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Throwback Thursday: Alistair Overeem’s Eight Greatest Squash Match Performances

In Which The Uber Declares War on Bosnia

Although he’s been paired against far less cans in his kickboxing career, Overeem has still shown the ability to defeat an extremely overmatched opponent with absolutely zero leniency inside the squared circle as well. Take his K-1 World Grand Prix 2010 semifinal match with Bosnia’s Dzevad Poturak, for instance. Despite holding a 3 inch height and 30 pound weight advantage over Poturak, Ubereem doesn’t even offer his opponent a free first punch, as is tradition.

No, Overeem instead chose to blister Poturak with, get this, a knee to the face roughly two and a half minutes in, bringing a succinct end to the Bosnian’s hopes of somehow making it to the end of the fight with his consciousness intact.

In Which The Uber Outclasses a White Guy With Cornrows (Obviously)

For reasons I will probably never understand, the Youtube user responsible for uploading this 2009 squash match between Overeem and some white guy with cornrows (Tony Sylvester) had the audacity to label this a “Great fight”, even going so far as to add six (six!) exclamations to cap off that statement.

It is *not* a great fight. It is as far from a great fight as anything you will ever witness. It’s never a good sign when Bas Rutten is saying “this is going to go wrong” some 18 seconds into the match, and an even worse sign when he is declaring that one of the two fighters “doesn’t want to be here” less than a minute later. So I say shame on you, ART MARTIAL, for using blatant misdirection to drive up views.

In Which The Uber Nearly Beheads Kazuyuki Fujita

If I can say one other thing about Japan, it’s that they have the kind of morbid, twisted sense of humor that I can always appreciate. I mean, just look at how they were willing to sacrifice one of their own people purely for the sake of entertainment. I’m pretty sure that fights like these (and most of Wanderlei Silva‘s Pride career) were carried out as some means of population control, In which case I say, well played, Japan.

In Which The Uber Teaches The Duffster a Lesson in Humility

When Todd Duffee was released from the UFC in 2010 for his “poor attitude”, it was only a matter of time before the MMA Gods doled out some Karmatic justice to The Duffster in the form of a(nother) savage thrashing. Thankfully, Alistair Overeem was more than willing to serve as their instrument of humility at Dynamite!!! 2010.

I couldn’t even begin to describe the travesty that was Overeem-Duffy, so instead, I’ll allow Arizona car crash guy to do it for me.

Swap Duffee for this unsuspecting driver and stray electrical wires for a barrage of knees and that’s almost exactly how it went down.

Any squash matches you think we missed, Nation? 

-J. Jones

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