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Triumph United Comment Contest, Week 1: Victory!

(Death Squad”: One of the designs available at Triumph United.)

Between Chuck Liddell‘s leg injury and “Starnesgate,” it was a great week to kick off our Triumph United Comment Contest. Our most sincere thanks to everyone who makes this site a two-way exchange of information by posting opinions, tips, and punchlines in the comments section. But which comment was the most shirt-worthy this week? First, let’s give props to those who fell just short of the glory…

5th Runner-Up
“I told you I was hardcore.” — TheFeniX on New ‘Gladiator’ Loses Shit, Beats Husband

4th Runner-Up
I bet chuck took kimbo up on that bare knuckle fight and got demolished — Anonymous on F*ck! Chuck Liddell Injured, Out of UFC 85

3rd Runner-Up
If BJ licks sherk’s blood he may test positive for steroids in the post fight drug test. — steve-o-plata on “…and licking the blood off his face while I’m punching him…”

2nd Runner-Up
Would lube and a giant fake cock be too obvious? — Kimbo’s Lice on Chuck Liddell’s Injury is Disturbingly Real

1st Runner-Up
I don’t have health insurance at my place of employment so to show my boss up and to make a point I punched myself in the cock really hard, cried like a girl, then put the video on youtube. Take that you wanker!!! Go Starnes!! — KTFO on What’s to Become of Kalib Starnes?

And the winner is…

“She’s the kind of girl you try and get pregnant on the first night just so she has a reason to call you back.” — BringYourOwnBooya! on Strikeforce Ring Girl Nicole Craner

Congrajatations, BYOB: You just won a t-shirt of your choice from Triumph United! E-mail us at and we’ll get you all hooked up. For everyone else, better luck next week. We’re pullin’ hard for you…

Cagepotato Comments

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allen7554- July 13, 2012 at 12:07 am
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babazukaz- October 20, 2008 at 1:32 pm
Hi everyone! nice to meet you!) I'm babazukaz, 27y.o. male from Singapore!)
baso babazukaso!
shutupandfight- July 4, 2008 at 6:59 pm
DAMN that's a badass shirt...had my wife wash it then dry it in the drier then wash it again then dry it in the i just need to run it thru a load of fresh concrete, rinse off the excess, and get some blood on it.
titties- April 28, 2008 at 1:46 pm
i thought KTFO's comment was the funniest
pookysdabomb- April 25, 2008 at 9:25 pm
This contest should be a user voted winner? holla if ya hear me!
Your moms favorite MMA star- April 25, 2008 at 2:38 am
kimbo's lice WAS the funniest.... but the winner WAS keepin it real!
King Silo- April 25, 2008 at 12:57 am
Kimbo's Lice was robbed! REMATCH!
knightrida- April 25, 2008 at 12:30 am
I remember laughing out loud when reading Kimbo Lice's comment the other day.
jacob- April 24, 2008 at 10:34 pm
who the fuck was judging these comments sir buzzkillington the third geez.
Joe Son- April 24, 2008 at 7:48 pm
True, FeniX. They really should have had a safe word.
TheFeniX- April 24, 2008 at 7:44 pm
Yea, because making a gay joke on the Internet is original... Then again, neither was my comment, but I didn't even consider mine funny. More of a slant on the insanity of dating a pro fighter of either sex. Seriously, there had to be warning signs early on, but maybe he liked being the gimp until things got out of hand.
duckie- April 24, 2008 at 7:29 pm
I laughed at it.. maybe im sick tho.

I thought the bottom of that shirt said jiu jitsu health club for some reason... someone should make that, its a much better saying.
C-Bus Allstar- April 24, 2008 at 7:15 pm
(Sorry for the double/triple post here)

The first runner up wasn't even funny. In fact, there's nothing funny about the statement. It's just.. well.. stupid.
C-Bus Allstar- April 24, 2008 at 7:14 pm
I understand the pre-tense of a joke, douchebag. What I meant was, there were OBVIOUSLY funnier choices, and they lost.

Maybe this contest is like Matthew Riddle, just too inexperienced to be a winner.
Joe Son- April 24, 2008 at 7:10 pm
I thought the last two were funny, especially the winner. You see, it subverts our normal expectations by suggesting that you'd actually want to impregnate a girl on a one-night stand, just because she's so hot. That's the opposite of what we'd usually expect a man to say. Because we aren't expecting it, that reaction seems humorous.

Nothing's funnier than explaining a joke.
meh- April 24, 2008 at 6:49 pm
none of them were funny.. =(
C-Bus Allstar- April 24, 2008 at 6:36 pm
Who the fuck is judging these things? Not saying that I said anything funny, only that Kimbo's Lice's comment is atleast 4 times funnier than both the First Runner-Up AND the Winner.

Kind of makes me :/