NSAC

In this video with Cagewriter's Steve Cofield, Keith Kizer goes into slightly more detail about the Karo Parisyan situation, making it sound more and more like Parisyan was doing the old Matt Mitrione, trying to get out of this fight any way he could.  Granted this is only one side of the story we're hearing here, but it sure sounds like the Nevada State Athletic Commission was beyond reasonable about this whole thing.  Allowing him to pay the fine out of his next purse is akin to letting him work off the debt, which is more than Blockbuster is willing to do.

The most interesting moment here may be when Cofield asks Kizer whether it's usually an issue getting fighters to pay their fines.  I guess I always assumed that the NSAC made you write a check right after handing down their verdict, and if you didn't have it in your bank account anymore by then they made you, I don't know, wash dishes at a local restaurant or something. 

But Kizer says the NSAC is still waiting to get paid by Pawel Nastula, who popped positive for several different banned substances after his loss to Josh Barnett at Pride 32 in Las Vegas back in 2006.  In all fairness, Nastula was accustomed to a different culture with regards to performing-enhancing substances, so it's kind of impressive that he was only on one steroid and three different stimulants.  In Pride, that assortment used to be known as a light breakfast.

(Anthony Johnson does his Bushwick Bill impression following his July 2008 fight against Kevin Burns.)

If Keith Kizer has his way, Dan Miragliotta and Steve Mazzagatti's ability to fuck up fights by not paying attention could be severely limited by the year's end. The Nevada State Athletic Commission Executive Director revealed yesterday on the GoodSports radio show that his commission is trying to figure out how an instant replay system could be incorporated into MMA, to be used only when a potentially illegal blow leads to the immediate end of a match (i.e., Mostapha Al Turk getting eye-poked by Mirko Cro Cop, and Anthony Johnson's repeated pokes by Kevin Burns). As Kizer explained:

(You guys know this thing doesn't even count, right?)

When the Nevada State Athletic Commission ruled yesterday to change Karo Parisyan’s decision win over Dong Hyun Kim at UFC 94 into a “no decision” on account of the various painkillers running through Parisyan’s veins at the time of the fight, I wondered the same thing I always wonder: how does this affect me?

As you may recall, I put a bet down on Kim when I was going crazy in Vegas the day before UFC 94.  I lost and was forced to dance for nickels under a bridge just to get enough money to make it home.  But with the bout result changed, did the MGM Grand now owe me my money back?  Were they also on the hook for the price of the tetanus shot I had to get when I got home (those nickels aren’t clean, no matter what anyone tells you)?  

I didn’t know, so I called the MGM Grand.  Turns out, they didn’t really know either.  After a lengthy back and forth, they gave up and told me to call the sportsbook at the Mirage, whose policies the MGM Grand follows on this sort of thing.  So I did.  I called the Mirage and got transferred around a bunch.  I got told several different times that the sportsbook didn’t take calls, but my question confused enough people, and eventually they put me through to the sportsbook, where my hopes were immediately shot down.

If you've ever wanted to see what a Nevada State Athletic Commission hearing looks like from the inside, you might be interested in these videos (courtesy of CageWriter), which show Karo Parisyan getting reamed for his painkiller use, Phil Nurse defending his own reputation, and BJ Penn crying for justice.  In the above clip, Karo explains why he took those unapproved meds, and throws himself on the mercy of the commission. The "drifting in and out of the state of reality" line comes at 5:54, and the ruling begins at 7:48, where Commissioner John Bailey lays down the suspension and fine, and suggests that in the future, a mixed martial artist's entire win bonus should be forfeited if he tests positive for banned substances.

Below, Nurse admits that in retrospect, his use of Vaseline during the St. Pierre/Penn fight "doesn't look good," and gets grilled about it while BJ Penn stares him down at the other end of the table. After the jump: Penn comes out against all forms of cheating, one commission member basically calls bullshit on the idea that you can ingest something that makes you slippery, and another is just glad that GSP didn't beat him to death. Plus, Penn's lawyer Raffi Nahabedian calls for a full-scale investigation on Lubrigate.

(If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.)

B.J. Penn brought the big guns to today’s hearing with the Nevada State Athletic Commission.  Not only did the Hawaiian have his lawyer on hand to go over his twenty-page complaint, Penn’s mother, Lorraine Shin, got up and read a statement that, according to MMA Weekly, “accused the Commission of not doing its duty to protect fighters.”

That’s right, Penn brought his mother.  And she was allowed to deliver a statement for some reason.  Apparently someone was worried that this whole greasing scandal thing hadn’t gotten ridiculous enough yet.  Problem solved.