There’s no word yet on whether Bonjasky has officially agreed to the fight, and after seeing what Overeem did to the dude who stomped his head in the finals of the Grand Prix he might be having some doubts.  If he does take the fight he might want to try and bulk up first, considering what a monster Overeem has become.

The bad news for us MMA types is that this further delays Overeem’s return to the land of little gloves.  His recent fights have made me all the more eager to see him in against big time MMA heavyweights, either in the UFC or somewhere else, to see if he can keep up these performances against top-notch opponents in places where there are commissions and – I’ll just say it – drug tests.   Looks like the wait continues.

Just for shits and giggles, rewatch Overeem's destruction of Badr Hari after the jump.  'Cause what else you got to do?

(Dueling highlights, via MMA Scraps. And yeah, there's some WWE action in there.)

Ever since yesterday's announcement that Randy Couture would be facing Brock Lesnar in his return to the UFC, you've been wondering: Okay, okay, but what does Kim Couture have to say about this? Fortunately, she didn't keep us in suspense for long. "Sugar Free" went on ESPN radio with Steve Cofield to talk about the match-up and express her deepest sympathies for poor, poor Brock Lesnar:

"It's surprising to me, shocking that they'd throw a guy in there with only three fights. I kind of feel sorry for the guy. He poses some interesting problems but that's what Randy is good at, is taking care of those problems. He's no bigger or tougher than (Gabe) Gonzaga or Tim Sylvia."

'Sup, Sable? You going to let her talk about your man that way? Better represent.

Couture seems to be parroting a line that's already been worn out in the less-than twenty-four hours since this fight has been official. That is, how does a guy with only three fights expect to hang with "The Natural"? Of course, perusing message-boards and MMA websites yields no shortage of people wondering how a 225-pound, forty-five-year-old man can hang with a physical monstrosity like Lesnar, who knows a thing or two about wrestling himself.

In other words, there's more than one angle to come at this fight from, which means Dana White probably knew what he was talking about when he predicted over a million pay-per-view buys. The UFC has taken some heat for a lackluster heavyweight division since the departure of Couture, but to quote Dana White from yesterday's conference call: "Our heavyweight division looks pretty damn good now, doesn't it?"

Point taken.

(Sure, his ground game is solid, but what about his stamina?)

Okay, I've got some bitch slapping to do. I can't stay silent any longer. I've sat back and read the message boards around the MMA universe and listened to the lame ramblings of supposed MMA experts on a subject in the forefront of everyone's mind. It could happen. It probably will happen at some point.

Who can beat Fedor Emelianenko?

While this is certainly a legit question/dead horse waiting to be beaten and should be at the top of every MMA dinner topic - and who hasn't had several of those, right? - I'm fucking sick and tired of the lame-fucking-ass answers that keep floating around cyperspace and are shit from the mouths of these MMA 'experts'. Check out some of the answers coming from the MMA world's message boards:

-"A heavyweight Sean Sherk"
-"A bigger BJ Penn"
-"GSP, if he were a heavyweight"
-"Chuck Liddell"
-"Ricco, in his prime"

I'm losing my faith in humanity.