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Trash Talkin Kid: Sonnen’s Smack Light Years Ahead of Everyone

Who writes these?  Because we may have a job for him.

Whether you think he’s the most entertaining character in MMA right now, or you think he’s the boldest sort of hypocritical cheater, you kind of have to admit that no one — no one — can touch Chael Sonnen for smack talk. There seem to be no rhyme or reason to his endless stream of one-liners, and there’s no telling who he’ll target on any given day.

Sonnen famously used Twitter to trash Anderson Silva in the lead-up to their fight last August, and Anderson (or “Andy”, as Sonnen likes to call him) has remained a favorite whipping boy ever since. Aside from Silva, Sonnen has gone to Twitter to shit talk Michael Bisping, Jason Miller, Wanderlei Silva, Vitor Belfort, Georges St. Pierre and the entire city of Toronto, the Nogueira brothers, The Hangover 2, The Bachelor, Mirko CroCop, Lyoto Machida… seriously, this guy is a never-ending fountain of the kind of talk that will get you curb-stomped outside of a Waffle House, then possibly urinated on.

In all honesty, we kinda wonder where he gets his material.   Tweeting that many one-liners in itself is rather impressive, considering pretty much any one of these would be considered a burn of the burningest magnitude from another fighter.   For Uncle Chael, it’s just another day at the keyboard.   If he never manages to get licensed, he could probably make a decent living running an irreverent MMA site.

Actually, scratch that idea. But he could definitely be a Twitter consultant.

So we’ll leave you with this collection of Tweets, with one more point: this is his output in six days. If you know someone that can do this any better, let us know…because we want to follow him.

[RX]

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Komodo- July 5, 2011 at 4:29 pm
Kill all fucking spam bots plox!
Dizzylittlelord- June 17, 2011 at 5:59 am
stewart McIntosh = dizzylittlelord, Ben Goldstein you owe me a shout out, i started this story
mjsolley- June 10, 2011 at 5:25 pm
DW had the right match set up before Sonnen's own doing screwed him to the wall but hard. Sonnen vs Bisbing...in the house for UF! WOW....what a beautiful mess that should have been!
AgentoftheBat- June 10, 2011 at 4:45 pm
I love how people come on and say he had better watch his back and he's going to get killed in Brazil for this. You're just giving the man fuel for his fire.
They need to get this guy fighting again. We thought Tito and Shamrock could sell a grudge match back in the day? This guy brings it to another level.
DW needs to drop a briefcase full of cash off at the right guys office and get Chael cleared to fight again.
mjsolley- June 10, 2011 at 3:31 pm
I already got one....with your mom.
The_Dead_Cow- June 10, 2011 at 3:09 pm
I think you guys should get a room.
mjsolley- June 10, 2011 at 2:53 pm
Anyone who gets in the cage has balls. Sonnen cheated though. His balls were a little smaller then normal...in more ways then one. And if i were him...I would have gotten out of the car and cracked Wans skull open with his own fn cane...broken leg or not. Just dont tell my P.O. I said that. And I was all for Sonnen in the Silva fight...up until the time he pissed hot.
ArmFarmer- June 10, 2011 at 1:54 pm
I just don't really know what you expect the guy to do in that situation. I agree his body language showed he felt uncomfortable, but I'd feel awkward too sitting in a car listening to some crippled, ape looking, barely intelligible brazilian sitting behind me rambling about respecting Brazil. It was an awkward situation, I don't know how you expect him to react. Actions speak louder than words, and his actions show he's not intimidated by even the most dangerous brazilian there is. He wanted the fight with Anderson, he talked plenty of shit, and when the time came and the cage door shut he showed no fear and took it to Anderson like no one else in the ufc has. Hate all you want, but he pressured the shit out of Anderson and was in his face the whole fight beginning to end. Yeah he's not the best fighter and he got subbed fair and square, but if you can't acknowledge that the dudes got a pair (functioning or not) then you're just blindly hating.
mjsolley- June 10, 2011 at 1:46 pm
Oh...Sonnen was being polite because he wouldnt want to take advantage of Wans broken leg. And...we all know how forward thinking Chal is...so he wanted to avoid an accident. TY...it all makes sense now. He bitched...bottom line! Hes a bitch...bottom line. He cant beat the Braz even when hes juiced! Why dont you go rub his inner thigh to make him feel better till he can get sanctioned again.
ArmFarmer- June 10, 2011 at 12:36 pm
@mjsolley

You do realize wandy was on crutches at the time right? and that they were in a car.. on the way to see their boss? You're right though he should have manned up and jumped in the back seat and laid the smack down on his ass. Who cares if the driver gets kicked and they are in a career/life ending accident. That makes sense.
Walrus- June 10, 2011 at 12:33 pm
Sonnen's hilarious
mjsolley- June 10, 2011 at 12:26 pm
Someone cant read body language! <---(ArmFarmer) He shut his yap real fn quick when Wanderlei had that little talk with him. Funny how he wasnt so funny once face to face...in a potential street fight situation. Look...the guys amusing....but the fact is....he bitched up like a little girl...I'm just glad a camera caught it all. I'm sure as shit he would be telling a much different story about that car ride. Hes a liar...hes an asshole...and the saddest part....hes more entertaining on the computer then he is in the cage.
MonsterMaulingAss- June 10, 2011 at 11:24 am
Hohohoho, is funny cuz all the people he mentioned can or already has kicked his ass(including segal!), hohoho!
InsideScoop- June 10, 2011 at 10:32 am
NGAUGE and the Trash Talkin' Kids need to do a shirt of this dude ASAP!
DangadaDang- June 10, 2011 at 9:46 am
He's just rushing to get all his tweets in before the prison guards take his cell phone away.
Fedor Penn- June 10, 2011 at 9:13 am
Let this man fight! War Sonnen!
RwilsonR- June 10, 2011 at 8:47 am
@ agentsmith - that's all part of the hilariousness that Chael brings. Nearly everything he says about someone else is just dripping with hypocrisy. Yet he still says it as confidently as ever. And everything he says leaves you wondering if he actually believes it. We need him back fighting as soon as possible!
Boo- June 10, 2011 at 8:09 am
the tweet about Wand's face made me LOL.
Machineboi- June 10, 2011 at 7:40 am
He better watch it cause down in brazil he we get his little white ass handled. Sombody will take that personal and there aint gonna be no cage with a ref.Trust me he isnt running the streets talkin that shit, he is talking from a safe place ...Bitch made all the way
agentsmith- June 10, 2011 at 6:54 am
Isn't Chael still at Team Quest? And he calls SILVA'S team has-beens?
SnackDaddy- June 10, 2011 at 6:53 am
Can you imagine what'll happen if Sonnen discovers about podcasts? I think the world's gonna cave-in.
SnackDaddy- June 10, 2011 at 6:52 am
Fucking gold! Give this guy a pad and a chair with Director written across it.
SnackDaddy- June 10, 2011 at 6:50 am
Don't be surprised if you hear in the news that Sonnen has become a victim of a drive-by Sao Paolo. Shit can even go down in the States. He should really be more careful. Fucking love him though.
Kimbos Bread- June 10, 2011 at 6:32 am
hxxp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMu2xNBpyQc

@ 2:26

Looks like Seagal found Chael's missing genitalia.
FrontKick Dentist- June 10, 2011 at 5:33 am
Just like blind people develop other senses Chael's non-functioning balls have enhanced the verbal part of his brain.
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